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Unintentionally funny moments in gaming


Mr. Seven

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*A poor subtitle, I know.

 

Games are great aren't they? But from time to time they tend to glitch and fuck up, making a mockery of technology in the process. It's usually irritating in the case of Fallout: New Vegas and its many game-stopping bugs but it can also be absolutely hilarious.

 

Last night I was playing the godlike FIFA 11 with a friend. Saddos that we are, not only do we have an ongoing series (it's currently 24-19 to him and this comes in the wake of our epic Pro Evo 6 battle that finished up in his favour at a worrying 200 games to 197, but I digress) but we like to recreate the footy that took place that day.

 

To wit, it was Blackpool (me) versus Villa (him). He's 2-1 up with five minutes on the clock. Brad Friedel catches a routine cross and prepares to safely dispatch it to his defence. One of my players is hanging around behind him. Fridel then proceeds to hurl the ball full-force into the back of James Collins, the rebound coming to my player who duly slots in as Friedel vainly hacks him down as the ball crosses the line.

 

A combination of this madness and Friedel's cold AI features turning ninja-like at his mistake left us pissing ourselves for several minutes. Naturally the goal has been saved but alas I cannot upload it due to not having the ol' Xbox Live set up.

 

Anyways, fill this thread with similar stories of unintentional videogame humour. Plz.

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Fifa 11 is brilliant for stuff like that. Not on the same scale as Ninja Freidel, but two of my favourite gaming memories come from from playing Fifa and Pro Evo. Me and a fellow Canary friend of mine often have a debate over Simon Lappin. My positive comments about him baffle my friend who thinks he's absolute shit and doesn't contribute anything. I really respect Lappin, because despite being frozen out under Glenn Roeder he didn't seek a move, stayed and fought for his place and eventually got back into the team, plsu he's pretty reliable. Still, this wasn't good enough for my friend.

 

So we have a night with a few other uni lads round his house with beer, pizzas and the like. We stick Fifa 11 on. I pick Norwich and he picks Man City thinking he's going to absolutely whoop me. I hold on for 45 minutes and proceed to bring on the mighty Lappin at half time, sticking him up front for shits and giggles. And what does he do? He scores in the last minute to win me the game! The scenes of celebration were fucking brilliant. Food went everywhere, a bottle of Corona got knocked over on the table right next to my pal (sat cross legged next to it) who got covered in it, and there was lots of girly screaming and absolute amazement that of all people, Lappin netted the winner.

 

Snooker games are good for childish sniggering at double entendres.

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My favourite FIFA fuck-up of all time was back in FIFA 06, or possibly 07, on PS2.

 

Norwich vs Newcastle, the keeper gets a hand to the ball and it creeps towards the line, not sure if it's going to go in. Newcastle's salvation comes in the form of Jean-Alain Boumsong, who races back, and prepares to hack the ball clear... only he totally misses it, falls over, and puts the ball into the net with what had been his standing foot on the way down. I believe I won that game 10-0.

 

Along the Football Manager lines, I recently played a Champions League game in which the opposition had several men sent off, several men injured, and ended up down to 4 men. I know this isn't within the laws of the game in reality, but the sight of my players lining up for a free kick, with all 3 of the opposition's remaining outfield players forming the wall, and my entire team camped in the box, will live with me for some while.

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Playing WWF WrestleMania on the old Amiga 500, aeons ago. Hulk Hogan vs The Mountie.

 

I'm giving him a bit of a kicking at ringside, when suddenly Mountie sprints, full speed, out of the ringside area, off the screen - to never return.

 

After a few minutes of ambling around in vain, I realised he wasn't coming back.

 

I turned the computer off, bemused by Mountie seemingly taking the old Honky Tonk intentional countout.

 

Took me years to twig that it was a freak glitch in the game, never to be repeated.

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This at the time was not funny, but looking back at it is funny in a tragic way.

 

Doing a mission on GTA: San Andreas, towards the end when CJ and Sweet are trying to gain territory for the gang, there's a mission where you and he have to take out maybe 30 guys. So I played, did well and managed to kill everyone. As I fist pumped the air to congratulate myself on my awesomeness I could hear an ambulance coming, presumably to deal with the wake of dead gang member bodies I had strewn about the ghetto. The ambulance swerves around the corner and runs over Sweet. Mission failed. I was fucking livid.

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I sense this thread, and indeed the following contribution to it, will be lost on everyone else due to the "you had to be there" aspect but here goes:

 

Over christmas the dad in law was very keen on having a go at Gran Turismo 5. He's a mechanic, a major car buff, has done well in the odd rally and goes on those "drive a supercar" driving days every so often. In real life, he is genuinely an exceptional driver. He spends a ridiculous amount of time on Flight Simulator and has now turned his attention to learning to fly for real. He'd heard GT5 was analogous to driving as Flight Sim is to flying, and was really bigging up the "most realistic ever driving game" aspect of GT5. Absolutely itching for a go.

 

He picked a Ferrari Boxer in a field of cars, the best of which was an Audi A3. The rest were small Japanese box type cars if I remember correctly. Upon the game beginning he crashed his car on the very first corner (and then the next 4 corners afterward). He then proceeded to get lapped by the whole field of cars. Twice (it was a two lap game). Afterward he throws the controller down and moans about how it's nothing like real driving, no wonder the car accident rate is so high among teens when driving games are so poor, his thumb hurts from the controller, etc.

