A Mania match a day

[air_raid]

Oh right! I had no idea. So was he meant to come in to break up the pinfall? And (sorry for all the questions) was anything made of the fact Sid did kick out of the legdrop, i.e. did they use that improvisation to their advantage at all?

 

They made fuck all of it. Sid was facing a steroid-related suspension anyway and quit/was sacked (depending on who you ask) three weeks later, a grand total of 2 matches into his run with Warrior.

[HarmonicGenerator]

Ha, I see. I'm learning all sorts thanks to this thread, cheers raid.

 

 

 

Seeking another procrastination break from a report I'm having to write, I'm moving into double figures with WrestleMania X and Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon. My first Michaels match of the project, and the first Ladder Match - or gimmick match generally - as well.

 

The match:

 

Two belts hang above the ring, and I notice we've got another new commentary team. Vince McMahon and Jerry Lawler now.

 

"There are no rules" says the ring announcer, before explaining the rules. Er.

 

Ah! Shawn Michaels' music! You know what, I think this might be my favourite theme of them all. It's iconic, you knew you were about to get a good match when you heard "oh! oh! Shawn!" Great piece of music. Diesel's accompanying him to the ring. Razor Ramon out next, and his silhouette looks fantastic coming through the Madison Square Garden entrance way. Bring that set-up back for NXT, I say, I bet they could do something like that for Full Sail. How good would Finn Balor look coming through an entrance like that?

 

Anyway, this match has had classic status for as long as I can remember. It was put over massively in the commemorative WrestleMania X-8 book I still have somewhere as one of the best matches ever. I've not watched it for a few years, so I hope that I still enjoy it in this modern era of annual MITB and TLC matches. It's quite novel to have a Ladder Match that's for a belt and only has two people in it.

 

They start off with some nice reversal, Michaels does a flip and ow! Chokeslam-style move from Razor, I'm counting that as a chokeslam, that's two for the project so far. Clearly it's not a proper chokeslam though as Shawn's up pretty quickly to hit a neck breaker. They're going at an incredible pace here, it's a bit of a change from Crush vs. Doink and Hogan vs. Sid, I can tell you.

 

Diesel clotheslines Razor on the outside, and the referee's acting all angry about it, but there's no rules, Hebner mate, there's nothing you can - oh wait, he's just sent Diesel out. I'm not sure he has the power to just make up rules in a 'no rules' match, but for some reason Diesel's listened to him and gone away. This gives Razor the advantage, and Shawn does his flippy-flippy turnbuckle thing, walking into a BRUTAL looking clothesline over the top rope.

 

Razor lifts up the protective mats on top of the concrete floor, and then back in the ring, he hits a BRUTAL BRUTAL BRUTAL right hand. He goes for the Razor's Edge but Shawn back body drops him over the top onto the concrete. That looked sore. This is pretty hardcore… I was going to say 'for WWE in 1994' but even by today's standards you'd still think 'that'd hurt'. As if to prove my point, Michaels just did a baseball slide into the ladder, which went straight into Razor's gut. It's always really clever how they can use the sound of the ladder to put the emphasis on the pain it inflicts - my rational brain knows the noise came from Shawn's feet, but you hear that clatter and see Razor double over in pain and the noise is associated with it. 

 

Anyway, that's a terrible tangent. Shawn's using the ladder to major advantage here, with a couple of gut shots and then some nasty shots to the back. Lawler points out that he's not using the ladder to climb to the belts, he's using it to destroy Razor. Which is a clever idea by Shawn. He sets up the ladder and starts climbing, Razor grabs his foot, then the tights, we get an UTTERLY gratuitous Shawn bum shot, and then he hits a Bare-Arsed Elbow Drop off the top of the ladder. Vince says he's never seen anything like this in his life. You're not wrong, Vince.

 

Razor's out, and Shawn sets up the ladder, climbs the turnbuckle onto the ladder, his arse has been put away again now, and THERE IT IS! That iconic splash off the ladder. That's one of the moments that's kind of indelibly burned into your memory as a wrestling fan. It's magnificent, and could only be made better if the reaction wasn't just Vince saying "unbelievable" a few times with mild surprise.

 

One more fall off the ladder by Michaels later (that's three so far, Shawn really did go for it in this match) and they have a mid-ring collision and are both out. Another iconic shot from the ladder's-eye-view of them both laid out. Great stuff.

 

Michaels is up first, and he's leaning the ladder in the corner. He goes to whip Razor into it, Razor reverses, FUCKING HELL, Shawn crashed into the ladder over the top to the floor, OUCH. Razor takes the ladder outside where he hits Shawn across the back with it a couple more times. It goes to show you don't need loads of unprotected head shots to make things look brutal, there've been none in this so far, they really were unnecessary.

 

Catapult into the ladder! Razor takes it back into the ring now, and there was a headshot, but Michaels did get his hand up at least. Razor goes to climb up and Shawn LEAPS FROM THE TOP ROPE into Razor on the ladder! Christ! That's one ladder fall for Ramon so far to Shawn's three.

 

They're both climbing up now, Shawn gets to the top first. Razor's punches are things of beauty. OH! Shawn just got chucked from the top of the ladder and that bump looked horrible, his body just goes 'thump' on the canvas. No give whatsoever. Horrible. 4-1. Razor goes back up and Shawn manages to muster the strength to dropkick him off the ladder, 4-2. That ladder does not look safe at this point, it's all bent and unstable. It also goes to show you don't need twenty odd ladders to make a ladder match entertaining, one's enough because you've got to fight over it, you can't just go and get another.

 

Michaels hits a big piledriver (side note: I love how the piledriver is now so protected, if it ever gets hit in a match today it is a MASSIVE thing) and climbs to the top rope holding the ladder and AAAAH ladder-assisted splash onto Razor! This definitely lives up to the billing as one of the best Ladder Matches ever, even if the Summerslam 95 rematch is considered better by some (I don't think I'm one of them, but that's beside the point).

 

Shawn gets crotched, his leg gets caught in the ropes, the ref doesn't give a toss, and Razor's climbing, he's going to do it! He does it! Ramon takes his third bump off the top of the ladder but this time with the belts in hand. What a match!

 

Huge ovation for Razor as he climbs the ladder one more time to pose with the belts.

 

My thoughts:

 

That definitely still lives up to the hype. Shawn and Razor do some mental things in this match, and I'd still consider it a standard-bearer for Ladder Matches. On the one hand, there was a focus on innovation and nutty moves, but they were definitely also doing it for the Intercontinental Title rather than trying to 'top' anything (though I guess that's an advantage of being the first match of that kind on a big show). We'll see whether the Intercontinental Title Ladder Match at WrestleMania 31 can be as good, and whether it'll still be as memorable after 20-odd years!

[Undefeated Steak]

Great review that. Really enjoyed reading it. Razor was the coolest, wasn't he?

 

"Hard work pays off, dreams come true. Bad times don't last, but bad guys do."

 

[air_raid]

I know this is such a stereotypical "everything was better in the olden days, modern wrestling is shit" remark, but can you imagine if, even ten years after WrestleMania X, they had a guy as popular as Razor, which such obvious merch-shifting potential, and so reliable at having consistently good matches, and him NOT getting a run with (one of) the World title(s)? Never mind today. Of course, with only one belt to aim for we might be edging away with the "everyone gets a turn if they're good enough" days, but still. I'm not sure whether this makes me sad that Razor never got his turn, or just happy that there at least was a time that you could have a guy as talented as him as "king of the midcard" i.e. the middle of the card having true superstars, and the top spots being so sacred.

