Loki Posted November 1, 2011 Share Posted November 1, 2011 Fucking hell, Gladstone... you'll second just about anything, huh? Â Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted November 1, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 1, 2011 See, Loki. This is what happens when you're not online and Rockwell needs someone to pick on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted November 3, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 3, 2011 This made me laugh for a good few minutes:- Â All the seat does is raise you half an inch above the water, and makes the hole you sit in an inch thinner in diameter. I need that extra inch diameter, and the plastic edge to not cut into my arse skin. Â So you're doing turds literally too big to fit through a toilet seat? "Gots to have that extra inch, or this three-footer ain't gonna fit!" Â You must have an anus like the tire of a landrover. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Halitosis Romantic Posted November 3, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 3, 2011 That whole thread is cracking me up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Bus Surfer Posted November 3, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 3, 2011 Yeah, great effort in that thread. Justice is a sick man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cobra_gordo Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 I'll second that Gladstone. Gold that whole fucking thread now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Family Guy PMSL Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Pissflaps Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members gmoney Posted November 3, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 3, 2011 Woy's on fire in that thread.  The whole sitting versus standing debate always pans out the same way. Neither party can figure out how the fuck the other manages it. But it all comes down to having your system that works. Whether you're a sitter or a stander, unless your underwear is constantly streaked with shit, then whatever your doing is probably getting all the particles of feces from your anus and botty, and works for you. The real freaks here are the non-seaters. Christ alive. I just went into the toilet to empty all the urine out of my cock, and tried to fathom it. You must be sat with your legs splayed out at ten to six just to keep from slipping in, like some kind of masturbating toad.  Cracked me up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cobra_gordo Posted November 3, 2011 Share Posted November 3, 2011 Woy's on fire in that thread.  You must be sat with your legs splayed out at ten to six just to keep from slipping in, like some kind of masturbating toad.  Cracked me up  I tried reading that thread at work whilst talking to customers. I failed miserably thanks to that one line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awards Moderator HarmonicGenerator Posted November 4, 2011 Awards Moderator Share Posted November 4, 2011 That whole thread is full of wonder/horror, but I'm glad I was alone in the office when I laughed like a madman reading this post by cobra_gordo, which I henceforth nominate:   hinders your wiping range  Why can I imagine you standing in front of one of those massive strategy tables in old war movies where they move all the pieces around to come up with a plan of attack.  "Ok chaps, the way I see it we have to squat, part and scrape. Don't stand up mind, that will just hinder our wiping range. What what."  "Nein! Ich habe shit all over mein arse cheeks. Damn Steve Justice und dein krazy viping ideas!"  I do love a good what what, what what. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Fatty Facesitter Posted November 6, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 6, 2011 air raid on international football in the Prem thread, spot on for me.  International breaks are bollocks, aren't they? My own sweet lot always seem to be hitting their stride just as a break comes, and while I don't worry particularly about injuries - these happen in training too, after all - I do worry about disrupting the flow. Two weeks between league games makes me worry about players getting back "in the swing of things", especially if the next game comes against - no offence to these teams - opposition that won't have the same problem because they aren't fielding international players, 1-11 as it were. The current trend of having the games on Friday and Tuesday as opposed to Saturday and Wednesday is even more bollocks as it means no football at all on a Saturday. Fudge to that, I have enough of that over summer! I'll throw this on the ever-growing pile of "things were better when I were a kid" - in my youth, you played your league games EVERY saturday unless there were FA cup ties, and when England played they played one game, on a Wednesday night, meaning no missed weekends of domestic action. And because there were fewer England games, they seemed to matter more. Every game was "first team" with almost no wacky experimenting, and every game you could judge how good the team was by the result. None of this losing 2-1 at home to a fading France or drawing with someone like Ghana and talking about the positives and "what the manager has learned tonight" - poor result, Jimmy Hill or Des would have said.  Therein is the real difference - the importance of international games is so much less for me because the number of them diluting their importance. Qualifying for a tournament used to mean groups of four, a mere six games to spread over two years, because there were fewer countries playing International football, and it was easier to beat many of thm because most of them had next to none of their better players playing in the major leagues of Europe. When you came up against Bulgaria, for example, you recognized Stoichkov from Barcelona, and that was it really. Then Yugoslavia and Russia decided, for a laugh, to split into precisely 732 different nations and ruin it all. Now qualifying for a tourney can mean up to twelve qualifiers against farmers, taxi drivers and Championship players - many of whom turn out to be as good as our mollycoddled, overpaid prima donnas.  Yeah, I'm not that arsed about the England team either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fye Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 seconded, excellent post above Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members air_raid Posted November 8, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 8, 2011 Context HERE. Â At the end of the day, if the UFC cut Brock, then he could work return to WWE, or work anywhere else. Silly question really. Â Why would WWE take him back though? Wouldn't it be like sloppy seconds, if UFC cut him? Â Liked it, for sheer topicality. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Halitosis Romantic Posted November 8, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 8, 2011 Niiiice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gordon_The_Gopher Posted November 25, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted November 25, 2011 From the IPW:UK 7 Year Anniversary Thread, this post from gadge is masterful if the homage to Sloan is understood:  Because imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, or something...  24/11/11 In this update :  Lion Kid sign update Exclusive sign preview Join the Pride! One more card rundown  Lion Kid sign update --------------------------- I'm happy to announce that the Lion Kid sign is now ready! I've done ten letters, and as you'll see, I have come up with another idea for how to answer Mr HG's query of "How you supposed to do "Lion Hands" and hold a sign at the same time?"    Exclusive sign preview!!!!!!!! ---------------------------------------- You'll have to excuse the really, really awful photo of me here, but this is my idea for how to attempt to do Lion Hands and hold a piece of card at the same time...    Join the Pride! ---------------------------------------- With all this insanity going on, why don't YOU join the Pride? Lion Kid for champ!   One more card rundown ----------------------------------------  This show is so going to rock! THIS SUNDAY!!!!  Therefore the card for the IPW:UK 7 Year Anniversary Show looks as follows: Undisputed British Tag Team Championships: - The Leaders (Zack Sabre Jnr. & Marty Scurll) Vs The Young Bucks (Matt & Nick Jackson)  Undisputed British Heavyweight Championship: - Sha Samuels Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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