Mental health

[Chris B]

5 hours ago, theironshake said:

So since my last post I managed to get the balls and send her the CCTV of her snogging the man outside my business. She is now taking action for a data breach and I could lose my alcohol licence and be massively fined. Seriously she cheats I catch her and I could get done for it. I'm glad I got rid of her but on top of everything I find she is a massive arsehole. And possibly a narcissist 

Honestly dude, I'd suggest stepping away and moving on as fast and thoroughly as possible. If you're glad to be rid, that's only a good thing. But there isn't going to be a win here by trying to push her on anything. Concentrate on protecting yourself.

You'll want to take better advice than a message forum for this, because it's a legal matter but if you think she's serious about taking action, I'd strongly suggest getting ahead of it - talk to whoever you need to in order to fess up about using the footage, and talk about losing a close friend, your father being ill, and everything you're dealing with.  Talk to UNITE or whatever union you're in. It's a big area, unfortunately, and it sounds like you did screw up, as understandable as that is - whatever it is, figure out what protecting yourself looks like at the moment.

[DavidB6937]

I'm very much a "well this shit happens every day not just on these days!" kinda guy, but just some reminders on World Suicide Prevention Day.

Please always reach out to someone somewhere. Even if it's Samaritans. You never have to be alone.

 

 

[The King of Old School]

That Norwich video is one that hits you every time.

[lars85]

Dad's funeral was yesterday. It's been an absolute rollercoaster of emotions. Laughter, heartbreak and everything in-between. What really moved me was how all his friends, most of whom I haven't seen since I was a kid, rallied round and looked after me and my sisters. So much love and support. A true testament to how much my dad was loved and how he chose his friends. I knew his funeral wouldn't be conventional, he never was. He came to the church on the back of his old American pickup truck, playing New Orleans jazz funeral music. With his beloved dog Oreo accompanying him. In my eulogy I mentioned Dude Love, The Sopranos, Iron Maiden and the Wu Tang Clan. No hymns during the service, just Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, David Lee Roth, Frank Zappa and Tom Waits. 

He was buried with a can of coke, a toblerone, his personalised number plate, a monster in my pocket from me and the collars of his three dogs who died before him. 

Him and his best friend had a deal. Whoever went first, the other had to put a certain death announcement in the paper. And his best friend didn't let him down. I know dad would be laughing at this and thankful his best mate stuck to his word. 

I love you dad. You were the best of me. I'll see you down the road.

 

Edited October 8 by lars85

[d-d-d-dAz]

Historically, i've had very tricky bouts of anxiety. My earliest memories of struggling were panic attacks relating to a fear of mortality as a child.

Recent years I seem to have had really bad flare ups around specific, diffuse issues; but i'm turning 40 in 6 months and all those issues seem to have built to send me back to my childhood, and I feel just completely overwhelmed by waves of existential dread. Just a real sinking feeling in my stomach, heart palpitations, panic rising. It's really quite awful, and I hope it'll pass as it's utterly unbearable.

Sorry, I appreciate that isnt as serious as the stuff in this thread but I just need to get it off my chest as it's really hard to talk to someone about it and be taken seriously. Everyone gets old, I know. I need to get over it, I know. But that doesn't make it feel any less awful right now.

[SuperBacon]

13 minutes ago, d-d-d-dAz said:

Sorry, I appreciate that isnt as serious as the stuff in this thread but I just need to get it off my chest as it's really hard to talk to someone about it and be taken seriously

Everyone's pain and suffering is relative to their own situation mate, its no less serious. 

You been to discuss it with a medical professional? That would help.

Keep fighting the good fight brother.

[DavidB6937]

1 hour ago, d-d-d-dAz said:

Historically, i've had very tricky bouts of anxiety. My earliest memories of struggling were panic attacks relating to a fear of mortality as a child.

Recent years I seem to have had really bad flare ups around specific, diffuse issues; but i'm turning 40 in 6 months and all those issues seem to have built to send me back to my childhood, and I feel just completely overwhelmed by waves of existential dread. Just a real sinking feeling in my stomach, heart palpitations, panic rising. It's really quite awful, and I hope it'll pass as it's utterly unbearable.

Sorry, I appreciate that isnt as serious as the stuff in this thread but I just need to get it off my chest as it's really hard to talk to someone about it and be taken seriously. Everyone gets old, I know. I need to get over it, I know. But that doesn't make it feel any less awful right now.

Mr Bacon already made the point but you should never compare what you're going through to anyone else and try to dismiss how you're feeling. That's just not how life works. I still moan about my house being cold while there are people living on the streets or drinking dirty water in other countries etc. We all have our shit right? Doesn't mean yours is any less important than anyone elses.

Anxiety is a real struggle. Been there and done that. The feeling of loss of control is really quite scary. I remember the first panic attack I ever had - on a train, alone in a carriage in the middle of nowhere, thinking I was having a heart attack. Quite a familiar concept to many that have been through it but I hadn't, nor was I aware of what the symptoms were etc, so it was really fucking scary.

Thankfully I haven't had too many since and my awareness is far greater now but anxiety in itself can just be a crippling horrible thing to have to live with. The constant dread or worry or whatever else. I would very much suggest some kind of medical approach whether it's medication or therapy - I certainly found therapy really helpful myself and I've had it on and off since for various reasons.

As you say - it's a really fucking difficult thing to talk about openly and for others to actually really listen and understand, rather than just dismissing it as being 'a bit nervous' and that it'll pass. Your feelings deserve to be taken seriously and you don't need to see it as 'I need to get over it' because you don't. So don't push yourself to do so or beat yourself up for feeling how you do. I hope you can get some kind of help and allow yourself to believe everything you're experiencing is valid and okay. The world is a difficult place and life and mortality are really fucking scary at times.