[HarmonicGenerator]

Cheers Steak, very kind of you to say so. And yes, Razor was pretty cool, it's odd to think he was never really a main eventer in WWE.

 

I'm going to do a couple more Manias tonight, which takes me a bit ahead of schedule (21 days left), but seeing as I'm away next weekend and won't get a chance to watch anyway, it'll all even out.

 

So, that said, on to WrestleMania XI, where I've gone for Owen Hart & Yokozuna vs. The Smokin' Gunns. I very nearly went for the Lex Luger/British Bulldog tag team match, but it was against the Harris brothers, and I really didn't fancy watching the Harris brothers.

 

The match

 

Ooh, we get a spinny light-up WWF logo on the canvas at the start of this match. Cool.

 

I didn't realise Owen Hart's partner hadn't been announced in advance for this match. This is what you get when WrestleMania X-Seven was the first one you really paid attention to. (I was around for some of the early ones but couldn't have differentiated one event from another, it was all just WWF to me back then).

 

It's Yokozuna, anyway, obviously. He's got Jim Cornette and Mr Fuji with him, but I can't tell whether the crowd aren't that fussed or the music's just really loud. Cut to a backstage interview between Vince on commentary and the Gunns. This is for the Tag Team titles. Bart didn't do very well.

 

The lighty-up effect is showing a picture of Owen Hart now. I like the lighty-up thing, bring that back.

 

Billy Gunn does not look right with a tache. They get some pyro. Lighty-up-update: a star, for Texas presumably. 

 

The Gunns' mullets are hideous. Yokozuna's gonna maul them both though, so it's okay. At least, I assume that's what's going to happen. Yoko waves the Japanese flag for some boos. He's fucking MASSIVE.

 

Billy and Owen lock up, Owen does a bit of cheating and gets the requisite heat, bit of an exchange, Billy clocks him, and big cheers. Bart tags in and Owen does some lovely technical stuff before tagging in Yoko who takes full control until he misses an elbow. If he'd hit that Bart would have been squashed. Squashed. He wasn't, which is a shame. I don't like Bart Gunn.

 

Owen back in, hip toss and arm drag from Bart, and is that Mike Chioda with a mullet? The Gunns double-team Owen, then double dropkick Yoko through the middle rope. For someone so huge, Yokozuna's surprisingly mobile. Frequent Gunn tags are doing a number on Owen. I think that is Mike Chioda with a mullet. He's been around ages, hasn't he?

 

Owen does the Hart-first turnbuckle bump. The Gunns have got some cracking double team moves, there was that back suplex/neckbreaker combo that I think was a Dudleys move a few years later, then a side slam/fameasser-sort-of thing, looked very cool.

 

My laptop has taken to autocorrecting 'suplex' as 'duplex'. It's very fucking annoying. I'm one of the minority of people for whom 'suplex' is not only a word, but a word used frequently. Fucking stop it, autocorrect, you're not helping.

 

Back in the match, Yoko gets the tag in and leg drops the back of Billy Gunn's head. Huge reaction because his head should have been mushed from that. There will be no recovery, there can't be, that weight landing on you… but no, Billy's fighting back!

 

Evidence of the Chioda mullet:

 

 

Dreadful.

 

After a rest hold, Yoko picks Billy up but Owen accidentally dropkicks his partner! I can't remember who wins this one, at this point it could go either way. Bart gets the tag first, and press slams Owen, and then manages to take Yokozuna down! I did not expect this. Especially from bloody Bart. Billy in again, but Owen takes Bart over the ropes and Yokozuna with a belly-to-belly-to-Billy, "collapsing his lungs again" according to Vince. Again? I don't think that's something that should happen once, never mind 'again', Vince.

 

BANZAI DROP! Billy Gunn is dead. Bart breaks it up, but Owen was the legal man and takes a leisurely pin. New champions! Owen's reaction is priceless, he's absolutely thrilled.

 

Replay time. How does the Banzai Drop not kill people?! How?! "BANZAIIIII!" Yokozuna cries into the camera as we cut to … a blimp taking camera shots from the top of the arena. Oh right then. We cut to an interview with Bam Bam Bigelow - he was cool, was Bam Bam - and that's all from the new champions.

 

You know what? Both members of the winning team here are dead. So is Bigelow. . I need to start picking more matches where everyone's still alive. I might manage that by WrestleMania 14.

 

My thoughts

 

Standard tag match, to be honest. Owen post-match was great, Yoko looked a monster (but how could you not at that size), and the Gunns had some great double-team moves. I don't like Bart Gunn. I just don't like him.

 

Not much more to say on this, really. Couldn't go beyond 'standard'. But you know, tag title change, big name return, it's the sort of stuff you'd have on the Mania mid card quite easily.

[HarmonicGenerator]

WrestleMania XII time! I have chosen Ultimate Warrior vs. Triple H. I thought it would be cool to watch a vintage match with someone confirmed to be on this year's event (I'm remaining hopeful that Undertaker's not going to bother with Bray Wyatt, I'm just not keen on seeing him in a nothing-at-stake match like that). Taking into account the fact that Triple H is going to be fighting the other Blade Runner this year, how could I not watch this?

 

The match

 

This is the first Mania I've watched that has warned me of 'sexual content' before hand. And before I skip through to Warrior vs. HHH, I notice from the opening video package it's also the first year I've heard Gravelly WWE Voiceover Man.

 

Who is Gravelly WWE Voiceover Man, by the way? And why's he not in the Hall of Fame? Answers please!

 

I know he's Hunter Hearst Helmsley here, but I'm calling him Triple H anyway. Is that Sable with him? She looks like Sable. His music is awful, surely that sort of music will bring a crowd right down? Bring on the Warrior! 

 

It is Sable! Was this her debut?

 

Right, here we go. That entrance went on ages. Warrior's music hits, now THIS is entrance music. WARRIOR MASK PYRO. Where is he? THERE HE IS! HE'S RUNNING! FIREWORKS! COME ON WARRIOR! MULTI-COLOURED LIGHTS! He may have MORE FIREWORKS been a bit past it by 1996 but hell, I love Warrior, easily in my top three of all time, so I couldn't care less. This is going to be great.

 

Mullet Chioda's back. How long did he keep that thing for? Where's Brutus Beefcake when you need him?

 

Triple H blindsides Warrior before he's finished his entrance! To be fair, it was going on a bit, but he's not even taken his coat off yet. PEDIGREE?! HE JUST GOT STRAIGHT BACK UP! HA! HE'S TAKING HIS COAT OFF! That's unbelievable. Clothesline, clothesline, clothesline, Warrior's in great shape, BIG shoulder tackle, I'm not over that Pedigree no-sell, that was unbelievable. Press drop, big splash, goodnight. Didn't even hook the leg. Triple H was obliterated there, utterly utterly killed. If he can go from that to WWE Champion in three years then nobody can ever use 'being buried' as an excuse ever again, ever.

