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Posted

Just been to my local chippy (sadly not remarkable enough to make the chippy thread on here). A guy who was probably a painter and decorator, as he stunk of paint, followed me in after driving into his parking space full speed. I always say hello to the staff as I see them regularly, but first words out of his mouth are "Right, I'm fucking starving! What am I having?!". Luckily no kids in, but not the best first impression.

 

Orders his food, then starts changing his mind as the guy is serving everything up. Seems like he's high on coke because he's way too loud and talking way too quickly.

 

Gets given his wrapped up order and is about to walk out, but turns back and goes "Got any forks?!". The server holds out a polystyrene tray with some little  wooden forks with two  rounded prongs.

 

"You ain't got plastic ones?! You ain't got bigger than them?!" The server goes quiet on him, so he snatches one out and stomps off.

 

Soon as he's out of earshot I go "What a wanker!". The staff agreed and the shithouse move was revealed, because the server actually had another tray full of bigger, better, plastic forks, but they hold those in reserve for people who have got manners, while the dickheads get the ones so crappy you may as well use your fingers.

  • 2 months later...
  • 2 weeks later...
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Posted (edited)

Someone once went around the Isle of Wight pretending to be Francis Rossi of Status Quo. They were put up in a hotel, given VIP treatment island wide for about a week. I can't find the story any more, but I promise it's true. I think now, as I did then, what a miserable time I would have had if that were me. 

Edited by gmoney
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Posted
3 minutes ago, gmoney said:

Someone once went around the Isle of Wight pretending to be Francis Rossi of Status Quo. They were put up in a hotel, given VIP treatment island wide for about a week. I can't find the story any more, but I promise it's true. I think now, as did then, what a miserable time I would have had if that were me. 

That and the Weller one are so specific that they could get away with it.

Absolutely tremendous. 

  • 1 month later...
Posted

Can't think of a better place to put this. A guy in VN purchased a hugely expensive personalised phone number from one of the telecoms companies but didn't check the fine print. After spending hundreds of thousands he went off on a long holiday and they've reclaimed the number due to their T&C's. What's better is they are using local law to threaten him with defamation and would likely win over his own potential lawsuit. 

https://e.vnexpress.net/news/business/companies/fancy-272-000-phone-sim-card-revoked-after-3-months-of-inactivity-4826546.html

 

  • Paid Members
Posted

Every Friday my work do 'fat friday' where we get a takeout lunch. This week was a chippy (I forgot to take photos), and I picked it up.

When it was time for everyone to pay me most of them paid by bank transfer. Except for one person who paid her £4.60 in a pound coin and the rest in 10ps and coppers. She showed me she had £4 in pound coins first... good natured shithousing. ? 

 

  • 1 month later...
  • Paid Members
Posted

IMG20250210222934.thumb.jpg.bb8c68272d9896f3d6beb5fa761fc86f.jpg

 

Nob.

Want to watch a video without it going pause-play-pause-play-pause-play ten times every second? 

Want to read a webpage without it scrolling all the way to the bottom and highlighting everything on its way? 

  • 2 weeks later...

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