Glenryck Pilchards

Week 15 fixtures  
UEFA Nations League

Albania 1-1 Scotland (Saturday)
Czech Republic 2-0 Slovakia (Monday)
England 2-1 Croatia (Sunday 1pm)
Italy 0-1 Portugal (Saturday)
Northern Ireland 2-0 Austria (Sunday 5pm)
Wales 1-1 Denmark (Friday)

Africa Cup of Nations qualification (various groups)
Guinea 0-2 Ivory Coast (Sunday 5pm)
Morocco 2-1 Cameroon (Friday 7pm)
South Africa 1-1 Nigeria (Saturday 1pm)
Togo 0-1 Algeria (Sunday 4pm)
 

I had no idea @Astro Hollywood was a Geordie....

 

 

That photo of Big Ass is mesmerising. It looks like there is a Malteaser balanced on the top rope

Week 14 fixtures 

Premier League

Crystal Palace 0-2 Tottenham Hotspur (5:30pm)
Manchester City 0-0 Manchester United (Sunday 4:30pm)

FA Challenge Cup First Round proper

Aldershot Town 1-2 Bradford City
Bromley 0-2 Peterborough United
Ebbsfleet United 2-0 Cheltenham Town
Exeter City w/@Grecian 1-1 Blackpool 
Maidstone United 1-0 Macclesfield Town
Metropolitan Police 0-4 Newport County

La Liga

Atlético Madrid 3-0 Athletic Bilbao (5:30pm)
Celta Vigo 1-2 Real Madrid (Sunday 7:45pm)

Premier League
Arsenal 1-2 Liverpool (5:30pm)
Cardiff City 0-1 Leicester City
Chelsea 3-0 Crystal Palace (Sunday 4pm)
Everton 1-1 Brighton & Hove Albion
Newcastle United 0-2 Watford
West Ham United 0-1 Burnley
Wolverhampton Wanderers 1-2 Tottenham Hotspur (7:45pm)

Serie A
Fiorentina 1-2 Roma (5pm)
Udinese 2-0 Milan (Sunday 7:30pm)

Austrian Second League
Austria Klagenfurt w/Fog Dude 1-1 Guntamatic Ried (1:30pm)
 

Premier League

Brighton & Hove Albion 1-2 Wolverhampton Wanderers
Burnley 0-1 Chelsea (Sunday 1:30pm)
Crystal Palace 0-2 Arsenal (Sunday 1:30pm)

Fulham 2-3 Bournemouth
Southampton 1-0 Newcastle United

 
National League South
Billericay Town 1-1 Dulwich Hamlet w/@Stinky Dad

La Liga
Barcelona 3-1 Real Madrid (Sunday 3:15pm)

Ligue Un
Olympique de Marseille 1-1 Paris St Germain (Sunday 8pm)

Major League Soccer (Sunday 8:30pm)
New England Revolution 2-0 Montréal Impact 
Vancouver Whitecaps 1-2 Portland Timbers
 

When you go to the pub and ask for a Coke and they reply "Is Pepsi alright?" 

Of course it fucking is just pour me a bloody drink. Even worse some of the chain pubs now don't do full fat Coke or Pepsi now due to the sugar tax. For some ungodly reason Diet and Zero sugar versions of Cola give me crippling wind and I refuse to drink them because of it, so if other pubs are going to continue this trend they are only going to encourage me to drink drive. 

The best white chocolate bar is the Nestle White Crunch. It's a glorious bar but hardly any fucker stocks them.

Unfortunately I have to give up my first boy Murray as he cannot be trusted with my one year old. Earlier this morning he snarled and went for my son and slightly caught his cheek. This is the second incident in the space of three months and I cannot risk a third time happening. 

It is with a really heavy heart that we have to do this. He is a great placid dog normally, but cannot cope with a boisterous toddler. I am hoping a member of the family or a close friend can take him in, if not he will have to go back to The Dog's Trust. We got him as a two year old in 2010 and it is going to be really weird not to have him about, but I don't want my little one to be scared of dogs or worse to be disfigured for life. 

