Worst signings ever

[SuperBacon]

Was sure we had this as a topic already but thinking about Antony and how shit he's been for United, got me thinking about worst signings. 

For Spurs, and there is such a wide field it could take me hours to pick, it has to be Tanguy Ndombele. 

A 60m record transfer who had the best ability on the ball since his near namesake, Dembele, he was a disaster for Spurs. 

Scored on his league debut and that was his peak. I never like to criticise players too much as its not fair and they're human (well most of them) and I think I've said it before on here, I just don't think he likes football, and it was just a way for him to provide for his family and fair enough.

This by Jamie Carragher sums up his time at Spurs and he's spot on.

I once saw an entire stadium boo him off the field against Morecambe. Deary me.

And since then? Well he's a spreadsheet wanker obviously picking up trophies in Italy and Turkey. How much he contributed to them I dunno but he still won them.

Such a shame as we all had high hopes for him.

Im also throwing in Darren Bent as he's an absolute nob and he was shit.

Over to you. Arsenal fans, Pepe? Liverpool fans, Voronin? Chelsea fans, haha, that could take a while.

[Carbomb]

United have had a few, though, just on price alone, Antony has to be the worst. Radamel Falcao was a terrible signing, though mercifully short. Massimo Taibi was unfortunate. Prior to Antony, I'd have said di Maria in terms of price vs. return.

[SuperBacon]

9 minutes ago, Carbomb said:

just on price alone, Antony has to be the worst.

Price, vibes, what he's done, that stupid fucking round the ball thing he did, his hair, his tattoos, his face, his attitude. 

Blokes a cunt. 

Taibi at least gave us one of the all time great gaffes. 

Makes you think...

[Cousin Jim Bob]

1 hour ago, SuperBacon said:

Was sure we had this as a topic already but thinking about Antony and how shit he's been for United, got me thinking about worst signings. 

For Spurs, and there is such a wide field it could take me hours to pick, it has to be Tanguy Ndombele. 

A 60m record transfer who had the best ability on the ball since his near namesake, Dembele, he was a disaster for Spurs. 

Scored on his league debut and that was his peak. I never like to criticise players too much as its not fair and they're human (well most of them) and I think I've said it before on here, I just don't think he likes football, and it was just a way for him to provide for his family and fair enough.

This by Jamie Carragher sums up his time at Spurs and he's spot on.

I once saw an entire stadium boo him off the field against Morecambe. Deary me.

And since then? Well he's a spreadsheet wanker obviously picking up trophies in Italy and Turkey. How much he contributed to them I dunno but he still won them.

Such a shame as we all had high hopes for him.

Im also throwing in Darren Bent as he's an absolute nob and he was shit.

Over to you. Arsenal fans, Pepe? Liverpool fans, Voronin? Chelsea fans, haha, that could take a while.

 

To be fair to be Ndombele who I know was shite for you lot but wasn't Mourinho your manager then ? It is probably easy to start hating football with that twat as your boss. Admittedly he doesn't seem happy anywhere now tbh, getting loaned all over the place.

 

For Blackburn Rovers I would go with Kevin Davis for 7.5 million in 1998. Who was absolutely useless. 2 goals in 27 appearances we got for that and we fucking threw in James Beattie as part of the deal as well. Who went on to be Southampton's player of the season that year. To add to the misery his goals kept them up that first season and Davis's lack of them got us relegated.

Edited 16 hours ago by Cousin Jim Bob

[TheBurningRed]

Antony for the price he cost, but I’d say Di Maria or Sanchez. Two players who really had no interest in playing for us. And they were actually players who were good. Antony scored plenty in the Dutch league. Which isn’t hard for a player of his pace and also the with that team. But the other two were two quality players who were just shite for us.

Falcao, Sancho and Schneiderlin have to be up there as well. People will say Van De Beek but the poor fucker spent the majority of the time on the bench so we didn’t get to see how he could’ve performed if he was consistently starting.

When this topic comes up about United, fans always mention Barthez/Forlan/Veron. Yeah, they never performed as highly as they should’ve. But Barthez was really good that first season. He just became a bit more mad the following season. Forlan could’ve scored more but still did a decent job. That Chelsea game sticks out for me. And Veron wasn’t actually that bad. Performed better in the Champions League but he wasn’t dreadful.

I think it was Gary Neville who said it, but we really are a graveyard for players these days. 

