John Cena: The Interview...erm..thoughts?

[Supremo]

Reports suggesting that John is going to conclude his Completely Normal Week by opening his own retirement show, with Gunther vs. Cena going on first. For fuck’s sake, John. Why are you the way that you are?!

I can completely understand the (broken) logic. JohnGPT states that a top star should go out with a loss, doing everything possible to shine a light on the future and get new stars over, but it’s 2025. We’ve seen and learnt enough to know that it almost never works. It just ends up being a weird factoid on Wikipedia.

Just be Sting. Go out on top, in the main event of your own fucking show, and send everyone home as happy as can be.

Can you even imagine the vibes if Cena loses to Gunther in the opener and then there’s another three matches that have to follow it? It’ll be a complete disaster. The only reason people will keep watching is under the mad belief that something completely unrealistic will happen like Edge jumping the guardrail and demanding one more match.

He’s spoke at length about wanting his retirement match to pay tribute to his first match in WWE against Kurt Angle, I just never realised he meant he’d also be paying tribute to Angle’s last match against Baron Corbin, where he lost in the most depressing, forgettable way possible. 

The J-1000 model has really outdone himself, here. Indubitably.

Edited December 11, 2025 by Supremo

[LaGoosh]

I lost a fair amount of respect for the man when after one of his films was shelved by Warner Bros. for a tax break his response was "I'm sure it was done for the right business decisions". The ultimate corporate stooge.

[Infinity Land]

Isn't Trump meant to be turning up for this? If he is, I wouldn't be surprised if that played a part in the match order. 

[tiger_rick]

On 12/10/2025 at 9:22 AM, DavidB6937 said:

I was actually feeling more emotional about his retirement than I expected to considering he's never been my guy and he's not someone I'd ever look to re-watch his matches or anything like Bret/Shawn/etc. 

I'm almost the opposite of this. I always liked Cena. Remember watching his debut segment, which they've wheeled out almost as much as the DX tank over the years, and being intrigued as I'd followed a few of those OVW lads around that time. I was massively into the heel rapper character and never soured on him all the time he was a full time performer.

I've defended him on here a million times over the years. His best work was superb and the rest was always good enough. It never mattered that the STF was abysmal or that some of his verbiage was childish. He was great at what he did, on and off screen, despite half the crowd hating him - he was the proper Hogan-lite that they'd craved all those years. When The Rock came back, I thought that showed how good Cena was. 

After the Rock feud as he became more part-time, I just never missed him. There was a clear irony in him becoming exactly what he'd criticised The Rock for becoming in their feud. No wonder he think's CM Punk taking the Saudi money is some emotional turnaround. 

Genuinely, I don't know the last time I was excited to see Cena. The only match of his I've watched in the last 5 years is that shite with Bray Wyatt at CovidMania. I don't know what I'd seen in the couple of years before that. Saw some of that awful feud with Roman. Maybe that was the last bastion of my enjoyment of him.

A John Cena heel turn would have piqued my interest at almost any point between 2006 and the Roman feud but I've had no interest in it whatsoever. It seemed like a dreadful idea done for clicks and that's how it's transpired. I'm a little bit sad that his "retirement" and last run means absolutely nothing to me. Not even 1% tempted to watch whatever they've got planned at the weekend. No doubt it'll be everywhere. Whatever else the company lacks, it isn't weird social media accounts who think they're on the team.

Interested in where people think Cena fits on an all-time list. The company and their employees like to spout that he's a "GOAT". I really like a lot of his career and right off the top of my head, I'd put Hogan, Flair, Funk, Lawler, Piper, Dusty, Savage, Steamboat, Sting, Bret, Shawn, Austin, Foley, Danielson and Punk ahead of him for varying reasons. He didn't draw anything like the biggest draws, was a top babyface crowds hated and his ring work, while more than good enough for his spot, wasn't a patch on the real good workers who headlined. He's nowhere near top tier, let alone making one of those Mount Rushmore things fans bang on about.

Thanks for some of the memories, John. You fucking android.

[Supremo]

John’ll have the last laugh.

He won’t even need to audition for the next Terminator movie. The role is his. Affirmative.

[DavidB6937]

Did somebody say.. Terminator?

 

[Statto]

Part of me thinks him going on first is a kinda nice nod to the classic SNME model - send Hogan out first to get the attention of the people switching on expecting to see SNL.

Doesn't really work here though does it, as apparently it's not even on proper telly in the States, only Peacock.

[thatvinylgeek]

I think my plan is to watch the show, but as soon as they announce Cena, stop and turn on the match against AJ in Perth.

Watch that, soak in all the throw backs, get lost in the joy of the entire thing, and then never watch a Cena match again.

Hopefully I can trick my brain into thinking that was how he went out.

[Snitsky's back acne]

Can you imagine if Cena was still a heel for his last match? What would they have done!? The mind boggles. 

[BarryOVega]

Maybe he’s more normal than everyone thinks and he wants to go on first so they can’t shaft him on his post match speech like they did Goldberg

More likely it’s so they can show replays all show of him shaking hands with Trump or something 

[The Gaffer]

Tenner says the weirdo jumps into the crowd and sits front row for the rest of the show, to show he's a fan now just like the rest of us. 

[DavidB6937]

Stuff like this is better. Simple execution.

 

 

[Chili]

42 minutes ago, DavidB6937 said:

Stuff like this is better. Simple execution.

 

 

Brilliant that, it's so simple. I haven't seen Roman Reigns in a while, he's got some interesting gnashers on him.

[Hannibal Scorch]

1 hour ago, DavidB6937 said:

Stuff like this is better. Simple execution.

 

 

I’ve never been a Cena fan so this doesn’t get me in the feels, but it’s really well done. Great tribute. Shocked Cody got in it twice though, how’d he wrangle that?

[DavidB6937]

Just now, Hannibal Scorch said:

Shocked Cody got in it twice though, how’d he wrangle that?

You should see the 30 minute HHH edit!