Week 11 fixtures 

Premier League

Bournemouth 2-1 Southampton
Chelsea 0-0 Manchester United (12:30pm)
Huddersfield Town 0-4 Liverpool (5:30pm)
West Ham United 1-2 Tottenham Hotspur

FA Challenge Cup last qualifying round
Dunston UTS 0-2 Gateshead w/@FailedPromoter (12:30pm) 
Harrogate Town 2-1 Wrexham

Scottish Cup Round 2
Cowdenbeath 1-1 Clyde
Stirling Albion 0-1 Queen's Park

Ligue Un
Nice 2-0 Olympique de Marseille (Sunday 8pm)
Strasbourg 1-1 Monaco (7pm)

The one time I don't back Gibraltar.....

Week 10 fixtures 

UEFA Nations League

Armenia 1-0 Gibraltar (Saturday 5pm)
Bosnia-Herzegovina 2-0 Northern Ireland (Monday 7:45pm)
Ireland 1-1 Denmark (Saturday 7:45pm)
Luxembourg 3-0 San Marino (Monday 7:45pm)
Netherlands 1-2 Germany (Saturday 7:45pm)
Spain 0-0 England (Monday 7:45pm)

Africa Cup of Nations 2019 qualifying (Groups B & F)
Comoros 0-3 Morocco (Monday 1pm)
Liberia 2-1 Congo (Sunday 5pm)

CONCACAF Nations League
Bonaire 0-5 Jamaica (Sunday 9pm)
Puerto Rico 2-0 Martinique (Saturday 9pm)

 

I hate to go all @Fog Dude on you Fog Dude but is it the Democratic Republic of Congo or the Republic of Congo?

Just had dinner at a restaurant in Fethiye, Turkey and on the next table was Michael Buerk. The temptation to shout the 999 theme was overpowering.

Week 9 fixtures

Premier League

Fulham 2-2 Arsenal (Sunday noon)
Leicester City 2-1 Everton
Liverpool 2-0 Manchester City (Sunday 4:30pm)
Manchester United 1-0 Newcastle United (5:30pm)
Southampton 0-2 Chelsea (Sunday 2:15pm)

Championship
Bristol City 1-1Sheffield Wednesday w/@MVP RULZ (Sunday 1:30pm) 
Norwich City 2-1 Stoke City

La Liga

Alavés 0-3 Real Madrid (5:30pm)
Valencia 1-1 Barcelona (Sunday 7:45pm)

A Primeira Liga
Benfica 2-1 Porto (Sunday 5:30pm)
 

All games kick off on Saturday and at 3pm unless stated.

 

Week 8 fixtures
Premier League

Arsenal 2-1 Watford
Chelsea 0-2 Liverpool (5:30pm)
Everton 2-1 Fulham
Huddersfield Town 0-1 Tottenham Hotspur
Newcastle United 1-2 Leicester City
West Ham United 0-2 Manchester United (12:30pm)
Wolverhampton Wanderers 2-0 Southampton

National League North

Darlington 1-0 Stockport County

Serie A
Juventus 2-1 Napoli (5pm)
Roma 0-0 Lazio (2pm)

All games kick off on Saturday and at 3pm unless stated. 

Is there any Ice Hockey on when you are in NY @HarmonicGenerator? It will be easier to get Rangers tickets, plus in my opinion Ice Hockey is far more entertaining than basketball. 

I don't know if this is still the case ( I went in 2004) but there was plenty of scalpers hanging around MSG and Penn Station for a Knicks match. It maybe worth going down 20 minutes before tip off to see if you can get a cheap ticket, if not there are plenty of sports bars nearby to catch the game. 

This thread inspired me to have a chippy tea last night from one of the oldest chippies on Teesside, Oxbridge Fish Bar.

 

Don't let the name fool you as they are all thick cunts round there and probably have not been within 1 mile of a university. 

Here is the menu:

Not a fucking kebab in sight as it should be. The only exotic things on the menu are haggis and cheese savoury which I believe is Cheese Coleslaw sandwiched between two potato slices, battered and deep fried. I've never tried it but if anyone is intrigued I am happy to sample it for the benefit of the UKFF. 

