DVDs and Films You Have Watched Recently #2

[The King Of Swing]

That's a Sion Sono film, isn't it? Yeah, he's a nutter. I saw Suicide Club earlier this year and I wanted to commit suicide after seeing it - not because it was bad, but because it would stop me trying to figure the bloody thing out. Then there was his film about haunted hair extensions. Mental.

 

Yeah its a Sono film.

 

Its a shame because there are flashs of brilliance in Love Exposure and the acting is top notch (especially whoever played Koike) but in the end it just felt like a self indulgent mess of a film to me but for some fucking reason I now find myself wanting to watch it again

 

Suicide Club is a great mind fuck kind of film with some great scenes (that reminds me I gotta replace my bootleg of that with the R1 release one day) and there is also sequel/prequel/side story or whatever Noriko's Dinner Table which is next on my watch list.

 

But yeah Sono is fucking nuts

[Zebra Kid Mark]

I

[Devon Malcolm]

Watched a few things recently.

 

A couple of nights ago we had Paradise Lost, continuing our inadvertent Melissa George season. She doesn't actually do a lot in this except look fit in a bikini. In fact, none of the main cast really shine, quite possibly because there are too many of them and none of them really get much time to characterise. Still, that's not a priority in a film like this.

 

For all the cries of 'EXTREME EDITION' and 'MORE EXTREME THAN HOSTEL' on the box, it never lives up to either. It's just a run of the mill horror thriller with one or two good bits, but with elongated underwater bit which is completely disorientating and impossible to watch. It's okay though, but nothing more.

 

5/10

 

Room 205 is a Danish supernatural horror that quite clearly borrows huge chunks from Oriental horrors like Into The Mirror and Ring especially and despite one or two quite creepy parts, is largely boring and not really worth bothering with. Not one of the better recent Scandinavian efforts, but some nice Danish girls get it an extra mark.

 

4/10

 

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo was a film I was REALLY looking forward to seeing it and, to be honest, it was unlikely to live up to the crazed anticipation I had for it. Whilst that was the case, and it was disappointing in places, it was brilliant in others.

 

The storyline involving Lisbeth and her probation officer is brilliantly handled although

<-- click on 'spoiler' to show/hide the spoiler

you could spot she had a camera hidden in that bag a fucking mile away.

 

[close spoiler]

");document.close(); Despite that, it's done so well, and Noomi Rapace is far and away the best thing in the film. If she doesn't end up a massive star, I'll be amazed.

 

The central storyline is good, twisty and well handled but the build-up to Lisbeth meeting Blomqvist is ridiculously rushed, which is really bizarre in a two and a half hour film. Also, I thought the ending could have been so much better.

 

It clearly has quite a lot of faults, but it was never dull, the side stories are interesting and don't detract from the main course, and I really enjoyed it. I just really wanted it to be a bit better though.

 

7/10

[Gladstones Bitch]

I’d like to recommend people check out a documentary on ESPN Classic tomorrow called The Two Escobars. It tells the stories of the lives and violent deaths of Columbian international defender Andr

Edited November 30, 2010 by BxB Hulk

[neil's bitch]

Meet The Spartans

 

So this was on Film4 the other day, so i thought id tape it on the ole sky+ and give it a watch!

 

So as you guess, its an over the top mick-take of 300 and various otehr films/TV/Music based stuff from around that time. Most of which still stand up fairly well in there own right, although one reference to Brittany spear shaving her head made me feel a bit old!

 

Bar that i cant really say alot other than if you like this sort of film, give it a watch as i thought it was a bit funny, and i even laughed out loud to a few bits. The only thing id say about it is that if yo u on into this to watch "a movie" you'll be disapointed. If you go into this looking for a bit of a cheap laugh, give it ago as it might make you chuckle.

 

Some good jokes, some way to obvious jokes as well as some either old or amercian themed gags that made me feel a bit old, but again a good little chuckle here and there. Of the Spoof film series its one of the better ones.

 

6/10

[Chest Rockwell]

6/10 for Meet the Spartans?!? get the fuck out! This is just getting silly now...

