Jimmy_kahoona

Sherlock Holmes

The Guy Ritchie one.

Brilliant!

Freddie vs Jason

I`ve seen this movie before, a good while back, but forgot enough about it to watch it again.

Plot: Freddies dead, Jasons dead! Freddie decides to make a return but cant cause the kids of elm street dont fear him, and without fear Freddie has no power. So He reanimates Jason and sends him on his merry killing ways to strike fear into the kids again, therefore growing in power and destroying some kids himself!

All is going killingly until Jason decides to kill a sleeping kid just as freddie is about to kill them in the dream world. Freddie doesnt get the kill and gets pissed at jason. Que some freddie vs jason milarky.

My memory served me better than watching it again as I remember the film being quite smooth and good paced when really its more 45 minutes being boringly over plottified (yes we know the plot please dont explain it again!) and then 45 minutes of freddie vs jason (which is excellent!)

Theres some neat tricks and great francise injokes and the fight is stunning, especially if you`ve followed both characters through their own individual storylines but its just not lacking enough depth to stand on its own.

A good attempt at cross promotion and franchise continuation, well worth watching with a bag of popcorn and a juice!

Santa`s Slay

due to it being christamas (`IT IS` I hear you shout!) I decided to watch Santas Slay - starring everyones favourite undefeated wrestler - GoldBerg.

Alot of folk have slagged this film off and it has featured in the Bottom list of crappy movies of all time lists. why they did this I`ll never know.

Oh yes I do!

Its fuckin awful!

Theres a back story of the fact that santa is infact the bastard child of Satan and that he was an evil bastard who killed and mained folk just for a laugh. Then one day an angel played him at Ice Curling (yes Curling! which isnt acted out but shown using stop motion animation), beat him and he had to be a nice present delivery person for 1000 years. Now the 1000 years is up and hes allowed to kill again. Thats it. Santa randomly kills folk in some of the worst fashion, rams a little old lady off the road, spikes another guy with a candle holder, drowns someone in eggnog.

Its basically 80 minutes of Bill Goldberg RANDOMLY killing folk in a little town in the most unoriginal style ever. Theres no gore, no scaryness, no plot and absolutely no need to ever see this film

Nothing happens. Theres a chase on a snowmobile while santa throws exploding presents from his sleigh, worst use of wobbling camera ever!

Jimmy, Bernard and the Genie is an awesome film, and should be shown every Christmas.

 

Ill second that, Iam sure it had a repeat in about 1995 if memory serves as I remember watching it slightly intoxicated and thinking this is shit hawt! Gary Lineker has a cameo iirc?

Yep he does have a cameo!

I do agree it should be one of those fundemental christmas showings!

We should start a facebook group

watched `bernard and the genie` tonight.

This TV movie was made by talkback productions and the BBC starring Alan Cumming as Bernard, Lenny Henry as the genie, Rowan Atkinson as Bernards boss and a load of cameos by other TV personalities.

Why havent I heard of this I hear you cry?

Thats cause it was made in 1991 and has never released on dvd (although there is a region 1 dodgy dvd that sells for upwards of

Harry Brown

Starring Michael Cain, Harry Brown is a UK vigilante film in the Style of Deathwish, old man takes out young guys, but set in british high rise concrete suburbia.

This is a great movie. Probably the best british movie of the year. But it is rather depressing. Set to the backdrop of concrete and high rise buildings its very claustrophobic and grey, probably a deliberate point than pure chance but it does make it quite hard to watch. Even the colourful areas are dulled down and grainy looking.

Michael Cain puts in an amazing performance and, hopefully, gets him over with the younger generation than more than just `that butler guy` from Batman. Theres still elements of `convenience` and `lucky` for the characters but theres also a few very difficult to watch sections that actually make you wanna turn away.

The best musical is The Blues Brothers 2000. Fuck anyone who says otherwise.

UN-Fixed

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers is also a great musical

So good infact my limited knowledge of the barn building scene actually got me a snog off a fit bird! I had to look around to make sure someone seen us or noone would have believed me! She was hot!

</happy memories>

i dont wish to hijack this thread but just a quick question,

Sci-Fi and Horror channel show these crappy modern computer graphic B-Movies but most are guff. Rather than wading through an almost endless amount of tat, are there and of the modern day B Movies/poundshop DVds worth watching?

Turtles Forever - What, you haven't seen this?

NO I haven`t but guess what?

I will do by this time tomorrow! this sounds frigin awsome. I will not being finishing the bathroom floor tonight dear, i`m watching the Turtles! Cowabunga!

hit the cinema tonight and heres my reviews of what i watched (because my opinions count)

Nativity!

Its about a school teacher who puts on a nativity play. He says something stupid trying to impress someone and the town thinks the plays going to be filmed for Hollywood.

There is not much else to it. Its made by the BBC and stars a whole host of cameo BBC people. Is it any good? well, do you have kids? have they ever been in a nativity play? if you answered `Yes` to both these questions you`ll find it hilarious. If you answered `No!` to both these questions, then i`d watch it to see what it would feel like to have kids in a nativity play. Its a good film, goes alittle weird in parts and seems to loose its way about 5 minutes from the end but its a good family romp but probably better for parents to reflect back on how kids like to be in plays!

Twilight - New Moon

1 of 2 things are about to happen here. Either I`m going to slate it saying its a whole toss pot of Tweener romantic action pish that deserves to rot in the infestation that is tweener goth/emo/pretend rock pile of manure crap.

Or its going to be a great follow up to an excellent romantic movie.

The Box

 

A small wooden box arrives on the doorstep of a married couple, who know that opening it will grant them a million dollars and kill someone they don't know.

