Paid Members LaGoosh Posted March 15, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted March 15, 2012 In a similar vein to The Simpsons one-liner thread that started recently let's do a South Park one because atleast South Park has pretty much stayed pretty consistant in quality while the Simpsons has been shite for 10 years now. Â I'll get started: Â "If a killer put a knife to my throat, and said, 'Have sex with your father or else I'm gonna kill your mother while having sex with you,' I would have sex with myself." Â "What seem's to be the officer, problem?" Â "STAN DARSH!" Â "That road leads to Conifer. You want to go to South Park, you've got to go down that road. Course, I ain't never seen anyone go up that road. Six years ago a group of campers went up there and got lost, had to eat each other to stay alive. Used to be the way to the O'Reilly house. He butchered over fifty children and kept their bodies in his cellar. You should find an old bridge about halfway up; that bridge is cursed, you know. They built it with the bones of two hundred Chinese laborers who were massacred in '34. Yap, lotta history on that road." Â "And the Pope said, quote, "A chick bleeding out her vagina is no miracle. Chicks bleed out their vaginas all the time." " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Justice Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Cartman to Butters (well, Margarine) - You aren't there to have fun you black asshole. Â That line was so unexpected, it made it twice as funny. I actually fell on the floor laughing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CurryAngel Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Cartman after watching Aliens in Cat Orgy: "Hooray! Yes. I'm gonna have your and your boyfriend's voices on my Speak and Record bear, and then you'll mostly never babysit me again! Mostly." Â Randy in Stanleys Cup: "Remember Stan, win or lose... Those are your two options win..or lose" Â Randy from Two Days Before the End of Tomorrow: "Global warming starts two days before the day after tomorrow... Oh my god, that's today!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Justice Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Randy - No, this is just ectoplasm from the ghost. Did you see that ghost? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KFR42 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Cartman: "If dolphins are so smart, how come they live in igloos?". Mr. Garrison: Well, I Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members chokeout Posted March 15, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted March 15, 2012 Cartman: By the way, I should tell you that I haven't had a chance to shower while making my way up here. My balls are...........extra vinegary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members LaGoosh Posted March 15, 2012 Author Paid Members Share Posted March 15, 2012 I'm gonna get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus, feel his sticky salvation all over my face Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pinc Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 'The only Mexican guy I recall bought toasted tarts and chips and... we don't allow Middle Eastern people in the store.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spotlightmagnet1 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 I was going to put the Garrison 'Five days' line. Oh well, plenty more: Â Goth kid: 'To be a nonconformist all you have to do is wear what we wear and listen to the same music we do.' Â Jimmy to Wendy after she dumps Stan: 'Wendy, Stan says you're a cont....a cont... a cont... a cont... a continuing source of inspiration' Â Butters Dad: 'You shouldn't be scared of ghosts Butters. You should be scared of super-AIDS.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Foale Posted March 15, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted March 15, 2012 ...THEY TOOK OUR JEEEEEEEERBS!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wrasslin Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 FLAME ON! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawz Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 Detective Yates: "You're right. We're sorry. This is serious. We need to track this student down and... give him his "Luckiest Boy In America" medal right away." Cartman: I don't believe it. She's using the Mel Gibson defense. EA Sports Boss: Now let's part with that old EA Sports saying: Get the fuck out of my building. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KFR42 Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 World of warcraft executive trying to figure out how to deteat their greatest player: "But how do you kill that which has no life?". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiffingtonClyro Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 "Your son doesn't happen to be an alligator, does he?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickin it wit the kliq Posted March 15, 2012 Share Posted March 15, 2012 "Trent Boyette is a liar sir" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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