 

That's it. Done, except for a bit backstage with Triple H, Sable and a debuting (apparently) Marc Mero fighting backstage, but I've only watched that because I haven't pressed pause. Where's Warrior? I want more!

 

My thoughts

 

Yeah, that was a squash good and proper. Warrior is awesome, but that was ridiculously one-sided. Not even Sheamus vs. Bryan from 28 can compare to that killing (I do plan for that to be my choice when I get there, though, so we'll see how they do actually compare). How Triple H ever recovered from that is beyond me. He did, though, so I'm quite happy to say I loved it. If you're getting an Ultimate Warrior return then that's exactly what you want, and the Hunter Hearst Helmsley character and his terrible terrible music deserved nothing less, quite frankly.

 

Wouldn't it be hilarious if Triple H vs. Sting was a repeat of this match? Well, it wouldn't, really, but the internet reaction would be something.

 

(I still haven't pressed pause, and Undertaker is making his entrance now. I just want to say now that the Undertaker is my number 1 of all time, ever, and his entrance gives me goosebumps every fucking time I see it. How I wish I'll get the chance to see it live one day. He still shouldn't be fighting Bray Wyatt for no good reason, though.

 

He just turned the lights on. Fuck, he's cool. I'm doing the Chicago Street Fight tomorrow if I get a chance, but after that, I'm definitely having Undertaker vs. Kane.)

[HarmonicGenerator]

We inch ever closer to the Attitude Era with WrestleMania 13, where I'll be watching the Chicago Street Fight.

 

The match

 

Preamble: I haven't seen this match before. Don't know which Nation of Domination members are in it, don't know who wins, so this is an entirely new experience for me. I've been told it's good. We'll see.

 

It's weird seeing WrestleMania take place in an arena. Pretty packed arena, by the looks of it, but still, weird.

 

Right, let's have a look at the Nation. Two rapper blokes. Some guys in suits, one of which is D'LO FUCKING BROWN. Very tempted to watch whatever match he's in when I get to 15 or 16, just because it's D'Lo. Looks like Faarooq's going to be wrestling, and is that Crush? I think it's Crush. Yes, it is. I don't want to see a PlayStation blimp, I want to figure out who's in the bloody match.

 

Nope, too late, LOD's on their way to the ring. Ahmed's got the shoulder spikes on! And he's got a plank of wood! Crowd are loving the LOD. Ahmed's keeping his earrings in, that always struck me as quite dangerous when you're bumping around all over the place, what if it gets ripped out? I thought the same about Paige's bellybutton piercing watching her match from Raw the other week.

 

NOD just attacked LOD, and we got triple press slams for D'Lo and the rapper guys. Clarence Mason, don't actually remember him, he's been dealt with too.

 

Savio Vega? Oh, fuck, he's in it? I can't stand Savio. 

 

There's loads going on here! Bins all over the place! Ahmed went over the barrier! Hawk's got the plank of wood! FUCKING HIT SAVIO WITH IT HAWK. Nope, he missed. Faarooq's on the announce table. When did they change the announce tables from actual tables to the ones they use now? I'm trying to recall the earliest match I've seen which had the 'proper' announce tables. Big crash sound offscreen, camera missed whatever caused it entirely. Animal looked like he was going to piledrive Faarooq on the table, or rather through it, but held him upside down a bit too long and they just sort of both fell off. That looked a bit rubbish.

 

Off-screen again, Faarooq got hit with a fire extinguisher. Savio's dominating Ahmed because he's a twat. Aha, replay of the fire extinguisher. You know, if that was a real CO2 extinguisher, Animal's hand would have been freeze-burned to the part he was holding.

 

Anyway, there's bins everywhere, I love a good gimmicked bin and OOF Ahmed Johnson just slammed Faarooq through the table, that's how you do it. YES, Animal just clobbered Savio FOUR TIMES with a bin but for some reason Savio thinks that wouldn't hurt and carries on as normal. Christ. 

 

Savio's still fucking dominating Ahmed for some reason, and every time Vince says "Ahmed Johnson" on commentary I think he's saying "Old Man Johnson" and it then reminds me of that 'Old Long Johnson' cat video.

 

 

I think the cat's trying to say "Ahmed Johnson".

 

Where was I?

 

Oh, right, the match. D'Lo's trying to lynch Ahmed now, apparently. That's a bit off. Hawk gets the advantage with a double clothesline, and Crush comes in, kind of forgot he was in this match. It's bloody difficult to keep track of everything that's going on, I know you shouldn't choreograph these things or plan them out spot by spot but it seems like they don't know where to aim the cameras because everything's happening everywhere.

 

Faarooq's trying to hang Hawk now. I can't say I like that, I'm finding it hard to watch and not in a 'what a bastard Faarooq is' kind of way. It's really not pleasant. Hawk got out of it by flinging Faarooq from the second rope to the floor but the camera missed it. Oh, god, now Faarooq's in the noose, can someone not just take it away from the match? Sorry to go on about it but I'm really not keen.

 

WHY THE FUCK IS SAVIO VEGA STILL ACTING LIKE THE MATCH HAS JUST STARTED AND WHY THE FUCK DOESN'T AHMED JUST PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE. SAVIO WILL YOU AT LEAST ACT LIKE ALL THE OBJECTS YOU'VE BEEN HIT WITH HURT A BIT.

 

Oh, Ahmed's up, he hit Faarooq with a move while Hawk plays with the fire extinguisher outside. A real CO2 extinguisher wouldn't have had that many seconds of use in it. Ah! There's Crush again. They ran him into the plank of wood chest first and Animal pins him for the win, but the rapper guys and D'Lo get involved again straight away. Pearl River Plunge to D'Lo! Why couldn't he have done that do Savio?

 

Rapper guys up on shoulders and DOUBLE DOOMSDAY DEVICE! Now LOD can celebrate with Old Man Johnson, which they do.

 

My thoughts:

 

Didn't like that, personally. It was all over the place, and not in a way I enjoyed. The cameras missed loads of stuff going on, and most of what they did catch seemed arbitrary and inconsequential. I get that a Chicago Street Fight's supposed to be chaotic, but there didn't seem to be any structure to it, they mostly just hit each other with bins on the outside until they remembered how long they were meant to go and did the (not very exciting) finish. Apart from the parts with the noose, which, okay, it's a different world in 1997, but I really, really don't want to be watching attempted hangings in my wrestling. I felt uncomfortable watching those parts. Crush was barely in it, LOD weren't nearly as dominant as I was expecting, and mothershitting Savio twatting Vega was in it. I have a completely irrational hatred for Savio, I just think he's shit, and there was far too much of him in this match.

 

I'll not be watching this again.

[HarmonicGenerator]

Had a hell of a couple of days at work, so I'm hoping my choice for WrestleMania 14, The Undertaker vs. Kane will cheer me up a bit. 

 

The match

 

I always preferred the Inferno Match to this one, but that's not to say I don't like this as well. In fact, it was probably my favourite Taker Mania match until the Triple H one at XXVII. Or possibly the Batista one at XXIII. I forget.

 

One plus to it straight away: no Savio Vega. .

 

We do, however, start off with Pete Rose. He's talking about baseball. Hurry up Kane and do the Tombstone so we can get to the big brother vs. brother grudge match.

