FLips

To think in another timeline we’d all be celebrating 20 years of OTTER Forum

I’ve always been keen to know this too as whenever I donate I worry it might be a drop in the ocean.

Been posting here since I was a teenager after TAFKA Marky B Kraze introduced me to it while watching Misawa tapes after a training session. I have inadvertently met probably a few of you at shows when I was a trainee, and some of you may possibly remember me once as a crowd plant Dragon Aisu and Magik “attacked” at some random show in Coventry back in like 2005. I also worked the merch stand at the 1PW show where Kid Kash assaulted a camerawoman. I never stuck with the wrestling training and thankfully to be honest as nearly everyone I met during my brief period in BritWres got either publicly or privately outed during the #MeToo movement. Early days of this place I was no good. Childish, immature, posted just real braindead shit and made enemies out of the likes of Mr Seven, Kendal Mintcake and probably a few others. Thankfully I did a lot of growing up and I do remember getting a genuinely nice feeling when Devon Malcolm and Butch off-handedly said I was a decent poster. Really felt like I’d shaken the shit reputation I had. Eventually became a bit more vocal when it came to off-topic and after all these years got voted Poster of the Year which is bonkers when you think of how I started on here. I’ve debated leaving a a few times lately, not in a stroppy “won a tenner on the horses” way but more that I’m almost entirely detoxed from the internet these days and this is the last consistent website I visit other than BBC Sport. Couldn’t bring myself to do it though, it’s a very comforting place to know is always around.

Completed Shadow of The Beast II for the first time ever today. Only took me 30+ years to manage it and now I can do it on Easier Mode in 11 minutes. More a lesson in memory than actual skill but I’ve always had a soft spot for the series.

Yeah this is the fella. My wife watches a lot of 90 Day Fiance bollocks and despite being a cretin this little neckless chode seems to show up every season because he’s a nightmare that gets people talking. Really horrible little goblin man.

I’m not someone that cares much about internet drama, and I care even less about Ed Sheeran. That being said Ed Sheeran’s entire public persona collapsing has been a blast to explain to my wife who loves the gossip, and he’s now the third most talked about Ed in our house, behind Big Ed and ED-209.

Practical Magic My wife made me watch this ahead of her going to see the new one. It’s not Hamilton levels of rubbish but I wouldn’t say it’s a good film. Thankfully she was going to see the new one with her Mam and Sister so it means last night I was home alone with the dog. I bought a spatchcock chicken, a bottle of red and put How The West Was Won on, which is much more on my level. Loved the presentation of it with the intermissions and overtures, thought the narrative thread of the one family going through all the individual stories kept things interesting too. It’s got a cast to end all casts but it’s Gregory Peck and James Stewart that really stand out in their respective segments. It was filmed in some sort of Panavision I think it’s called? But basically 3 screens taped together almost like a big curved widescreen monitor. At times you can see the lines where the screens connected but thankfully the DVD seems to be restored to the point this is barely visible for the most part, but you do get some weird shots clearly made for that screen, similar to when you watch a 3D film in 2D.

I’m the opposite in that it’s exactly what I wanted. The original game but it looks better, plays better and has a load of QoL improvements. I enjoyed FFVII Remake but it padded it with so much bollocks and turned an already convoluted story into more of a mess. Rebirth I’ve tried and gave up on twice now because it’s such a long paint by numbers slog, it may as well be a Ubisoft game. Stretching it over 3 games in the space of 7 years is criminal to retell the story of a PS1 game as well.