 

One from personal experience: playing Street Fighter 4 against a self-professed expert, I unleashed a ridiculous combo to begin a round that took off about 95% energy. (Fluke of course, button mashing gone right. I never repeated it.). I then ducked some outrageous airborne super combo and won the game with a perfect with a simple, pathetic jab. However, I then lost the following 20+ rounds. Not by a perfect though, so some bragging rights remained.

 

Nothing as remarkable as this though...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgSAOxwr0xE

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I remember once on football manager conceding a penalty (still 11 men on the pitch) and then the goalkeeper not being in the goal when the penalty was taken, no idea where he was but lets just say I wasn't best happy.

 

Something similar happened to me a few weeks ago on the same game a few weeks ago. In a pre-season friendly in my Blackpool game it was 1-1 at half time against Port Vale. Vale make a load of subs at half time, as do I. For some reason the Vale sub goalie is still walking onto the pitch from the bench, which allows DJ Campbell to score straight from kick off from the half way line!! The most bizarre goal I've ever seen in a game.

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I could go on for years about Pro Evo funnies.

 

 

I had a game where Bobby Huth ran into the goalpost when he was up for a corner, and stayed glued to it for the rest of the half.

 

My mate Dave used to go England whenever we were playing as national teams, and he'd always set his free kick taker as David James, he turned out to be fucking amazing at them as well, no lie. It was always hilarious seeing Calamity J curl them into the top corner from 30 yards. It got even funnier after we edited his free kick style to "D" (or Whatever Robby Carlos' style was), and he still kept banging them in, far too regularly.

 

 

I'll definitely be coming back to this, quality thread idea!.

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Playing WWF WrestleMania on the old Amiga 500, aeons ago. Hulk Hogan vs The Mountie.

 

I'm giving him a bit of a kicking at ringside, when suddenly Mountie sprints, full speed, out of the ringside area, off the screen - to never return.

 

After a few minutes of ambling around in vain, I realised he wasn't coming back.

 

 

This at the time was not funny, but looking back at it is funny in a tragic way.

 

Doing a mission on GTA: San Andreas, towards the end when CJ and Sweet are trying to gain territory for the gang, there's a mission where you and he have to take out maybe 30 guys. So I played, did well and managed to kill everyone. As I fist pumped the air to congratulate myself on my awesomeness I could hear an ambulance coming, presumably to deal with the wake of dead gang member bodies I had strewn about the ghetto. The ambulance swerves around the corner and runs over Sweet. Mission failed. I was fucking livid.

:laugh:

 

The latter makes me want to dig out San Andreas, which I gave up on after failing the 'Learning To Fly' level on many occasions. :/

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Similarly football game related, back in (i'd guess) 94/95? I'd head round a friends most evenings to play "Actua Soccer" on the Playstation.

 

One night, one of us was playing as Holland and one of their players, Stan Valckx had the ball. Brian Moore did the commentary i think, and announced something sounding remarkably like "bollocks"

 

From that moment on, we played Holland Vs Holland in an attempt to recreate George Weah's wonder goal, where he took the ball the length of the pitch and scored in order to hear the rather beautiful...

 

"Bollocks.....Bollocks.....Bollocks.....Bollocks.....BOLLOCKS.....BOLLOCKS.....BOLLOCKS! as we shot at goal.

 

Tiny things, and all that.

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I remember I was playing Pro once, probably Pro 5 on the PS2 and one of my players was running up the left wing, and the commentry said "he's running up the left". For the remainder of the game, the commentary seemingly got stuck on this and would only say things to do with "left" for the entirety of the rest of the game. "plays it to the left" "cross from the left" etc etc etc, no matter what actually happened.

 

I think my favourite glitch ever though had to be on Scarface on the original xbox. Sometimes cars wouldn't load properly and would just go invisible. It was best when it happened during the intro sequence, seeing Tony Montana fly around feet first as if he's driving a car but the car's not there? Hilarious.

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Anyone remember which footy game it was where if you scored an O.G., you got the goal given to your team. I'm thinking something dire like Euro '92 on the master system.

 

On of the Sensi soccer games had an awesome glitch where if you gave the opponent a throw in about 10 yards outside their area, they'd always try to throw it back to the keeper but you'd just intercept it and knock it into the empty net.

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Driver 2 on the PS was infamous for its glitches and awful pop up, but nothing will ever stick in my memory like the time I turned a corner and a school bus was standing there. Not just sitting in the middle of the road, actually sunk into the scenery and standing vertically, engine towards the sky. I tried all sorts to move it but nothing seemed to affect it! It had actually become part of the game, methinks.

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Driver 2 on the PS was infamous for its glitches and awful pop up, but nothing will ever stick in my memory like the time I turned a corner and a school bus was standing there. Not just sitting in the middle of the road, actually sunk into the scenery and standing vertically, engine towards the sky. I tried all sorts to move it but nothing seemed to affect it! It had actually become part of the game, methinks.

 

Driver on the PSX was glitched to hell - At least once I've managed to roll the car at full speed, clip something on the road and fly straight over the backdrop into the Hall of Mirrors.

 

Best I've seen so far without causing me to cuss was Red Dead Redemption, after having to deal with a man being chased by two bears coming out of Tall Trees. Immediately after yelling at me "Thanks! I thought I was gonna get gored up", he gets pounced by a cougar.

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