[Devon Malcolm]

That's two people who have praised Seltzer & Friedberg films round here recently. First Dopper, now Bowyo. I'm considering starting a sweep stake for the next person to come out.

[Twatters]

I haven't watched any of those movies, i know i'd hate them.

Watched a horror called Steel Trap bought from Poundland yesterday. It's a pretty unoriginal (several people invited to a 'secret party' and are then killed off one by one) and average film. Unintentionally very funny in places, my favorite lines: guy looks at phone "signal blocked - what does that mean?" Girl: Someones blocking the signal"

 

Watched Home Alone last night, and added with the snow today has got me in the Christmas mood. Not just my favourite Christmas movie, but one of my favourite movies. The 15 minutes of them trying to burgle the house are so great!

[neil's bitch]

Zoolander

 

Another one that was on the other day that i taped, and i must say i love this movie.

 

If you havent seen it, give it a go, mainly for the ben stillers charecter. Not alot you can say about this film other than i think its supposed to take the mick out of ther modeling world and how shallow these people are. But it has some belly laughs and if yu like ben stiller, will ferral, owen wilson and various cameos, you'll like this film.

 

The only thing i will say is, why is ben stiller really good when he plays "a charecter". And when i say that i mean in alot of films, he sort of acts it straight as if its himself, and i dont find him funny at all. In films like this, he puts on a stange voice and over-acts it a little bit, and hes amazing!

 

Very funny, worth a buy (as thats how cheap im guessing it is these days),

 

7.5/10

 

Also:

 

The Fifth Element

 

Im guessing many wont see this how i do, but WHAT A FILM! Maybe i see it in a certain light, (it really reminds me of being a younger lad), but i love this film.

 

For those who havent seen it, the basic idea is that every 5000 years or so, the ultimate evil spurts into life in a mission to turn life to death, light to dark etc etc. The only way to stop this is to gather the 4 elements, (Water/Fire/Earth/Wind) around the Fifth (The supreme being), and the "devine light" will emit from the fifth element, sending the evil packing. Although if the evil stands where the fifth element should, the universe will die.......basically!

 

So we shift to some sort of future (i think its 2119 or somthing like that), where we have flying cars and a crazy dress sense. Bruce willis is a taxie driver and former marine of some kind. During all this some aliens who are bringing the 5 elements to earth, (to stop the impending return of said evil), get shot down. The only thing recovered is part of the fifth element, which looks like its hand.

 

Being the future and all, they use a machine to rebuild the fifth element, which turns out to, not only be a women......buts its a very hot Mila jonovich (sp?). As yo ucan imagine various stuff kicks off in trying to find the other elements, as the evil (shown as some sort of black planet like thing in outa space, which is something along the lines of 1200 miles in diameter), as Mr willis gets drawn in to save the day.

 

Various cameos from Chris tucker, the american guy who plays captain hollister in red dwarf and of course Mr Lee evans (~!), get special effects.....(well for 1997), and its almost still hold up well in 2010!

 

If you havent seen it, i must say.......what have you been doing? Go an watch it now!

 

8/10!

[patiirc]

Meet The Spartans

 

So this was on Film4 the other day, so i thought id tape it on the ole sky+ and give it a watch!

 

So as you guess, its an over the top mick-take of 300 and various otehr films/TV/Music based stuff from around that time. Most of which still stand up fairly well in there own right, although one reference to Brittany spear shaving her head made me feel a bit old!

 

Bar that i cant really say alot other than if you like this sort of film, give it a watch as i thought it was a bit funny, and i even laughed out loud to a few bits. The only thing id say about it is that if yo u on into this to watch "a movie" you'll be disapointed. If you go into this looking for a bit of a cheap laugh, give it ago as it might make you chuckle.

 

Some good jokes, some way to obvious jokes as well as some either old or amercian themed gags that made me feel a bit old, but again a good little chuckle here and there. Of the Spoof film series its one of the better ones.