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai across The 8th Dimension I really didn’t get this on my first viewing a while back, but like I did the first time I saw Napoleon Dynamite and The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou I came away knowing I’d missed the joke so watched it again and loved it. This is the 3rd time watching this weird cult sci-fi rock and roll comedy comic book adventure thing and I’m fully on board with it now. Just a load of mental ideas that the cast throw themselves into with full commitment and it somehow works. Inside Man Bank job thriller directed by Spike Lee, starring Denzel Washington, Jody Foster and Clive Owen and somehow manages to waste the talents of all of them including the director. A bank heist film with next to no stakes and even less payoff. Denzel works his socks off as usual but has very little to do. Training Day If you want Denzel at his best then this one is for you. Plays a right bastard corrupt cop who sets up rookie Ethan Hawke something rotten. Thought this was top shelf stuff from start to finish. Street Kings Name me a worse actor that’s somehow had such a huge career as Keanu Reeves. I’m sure he’s the nicest man on the planet but christ. At least this one has the benefit of being a film that wouldn’t necessarily have been any better if he wasn’t in it. The Sting I didn’t think much of the plot as the stakes never feel as high as the film tries to make it out to be and not enough is shown of Shaw to really push him as the ruthless mob boss he’s meant to be rather than a complete mark that gets outwitted at every step, but I’d be hard pressed to name another film with three main players that ooze as much class and charisma as Redford, Shaw and Newman do in this. I also had a moment of confusion too as to how James Earl Jones looked so old this long ago but it turns out his Dad was an actor who looked and sounded exactly like him. The Entertainer is going to be stuck in my head for days now too.

The Harder They Fall It was so-so. The twist at the end humanises Idris Elba’s bad guy to the point the revenge plot that’s fuelled the film means nothing. There’s nothing wrong with a straight up revenge plot, especially in a Western. Just commit to it. Edge of Tomorrow Thought this was really good but yet again had a deflating ending that tried to wrap things up a bit too nicely. Tom Cruise just never ages does he? I didn’t even realise there was an age gap between him and Emily Blunt. Field of Dreams Just a great film isn’t it? Had a nice happy cry at it. He played catch with his Dad! The Godfather 1-3 First two are nearly flawless and this time I watched the Coda edited version of 3 which felt less of a slog but omits Michael’s actual death which I think was better in there than the ending they do here. It’s uncanny how the story beats of this match The Sopranos (or probably not that coincidental I imagine), especially in how the first film starts with this huge ensemble of characters, everyone riding high and they by the end all of the main characters family hates him, his closest friends are all dead and he’s just a misery guts remembering the good old days.

Spurs are going to earn me a lot of FPL points this season and not for the reasons they’d want. Between this season and last I can’t remember a team that felt so much like a freebie.