 

In the end I bought 1 Cod, 1 Large Sausage, 1 Large Chips, a portion of Fish Bits, 1 Large Mushy Peas and a can of shandy

The wife had Cod and Chips:

 

And I had Large Sausage, most of the Fish Bits (Young Pilchards and the hound had the rest) chips and mushy peas. Washed down with a nice cold can of Ben Shaw's shandy. 

 

It was fucking divine. 

Week 7 fixtures

Premier League

Arsenal 2-0 Everton (Sunday 4pm)
Brighton & Hove Albion 1-2 Tottenham Hotspur (5:30pm)
Cardiff City 0-3 Manchester City
West Ham United 1-2 Chelsea (Sunday 1:30pm)

Scottish Championship
Falkirk 0-1 Dundee United
Ross County 1-1 Inverness Caledonian Thistle

German Bundesliga
Eintracht Frankfurt 1-2 RB Leipzig (Sunday 5pm)
Schalke0-2 Bayern Munich (5:30pm)

Eredivisie
PSV 1-1 Ajax (Sunday 3:45pm)

Austrian Bundesliga
Wacker Innsbruck 2-2 Admira Wacker (Sunday 1:30pm)

Week 6 fixtures

Premier League

Bournemouth 1-2 Leicester City
Chelsea 2-0 Cardiff City
Everton 3-1 West Ham United (Sunday 4pm)
Huddersfield Town 1-1 Crystal Palace
Manchester City 4-2 Fulham
Newcastle United 0-1 Arsenal
Tottenham Hotspur 2-2 Liverpool w/@Briefcase (12:30pm) 
Watford 2-1 Manchester United (5:30pm)
Wolverhampton Wanderers 1-0 Burnley (Sunday 1:30pm)
 

Ligue Un
Toulouse 1-2 Monaco 7pm

At one of my former jobs we kept a black book of funny names that we came across. Ones that spring to mind are:

Max Gold

Hugo Prime

Iva Fuchar-Bell

Dr Din Dong

A girl from the street I grew up in recently married to become Harley Marley.

There was also a near miss when my friend Catherine decided to call of an engagement a few years ago. If she went through with the marriage she would have gained the surname Founde. I was planning on putting posters on lampposts saying "Cat Founde, ring this number"

I wish I had discovered that the Danish team is full of ringers a little bit earlier.....

St kitts and Puerto Rico should be 1-1. Damn fat fingers.

Week 5 fixtures

UEFA Nations League Denmark 2-0 Wales (Sunday 5pm) England 1-1 Spain (7:45pm) France 1-0 Netherlands (Sunday 7:45pm) Liechtenstein 1-1 Gibraltar (Sunday 7:45pm) Northern Ireland 2-1 Bosnia-Herzegovina (2pm) Scotland 1-0 Albania (Monday 7:45)

Africa Cup of Nations qualification Group F

Kenya 0-2 Ghana (2pm) CONCACAF Nations League

Montserrat 0-2 El Salvador (11pm) St Kitts & Nevis 1-+ Puerto Rico (Monday 1am) US Virgin Islands 0-5 Canada (Sunday 9pm

The nosebleed starts early this season!

 

Week 4 fixtures

Premier League

Burnley 0-1 Manchester United w/@ultimo the great (Sunday 4pm) 
Cardiff City 0-2 Arsenal (Sunday 1:30pm)
Chelsea 3-1 Bournemouth
Leicester City 1-3 Liverpool (12:30pm)
Watford 2-2 Tottenham Hotspur (Sunday 4pm)

Scottish Premiership
Celtic 2-0 Rangers (Sunday midday)

La Liga
Celta Vigo 1-2 Atlético Madrid (3:15pm)
Real Betis 2-3 Sevilla (Sunday 7:45pm)

Second Bundesliga
Dynamo Dresden 0-2 Hamburg (Midday)
St Pauli 1-2 Cologne (Sunday 12:30pm