CracktonMoj Posted July 21, 2008 Author Share Posted July 21, 2008 Oh, and the two remaining shitarses for today will be put up this evening. These three are for you to wake up to. Have a nice day~! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D.Carter Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 (edited) 34 - Mike MendozaHere's a guy that runs to the ring much like The Ultimate Warrior, but at least the Warrior had a character and some rope shaking traits to fill in time once he got there. Mendoza spends most of his time in the ring standing around like a lemon. A very camp lemon. He's a charisma vacuum who can't sell or work. He botches all his moves, and he just does bad, pointless and random tech. Why does he feature on telly? Is it because Jon Ritchie uses the promotion to advertise his shit Dropkixx trainees? Is it because Sanjay Bagga fancies guys with a tan? Who knows?Totally agree with this post, add to it that he wrestled like a heel when he was a face, and the fact that he has been wrestling for TWELVE YEARS, makes his shitiness all the more shocking. And the answer is yes to all of the questions posed at the end of that post. Neither Ashe nor Brookside should be on a shitarse list, a "can't be arsed" list would be a more appropriate one. Shame really as they both still have alot to offer. Edited July 21, 2008 by D.Carter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members bAzTNM#1 Posted July 21, 2008 Paid Members Share Posted July 21, 2008 33 - American All-StarUCW mainstay dresses like a baseball player. That's it. Has no other redeeming qualities. Is able to be in the most awkward position in threeways on an almost constant basis. Constantly tries high risk offence, high risk in this sense meaning 'high risk of failure'. Sort of grasps the idea of having your moves match your character, as in he does a baseball slide and a windup punch, but does them badly with no sense of timing or knowledge of when to use them. Just plain bad.That is so Rob Feinstein under that gear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobby dazzler Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 33 - American All-StarUCW mainstay dresses like a baseball player. That's it. Has no other redeeming qualities. Is able to be in the most awkward position in threeways on an almost constant basis. Constantly tries high risk offence, high risk in this sense meaning 'high risk of failure'. Sort of grasps the idea of having your moves match your character, as in he does a baseball slide and a windup punch, but does them badly with no sense of timing or knowledge of when to use them. Just plain bad.Does this guy also wrestle as a Clown, Kimchee and a Kangaroo? A British Steve Lombardi tribute? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CracktonMoj Posted July 21, 2008 Author Share Posted July 21, 2008  32 - Special Agent  The most generic heel there has ever been, who's attempts to shout at the crowd for no reason result in giggles and other assorted laughter. It goes without saying that he's skinny, pale and pleather clad. Shouts 'SHUT UP ' at the crowd when they're being silent, because he doesn't understand how wrestling works. Runs a promotion called East Anglia Wrestling, who have, to date, only run shows in Northamptonshire. Which isn't in East Anglia. Every strike he does looks like it kills his opponent, in a bad way, but then anything he does that resembles a hold... well, only just resembles a hold, as it's so very, very weak. Does moves apparently at random. Bumps with his arms down first, meaning he's gonna break something at some point, and constantly gets tangled up in the ropes while doing so.In short, go ahead and imagine 'Generic Shitarse #72' and that's Special Agent. Oh, and he trains people... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CracktonMoj Posted July 21, 2008 Author Share Posted July 21, 2008 (edited)  31 - Dirty Oil  A failure at life.  Despised by all of those around him, it doesn't take a genius to figure this shitarse probably paid his way onto shows. Fat, out of shape, never been trained and should never have been anywhere near the ring, at any time, ever. Compulsive liar. Worked security at 1PW shows until he was caught red-handed stealing DVDs - but told everyone he volunteered to 'step back from the business' because he 'wasn't enjoying it any more' and was 'worried about getting too close'. Has been known to walk out after shows to chat with fans seconds after an injury angle. Also appeared as Dragon JU-A and Maniark briefly. A complete stereotype of the worst kind of person attracted by British Wrestling. Oh, and for his one appearance, someone who hated him made this theme music, which he used while not realising what the lyrics were:  Dirty Oil theme  If your PC is a shitarse, it's on Sendspace too  This was his entrance music, that he used on the way to the ring. It includes the lines 'I can't wrestle, everyone knows/so I pay money to be on shows'. That's the best line, but there's some others. Did I mention it's Diesel's theme with a rap over the top? Click that link, everyone.  EDITED TO ADD PIC AND SECOND MUSIC LINK Edited July 21, 2008 by CracktonMoj Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nowinengland Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 ahh, we need a pic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ok tne. Gaping_Gash_of_Joy Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 Dirty Oil themeThis was his entrance music, that he used on the way to the ring. It includes the lines 'I can't wrestle, everyone knows/so I pay money to be on shows'. That's the best line, but there's some others. Did I mention it's Diesel's theme with a rap over the top? Click that link, everyone.Someone MUST have the video clip of that. That would be GOLD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fireball Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 Dirty Oil themeThis was his entrance music, that he used on the way to the ring. It includes the lines 'I can't wrestle, everyone knows/so I pay money to be on shows'. That's the best line, but there's some others. Did I mention it's Diesel's theme with a rap over the top? Click that link, everyone.Oh.My.God.That is the most horrible piece of entrence music that i've ever heard. Even if he was a fantastic wrestler, he would deserve this spot in the list just because of that song. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwailofilms Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 someone who hated him made this theme musicSomeone with no discernible musical skill either, seemingly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CracktonMoj Posted July 21, 2008 Author Share Posted July 21, 2008 (edited) I'm pretty sure it was intentionally bad.Fireball, you may have missed the point a bit. It was an intentionally bad song, with lyrics burying him as a shitarse, and he didn't realise and happily toddled off to the ring with this playing. Edited July 21, 2008 by CracktonMoj Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silvera2006 Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 Good lord, thats dreadful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ronald Mcdonald Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 LOL that theme is the most shittest brilliant thing ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toga Posted July 21, 2008 Share Posted July 21, 2008 (edited) Dirty Oil:Edit: Picture removed.. Moj got it squared away now Edited July 21, 2008 by Toga Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Mike Castle Posted July 21, 2008 Paid Members Share Posted July 21, 2008 Moj, seeing as you seem to be posting these rather quickly... why not just post them as and when? That way rather than forcefully dragging it all out, you can just post them when you're able.I only say this because for "todays" entries, you posted a bunch at stupid o'clock in the morning, said the rest would be up this evening, and have already done so mid-afternoon. Sounds like you're as desperate to add them as everyone else is to read 'em. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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