[Devon Malcolm]

Taibi was a good goalkeeper who had a really good career, hung out to dry because of one mistake at a time when David James was dropping them in his net on a near weekly basis. 

[Nexus]

Forest have a load, but just since promotion:

 

Jesse Lingard - turns out vibes aren't enough

Matt Turner - honestly Arsenal absolutely swindled us and I can't blame them

Hwang Ui-Jo - sex pest

Emmanuel Dennis - just wasn't given a chance

Jonjo Shelvey - shit, glad he fucked off to Turkey

Andre Ayew - waste of space

Xande Silva - shit

Gaetan Bong - joke of a player

Harry Arter - wanted to get rid of him in January 2021, managed to stay until 2024 due to an auto extension following staying up in the Prem. 

 

Prior to that, just a series of shocking forwards:

Spoiler

Djamel Abdoun

Rafik Djebbour

Jamie Mackie

Lars Veldwijk

Chuba Akpom

Simon Cox

Matt Derbyshire

Ishmael Miller

James Thorne

Nelson Oliveira

Federico Macheda

Daryl Murphy

Lee Tomlin

Jason 'Cumdog' Cummings

Gboly Aribiyi

El Arbi Hillel Soudani

Leo Bonatini

Gil Dias

Karim Ansifarad

Nuno Da Costa

Sammy Ameobi

Rafa Mir

Tolis Vellios

 

[gmoney]

Chelsea have a rich history of signing expensive strikers that then turn the football into balloons. 

Robert Fleck, Chris Sutton, Fernando Torres, Andriy Shevchenko all joined for massive fees are were either past their prime or didn't have a prime (Fleck). 

[Carbomb]

29 minutes ago, Devon Malcolm said:

Taibi was a good goalkeeper who had a really good career, hung out to dry because of one mistake at a time when David James was dropping them in his net on a near weekly basis. 

That's why I said he was unfortunate. It seemed like a mistake threw him off balance for a while, skewing perception of an otherwise good goalie.

[SuperBacon]

10 minutes ago, gmoney said:

Chelsea have a rich history of signing expensive strikers that then turn the football into balloons. 

Me and Punkstep like to have a regular chuckle about West Ham and their absolutely shit series of strikers they've had over the years.

@Nexus One that was really disappointing between our clubs was Andy Reid. Classy player but maybe the chubbiest midfielder I've ever seen, Ndombele included!

[Nexus]

Tbf you spent the money on Dawson really, Reid was just a lovely bonus for you...

[SuperBacon]

7 minutes ago, Nexus said:

Tbf you spent the money on Dawson really, Reid was just a lovely bonus for you...

Oh for sure, but at the time it was very much seen as the other way round by lots of Spurs fans.

[DCW]

I'd a few pints with Andy Reid when he was still playing in the Premier League with Charlton I think. He was filming a show for Irish language telly where minor Irish celebrities give playing an instrument a go down in my local Irish social club. I can't speak a bean of Irish, but the pints are tax free cos its a social club, so I go the odd time. He was playing the banjo with a few folk lads and he actually had a decent voice too. But yeah, probably not something you should be up to when you already have a reputation for being a bit chubbed up!

 

[Abe_Knuckleball_Schwartz]

Andrea Silenzi, first Italian to play in the Premier League. Signed for £1.8 Million from Torino. He was useless! I can remember him not being able to control the ball properly. He did score a goal in the League Cup though.

How he ever got a cap for Italy is beyond me.

[RedTwoster]

Rafael Scheidt (genuinely pronounced, unless we were misinformed by the Scottish press at the time, as ‘shite’) at Celtic has to be up there. £5million in 1999, after the club made an assumption on his level of ability based on him being capped a few times for Brazil. Boss John Barnes admitted he’d never seen him play. But hey, caps for Brazil have to count for something, right?

Well…not so much. Brazil were handing out caps left, right and centre at the time, so it was inevitable there would be a few misfires. 

My memory is fuzzy, but according to Wikipedia he only made 3 appearances for Celtic (I was sure he’d made a few more, but apparently not) - and Scheidt (appropriately) utterly honked in each one. He ended up going on loan to Corinthians, never to return.

A few years ago he even admitted the next Celtic manager, Martin O’Neill told him that he didn’t like players like him - he liked players who ‘played well’. A bit harsh, but Rafael really was awful.