Casablanca Badly acted, the sets look cheap, the script at almost all times feels like a parody comedy sketch and yet somehow against all odds the two leads have enough charisma to pull through it and give me a film that I ended up really liking. The La Marseillaise scene is brilliant, and Captain Renault is a funny and eventually likeable side character. Definitely a film of it's time, I reckon critics would slaughter it with fresh eyes that didn't automatically tell them it's a classic, it's all a bit of a mess, if a likeable one. The Last Castle Robert Redford is a troubled veteran that ends up in a high security prison ran by a warden up to his eyeballs in stolen valour played by James Gandolfini. Redford goes in and immediately calls Gandolfini out for being a fanny so Gandolfini does what he does best and becomes a sly and vindictive bastard. Redford and Gandolfini play off each other well in this, even if the film is a little middling. Definitely one you have to suspend all disbelief for as it's not long before there's a chopper assault and over the top prison uprising. Good fun though all in all. Falling Down Really liked this the first time I saw it, really liked it this time too. Michael Douglas is a fucking nightmare in it that starts off making confrontational but somewhat agreeable arguments with people but slowly unravels as a full on stalker nutcase. Robert Duvall as solid as ever as the desk jockey retiring cop that tasks himself with stopping Douglas from getting up to more bother. Mad Max 1-3 Gonna bunch em all together, thought they were all pretty shit. They get better as they go on, both in quality and production value, but even Thunderdome, the best one, isn't up to much. Seven Psychopaths A film of two halves, one where Christopher Walken carries a bit of a crap script and premise into something better than it is, and one where Sam Rockwell drags it right back down. It ends up somewhere in the middle. Worth a once-through but I wouldn't bother watching it again. Super Mario Galaxy I've heard this described as "jangling keys - the movie" and it is pretty much that. Hardly any plot, but tons of fun and accurate references and easter eggs. Big pop for Pikmin and Star Fox showing up, though sadly both surprises were spoiled in the lead up to the release. It's exactly what I want from a videogame film though. Just fun, tons of references for me to go oooo and ahhh at and a feeling that the people who made it cared about the IP they have. Not a 10/10 film by any means but it made me happy. Magnificent Seven (Remake) Not as a good as the original but not bad. A decent cast minus Chris Pratt who by this point was post Parks and Rec and on the turn a bit. Denzel and Vincent D'Onofrio are the standouts in this, and Peter Sarsgaard plays a decent bastard. The Magnificent Seven theme is still a classic. Ferris Bueller's Day Off Just a brilliant feel-good film if you ignore that one of the main cast killed two women and another one is a paedophile. Blues Brothers Another one I enjoy more and more on rewatches. Great soundtrack, way more action than you'd expect and just has a lasting sense of weirdness throughout that makes it a wholly unique film that's good fun from start to finish. Out for Justice Made the mistake of enjoying this Steven Seagal flick and like Under Siege 1 and 2 did, got tricked into thinking he was a star who's films I need to watch more of. This was the best of a really bad bunch I watched, as this one is actually pretty good. There's one of the strongest openings to any film ever when he judo flips a guy through a car windshield and "OUT FOR JUSTICE" flashes up on screen on the still frame. He gets into a mental pool cue fight later and it's just all in all what you want from Seagal, lots of crap fight scenes where he sidesteps and flips people and he doesn't have too much to say. Flight of Fury, Today You Die, Out for a Kill Got a triple DVD pack of these three bombs. Watched them back to back and can't remember a thing about them other than they start bad with Flight and get progressively worse. Avoid the lot of them. Maximum Conviction I wouldn't call this a return to form, but it's definitely in the "so bad it's good" territory. Steven Seagal and Stone Cold Steven Austin X Assault on Precinct 13. At one point, Seagal slowly breaks a man's arm and calls him a pussy. I give it 3.5/5 Judo Throws. Gran Torino Clint Eastwood plays an old crochety Korean War veteran who befriends the local Hmong community despite his racism after they thank him for saving his next door neighbour from a beating. It's standard Eastwood stuff as he plays the grumpy loner with a heart of gold as tensions around him and in the community gradually build to a pretty bleak finish. I really enjoyed it. Jackass 4.5 It is what it is, Jackass past it's peak with not really much worth adding in the extra .5. Still gets laughs and the gang is still very likeable, but it's the bonus parts of the weakest film (not including the newest one which I haven't seen) so there's very little to talk about. Firing Knoxville out of the cannon dressed as an eagle is still one of my favourite stunts in the whole series though. Other standouts in this one is the covid meeting where they inflate a giant bouncy castle from under the table, one where they blow Danger Ehren up in a toilet, one where they kick people off a conveyor belt from a swing set and a really funny Bad Grandpa bit where he sets off the fire alarm on an old people's home while he's with a carer and all the old people come out completely naked. Actually in hindsight maybe there is a bit to talk about. Mortal Kombat 2 (the new one, not Annihilation) Exactly the same feelings on this as the Mario Galaxy film. Barely a plot but the whole thing is full of faithful nods and easter eggs. A lot to love about this if you've played the games, and even moreso if you, like me, didn't see the point in Kole from Mortal Kombat. Nothing in this is as interesting as the Scorpion and Sub-Zero stuff from the first film, but overall I thought it was great. Rental Family Brendan Fraser is a failing bit-part actor in Japan who gets hired by a "Rental Family" company where he basically has to act out parts in people's personal troubles. His first gig is pretending to be the Canadian groom of a woman to trick her parents into thinking she's moving to Canada with him when in reality she's a closeted lesbian who is fleeing with her wife. His next two gigs involve pretending to be a girl's Dad to get her into a private school and pretending to be a biographer for an old actor with dementia. It's a very bittersweet film with a bit of an unbelievable plot but Fraser is a tour-de-force in making the whole thing feel genuine, and his supporting cast are no slouches either. They make the most of the stunning Japanese scenery too and the whole thing was just a lovely little film. The Flintstones Had this as a kid and remember enjoying it. Some things are best left in the past as we turned this off after less than an hour. Dull.

Wait til you hear what I thought of Casablanca!

Breakfast at Tiffany’s Audrey Hepburn plays a chain smoking gobshite prostitute child bride who just can’t fathom why her life is falling apart while she runs around a million miles an hour making really poor salads and mistreating her cat. Her new neighbour follows her around like she’s got his staff discount card and won’t give it back. Absolutely don’t get it. Not a good film, and the main character is an absolute chore.