Glenryck Pilchards

I have not told and I will not tell my friends about this, but I need somewhere to gloat. I have just won

I sit on the seat and stand up to wipe my arse, right handed with the toilet paper, flush the chain, pull the seat lid down, viola.

I think its beautiful that you finish your pooing ritual with a musical toot.

I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming!

I had a cracking day today. I backed the winner in the Ayr Gold Cup after a tip from another forum I frequent. I had

I have gone for an away treble of Rochdale, Aldershot and Leyton Orient. five quid stake for 150 smackers back. My mate has been compiling a form guide and he has had a couple of winners in already this season so hopefully this will come in as well. I have also gone for Sunderland, Liverpool, Villa, Everton and Swansea on five four folds.

Daniel Bryan

James Blunt

Not the best example of pictures but every now and then a quick glimpse of them you would think they are brothers.

England are now number one in the world at Test Match Cricket. Does anyone else feel faint with altitude sickness?

It shows how good we are now that we're already leading by over 100, with only 2 wickets down, against the top ranked team in the world (for about 2 more days) and there have been no comments on this test at all yet. Incredible stuff from Cook and Strauss, and Pietersen is looking imposing again today. Great times.

The way its going and with the strength of the tail-enders we could easily get 600+ I reckon they will bat this last session out and bat until 10 overs before close tomorrow, which will give us two days to bowl them out.

I am glad that the discussion has turned away from why these economically deprived people have turned to violence and destruction, as it is clear as day it is just greedy people trying to keep up with the Jones's. It's not looting, it's just deregulated shopping; it's free market ideology applied at its most basic level.

I have to say, if it turns out the police DID shoot him before he opened fire, then we're into a whole new ballgame on that side of things. The police were meant to have learned lessons from the De Menezes affair.

It doesn't though, if they asked him to drop his weapon repeatedly and he ignored their requests they have every right to shoot him. He could have pointed the gun in the direction of the police, that is enough of an act of agression for him to be shot. Who knows he might have been seconds away from pulling the trigger, just the marksman beat him to the punch.

I have been watching Sirens recently on channel 4 and it has a couple of laugh out loud moments in each episode. Fonejacker's Kayvan Novjak is one of the highlights of the show playing Rachid Mansuar.

The show is based on a Paramedic team in Leeds and follows each character in and out of work, it also follows two police officers and a fireman. If you liked Teachers chances are that you will like this.

I have done my ridiculous start of the season bet where I pick a team from the four English leagues to win there relevant division on an each-way Lucky 15.

I have went for Liverpool, Middlesbrough, Preston NE and AFC Wimbledon. If the Scousers finish in the top two and the others finish in the top three, I pocket a cool

The simplest solution to the binge drinking problem is to stop supermarkets serving alcohol and only allow purchasing of alcohol in an off-licence, public house, bar or club. The pricing at supermarkets are at ridiculous levels, take for example my local Sainsbury

If you have not had chance to catch up on the news today, Ken Clarke is getting a right kick in from the media and the opposition. He was on Victoria Derbyshire's show on 5Live and dug himself in a rather deep hole talking about rape and that there is different categories of rape.

I hate the Tories, but I do have some time for Ken Clarke as usually he speaks a lot of sense. Personally I thought the point he was trying to get across was correct but his choice of language was not the best and he is now getting shat on from all directions. I don't think he will be in post by the end of today; if you get verbally twatted off the awful Victoria Derbyshire then you might as well wave the white flag.

I bet Armando Ianucci is rubbing his hands at the moment as this could be a perfect episode of The Thick of it.

Edit Psygnosis beat me to the punch.

I have had a tip from a reliable source for the 3.50 at Goodwood, Desert Shine.

Currently the best odds you can get on it is 6/1, earlier in the day it was 12/1. The odds are tumbling down.

The guy I got the tip from has given me two winners in the last couple of weeks. I have stuck

Andy Gray and Richard Keys favourite lineswoman Sian Massey gets her back door smashed in by Cardiff full back McNaughton

I have been considering joining a cricket club this summer, but how much are you looking at for the cost of equipment and how much equipment do you actually need? I assume the necessities are bat, pads, helmet, box, shoes and whites, is there anything else I would need?

It must look mental to non-fans when a not-out decision is appealed and it shows it hitting the stumps (sometimes full on) and remains not out, I think they are still too half-hearted with the technology. In Tennis with Hawk-eye if a ball is given out but is shown to just be clipping the line then it's reversed, I lnow it's slightly different but it's the same technology.

I understand where you are coming from but the flight of a tennis ball and a cricket ball are totally different. Scientists are still trying to work out how reverse swing works and why it only happens in certain conditions. I am no scientist (although I am sporting a Professor Brian Cox type hairstyle at the moment) but I believe that it is easier to predict where the ball will land on the surface, like a tennis baseline than it is predicting a ball to bounce up to a vertical object.

Can someone explain this appeal system to me? Why is it that sometimes when the Umpire's 'not out' lbw decision is appealed, and the footage shows the ball clipping the stump, the umpire still sticks to his original decision?

As good as it is Hawkeye has not got 100% accuracy all the time, so if the ball is only just clipping the stump in its simulation it then goes on the umpire's original call. If the bowling team make a referral to an LBW decision, if it clips the stumps then it is not out, if it is lower down then the decision will be reversed. If a batsman has been given out for LBW and refers to the TV umpire and Hawkeye shows it has clipped the stumps then he is given out. If it is missing the stump completely then the decision is reversed.

I hope that clears it up for you!

Does anyone on here use Bet Fair ? Can someone please answer me this question ? How come I can't seem to withdraw money that I have won from the site ? I recently set up an account and deposited

Who voted for Guy Garvey? Out of everyone in the celeb world I am surprised someone has voted for him. I am very disappointed Piers Morgan didn't make the list I had him quite high up on my nominations.

Its the start of Cheltenham today, has anyone placed any bets? I have whacked

A memorising, or should I say mammorising commercial from China.

How come they use White ring ropes for RAW? I know it's only a little thing but I much prefer the red ropes, and they are associated with RAW, so seems odd they now use shitty White ones. The red ropes still appear on PPVs now and again but not RAW

Because Vince liked the look of the white ropes on NXT, so gave them to Raw instead. I want to know why they got rid of the black ropes for the big PPVs when they went HD, they always looked ace.

I could be way off here but the possible reason is that the white ring ropes make a clearer picture in the ring on HD television.