 

6/10

 

I watched it thought it was shat, not worst film ever shat, but still shat. The ideas that could have been good were poorly implemented ( I quite liked the blue screen joke) and criminally a lot of it was completely and utterly devoid of humour whatsoever. The use of lookalikes and mimics over real people is okay as long as there isnt a multitude of them this had a parade of shit characters ( Paris Hilton disfigured, Donald Trump wig joke et al) and they were all awful. if we are doing scores then

 

2/10

 

 

Now what I did watch that was blummin' good was Passchendaele Written, Directed,Produced and Starring Paul Gross, Benton Frasier from Due South. This film regards the semi-fictionalised account about Paul's Grandfather and was a breath of fresh air. The main plot revolves around a man who is sent 'home' because of shell shock, falls in love with a nurse and the trials and tribulations therein, including the nurse being of German descent. Following problems with her brother the man ends up back at the front of WWI during the battle of Passchendaele.

 

Some of the plot is highly implausable, but it goes with the territory following the likes of the film Pearl Harbour. Canadian Scenery is stunning and the film is beautifully shot. The Battle stuff is Saving Private Ryan in World War I and then some, grim, doesnt cover it and there is a sense of being in the mud and rain and drudgery. There are two shocking moments during the fighting scene 1 genuinely sickening, the other some black comedy ( which permeates the film)

 

Worth a watch 8.5/10

[neil's bitch]

Meet The Spartans

 

So this was on Film4 the other day, so i thought id tape it on the ole sky+ and give it a watch!

 

So as you guess, its an over the top mick-take of 300 and various otehr films/TV/Music based stuff from around that time. Most of which still stand up fairly well in there own right, although one reference to Brittany spear shaving her head made me feel a bit old!

 

Bar that i cant really say alot other than if you like this sort of film, give it a watch as i thought it was a bit funny, and i even laughed out loud to a few bits. The only thing id say about it is that if yo u on into this to watch "a movie" you'll be disapointed. If you go into this looking for a bit of a cheap laugh, give it ago as it might make you chuckle.

 

Some good jokes, some way to obvious jokes as well as some either old or amercian themed gags that made me feel a bit old, but again a good little chuckle here and there. Of the Spoof film series its one of the better ones.

 

6/10

 

I watched it thought it was shat, not worst film ever shat, but still shat. The ideas that could have been good were poorly implemented ( I quite liked the blue screen joke) and criminally a lot of it was completely and utterly devoid of humour whatsoever. The use of lookalikes and mimics over real people is okay as long as there isnt a multitude of them this had a parade of shit characters ( Paris Hilton disfigured, Donald Trump wig joke et al) and they were all awful. if we are doing scores then

 

2/10

Oh yeah its well shat, but it made me chuckle in places, the blue screen gag being one of the better jokes. Mainly the idea is, if you go into it thinking "Well i know its shat, so i'll just enjoy myself", it comes across alot better, amainly as.....well.....its shat, but enjoyable shat, if you want it to be.

 

Still shat though!

Edited December 2, 2010 by Bowyo T

[Zebra Kid Mark]

I

[aaron]

Zoolander

 

. . .

 

Very funny, worth a buy (as thats how cheap im guessing it is these days),

 

7.5/10

 

Also:

 

The Fifth Element

 

. . .

 

If you havent seen it, i must say.......what have you been doing? Go an watch it now!

 

8/10!

 

I like The Fifth Element. I love Zoolander!~

 

"Really, really good looking".

"Magnum!~"

Etc.

[Egg Shen]

is there actually a market for the Meet The Spartans type spoofs then? i know Scary Movie kinda kick started that whole movement again, but these films genuinely get the worst reviews ever and i dont know anyone who watched them...they must be doing something right cause they keep fucking making em.

[Devon Malcolm]

is there actually a market for the Meet The Spartans type spoofs then? i know Scary Movie kinda kick started that whole movement again, but these films genuinely get the worst reviews ever and i dont know anyone who watched them...they must be doing something right cause they keep fucking making em.

 

Meet The Spartans made $85 million worldwide at the box office off a $30 million budget. Imagine how much more they made off the DVD market. As long as there are lot of thick people, there will be a market for these films.