Glenryck Pilchards

Premier League

Arsenal 2-0 West Ham United
Bournemouth 2-2 Everton
Fulham 2-0 Burnley (Sunday 4pm)
Huddersfield Town 0-0 Cardiff City
Manchester United 1-1 Tottenham Hotspur (Monday 8pm)
Newcastle United 0-2 Chelsea (Sunday 4pm)
Southampton w/@Vegeta 1-2 Leicester City 
Wolverhampton Wanderers 1-2 Manchester City (12:30pm)

Serie A
Juventus 2-0 Lazio (5pm)
Napoli 3-1 AC Milan (7:30pm

Week 2 fixtures

Premier League

Brighton & Hove Albion 0-1 Manchester United (Sunday 4pm)
Burnley 1-0 Watford (Sunday 1:30pm)
Chelsea w/@TildeGuy~! 1-0 Arsenal (5:30pm) 
Everton 2-1 Southampton 
Leicester City 3-2 Wolverhampton Wanderers
Tottenham Hotspur 2-0 Fulham
West Ham United 2-1 Bournemouth

German Cup First Round
Erzgebirge Aue 0-2 Mainz (5:30pm)
Hansa Rostock 0-3 VfB Stuttgart (7:45pm)
Kaiserslautern 2-1 Hoffenheim (2:30pm)

Premier League

Arsenal 1-1 Manchester City (Sunday 4pm)
Bournemouth 2-0 Cardiff City
Fulham 2-1 Crystal Palace
Huddersfield Town 0-1 Chelsea
Newcastle United 1-2 Tottenham Hotspur (12:30pm)
Wolverhampton Wanderers 1-1 Everton (5:30pm)

Scottish Premiership
Heart of Midlothian 0-2 Celtic (12:30pm)

Ligue Un
Bordeaux 2-1 Strasbourg (Sunday 4pm)
Nantes 1-1 Monaco (4pm)

Romanian Liga I

Concordia Chiajna 1-1 Hermannstadt w/@RoryFice (4pm)

I am that hot I am seriously considering inserting a Mini Milk up my urethra.

Fucking hell, the legend nearly became reality.

Wrong way round!

It wasn't his fault.

Ridiculous fantasy booking ahead. 

Brock beats Cormier at UFC 229, Strowman comes down and rips the cage door off and cashes in. Strowman wins and the internet explodes. 

Damn right Butch. Nothing beats a local takeaway deal. Pizza Palace in Stockton does a 12" pizza, Large parmo and chips, Portion of donner meat, 2 tubs of sauce and 2 cans of pop for a tenner. Or for an extra 2 quid you can get 3 X 12" pizzas. They are proper meal deals.

Christ.

Memo Montenegro? Who was his tag-team partner? Facsimile Macedonia? 

@Frankie Crisp you are a bugger! I have been working on a World Cup of music since the draw has been made and I was going to launch it in May. 

Am I going mad? I am writing a wrestling quiz and I am sure in the past I came over a titbit that Bray Wyatt got his name from Stand by Me (If not that another Stephen King inspired film) where the radio announcer says "...and this song goes out to Bray Wyatt and his sister Abigail"

I have tried googling to confirm this and I cannot find anything. Have I completely made this up? I am looking at @Astro Hollywood to answer this after his brilliant dissection of the character on his blog. 

Dolph Giggler - Goes around laughing his tits off like Rustie Lee

Michael PT Hayes - Bad-ass gym instructor who eats a Scotch Egg from his bum bag whilst he is barking out orders.

Also paging @Max Power It looks like the ground is going to be soft and heavy in places so won't suit the usual candidates. I have lost track of the nags this season so I would like to know which horses like a mud bath. 

@W35ty Maybe it's a start of a breakdown?

I had a bizarre dream last night. I dreamt that I was walking down a seaside pier which had a garden running through it with trees, flowers and lawns. I stopped to take a phone call and I started sinking in the grass and i was saved by a reluctant Charlie from Casualty who looked like he had a face of thunder. 

One little fun bit in the Chamber was after Strowman eliminated Elias he shouted at him "Go home...... If you've got one" then proceeded to twat Roman. Great stuff. 

Speaking of bad tributes my local casino have had their fair share of terrible acts. The one that took the biscuit was a couple of years ago when I was playing in a poker tournament which is on the second level of the building.

The rest break was coming up so I decided to beat the rush and headed downstairs to the smoking terrace for a tab. When I got to the bottom of the stairs there was this odd looking bloke loitering in the dark under the stairs wearing a startling shiny pink shirt with a perm which was aided by Grecian 2000, a horrible goatee beard and a tan that looked like he was baking in a desert for about 4 weeks; he was glowing! The guy must have been in his late fifties, so I thought that is one hell of a mid-life crisis and thought nothing of it.

Once I finished my cigarette I headed back in side and there was a PA announcement of "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Mr Lionel Richie" the bloke I saw in the shadows wanders on to the stage and it is clear as day he was blacked up. His voice was shocking as well, I think the entertainment director got the sack for booking that gig.

There has been a lack of canine activity in the last couple of pages so here is my dog Murray, my human Matthew and myself.

10 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

Next you'll be saying you didn't know about the R in Streak.

I am donating just to up vote that.

I wasn't sure where to post this, but I think this topic is good as any. Today I have experienced probably the biggest amount of job satisfaction in my career. 

I work for a small mental health charity as a data officer so I don't really have any dealings with our service users other than saying hello and processing the data relating to them. Back in September my colleague was telling me that one of their clients was in great financial difficulty due to their child's DLA for ADHD had been completely taken off her due to her application form not been backed up with sufficent evidence. I looked everywhere to try and find support for the client, but the CAB had a waiting list of three months and there was no other organisation locally who could help. So without my bosses knowing I decided to take it on myself. 

I invited the service user in to get the full story. I typed up an appeal letter even though I was told it was hugely unlikely to be overturned as the client missed the appeal deadline by two months. The appeal letter was accepted by a tribunal and set a court date for today. We built a case which included 400 pages of documents. Before we even entered the tribunal the judge came out to inform us that they have decided to fully award the benefits to my client and back-pay fully from when it was suspended almost a year ago. I saw someone who had looked dejected every time I saw them to having one of the biggest beaming smiles on their face. They had spent the last year in poverty, having to go to food-banks to survive but can now live a relatively comfortable life. 

I am not kidding I am chuffed to bits for this person and I feel so rewarded for all the hard work I have put in to win this appeal. 

Jackie (2016)