 

Here we go. Classic Kane music. BIG FIRE PYRO. And that's gotta be Kane! "Straight out of the mouth of hell", says JR, "and that evil, evil Paul Bearer". You know what, MORE FIRE, MORE FIRE, MOOOORE FIIIIIRE, he's not wrong. Kane is absolutely terrifying in this get-up. Here we go, here we go, arms raised, BOOF! TURNBUCKLES ON FIRE. Love it. I've really gone off Kane in the last year or so, but I'd always been a fan before then, and 1998 Kane is reminding me exactly why I liked him for so long. He got 15 years of goodwill out of me. That's not to say I think he should go back to it - it just wouldn't quite work anymore. But what a brilliant look he had back then.

 

Lights go out, and for the first time in this project, THE UNDERTAKER. Lighters on across the arena, and it's the druids! This is wonderful, it really is bloody wonderful. Undertaker is, and I've said this before, my favourite of all time, and 96-98 Teardrop Taker is the one I voted for in 'what's me best look' a little while back.

 

Gong. Instant goosebumps. Chills down the spines, down both arms, hairs on the back of the neck standing up. There is nothing, nothing, that will ever have the same effect as The Undertaker's entrance. Ever. It's one of the greatest spectacles in wrestling… no, strike that, THE greatest thing. HE TURNS THE LIGHTS ON WITH AN ARM GESTURE. It's glorious.

 

The storyline that JR and Lawler (who are great together here, JR's a hell of a lot better than he was in 93 at WM9) are explaining here is pure soap opera, and yet, it works, it's compelling.

 

Face off. There's another of your iconic WrestleMania images, and it's on the Lonely Road Of Faith package as well. Right hands from Taker, but Kane cuts him off with an elbow, Taker thrown into the corner with ease. Big boot, clothesline from Kane, Taker sits up. Basically they're just going to clobber each other until the finishers start, and that's fine by me.

 

Kane's body language is great here, I don't know if he gets enough credit for how he could get that over without any facial expressions. He's taken the advantage now, and Taker gets suplexed front first onto the ropes and there goes Kane from the top rope! He was bloody agile back then as well.

 

Speaking of agility, Undertaker just managed to jump up and land on Kane's shoulders, that was fantastic! Kane drops him down with considerably less grace, and on the outside, throws Taker throat first onto the railing and then into the steps. I believe we may be entering the obligatory outside-brawling stage of the match. Paul Bearer distracts the referee while Kane hits Taker with the steps. However, Kane drops the steps afterwards and they make a massive crash which sort of gave the game away. Silly Kane.

 

He hits Taker again - well, he's supposed to but he didn't really connect, Taker sells it anyway - and Bearer gets some stomps in before they get back in the ring. It's been all Kane so far, can you imagine if he'd won this and the Streak had been over at 6?

 

Taker builds up some momentum, running the ropes (at quite a speed I should add, these are two legit giants, and it's quite hard to remember that sometimes) and CHOKESLAM CHOKESLAM CHOKESLAM.

 

WrestleMania Project Chokeslam count: 3

 

Aaand time for a sleeper hold. Bearer taunting on the outside, what a perfect voice he had for the job he did. JR mentions Taker's past Mania victories, but they claim WrestleMania 8 against Jake was his first one… was Snuka a no-go name at this time? Or was it just JR getting it wrong?

 

Undertaker fights out of the hold, lots of strikes, didn't work, he gets clotheslined back down again. Kane crashes down with an elbow, and we're back to the sleeper. Taker looks quite knackered actually, but you must reckon Kane found it tricky to catch his breath with the mask on. Taker powers out and crotches Kane on the ropes, a big boot to Kane on the apron, he's on the floor and BLOODY HELL. Out of nowhere, the Taker Mania Dive, but Kane sidesteps and Taker (who got some massive height on it) crashes onto the Spanish announce table (which is the 'proper' announce table this year). That looked devastating - for the first time in the project, I think, I audibly let out an "oh my god!" when it happened. I'd post a gif, but I can't find one.

 

Kane hits a top rope clothesline but it wasn't enough. We're back to exchange of clobberings, but Taker gets Kane up for the Tombstone, Kane reverses, almost drops him, catches him in mid-air and Tombstones him. 1, 2, very quiet crowd which makes me think they must have expected Kane to win here, Taker kicks out! About half a second later there's a massive pop as everyone realises. Kane is not happy.

 

Taker, who's not visibly in pain but is kind of selling through fatigue, hits loads more strikes and then a chokeslam!

 

CHOKESLAM COUNT: 4

 

Tombstone to Kane, 1, 2, Kane kicks out. JR sells that massively, in disbelief that Kane kicked out of the Tombstone from Undertaker. Taker hits a gorgeous leg drop and then a second Tombstone and HE KICKED OUT AGAIN.

 

Paul Bearer is clutching his chest on the outside, which in hindsight is quite upsetting to watch. JR saying "he can't have a heart attack 'cause he doesn't have a heart" doesn't help.

 

Top rope clothesline from Taker, a third clothesline and a third Tombstone with a leg-hook pin, and it's academic, the Undertaker wins. The Streak is now 7-0.

 

There's stuff after the match as well, of course, Kane Tombstones Undertaker onto a chair. "I've seen wars between small countries with less intensity than this", says JR. And not for the last time at WrestleMania, Taker's left lying battered in the ring after he wins a Streak match. But unlike at 27, he sits up! He's struggling to walk out, but he manages it.

 

Afterwards, we get a lovely, lovely video package of old-timers like Freddie Blassie, Pat Patterson and Gorilla Monsoon. Check out WrestleMania 14 just to watch that. Can't spot it on YouTube, so if you're on the Network, skip to 2:07:00.

 

My thoughts

 

S'alright. I definitely still prefer the Inferno Match to this one, but it's got some great moments in it. The entrances are brill, the face-off at the start is, as I said, iconic, you should certainly watch Taker's dive because how he always managed to continue a match after that is beyond me, and the three Tombstones thing is a great way to defeat Kane while still making him look really strong.

 

As a match, it starts off really well, slows quite a lot, but picks up at the end. Not either man's best, but perfectly watchable.

And it's got two chokeslams in it. Two!

[PunkStep]

Really enjoying these HG, keep them up!

[HarmonicGenerator]

Cheers PunkStep!

 

Powering on through the Attitude Era with WrestleMania 15, and sorely tempted as I am to go with D'Lo Brown's match purely because D'Lo, I am going with the four way match for the Intercontinental Title, Road Dogg vs. Ken Shamrock vs. Goldust vs. Val Venis. My reasoning is (1) my nostalgia sense has me believing Shamrock was brilliant and I'd like to see whether I got that wrong, or if I'm right in thinking he's great, (2) Goldust might get on the card this year so it'll be nice to see him in a previous life, and (3) if you're looking for a representation of Attitude mid card in one match, you can't get much more representative than Val Venis, Road Dogg, Goldust and Ken Shamrock.

 

Also, I've not seen this one before so it's all new. I like a good mid-card four-way match too. I'm all set to enjoy this. Don't let me down, 1999.

 

The match

 

The Network hasn't split WrestleMania 15 into chapters for some reason. That's weird.

 

OH YOU DIDN'T KNOW? YOUR ASS BETTER CAAAAALL SOOOOOOOMEBOOOOOOOOOOODY! YOU DAMN RIGHT! Shut up, Michael Cole. It's your first WrestleMania and you're annoying me already.

