King Coconut

More of a poach-up. 

I'd much prefer the current voice than 90 minutes of itsa fucking meee-a. 

Some of my favourites are Five Deadly Venoms, One Armed Boxer and Mad Monkey Kung Fu.

From Jackie you need to see Project A! Armour of God also gets a thumbs up from me.

Honourable mention for Ninja Terminator, which is so terrible that it's excellent.

Can't let the passing of Eddie Butler go without comment. He accompanied me during some of the sporting highlights of my life. Godspeed, sweet prince 😘

@Astro Hollywood playing a blinder shocker!

Here's hoping Richie gets a bit of Her Maj's Vag in heaven.

3 minutes ago, Nexus said:

Archbishop of Canterbury

Apparently he spent the day praying for Liz. Shit god, that one.

54 minutes ago, Wideload90 said:

Nobody will forget where they were.

I will.

1 hour ago, Nostalgia Nonce said:

I hope the Queen doesn't go just yet. I've only just sorted my commemorative plates and can't be arsed rearranging them so soon.

My nan pulled this shit three times before she actually did one.

It's clear that we're all sick of the hate in this world when a kebab shop tea is getting waved through in a flurry of likes. 

Some great poo talk in the new mission.

I'll bet he's never had fish and chips and has never been into anything that I'd call a pub.

There was never any danger of them selling out the stadium so I think they're quite right to be fleecing the die-hards.

11 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

Don’t know why this one always reminds me of our Handsome Butch, but it does. 

That's Butch's Stairway to Heaven.

2 hours ago, HarmonicGenerator said:

any tips will be appreciated

Watch someone better.

15 minutes ago, Hannibal Scorch said:

No. Because it was a situation they were put in, not caused and they thought they were doing the right things. It was an accident you absolute cretin.

Nobody comes into possession of a large pond full of koi accidentally. It is a conscious decision to take over responsibility. A person who has spent years building up to it also develops the knowledge needed to spot such issues before they become a problem. 

I've said everything I've said out of a deep passion for animals and don't much like your tones, you pricks. 

11 minutes ago, Accident Prone said:

Great example of a false equivalence here. Get to fuck.

The phenomenon of people thinking "can't be that hard" and jumping in over their heads with pets, then learning the valuable lessons by killing them isn't new, or restricted to koi. 

11 hours ago, Hannibal Scorch said:

Fixed it

Tell me this, Oscar fucking Wilde. Would you feel any differently if it were labrador puppies and a ventilation pump? 

5 hours ago, deathrey said:

I'm not sure if this is the right place to put this but the fucking hot weather 😡  We have a rather large Koi Carp pond at our new house (moved in on May) so we are somewhat novices at looking after them and whilst we have tried to do everything we could, the hot weather caused some deoxygenating of the water and the overnight on Monday our pump packed in. We woke up to total carnage on Tuesday morning, 10 of them have died. We still have 14 left and are doing what we can to make sure they all survive but the hot weather has really done a number on them and it'll be touch and go for the next few days.  I'm so gutted. I can barely bring myself to look out of the window at the pond after Tuesday mornings scenes.

I know you don't want to hear this but, if you're novices and jump straight in with a rather large pond and 24 Koi Carp and have no idea what you're doing, you're directly responsible for their presumably torturous deaths and should be banned from going near any other animals in the future.

The Catholics were paedos when the paedos that were on the telly were just choirboys.

10 minutes ago, Loki said:

But I have to feel some sympathy for Sadowitz, it’s not unreasonable for him to think that decades of acclaimed work might buy him some leeway and provide him with audiences who will give him the benefit of the doubt.

Surely that depends entirely on what he said. I wasn't there and don't have enough information to judge him but surely it's possible that he overstepped the mark.

2 hours ago, Tommy! said:

I'm not sure of the full correct term, perineum or taint,

Round my way that's the gooch. Thanks for the clarification.

3 hours ago, Tommy! said:

push up behind the scrotum with two fingers

What, up the bum?

4 hours ago, Rule One said:

I can't remember who brought it up but did anyone do the double Multiple-Taps?

YES! We were 9 mates renting 3 flats in the same building and we spent most of our time with the all tanks cheat on Micro Machines destroying friendships. Now and again we'd also have a BYO Telly session, link up all of our PSXs and destroy friendships in Doom. Great days.

Is there no mention of it in your contract?