Royal Rumble Reviews

[wandshogun09]

This thread is brilliant. Kudos to the reviewers. I've always loved the Rumble but I haven't seen a few of the later ones and this thread is making me consider working my way through the lot.

 

We must have more of these threads when Wrestlemania and SummerSlam time approach this year as well.

[PunkStep]

I hated the Hasbros which forced you into having matches with them still in their ring attire. Undertaker's hat, Hitman's shades, LOD's shoulder pads, DiBiase's fucking suit.

Well that's the strange thing, I didn't mind them wearing non-match stuff that much, apart from Undertaker and Mountie's hats. What a right pain in the arse they were. Didn't mind Piper wearing his kilt for the figure, not sure why when he was just as accessible as the jumping figures. The LOD shoulder pad spikes fell off just as quickly as the gorilla press action Warrior's fingers did.

 

Just remembered the worst figure- Skinner. Awful! His legs and waist were fixed, only his arm moved when you pushed his feet in! He was worse than the WCW figures! As a result, I didn't like Skinner.

[air_raid]

The LOD shoulder pad spikes fell off just as quickly as the gorilla press action Warrior's fingers did.

 

Just remembered the worst figure- Skinner. Awful! His legs and waist were fixed, only his arm moved when you pushed his feet in! He was worse than the WCW figures! As a result, I didn't like Skinner.

 

I was the only one of my mates whose figures suffered from neither loss of spikes or fingerlessness. I think it's because I didn't believe in SMASHING THEM INTO EACH OTHER BANG! BANG! BANG! as I witnessed one or two of them doing. Senseless. Guess I'd had too many Transformers disasters by then to know to play nice with your toys. Although the right arms of Jake the Snake and Hulk Hogan #4 did go very limp.

 

But yeah, Skinner, Warrior #3 and Gonzalez were crap for playability. Butch and IRS weren't much better, ruining many Money Inc/Bushwhackers title matches I had no intention of having anyway. I think in my loft the LOD vs Kamala\Bam Bam feud is still going on.

 

Just to keep it slightly Rumblecentric, I wonder if I'm the only one that was every privy to a Hasbro Rumble won by Damien?

[WWFChilli]

Just to keep it slightly Rumblecentric, I wonder if I'm the only one that was every privy to a Hasbro Rumble won by Damien?

 

Only, if you kept Damien long enough and didn't lose him. I used to have Mr. Perfect in both his yellow/blue figures so when he would be eliminated from a rumble, he would com back in later but nobody would notice because of his DIFFERENT COLORED OUTFIT!!!!

 

The sheer uber-heel logic of it.

[air_raid]

Only, if you kept Damien long enough and didn't lose him. I used to have Mr. Perfect in both his yellow/blue figures so when he would be eliminated from a rumble, he would com back in later but nobody would notice because of his DIFFERENT COLORED OUTFIT!!!!

 

Mine were a tag team. Blue was actually Mr Perfect, yellow I assigned a random "normal person" name to, and they were The Perfect Team. I forget what his name was, Mike something. They feuded with The Warriors. I concocted a risible imposter storyline to explain the pair of them, and never felt compelled to distinguish between Hellwig and the nameless "other one." My perennial tag team champions though were Terminator (when he wasn't moonlighting as Diesel) and battle damaged Terminator whose shirt I had painted blue with enamel paint, who in "stupid child nonsense" fashion, I decided were named Fox Mulder & Eugene Toombs. Which really doesn't make sense, were they wrestlers, the pair of them would never team up.

 

My typical pay per view schedule would usually work something like this :

 

WRESTLEMANIA

 

1. Razor Ramon pinned Tatanka after the Razors Edge (because you could do a good Razors Edge on the Tatanka figure, yes?)

2. The Undertaker pinned Virgil after seven chokeslams because it's fun to chokeslam Virgil and one Tombstone.

3. Legion of Doom beat Kamala & Bam Bam Bigelow. After the match Demolition challenged LOD for SummerSlam but LOD said no because they were busy.

4. Fox Mulder & Eugene Tombs beat The Warriors after interference from The Perfect Team

5. British Bulldog pinned Yokozuna after he POWERSLAMMED!!!1111 him.

6. Bret Hart beat Hulk Hogan to retain the WWF title belt with Ferrero Roche gold foil glued to it because the paint has rubbed off.

7. Macho Man pinned Shawn Michaels because I forgot to have their match earlier.

 

SUMMERSLAM

 

1. Legion of Doom beat the Nasty Boys and the Bushwhackers and the Natural Disasters all at once, because that's how better they are.

