Harry Wiseau

wasn't sure if I should put this in the Kunts Christmas thread or here, but as it's obviously nothing to do with Kunt and actually a really catchy Christmas song it seems at home here. 

I've bought four festive bakes from the Greggs outlet near me but my eldest hasn't let me anywhere near them, he did kindly let me have a bite it the Christmas lunch baguette though which was surprisingly really good, the pigs under blankets baguettes in recent years have been disappointing but the Christmas lunch one is good. 

19 minutes ago, Chili said:

I preferred Bumble but then when I redownloaded it earlier this year the first person who popped up on the feed was my CBT therapist. 

She was very attractive. No, I didn't, before anyone enquires. 

She's into CBT? I know I've been married for a long time so the dating game has probably changed a bit since the advent of dating apps but that's a bit forward as an opening gambit isn't it! Strewth!

Or does CBT stand for more than one thing?

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-67536339. 🎶🎵 Look in my eyes, what do you see? Front page news on BBC🎵🎶

2 minutes ago, SuperBacon said:

You want to watch it AFTER you've read my review? Up your lithium.

It's on YouTube if you badly want to.

 

You made it sound a lot better than a lot of Christmas movies I've seen, you're quite the salesman. 

I've had a complete arse of a day, starting with forgetting to take my lunch AND my cool of tea for my journey to work with me then from car related shit to work related shit to the two year old being ill, everything today has totally sucked, the highlight of the day has been reading this thread. So I thought I'd send the day on a high and watch Fir Crazy after reading @SuperBacon review, I couldn't find it on anything so opted for Anna and the Apocalypse not the normal rom com Christmas story but I thought a zombie Christmas movie might be fun - six minutes in and not only is Dennis Pennis in it perfectly the character he later used in After Life but it's a fucking MUSICAL!!!! and I thought today couldn't get any worse!

Presumably you'll be having a Dean "Christmasman" Cain weekend at some point in the buildup? he pretty much carried the genre on his back for a few years there (I think he was in 13 of them at last count, at least three with dogs in)

that's probably killed Kunt's chance of getting in the top ten (40) then as there's no Blofeld to his Bond this year. I was already a bit dubious as he's gone down the proper Christmas song route this year and isn't having a pop at the government (or anyone)  so i fear he'll get lost in the mix. Shame as it's a really catchy good Christmas song as well and it looks like he's put more effort into it than usual bless him.

9 minutes ago, SuperBacon said:

Don't you worry @Harry Wiseau I've been eyeing up this trilogy. Sounds amazing.

You're going all in for the whole trilogy? You're a braver man than I and I salute you . I'll eagerly await your report.

Good luck.

Hats off to Christmas is the one that always comes to mind as perfect hallmark fodder for me (I know it's currently on prime and it's on Great! Later this week) it's been a while but from what I recall it's along the lines of - Haylie Duff works in a flailing Christmas Hat shop with ambitions of promotion when just as she thinks she's getting her dream position the owners dick of a son gets the job and she has to train him up, they don't get along but eventually she sees the other side of him etc. You know the sort, fucking dreadful.

The MAJOR dreadful Christmas film I always think of, and I've lent the DVD to people who claim to love shit Christmas films and have had people return it unfinished, is The Christmas Shoes it's atrocious. From memory - I think I just watched in it 2007 but I have the DVD somewhere - it's actually based on a song that features in it called The Christmas Shoes, they made a film based on a song. A woman is diagnosed with a terminal disease that I don't think is actually named, her son sees some shoes that he wants to buy for her so she can dance her way to meet Jesus, he tries to make money by collecting empty cans, Rob Lowe is also in it as a dick businessmen. Stuff happens with if you're going to watch it I won't spoil but it ends with this fucking song playing, the Christmas shoes, it's worth watching for this godawful Christian Rock song it's so so so very bad. If you're not going to watch it I could go into further detail but it's one of those that people really should watch to see just how bad it is.

I'm sure I have the DVD somewhere if you can't find it on any streaming services. I believe they made two sequels one which even had Doogie Howser in but the Shoes is the one. Terrible.

4 hours ago, Sphinx said:

 

Edit: don't know how to use spoiler tags. Thought it was [spoiler][/spoiler].

12 hours ago, Keith Houchen said:

Crisps in HMV? Fucking hell. I just want my country

Country is usually at the back next to the Folk and Soundtracks sections 

Of course he is. The stick adds to the walls evil billionaire look. 

6 hours ago, Loki said:

Seeing as how GAP don't exist over in the UK any more and they were my favourite clothing store, that actually WOULD entice me!

Didn't they open some new stores fairly recently? Like within a year or so? It's probably only London Manchester, Birmingham but I'm sure they made a bit of a comeback

He was a complicated man who no-one understood but his woman - Richard Rowntree, known to the world as SHAFT! Sadly gone to be a sex machine to all the chicks in the sky. 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-67191245

The Supersuckers were -as expected - fucking brilliant. I missed the Warner E Hodges band because I was busy eating a curry and drinking my nights allocation of three pints in a pub but round the corner but the Suckers were a brilliant as always, greatest rock and roll band in the world even when there's less than a hundred People watching

Yeah, completed listings on eBay and the average and last sold price on discogs, most of my stuffs not going for much but some of it is silly money considering it's stuff I haven't listened to in ages and will never again (Manson for example) I only ever bought them to listen and it's not like I'm going to go crazy and try and pay the mortgage off by selling everything but got the stuff I know I'm never going to listen to and is making money I might see how it goes. 

