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Richie Freebird

Funniest phishing attempts

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I advertised my PS3 on the Friday-Ad website, yesterday I had an email from someone who asked if it was still available to which I replied 'yes'. I then got this reply.

 

Ok.thanks for the reply.I am buying it for my kid cousin in Africa for Christmas.I will include the shipping cost in my payment.if it's ok with you send you account details so I can make a secure bank transfer payment tomorrow.

 

Bless. He thinks I'm stupid.

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Yeah, I went through a stage of messing with people like that on Gumtree. Often people would put up ads for flats that don't exist, trying to get you to put down a deposit (via Western Union) without having seen it. I replied to one saying I was interested and ready to make a deposit, but wanted to first make sure that it had a billiard room (this was a 1 bed flat in Cambridge by the way) and most importantly, a spunk-trench. unsurprisingly they came back saying that it did indeed have both of those. I tried to get them to take pictures but the trail went dead. Presumably they put spunk-trench into Google. I don't want to know what they found.

Edited by Burchill's Buddy

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You can at least get the records of the location the money was picked up from, even if it needs a subpoena, but that doesn't have any bearing on the zero per cent change of getting it back. The Western Union former HQ is very close to where I work, and I saw a scary documentary about it being the physical hub of the Eastern seaboard. Which means that if someone blew up the massive stores of fuel oil (6 floors) stored in the building, it could go up like an immense bomb.

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I sent a reply back to him saying it would be cash on exchange only. His retort?

 

Yeah but we can not see and exchange cash for the item because I am currently on an official trip to turkey.i assure you,you will receive your bank payment as promised...

 

My reply.

 

What a coincidence, I will be travelling to Turkey myself on Monday. I can bring it with me and we can meet at the airport to exchange. What do you think of that Tony me old cocker?

 

Oh yeah, his name is Tony Drake.

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Just a tip if you get telemarketing calls all the time then I reccomend registering on this site - http://www.mpsonline.org.uk/tps/index.html

 

Havent had a telemarketer calls since!

 

Is that the same sort of thing that BT offer? You can sign up for a service via most phone companies that blocks you off various phone call lists .If they do call you, you have the right to sue them for something along the lines of

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Just a tip if you get telemarketing calls all the time then I reccomend registering on this site - http://www.mpsonline.org.uk/tps/index.html

 

Havent had a telemarketer calls since!

 

Is that the same sort of thing that BT offer? You can sign up for a service via most phone companies that blocks you off various phone call lists .If they do call you, you have the right to sue them for something along the lines of

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I dont know the in's and outs of it but I went from getting at least 1 telemarketer call a day to none so I assume it works

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Nowhere near as funny as Birchills missive, but I got the phishing phone call from the "Windows Security Team" today, who were kindly telling me that my computer was riddled with a virus, and they would guide me step by step.

 

The obviously asian woman who introduced herself as "Kate Smith" was very insistant that my computer was going to "Blow up" if this was not solved. I kept her on for about 20 minutes, telling her that I had to look at my computer in a different room, and to see how low she would sink, told her that "the delays because i have trouble getting my wheelchair through the door", but the callous cow carried on insisting that she was looking after my best interests.

 

I asked her what she thought of the pedestrionisation of Norwich centre, whether felching should be an olympic event and if a cannibal man eats another man, does that make him a gay. She was focused on the virus though.

 

I asked her how long she had worked for Microsoft, and she said that she worked for windows. When I asked her if Steve Jobs was still the owner she said yes, and that she had recieved extra training from him this morning to sort this particular matter out.

 

I closed the conversation by asking her to stand while I played the national anthem on a kazoo, and she hung up half way through. Unpatriotic bitch is that Kate Smith.

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