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This Will Never Be Forgotten


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I have been thinking about whether i hold any specific grudges against other people or places and here is why.

I was talking to my mum this morning, she's amongst other things a big boxing fan and we were talking about the Wardley v Clarke fight coming up on Sunday. As you do the conversation spread out to more general boxing and she returned to one of the boxers of yesteryear that she absolutely fucking hates. Joe Bugner. 

Now you may be thinking that's where the grudge part of this comes in and you'd only be sort of right. It turns out that my mum and dad had a bet before the Bugner v Ali fight in 1973, my dad bet her £1 that Bugner would be World Champion during his career and she bet he wouldn't. My dad never paid up on that bet. Even after Big Frank battered Bugner in 1987 my dad wouldn't pay, saying that Bugner still might make a comeback, which he did in 1995 fighting 9 times over the next 4 years so he still wouldn't pay up even though he was fighting nowhere near World Title level. His last fight as it turns out was in June 1999 but more importantly my dad lost his fight with lung cancer in September 1999, still having not paid up. 

Now they say you shouldn't speak ill of the dead, but my dad was a cunt. He did loads of horrible shit in his life, some of it to my mum and they were long divorced by the time he died. She holds no grudge against him for any of that, not the lying, the infidelity, the thieving, the list goes on and on. The only thing she cares about was that he didn't pay the £1 for Joe Bugner, it still makes her genuinely angry. 

I don't think I hold that kind of hatred in my heart for anyone, though perhaps there are a couple of people who might bear a grudge against me. One thing I am reasonably sure of though is that there are folks here who might hold a grudge. Does anyone want to get it off their chest? It might make you feel better, or it might reinforce it. 

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I haven't spoken to my Mum for over 15 years.

She's never met my children and never will, and while I don't hold any malice or hate towards her (after having had therapy for years I let go of all that negative energy, its not good for the soul) and actually feel sorry for her on a human level, I do not care if I never see or speak to her again.

She didn't even come to my sisters funeral last year. 

And to top it off, she lost all my childhood and teenhood football shirts!

 

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Sorry to hear that, Bacon. Until I was 16 my family was very close. Then my oldest brother ran away with a woman he met in a chat room and left his wife and then 4-year old son behind. This was in 2000 so he was probably a bit of a trend setter pre-Friends Reunited. Thankfully my nephew was and is still very much a part of our lives. 

I have one other brother and two sisters, all older than me with the closest being 12 years older. My sisters no longer really speak, although I'm close to both as is my brother and we are all very close to my mum. The maddest thing is the reason they no longer speak is so long ago and was very much a heat of the moment thing, but they've never let the grudge go. 

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1 minute ago, MungoChutney said:

Sorry to hear that, Bacon

Thanks pal, but don't be. 

Rather not have negativity like that in my life.

Everyone's family and path is different isn't it? Luckily I have a fantastic stepmum and my other sister had a wonderful mother in law who more than made up for it.

Like I said, on a human level, I hope she's OK, and now I'm older I understand her past better and what she went through, and I sympathise (she is an alcoholic) but she's not part of my life, never will be, and I'm cool with that.

And to be honest, I'm not sure I even hold a grudge anymore.

It's not like she's Sol Campbell, who I will obviously hold a grudge against until the day I die :)

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Well I’m pretty pissed off that I can’t make ‘I shagged your mum’ jokes anymore so the off chance you do run in to her tell her I said thank you very much in a very sarcastic tone.

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This is gonna be one of those threads that I think about posting in loads of times and then, eventually, when I'm absolutely in the right/wrong mood to do so, go for it. Stay tuned?

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15 minutes ago, Mr_Danger said:

Well I’m pretty pissed off that I can’t make ‘I shagged your mum’ jokes anymore so the off chance you do run in to her tell her I said thank you very much in a very sarcastic tone.

Nah, fill your boots!

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My Uncle’s wife holds a massive grudge against all our side of the family for the most pettiest of reasons, that being my Nan and Granddad throwing him a welcome home do when he came back from the Falkland War in the early 80s when she wanted his attention to herself.

It’s stretched as far as my generation being punished by not having any relationship with our cousins for over 15 years (and by proxy the eldest’s young son not mixing with my cousin’s and sister’s kids) as she and they never came with my uncle to family events, in fact the last time we actually saw my aunt was at my dad’s funeral 8 years ago

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