 

It's fantastic how everyone in the crowd knows every word of Road Dogg's spiel. And I'd be quite happy if they keep bringing the New Age Outlaws back for a match every so often.

 

Oh, SLEEEEEEEAZE. Val Venis' music is just pure sleaze. Here he comes. You know what, today's mid-card would kill for a match with four proper characters like this who are all really good besides. Goldust and Val Venis are both great in-ring, Road Dogg's got the charisma, and Ken Shamrock's got that aura about him.

 

Heh, so Val gets a little mic time too. Does everyone get that?

 

Okay, this is a Four Corners elimination match. Cool. I like an elimination match, too.

 

Goldust is next out and he's gone widescreen. I know the Stardust match as Fast Lane was disappointing but I'd love Goldust to get his wish and get a singles match at WrestleMania. He's earned it.

 

Shamrock! His music's fucking great. And he looks quadruple tough. All three challengers in the match are previous IC champions.

 

We kick off straight away with Goldust and Shamrock, and Dogg and Val, brawling. Shamrock and Dogg team up against Val, then Shamrock clotheslines Road Dogg down. Every person in this match has a clear, well-defined, identifiable look. I really like that.

 

Tim White's the referee! Is that wise?

 

Nice dropkick from Road Dogg and Goldust gets a tag in to hit a spinebuster. Good move from Road Dogg, let the other three eliminate each other. Lawler and Cole are talking about the night in Rio 20 years ago when Pat Patterson first won the Intercontinental Title. Ha.

 

Val Venis in now, and it's worth mentioning Goldust's got Blue Meanie and Ryan Shamrock in his corner. Val reverses the Curtain Call into a lovely spinebuster. Meanie is taunting Shamrock about Ryan. I wouldn't do that, Meanie, Shamrock could kill you with a look.

 

Meanwhile, Goldust tries for a superplex but falls off the ropes, Venis hits a bulldog from the turnbuckle, kickout. Nice Fisherman's Suplex and another kickout. Bit of a crotch connection and Shamrock comes in to kill Goldust with a DDT. Ouch. Road Dogg hits Val with one as well. Tim starts counting to 10, both men are eliminated if they don't get up in time, Goldust gets up just in time and covers Venis but he kicks out. Shamrock's distracting the referee and Road Dogg's using that to his advantage.

 

Did I just hear the crowd do a "whooo!" when Road Dogg did a chop? I don't know why but I always thought WWF crowds only started doing that when Flair came back in 2001.

 

Shake Rattle and Roll for Val, same for Goldust, and the shaky knee drop for Shamrock. Road Dogg is popular. He's left-handed, Road Dogg, I always forget that. He does some posing on the turnbuckle but Venis hits a back suplex for a two. LOADS of moves in this. Pumphandle slam for Val and Shamrock tags in by smacking Road Dogg on the back of the head.

 

BEAUTIFUL take down into the Ankle Lock, which to my mind is one of the greatest submission finishers ever. Especially the way Shamrock used to do it. And Angle for that matter. And to be honest Swagger's not that bad at it. it's a fantastic move anyway. 

 

Shamrock's outside now, Val's following him for a brawl in the aisle. Obligatory outside-brawling bit and Tim's counting to 10. Shamrock sprints back to the ring but only just doesn't make it. So they're both eliminated. That was stupid. Ken destroys Goldust and Road Dogg in the meantime but that was deflating. Made Shamrock look a right loser for getting in at 10 1/2. I suppose he tried, at least, Val Venis just seemed to disappear. Oh! Road Dogg did a move and a pin and won. Goldust's shouting at Ryan Shamrock, it must have been her fault. How long was she around for?

 

Oh, I see, she was trying to grab Road Dogg's leg but a reversal meant she grabbed Goldust's leg instead. That's even more stupid than what male Shamrock did. Was it not obvious she was grabbing the wrong leg? Oh well. Road Dogg won but I don't think we even saw him or the title after the bell rang, the post-match was all about Goldust. 

 

My thoughts

 

Yeah, that was fine. What I love about it is the characters - you could watch that match not knowing any of them and instantly get who was who, they were all so distinctive. In the match itself, I was surprised by how many MOVEZ they were doing. The eliminations were disappointing, you could have just as easily done a one-fall-to-a-finish and had Shamrock and Val brawling on the outside to miss the winning pin, it would have made no difference to how the match played out but wouldn't have made the two of them look like idiots for not getting back in time. Road Dogg seemed to be the right winner.

 

 

 

 

WE'RE HALFWAY THROUGH! 15 WrestleManias down, 15 to go!

[HarmonicGenerator]

I'm still doing this! i've just been very busy the last few days. But I'm getting back on the WrestleMania horse with WrestleMania 2000 and Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho. I'm intrigued about this one, mainly because I haven't watched a Benoit match in years, nor have I had any desire to. I don't know how I'm going to react - or if I will react at all - to watching him now.

 

Anyway,

 

The match

 

So this is a two-fall triple threat match for the European and Intercontinental Titles, but each fall is for a different title? Attitude~!

 

Oh, hang on, I can't find it on the chapter selection. This is odd.

 

Aha, here we are. Found it. Is that a Benoit thing, then? Not advertising his matches in the show menus?

 

First fall, IC title, second fall European. Got it.

 

Jericho is out first. Big pyro, big reaction. This is the first match in ages I've watched where all the competitors are making their Mania debut. Tights Jericho is better than trunks Jericho. There's a thread for you - wrestlers that lost some of their aura when they started wearing trunks.

 

There are so many signs in the crowd. That's definitely an Attitude thing.

 

Heck, here's Benoit. I liked his first music. I know this was seven years pre-Incident but it's still weird to watch him.

 

Angle! His music is marvellous. Kurt was marvellous, it's amazing how little I care to watch him now - or any time since his first matches with Samoa Joe. Come back Kurt.

 

The match is on. So after the first fall, the winner is the Intercontinental Champion, then the match just keeps going for the European. Jericho just did the Hart chest turnbuckle thing then chucked Benoit out of the ring. Jericho in control now, he was going for the springboard dropkick but Benoit caught him, and the crowd's surprisingly quiet. Jericho dropkicks both other guys and gets a cheer, looks like he's going for a dive - turned out to be a baseball slide, that would have definitely been a tope these days. Flapjacked into the steps by Kurt and then a belly to belly on the inside, Angle's belly to bellys were tremendous. I realise I'm talking about Angle in the past tense and that's wrong, and yet...

 

Jericho's chest is reeed raaaa from Benoit chops, he went to the top rope and Benoit chucked him all the way to the announce table on the outside, he hit it but didn't go through. Benoit now suplexing Angle all over the place, I forgot about that snap suplex he used to do.

 

The crowd really are quiet here. Angle then suplexes Benoit and this is definitely the wrong match to have picked since my laptop insists on autocorrecting the word 'suplex' because there's been fuckloads of them. Benoit now chopping Jericho into the corner, heard some 'wooo's for sure there.

 

Jericho puts a camel clutch on Benoit, so I guess you can win by submission here as well. Stalling suplex by Jericho on Angle, drops him back down to no reaction at all. This really is odd, nostalgia had told me 2000 crowds went mental for everything but they're absolutely not.