2. Razor Ramon pinned Texas Tornado after the Razors Edge (obviously)

3. Fox Mulder & Eugene Tombs beat The Perfect Team & The Warriors when Warrior #3 distracted Mr Perfect.

4. Hulk Hogan pinned Shawn Michaels. Shawn is Bret's homosexual nemesis, he never goes over.

5. Crush pinned Yokozuna after he POWERSLAMMED!!!!111 him.

6. Demolition beat Bam Bam Bigelow and his new partner Crush. Bam Bam doesn't like Kamala any more, and neither do I.

7. Bret Hart pinned Macho Man. Savage avoided the Sharpshooter on account of his legs being stuck together like Snuka and Koko, the genius.

[PSF]

My favorite Rumble still hasn't been covered. So if any (2002!!!) are still up for grabs, I wouldn't mind having a go.

 

Here's one of my fave moments from 1993. Randy what you doing going for a pin!!!

 

 

Credit to my son for helping/doing it for me.

[wandshogun09]

One of my favourite Hasbros for playability was the Bret Hart one. Was his the only Hasbro with that mold? Worst for me were the stuck together legs ones (Rockers/Snuka etc) and the headlock ones (Flair/Rude). Not a lot you could do with them. Steamboat's was shit as well. Legs stuck together AND a spikey thing on his head perfect for bashing your fingers on.

 

None beat the awful Ron Simmons Galoob for sheer cackness, though. Wasn't even wearing his wrestling gear and had one arm flexing and the other stuck to his belly. I used to just use him as a manager when I pretended Apollo Creed got a wrestling manager's license after his brilliant work getting Rocky back his 'Eye of the Tiger' in Rocky III. I ignored that he died in IV.

 

Back on topic, of the ones left, I'm looking forward to reading the write ups for the 93, 96 and 98 Rumbles. 2002 and 2003 as well. Get a move on whoever's got them.

[air_raid]

Back on topic, of the ones left, I'm looking forward to reading the write ups for the 93, 96 and 98 Rumbles. 2002 and 2003 as well. Get a move on whoever's got them.

 

I watched the '93 the other day. The only way I'm watching it again this calendar year (perhaps ever) is if my Cena doodle earns me that "honour" if it's one of the spares.

 

Strangely enough, 96, 98, 2002 and 2003 are the defining examples of the "really fucking obvious winner" syndrome I mentioned earlier. But I'm looking forward to those reviews too. 96 has some really good moments in, as well as the terrible inconsistency of Shawn Michaels being allowed to do what others weren't, such as Roddy Piper in '90, Undertaker in '93 and himself in 2005 and 2006, i.e. come back in after being eliminated by someone no longer/not participating.

[wandshogun09]

Heh. Yeah I haven't watched 93 in years but although I don't have all that fond a memory of it (Gonzales beatdown of 'Taker especially, seemed to go on forever) , there's enough to work with to get a fun review out of it if the right poster gets it.

 

The 93 PPV was a rare case for me of the undercard being better than the Rumble itself. Bret vs Razor is a bit underrated I think, Shawn vs Marty was good and it had the Steiners wrecking Beau & Blake.

[air_raid]

Speaking of wrecking, Marty's hangover is nearly as pronounced as Sherri's bosom.

[HarmonicGenerator]

I love this thread. Everything so far has been absolutely top class. Well done to everyone involved. I'd love to have a go at contributing and reviewing one of the 'spare' Rumbles, but as I'm a Mac person I don't have MS Paint, so instead I used Paint Online to create this Rumble moment. Hope it counts, otherwise I just wasted half an hour!

 

 

It's Santino preparing to hit Alberto Del Rio with the Cobra and almost win the 2011 Rumble, in case my mouseless drawing is worse than I thought.

[Jaffa]

That's class HG, looks ace.

[air_raid]

The edit was wholly unnecessary. Silky smooth.

[Bus Surfer]

I really love this thread. Many thanks to everyone that has contributed so far. Everything posted has been superb, and I've been inspired to watch a few of the Rumbles myself after reading their reviews. Great efforts from everyone involved... It's like Review-a-Wai, but in text and picture format.

 

Being a lover of the MS paint thread, I couldn't resist having a go myself. I'll leave the reviews to the funny people though.

 

[Hamboy]

The talk of wrestling figures makes me extremely happy. I had a Hollywood Hogan and Goldberg with magnetic(!) fists that broke within a couple of weeks. I think I had about 4 Stings as well - two crows, one Wolfpac, and an old school Sting. I didn't know that last one was Sting until I cleared my loft out several years later, as Surfer Sting was before my time. Assumed he was just a generic wrestler, like what you'd get in Poundland. On a similar note, I had a Honky Tonk Man too, but I just thought an Elvis toy had got mixed in with my wrestlers.

 

Here's one of my fave moments from 1993. Randy what you doing going for a pin!!!

Between that and his over the top rope dive at Jake in '92, I'm convinced Savage simply didn't know the rules of the Royal Rumble.