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Idiots at work


Frankie Crisp

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So I had a few days off. During that time, I thought maybe it was time to give the idiot a fair chance and be more tolerant of her.

 

45 minutes into my first day back, however...

 

Maths for the insane:

 

Edited by The Waterboy
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Bloke at work today showed us his Mothers cottage which is up for sale. Next to the main picture of the house was an older black and white picture.

 

He said, "That's how the house looked in 1690."

I said "How do you know?"

"Because that's when the picture was taken"

"Cameras weren't around in 1690"

"Yes they were"

"No they weren't. And also, there were no conservatories in 1690"

"What do you mean"

"That picture shows a cottage with a conservatory at the back. Conservatories are quite modern so that photo can't be from 1690"

"Oh"

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I'm not sure if this is idiocy, lying, or a poor cow going senile, but....

 

I'm currently working as a court messenger, and since there are twice as many floors than messengers, we work on a rota basis. While picking up and dropping off files this afternoon, I overheard a woman saying "I asked Christopher (me) to look for the file yesterday but..." and just left it there, almost as though to say I didn't bother. Which is true, as she never asked me. More to the point, I never saw her yesterday as I wasn't on her floor.

 

I'm hoping she was either talking about someone else called Chris (I couldn't be asked to, well, ask) or forgot who was on her floor yesterday. If not, then at least it goes nicely with an incident from two weeks ago:

 

The only time we take a file to a floor other than the one we're assigned to is if it has "DJD" or "Urgent" on it. Otherwise, it goes into the basement for the relevant messenger. The aforementioned woman asked me what happened to a file she put out. I told her I'd look in the basement to see if it was still there, to which she said she'd written "Urgent" on it. She didn't. As though the satisfaction of knowing I'd done nothing wrong wasn't enough, another messenger told her about her mistake.

 

I've got an idea she doesn't like me much. :sly:

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I would'nt go as far as calling this guy an idiot cause im actually good pals with him but he said a very stupid thing today,

 

 

silly man:(talking to someone else) "i've still to watch that 12 rounds film with John Cena - everyone says its brilliant but i did'nt know it was WWE that made it so i put it off when i seen that"

 

 

me: why would that make you turn it off??

 

silly man: cause, i don't like WWE it's fake as fuck!!

 

 

 

There you have it - words of a man who only enjoys films starring REAL people telling REAL stories!!!

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So I had a few days off. During that time, I thought maybe it was time to give the idiot a fair chance and be more tolerant of her.

 

45 minutes into my first day back, however...

 

Maths for the insane:

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
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Apologies for the uber-bump, but she's back. With a vengeance. This is from a conversation on Tuesday and only now have I been able to compose myself enough to type it out.

 

How this conversation started is not a surprise, but almost 3 days later I still can

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..."Brilliant. What about leprechauns?"

"I don't know. I've never seen one"

"But you've heard of one. They must exist!"

"Well obviously they exist, I just haven't seen one. Like a shark"

 

that bit was the clincher for me, I haven't laughed like this in a while

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