 

Loads of pin attempts where the third man breaks it up but none of them are especially convincing - I don't think this would be bad to say on this forum but the Cena/Lesnar/Rollins triple threat, the last match of this kind I watched, was LOADS better than this.

 

Benoit hit the top rope headbutt after chucking Angle into the crowd - and that was a bit cringey, because he's essentially just jumping onto his own head there. He got the first fall! And immediately tries to pin Jericho again for the second, which was clever but I don't know if JR and King noticed it.

 

Angle and Jericho both on the turnbuckle now, Benoit joins them and hits a back superplex, they're both hurt (Benoit's clutching his head so, again, cringe) and ANGLE MOONSAULT. I wouldn't know if he still does that in TNA, I kind of hope he doesn't for his own sake, but my goodness did Kurt do a beautiful moonsault. Missed this time though. 

 

Just realised we didn't really see Angle react at all to losing the Intercontinental title.You'd think he'd be more annoyed. He's in control now - but not for long, as Jericho takes control again. SHHYYYYYAAA Powerbomb, and…. then another one! Here comes Benoit with the Germans, three of 'em but Angle breaks it up. Full nelson suplex into a pin on Angle, which JR calls a German, and there's your ref bump!

 

Benoit gets Jericho in the Crossface and he taps out but the ref is out of it. If I was Benoit I wouldn't have broken the hold to go and check on the referee, but then I wouldn't have murdered my family either so what do I know.

 

Angle whacked Jericho with the belt, at which point the ref (Tim White) conveniently wakes up but Jericho kicked out. JR points out we've seen a lot of suplexes in this match, which we have. Benoit misses a top rope headbutt (cringe) and gets hit with a Lionsault straight away, 1 2 3, Jericho's the European champion!

 

NOW Angle is annoyed. He's distraught in fact. It's a bit weird to think, in one way he lost twice in his first WrestleMania, but on the other he managed to lose twice without ever being pinned or submitted. All the attention is on Kurt post-match, so in the end it was his story despite Chris n' Chris walking out with the belts.

 

My thoughts

 

Straightforward triple threat despite the complications of the titles - lots of moves, but not a lot to grip you particularly. Looking at those three names you'd have expected an utter clinic but I suppose this wasn't the era for that - put this same match on three years later and they'd have probably gone twenty minutes and had a "this is awesome" chant. Is that better? I don't know.

 

Benoit-wise it was okay. I didn't feel too strongly about watching him again either way - though it really is hard not to wince when you see him landing on his head, because you know where it's all leading.

[HarmonicGenerator]

And now I move to WrestleMania X-Seven. This is the first WrestleMania I watched properly from start to finish, so I have very fond memories of it. I think you always judge subsequent Manias by your first one, which is a double-edged sword. Start with a great one, like X-Seven, and anything not as good (most of them) is a disappointment by comparison - X-8 was certainly that for me. Start with a not-so-good one and you don't get what all the fuss is about. Hmm.

 

The match I'm watching was my FAVOURITE match for YEARS. Probably only Undertaker vs. Triple H from ten years later at 27 surpasses it even now. I'm watching TLC II. 

 

You know, this match is burned into my memory. I can visualise it virtually spot for spot even now, fourteen years later, I watched it that many times. And I watched it in utter awe at what these guys were doing. I hadn't seen the Triangle Ladder Match and my tape of Summerslam 2000 cut off somewhere around the start of Shane McMahon vs. Steve Blackman so at that point, I hadn't seen TLC I either. So this was entirely new to me. It was - and still is, if you ask me - the pinnacle of 'stunt' wrestling. I don't know why anyone ever tried to top it, because while you might be able to do bigger bumps, you'll never be able to do them in front of that crowd, with that atmosphere, in that HUGE setting, in a WWE truly at the height of its power.

 

Anyway, it sounds like I'm reviewing the match before I've even started it! I'll stop. Before I watch, though, I am going to watch the 'My Way' X-Seven highlights video. Here it is:

 

 

Best Mania ever? Before watching that video I'd have said 'for me, it probably is'. After watching? I'd say 'yes, absolutely, without a single doubt. Best ever.' You never forget your first.

 

(The Austin heel turn never bothered me in the slightest because I never liked him anyway.)

 

And on to Dudleyville.

 

The match

 

JR and Paul Heyman build us up beforehand as stagehands lay out dozens of tables, ladders and chairs around the ring. I think I've said this once in the thread already, but I LOVED the JR/Heyman combination on commentary. Especially for matches like this.

 

The Hardy Boyz are out first and the MASSIVE crowd (biggest single crowd for years, I would have thought?) goes mad for them. I love the X-Seven set up, just love it. Lita's not with them because Rhyno Gored her and took her out of action. That's the advantage this match would have over the ones previous, each team had an 'extra' by this time - Lita, Rhyno and Spike.

 

E&C out next. The screen, the crowd, the blue apron, it just all works visually. Heyman and JR really build up all the competitors brilliantly here. I am HYPED.

 

FIIIIIIIREWORKS BOOOM! Dudley Boyz! They're using the music Bubba used at the Rumble this year. God, all three of these teams were just excellent, and how amazing to have them all together at the same time. Gold. Utter gold.

 

They all look up at the Tag Team Title belts "and here we go". Hardys go after Edge, Dudleys after Christian, big double flapjack on Christian and now it's Hardy vs. Dudley. Poetry in Motion on BOTH Dudleys at once and already the first ladder is in play FUUUUUCK the Hardys took that ladder from E&C face first.

 

Unprotected headshot count: 1.

 

Dudleys eat a ladder too. E&C hang Matt in the Tree of Woe and stand on his bollocks as he screams in pain. Chair set up and a double drop toehold for Jeff onto a chair.

 

Unprotected headshot count: 2.

 

"I hear Dudleyville is just outside Parts Unknown," says JR. Ha! Matt tries climbing the ladder but Edge takes him out with a clothesline and now Edge is going up but a massive dropkick from Jeff knocks him down from halfway. Hardys baseball slide takes out the Dudleys (who had a ladder too) and the Hardys are setting up two ladders. Christian gets slammed and I know what's coming - they both climb a ladder. Matt goes AAAAAAAAAH and Jeff splashes Christian from the top of the ladder as Matt leg drops him from the other.

 

Dudleys' turn now, slamming Edge and WHHHAAAAAAAASSSSSUP. "This will adversely affect your sexual drive" is a JR call I have never forgotten. Crowd LOVE the Dudleys. "Get the tables!" shouts Bubba, and Heyman points out there's no shortage of them tonight. Two tables being set up and it looks like Edge is about to feel one. 

 

FUCK YES I REMEMBER THIS, Bubba catches Jeff and power bombs him through Edge, through the table. Heyman is a perfect co-commentator for JR here. Meanwhile, the Dudleys have set up the four tables on the outside and I know what's going to happen there because I watched that spot (when it happened) hundreds of times, and I'm probably not exaggerating.

 

Inside, meanwhile, three ladders are up and it's Hardys vs. Dudleys again. Matt just got himself two ladders straight to the head.

 

Unprotected headshot count: 4.

