A Short Film for comments/mocking

[Gatso]

Really enjoyed it. I had no idea how it was going to pan out so made you want to watch from start to finish.

[Carbomb]

The blonde actress was a bit annoying

 

I'm pretty sure that's how she was supposed to be - they make a big deal of it at the beginning. I thought she did a bloody great job.

 

And on a completely sexist note, she has a great figure.

 

I understood her character, but her voice was annoyingly painful on my ears.

 

Again, though, I think that's part of it - she's a pretty good actress, she's put together all the elements needed to portray an annoying character.

[Dirty Eddie]

I have another short film up on Vimeo, if anyone happens to be interested. Only 7 minutes long, and another submission for my Degree...

 

"Sean"

 

It's a bit of a downer, to be fair, so don't watch it after any heavy drinking.

[IANdrewDiceClay]

Really enjoyed it. I had no idea how it was going to pan out

Urrghhh!

[Dirty Eddie]

Oh Christ!

 

Talk about attracting the wrong crowd!

[King Pitcos]

Just had a watch of Sean. I'm not a great fan of it, I'll try to explain why. This might not be particularly helpful but there's something about it that seems very "student film" to me. Partly the subject matter (fairly unoriginal idea, which is fine, but it's not explored to an interesting degree -- this is something I'm sometimes guilty of as well), partly the way it was shot and cut. There were too many bland wide-ish shots that felt a bit flat or not interestingly framed, but it might have been there just wasn't much going on. It was better in a lot of ways than the stuff I made at university, mind.

 

I never identified with him or felt anything for him while he was making the tea or reading the book, for example. The shot at 05:50 when he's sat on the bed is good, but the next shot should have been a closeup of his face rather than the alarm clock, I think. I'd have included more closeups just to try to engage the viewer more. The music made it seem like I was supposed to be engaging with him, but nothing in the video helped that. The pottering around the house, the walking to/from work, it all felt a bit distanced and that didn't work for me when the actions themselves weren't interesting.

 

It was a bit of an odd mish-mash of genre/style as well. First the interview video, and the narrated walking. It felt a bit like a TV documentary, which made me expect some talking head stuff or something. But the narration being from the doctor threw that off. The majority of it, with no interaction between Sean and the camera/crew or anyone else (like seeing him at work, for example), didn't feel like a documentary. Or anything, really. Then the dream sequence/flashback stuff was more interesting because there was actually dialogue and because of the work done to those sequences in post. But it seemed very different from the kind of film it was at the start.

 

Ultimately, I just didn't feel anything for the character, and that's the first port of call for me. Unless there's some sparkling dialogue or something extraordinary happening to hold my attention, I need that connection with the character. I hate most shorts, to be honest, because most shorts are (at best) a good idea not executed to its fullest. Feel free to take any of this on board or just dismiss it as the ramblings of someone who hasn't got a clue what they're on about (which is probably true anyway).

 

Plus he made the tea wrong. Milk on a fucking teabag?

 

I've not watched Head Case yet, but I think I've heard good things about it.

 

Edit: The main thing I'd have changed, assuming the story is to stay the same, would be to include more closeups. Just get us closer to the protagonist. I'd consider splicing bits of the video interview throughout, as well, to break up the tea/bed/walking monotony rather than using it as bookends.

[Dirty Eddie]

I appreciate the feedback from anyone who takes the time to bother, so thanks.

 

The main thing that let the film down, for me, was that it ended up having to be edited down in length hugely. The first cut was about 12 minutes and it had to come down to around 8 for the Degree submission. That's a shit load of time in such a short film so I completely agree and understand that you didn't 'feel' the character.

 

Essentially I started out with the idea of attempting to make a very different film to our last "Head case", so I moved away from any comedy elements completely.

 

I got pretty good feedback at the viewing from my tutors so I'm still pretty happy with it. The shoot style (with static camera positions and the character moving through frame) was intentional, but fair enough if you didn't like it. We have pretty much no access to tracks/dolly equipment so other than freehand shooting we are a little limited. With the 'dream' scenes being point-of-view and free-hand I wanted the other scenes to look as different as possible. Plus we had a nightmare filming the outdoor shots and they had to be done super quickly as some arsehole security guards were threatening to call the Police.

 

But yeah, i'll stop blabbing now.

 

thanks for the input.