 

I enjoyed it. A film (like Donnie Darko and Southland Tales) that you will want to talk about as soon as its finished and probably will want to watch again.

I think i will always like Richard Kelly's film because he has some interesting ideas. I even enjoyed Southland Tales because of this, although i realise it isn't a very good film!

I read a few months ago on yahoo movies that this film is the worst film ever made! Its being slated by reviewers and watchers as awful!

I`ll still watch it though, loved the original twilight zone episode

`Paranormal Activity`

 

SPOILER - Highlight the black box to read

I`m using spoilers here in case someone actually thinks its all real!

 

Theres 3 ending to this movie. The Cinema ending is the one shes a demon and throws her boyfriend. I downloaded the `police` ending

 

thankfully they changed the ending for this film as the `police` ending seems very anti-climatic.

 

But apparently the original `throat slit` ending is quite disturbing. anyone got any links to that ending?

 

Apparently that ending hasn't been shown anywhere.

An extra on the DVD release is probably the only hope atm.

SPOILER - Highlight the black box to read

`Paranormal Activity`

SPOILER - Highlight the black box to read

Me and the mrs finally watched Tenacious D In The Pick of Destiny that I taped a few months back and flipping loved it!

I'm sure this movie must be a popular one on this board with the rock n wrestling thing. It was bloody hilarious.

I watched this quite reciently myself. Had the album for ages and even seen the previous double dvd set with the live stage show.

But I was disappointed in the film.

Its another stoner film. I hate stoner films. I dont do weed or other recreational drugs so to me most of the stuff was pointless.

I really wanted to watch the film with my daughter whos a big jack black fan but thank the maker the misses told me not to let her watch it! Theres a huge difference between the PG School of Rock and this 15 outing!

Theres some classic set ups (especially the video game to real life) and some great chemistry between jack and kyle but it just seems to be missing that extra something to make everything gel together and become awsome.

A good outing none the less, just not great!

Just back from seeing Paranormal Activity

Already been mentioned a few times but here my take on the thing.

SPOILER - Highlight the black box to read

On the contrary, Robert Rodriguez is currently producing a new Predator movie called "Predators" about a group of marines that get captured on the Predator's home planet. I have high hopes for it.

This sounds awfully like a twilight zone story

where the guy lands on a planet and they accept him and put him in a house but it turns out to be a zoo and everyones watching him!

i purchased the 2 disc special edition of predator 2 off ebay for

seen Die Hard 4.0 this morning, or lets call it Live free or die young for any stateside readers.

Take John McClane from the film and its a bog standard 2 hours action flick.

Leave John McClane in the film and its a bog standard 2 hour standard action flick.

And as action flicks go its good, even boardering on real good. But like any bog standard action flick it does rely on the viewer turning their brain off and accepting that any man can balance on the tail fin of an F15 Jet while hes just been shot to pieces by a chain gun and didnt recieve so much as a scratch.

Kevin smith (of Silent Bob) appears in a nice little suitable part that allows a mark out moment.

The undertones of everyman is a hero are not hinted at here, they`re rammed down your throat. Its a very american movie using alot of 4th of july, flag waving, 911 stuff but its worth 2 hours of your life.

seen Gamer at the weekend

the concept is very nice, big corporation using nano tech to allow poor people to be controlled by rich people purely for the fun of a game and money of course.

was there a message in the film? or was it just 60 minutes of motion sickness and 30 minutes of slutty inuendo?

the film didnt work. on one hand you have the message of everyone will do anything for money and power, and that the people who pay to have money and power are bad, discusting no moral people. Then on the other your aiming your film at those people who just paid to watch some things blowing up, people being killed and teenage twins showing off their breasts! The very people who you just tanned in the film! Very mixed messaging.

An excellent concept just a shame there were far too much spinning cameras and weak script points to make it worth anything.

watched St Trinians remake last night

Its a great british movie and plenty of potential that wasn`t wasted.

The plot is simple, the schools getting closed down cause its ran up debt, the girls make a plan to save it.

I cant really fault it because its a stupidly fun film thats there purely for the fun of it. It doesnt claim to be anything more.

BUT

Morally its way over the top. The overuse of sexual schoolgirls, although in my opinion you can never get enough of that (when your alone), makes it uncomfortable to watch with others, especially since i was watching it with my daughter. The drug references were not needed, especially the secratery who handed out uppers and downers to anyone interested and the offering of `poppers` during a hockey game! This content was far too old for a teen audience.

But morals aside it was a good film and the sequel will be getting a cinema viewing.

(and the dvd will be getting a private viewing! )

the first one was very simlply a well thought out movie. Although it was a rip off of cannibal holocaust (lost footage refound, genuine article)

it quite simply caught peoples imaginations.

cant remember much about the sequel although i think i got the dvd somewhere

Nostradamus's predictions make perfect sense once you put something that almsot matches into it.

they dont make much sense now

I dont know much about his predictions but if the third anti-christ is due in a couple of years, what happened to the first 2?

watched `Live Feed`

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0481280/

its one of `Poundland`s Halloween DVDs so I wasn`t holding much out for a

recently watched some of my hd-dvds (yeah some people still have them)

I didnt want to splash out hundreds for a blu-ray (not yet anyway, wait till i can,, well you know,, back them up! first) so i looked into buying a HD player and discs

have you seen the price of them on eBay?

christ, so much for a dead system!

as to films, watched Inglorious basterds!

the film was great but a few things missing, more gore would have been nice and a better ending (thought it wsn`t that great a final scene!)

apart from that it was great