 

EVERYONE'S CLIMBING THE LADDERS EVERYONE'S UP AND EVERYONE'S DOWN. Christian JUST FUCKING FELL OFF THE TOP OF THE LADDER TO THE FLOOR WHAT WAS CHRISTIAN ON TO AGREE TO TAKE THAT FALL. Matt crotched himself on a rope, D-Von and Jeff go down next, and then Bubba and Edge kind of tag each other off the ladders.

 

The crowd's picking up because here comes Spike! My favourite Dudley! Dudley Dog for Edge, and then DUDLEY DOG TO CHRISTIAN FROM THE INSIDE TO THE OUTSIDE THROUGH A TABLE ON THE OUTSIDE! Christian is dead and Spike's not much better off. EC-Dub chant from the crowd.

 

"It's Rhyno!" cries Heyman, who rips Jeff off a ladder, hits D-Von with a ladder, GORES Bubba even though JR calls it a Spear and then Gores Matt through a table.

 

And here's Lita! I forgot how massive her boobs were in 2001. She takes Edge off the ladder, but Rhyno has her above his head! Spike low blows Rhyno and LITACANRANA on Rhyno! Edge is at the top of the ladder but Spike hits Rhyno on the head with a chair and he falls into Edge who falls off the ladder into the ropes and there's stuff coming at me so fast I can't keep up with it and even as I said that Rhyno got the Dudley Death Device, Spike got a chairshot THROUGH his head, Lita ate a 3-D, Bubba got taken out with some chairs by E&C, and I need a breather. "Everyone is a victim in TLC," says Heyman. "Everyone."

 

Unprotected headshot count: 6.

 

Jeff has a MASSIVE ladder out now, and I can vividly remember being in absolute AWE, absolutely in AWE as Jeff climbs up it. He gestures to the audience and SWANTONS OFF THE MASSIVE LADDER THROUGH SPIKE AND RHYNO THROUGH A TABLE. Tables-eye view for the replay, and then another one, it's clear Spike ate most of that but Jeff, that was insane.

 

Edge has got another massive ladder, but we get one more replay of Jeff's Swanton. Christian and D-Von are climbing the huge ladder that already reaches the belts, they have one each but Matt moved the ladder! They're hanging! It's like bloody Gladiators here and what a visual with a stadium sizes crowd. D-Von goes down, Christian goes down after, but JEFF IS UP AND HE'S ONLY FUCKING DOING STEPPING STONES OVER THE TOPS OF THE LADDERS. One fell down but Jeff gets it back up and tries again. He's hanging on, Bubba takes the ladder away, leaving him open FOR EDGE EDGE EDGE SPEARING JEFF HARDY FROM A TWENTY FOOT LADDER WHAAAAAAAAAAT.

 

"What price are they NOT willing to pay to be the Tag Team Champions?!" asks Heyman and i'm going to get back to this because RHYNO JUST PUSHED MATT AND BUBBA OFF THE LADDER TO THE OUTSIDE AND THEY WENT THROUGH ALL THE TABLES, ALL THE FUCKING TABLES, THAT WAS THE MOST MENTAL THING I HAVE EVER SEEN.

 

Rhyno helps E&C up to the top of the ladder and they win - but at what cost?

 

Where was I? Right, the spear. You know that image. It's another one of those iconic ones. Jeff suspended in mid-air, 65,000 watching. Edge poised on the massive ladder. Edge leaping. the connection. Jeff's body folding up as they fall. The crash and splat of the landing. Incredible.

 

And then the four-table fall. I watched that so many times at the time. I could not believe what I'd seen. Those tables just SHATTERED. Again, incredible.

 

My thoughts

 

Yeah, that totally lived up to the impression I had of it in my head. Brilliant, brilliant match. I didn't realise quite how thick and fast the action came, I think I've become used to big gaps between the huge stunts, but it fitted perfectly here to just have the action keep on coming. That's definitely still one of my all time favourites, but you probably already guessed that from how many EXCITED CAPITAL LETTERS I used… I'd happily watch it again right now.

[HarmonicGenerator]

Right then. If I keep on at a rate of one match per night, I think I'll be on track to coincide WrestleMania 30 with the Saturday night before 'Mania 31. Since I'm busy on the Sunday, that should work out perfectly!

 

For WrestleMania X-8, I'm going for something I haven't done yet - a women's match! It's going to be Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Jazz.

 

I remember X-8 being a massive disappointment for me after the joy of X-Seven the year before. It just wasn't as good, try as I might to make it so in my imagination. I partly blame the commemorative magazine which I bang on about all the time, but I seriously consider it my favourite ever wrestling-related purchase (other than my paid membership of this place, naturally). It was so good it made me ultra-excited for the show, so anything below the level of expectation I'd built up for myself was going to end badly. Undertaker vs. Flair was my favourite match of the night, but hindsight has made me pick this match (the third triple threat variant in a row, for those counting) because I remember the Women's division in 2002-3 being really quite good.

 

You had the 'wrestler' women, like Jazz, Lita, Mighty Molly and later Victoria. You had the best eye candy WWE has ever had in Torrie Wilson and Stacy Keibler. And at the centre, you had Trish Stratus, who from Survivor Series '01 had one of the most stratospheric (pun intended) improvements of any wrestler ever, in my view. She went from utter rubbish to 'pretty bloody good, actually' in a really short space of time. This was during the time Finlay was coaching the Women's division I think, but it's a bit harsh to give all the credit to a bloke, so I won't. But he probably did help a lot.

 

I'll probably pick one or two more women's matches by the time this project is done, too.

 

But that's enough about that. It's WRESTLEMANIA!

 

 The match:

 

Looking at the WrestleMania X-8 poster image they use on the Network… I don't remember that at all.

 

Ooh, a Network first - 'Suggestive Dialogue'! 

 

Huge crowd in the Toronto Skydome as the old-school 'Women's Championship' title match graphic pops up. Jazz is the champion going into this match - I had forgotten that. She's got a sign from a fan in the audience! Jazz always looked tough.

 

Lita! This is her 'SO FUCK YOUR RULES MAAAAAAAAN' music, and they're plugging the Forceable Entry album as she enters (looking quite lovely, I must admit). I had that album. I loved that album. I played it on repeat for most of 2002.

 

Trish is out last, dressed all Canadian because she's the hometown girl. She doesn't have her most famous music. She doesn't get time to even get to the ring before Lita's after Jazz. Lita and Trish double team Mrs Rodney Mack (they were married, weren't they?) but she smacks fuck out of both of them before locking a single leg crab on Trish.

 

Lita gets lifts up in a double-arm chickenwing and then dropped, then leg dropped, then a double arm suplex, all by Jazz. She takes a moment to spin kick Trish out of the ring which gives Lita time to recover with a hurricanrana and a John Cena-esque power bomb type thing.

 

Trish appears to have disappeared from the action entirely, it's all Lita and Jazz so far. Oh no hang on, here she is. Roll up by Trish for a two count, Lita tries a top rope cross body but Trish reverses. It's now Lita vs. Trish, and we get a Chick Kick and a Stratusfaction bulldog - and you know what, I just remembered the names of two of Trish Stratus' signature moves. I could barely give you two moves for the entire Divas division put together these days.

 

While I typed that, Jazz hit a few moves but didn't win. Lita and Trish staredown, which was great. Actually really great, because even then these two were the icons of the division. They exchange forearms, Trish takes a bad fall from a back body drop and Jazz eats a Twist of Fate.