I did have a romantic vision of my retirement where I would finally get the chance to sit down to actually listen to them all, an album a day, in alphabetical order then the night after I listened to ZZ tops greatest hits I pass away in my sleep but I guess on the day I was going to listen to the first oasis album I'll just read a book instead. On my Kindle though, all the physical ones will be gone by then.

5 hours ago, Panhead said:

Have a look on eBay. The one I sold recently was the Simply Vinyl 180g. 

I did, then I went on discogs, then I made the mistake of looking up some other stuff I own that and now I feel a bit sick. A lot of stuff has been selling for less than a fiver but certain albums have sold at an average of a fair bit, to the point where I can't ever listen to them knowing they've sold for that and I feel like I should sell a bunch as otherwise the spine will just be bleached by the sun and devalue it. There's certain things I don't think I'll be able to bring myself to get rid of and I know streaming isn't the utopia people think it is but I can't knowingly keep some of that stuff just in case I want to listen to one side of one record in fifteen years time when I could get £200+ for it right now.

I wish I hadn't looked.

7" singles are worth nothing though which is a shame as I've got loads of them and would happily sell them as I never listen to them as it involves taking the platter off the turntable to change the spec speed.

Seeing the always excellent Supersuckers and Warner E Hodges (one of the guys from Jason and the Scorchers that isn't Jason apparently) in Birmingham on Tuesday, last time I saw the Suckers it was the small room of the Hare and Hounds and there was hardly anyone there so hopefully this time they'll get a better audience. 

5 hours ago, Panhead said:

I've made just over a grand recently selling a few Marilyn Manson records. 

 

Please tell me that the original pressing of Mechanical Animals is worth loads these days? I remember buying it because it was a double album on CD but on two separate LP's in different sleeves and I liked the gimmick but I can't have listened to either one more than twice so if it's worth anything I wouldn't be upset to part with it. It's probably worth about 50p though because from what I recall it's terrible.

After completing Sparks recently I told Mrs W that my record buying days are over with just a few caveats (any new Sparks, Ginger, Helen Love, possibly a few others) because apparently I've "got enough" and she recently bought me an Echo Studio which to be fair does sound really really good so these days i rarely actually get to put a record on due to having that and hardly having any time to actually listen to anything at home when no bugger else is about.

I do love a record though, I massively regret those days in the late 90s where I'd buy an album on tape because I could listen to it on the bus home rather than get the LP then tape it when I got home. I'm always happy when I remember the day 1977 by Ash was released and both the LP and cassette were £3.99 for one day, I was and still an so pleased that I actually bought the LP on that occasion.

Picture discs suck though.

31 minutes ago, Chest Rockwell said:

 But it's pretty much impossible to cut yourself with a cartridge style razor so the worst you'll do is irritate your skin. 

I've managed it on at least 25% of my lifetimes face shaves, i think it's down to hating shaving and getting bored / distracted so i tend to shave really quickly to get it out of the way, it's usually on my jawline on the second go round as by that point i'm really fed up so just hacking away at my face. and unless i'm in the shower within twenty seconds of the shaving process ending my face goes bright red and itchy for about an hour.

48 minutes ago, Max Power said:

Can't burp. Don't know how you're supposed to do it. Do you push from your diaphram or just your neck or throat. I can only imagine how satisfying it must be to let a decibel crushing belch out. You bastards.

So if you have an Alka Seltzer does your stomach explode and you die? Like pigeons and / or seagulls?  

I don't think I've ever thought about how I burp, it just happens, I open my mouth and the chaos ensues. If someone slaps your back does it help like winding a baby? 

We need more on this. This is a big one.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-66913653 Apparently Sophia Loren is still going! Who knew?

my kitchen mixer tap has been dripping since Christmas, it's obviosuly just a washer and  it's really doing Mrs Wiseau's head in by now so at the weekend I decided I HAD to get it sorted, ordered new Allen keys off Amazon as i've no idea where the old ones are, got a whole range of washers ready but i can't get the sodding tap off! i know how it should work but i cant do it. I cam't bring myself to pay a plumber just to change a washer so i think i'm going to have to buy a new tap and get him to change the whole thing. stupid stupid DIY bollocks.

3 hours ago, Pinc said:

Its not always that people want Punk to live up to the gimmick in real life, but for the character to live up to it. The two get confused because they overlap, particularly in Punk’s case.

 

CM Punk returning to the WWE on a part time contract and headlining wrestlemania can be his version of the Pistols reforming for a series of huge gigs with huge paydays, they made the focus of the reformation the fact that they'd done it for the money, it's the most punk rock thing he could do, take the money of the system that didn't want him, rinse them for all they've got and laugh about it, he's living the gimmick doing what the real punks did.

Or something like that.