 

Lita misses a moonsault, and the crowd are warming up - this match came right after Hogan vs. Rock so it was fighting a losing battle for people's attention form the off. Jerry Lawler's only made one pervy comment so far. Trish is not quite at the level she got to by the end of 2002, she's still quite sloppy in how she executes things, but took a nasty move into the turnbuckles which gets a big "oooooh" from the crowd.

 

OOF! Jazz hit a fisherman's superplex on Lita! Academic pinfall and Jazz retains the title. You know what, I just assumed Trish would have won that. I think I thought that at the time too. We absorb Jazz winning for about five seconds before the show cuts to Christian trying to leave the arena with the Hardcore Title in a taxi when Maven pins him in the car park and buggers off. Ah, Maven...

 

My thoughts

 

Weeeelll… it wast bad. I'm trying not to go all rose-tinted but I at least knew who all three of these girls were and a bit about them, they were all distinct from each other - i'd struggle to do that with today's main-roster ladies aside from Paige, AJ and the Bellas, but then I guess that's why those four have the Mania match this year. The match itself wasn't very good, as I mentioned Trish hadn't quite got to the level she would reach later on (both in terms of wrestling ability and crowd support) but she was getting there, and her Canadian outfit was splendid. Lita and Jazz were both fine. As a crowd-calmer between Rock-Hogan and the main event, it served its purpose. Surprising ending with Jazz retaining the title, though.

[HarmonicGenerator]

I took a half-day from work today because I have an assignment to complete. I have reached an impasse in said assignment, so am taking a break. In said break, I will be watching a match from WrestleMania XIX.

 

And here I reach a conundrum, because there are so many matches I want to rewatch on here. Just looking at the card, XIX might be one of my favourite Manias. I remember really liking it after the disappointment of X-8, loving the set-up and the blue theme, and so on.

 

I could have Rey Mysterio, who was brilliant around this time, against Matt Hardy doing Version 1, which I loved. I could go for Rock vs. Austin because I haven't actually watched a match featuring either of them yet. Maybe Brock vs. Angle because I haven't watched a Lesnar match from his first run since he came back. Or Vince vs. Hogan, for the shock twist of Roddy Piper returning and images like this:

 

 

There's Jericho vs. Michaels, which I remember thinking was bloody fantastic at the time, and Jericho had the best outfit he's ever had (which is a stupid thing to say but it's the costume I always picked for him on SmackDown Here Comes The Pain). I've not watched a Bikertaker match in ages and he bikes down to the ring with Limp Bizkit doing Rollin' live on this show. There's another women's triple threat which would be interesting to watch following the last one... 

 

… I now really want to watch the whole show. Maybe another day, when I have more time.

 

For some reason, however, despite all of that, I'm not picking any of those matches. I'm having the Tag Team Title triple threat match (four in a row): Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros vs. Chris Benoit & Rhyno.

 

I'm picking it because

 - I haven't watched any Eddie Guerrero in this project, and Los Guerreros were a great team

 - This is the last tag title match on a Mania that I fancy watching

 - I like Rhyno

 - Team Angle were cool

 - and mostly, I was a SmackDown guy at this time, and this match screams 'SmackDown circa 2003' at me. More so than Lesnar/Angle or Mysterio/Hardy, because it's got six guys in it.

 

I may regret this choice. We'll see.

 

The match

 

Los Guerreros are out first. No low rider. I knew I should have watched Rock vs. Austin. They're wearing matching pairs of fetching green tickets. The entrance way is huge.

 

Benoit (using his newer music) is out next, Rhyno must be getting his own entrance. I really liked that music, I couldn't listen to it now. And here's Rhyno. He and Benoit must have bonded over the fact they both missed the last WrestleMania due to neck injuries. I'm glad Rhyno is back in NXT.

 

Tazz is on commentary with Michael Cole. I KNEW I should have watched Michaels vs. Jericho.

 

Team Angle had snappy looking singlets. That's the third mention of outfits in this post, sorry. Team Angle are singled out to kick things off, and it's a one-fall match, so whoever gets the first pin wins the titles for their team.

 

Chavo and Haas start things off and they're going at a serious pace in the early going. Chavo was at his best in the team with Eddie. Double team by Los Guerreros and Eddie slingshots in with an elbow on Benoit. Eddie and Benoit go at it and it's both great to watch because they were both so fucking good and they're really going at it, but at the same time it is fucking tragic knowing what was to come.

 

Rhyno in now, yay! Rhyno and Eddie had some matches for the US Title didn't they? Might stick that on the rewatch list after the rest of WrestleMania XIX. Rhyno powerslammed Eddie, but now Shelton Benjamin's in. Some blokes just walked past on the hard cam with a pair of signs saying 'Lots of people suck'. Double dropkick by Team Angle and I've already tuned Tazz and Cole out, they're talking over each other about taking biology in school. I should have damn well watched Vince vs. Hogan.

 

We're now with Haas and Benoit, the tags and the action's going so fast I can barely keep up with it. The crowd looks mahoosive here, what was the attendance for XIX?

 

Rhyno and Benjamin now and I'm seriously considering muting the commentary. I do not remember Tazz and Cole being this bad. Should have watched Hardy vs. Mysterio (on mute).

 

Eddie and Rhyno again now, but before I can finish the sentence we're back to Benoit and Guerrero and Eddie suplexed Benoit on his head . Eddie went up to the top rope and OOF! Superplex! Benoit pretty much landing on his head again. I know every wrestler takes moves like that, it's just so much more noticeable with him.

 

Wow! Benoit pushed Eddie up in the air and as he dropped down he locked in the crossface, that was nice. Guerrero fights back with a brainbuster, Team Angle (the champions) keep breaking up the pins. Chavo takes care of them with a lovely hurricanrana, but Benoit cuts him off with three HUGE German suplexes. Nope, four. But Chavo tagged in Shelton, who kicks Benoit in the chest ("STERNUM! STERNUM!" shouts Tazz. Triple H vs. Booker T, that is what I should have watched, I'd have at least had Ross and Lawler there) and we finally have a bit of respite from the action.

 

54,000? It looks like more.

 

Shelton covers Benoit for a pin but Eddie breaks it up by Frog Splashing him. Haas launches Charlie with a belly to belly, opening himself up for a GORE! GORE! GORE!

 

Another GORE! GORE! GORE! For Chavo! Eddie pulls Rhyno out of the ring and in sneaks Shelton Benjamin to get the pin and the win. Team Angle retain!

 

My thoughts:

 

Good match. Went at a right old pace, there was only that one moment where everyone was down and not much was happening. 

 

Sorry, I am totally distracted. The show's just cut to a backstage segment with Torrie and Stacy arguing about who made WrestleMania what it is, Hogan or McMahon. 

 

Where was I?

 

Oh yeah. Good match, dreadful commentary. Torrie and Stacy are lovely.

[HarmonicGenerator]

Sorry, one more observation on XIX. After Torrie and Stacy, the Miller Lite Catfight Girls have an argument about who made WrestleMania, Mr McMahon or Hulk Hogan. One of them can't say 'Hogan' and pronounces it 'Holgan'. The way they go back and forth reminded me this morning of this classic moment.

 

 

"Mr McMahon!"

"Hulk Holgan!"

"Mr... McMahon!"

"Hulk... Holgan!"