The Gaffer

I really hope this doesn't all go tits up tomorrow night. It mostly works dead on the money for me but even with some of the stockpiled content from New Orleans this weekend I've been getting bits of buffering and the odd 5 minute quality drops. I have no idea how servers for streaming content work so I have a very unique luddite view of it in my head that involves a few technicians in titan towers standing over several giant levers, deciding when things get hairy to shut off the one with 'Europe' painted on it because there's too many people trying to watch and we are technically not meant to have the Network yet anyway.

I know it's better than paying for SBO but I know people who already have done that and I want to see it in as good a quality as possible because I have freakish nerd OCD with that. I'm not playing a game of spot the X with titty webcam funtime pop ups in order to see WrestleMania.

It's scheduled to end at 4:30 but fuck knows. I'm guessing they'll save Warrior till last. I really mostly just want to see Scott Razor Ramon. I'll be trying to stay up as long as possible too in order to get my body clock into night owl shape so I don't drop dead halfway through WresteMania tomorrow night.

I've been mostly just watching the live channel because I get that Netflix indecisiveness trying to pick something and I rather like the idea of having a live TV channel running - even in the background - rather than a stockpile of digital content.

It didn't take long for the living room to become a weird mosaic of pizza boxes. My housemates hate me. They'd never seen Tank Abbott before.

Reminds me of the old Fila sweatshirt I used to have in my teens.

Yeah as soon as I saw those logos I thought of how cool they would be up the side of a tracksuit pants.

Can we have our own MEM style tracksuits? Because that would be totally an awesome thing.

Red, white and blue ropes make everything better forever. A good Raw that could have been a great Raw in front of a better crowd.

You can't complain too much though when you have JAKE THE SNAKE ROBERTS show up in a leather jacket looking like his day job is being a kidnapper. That music is fantastic to this day and as has been said the whole ring was marking out. Ambrose kind of dropped a half smile, half grimace when Damian was dumped on him that stood out a bit but hopefully nothing will come of it as it was just a bit of nostalgia tacked on at the end. Or was it? Jake surely at least now enters the arena of being a legend on tap, much in the vein of Slaughter and IRS [who I like to think just always, always shows up to Raw dressed as IRS, just in case you know].

Flair looked half pissed in the opening segment although it could be me reading in to things that aren't there or Flair just showing it more in his old age. I'm sure he was always half pissed whenever his job for the night didn't involve a match. He really is looking too sinewy to even do Old Ric Flair without a bit of tackiness about it these days. Lord knows how or why Triple H managed to keep himself away from the segment seeing as he is 'Naitch's biggest fan and you have the whole Evolution dynamic going on. A gullible part of me is actually swallowing up the "John Cena and Randy Orton fight in ordinary wrestling match, the way it should be" angle this is all playing out on and the idea that it could be there last time going at it and that we are getting it out of the way before WrestleMania has me not minding the 'Rumble match as much as I initially did.

Ambrose' channeling of The Joker seems to have stepped up a bit again since the whole crack in The Shield started being teased. He was all over the place in that Piper's Pit segment. Reigns still stole it though. The calm, smart arse line at the end of the other two's verbiage is working out well for him now and I don't think he should be doing any more than that as he slowly builds into the breakout star and main event player but it does make one wonder how he will change his game up once he gets there. What he is doing now, if he gets near enough for comparisons sake to that level Batista was at in 2005, is not enough I feel and that he needs a few more in ring trademarks and things he regularly says or does. I don't know ... it's like his act isn't quite complete yet.

Too Cool looked in fine tack. Alright Rikishi is a boat of a creature but for what limited things he has to do it worked out fine alongside the other two. Something about Grandmaster - chalk it up to him being Brian Christopher - tells me that it's that fake tan and last minute powder and gym blitz kind of in shape and not actual in shape but still I thought they looked well. Scotty II Hotty still comes off as one of the few people in the whole of wrestling who may be a pretty decent guy.

Daniel Bryan's cartoonish facials and po faced promo skills might have to do a small bit of catching up to really make the Wyatt thing lift. It's probably only going to last a few weeks though so whatever.

I can't remember anything else that happened apart from Arn Anderson now being one of The Godfather's hos. Sure am getting a bit excited, though. People start looking at the big neon WrestleMania sign all the time pretty soon.

I'd go further than that to be honest, cena isn't just their biggest current star he's there only star. He's the one that

moves the needle and the people want to see. Punk doesn't really want to seem to be that, he seems happy being a wrestler first and foremost.

Nah Punk wants to be the man, I reckon. Or at least he did. That's why it's so frustrating trying to marry he's hatred of protocol to his ambitions. In Cena's own words he walked in to the WWE and wanted to own the place. Punk wants to be on the posters and wants to main event WrestleMania.

What he said

 

It's a television show. They're the stars. You're over thinking it.

There's nothing to really over think. Punk can be a right capricious bastard about these things and it's not unseemly to think that WWE would not want him around it.

And yeah, or if he even wanted to.

Austin trashed the concept of doing business in kayfabe though. Mankind is deranged only as a character. Mick Foley is just an insecure bloke who will happily play ball. Punk openly and annoyingly pricks about on Twitter and at appearances acting like he doesn't give a shit. Get him on your press conference and you have Ordinary Bloke with a cubs hat on with his feet up on the desk. He's like the guy that never got off the Papa Roach buzz when everyone else did once they'd finished growing up. He's not going to school, mom.

And sure that's actually him and it's good to have people represented as individuals but I could totally understand if WWE were a bit tetchy about getting him to do this kind of stuff.

Still it'd be nice if it coughed up one of those oft hillarious moments where a weird wrestler shows up at a press conference and the media have no fucking idea what to make of it, like Fandango before WrestleMania.

"We're here".

Shane's got the look of one of them cartoonish, extroverted entrepreneurs. I'm digging it myself even though it's weird how - therapy aside - he is greyer than his old man.

I think Matt Striker said the same thing on his shoot interview. And RVD thinks demons were involved. Not figurative demons, actual ones.

Striker seemed really nice but decidedly odd in his shoot interview. He struck me as some Holland & Barrett's Max Cady who would invariably become extra super weird once the cameras were off and he started having a few beers.

With RVD you would expect it because he has a fairly straightforward YouTube induced pothead conspiracy complex about him but Matt Striker is one dark dude, I reckon.

Who would a WrestleMania audience side with out of Bryan and HBK?

Shawn Michaels would be my guess. Daniel Bryan is currently flavour of the month and no doubt everyone would join in with all the "YES" chants at the start, but the Wrestlemania crowd these days is largely made up of part-timers, tourists and old-school fans, and HBK is far more established with that audience than Bryan is. Bryan could possibly get a bit more support if HBK was really heel-ing it up, but even then Mania crowds are typically notorious for disregarding that sort of thing in favour of whoever they simply feel more sentimental about.

I think the crowd will really go for Bryan unless they fuck it up something horrible. The live audience still gobbles him up despite the ham that the booking has made of him these past few months. Michaels is falling in to the diminishing returns trap these days, too. It's just nice when he shows up, and that's about it. I think largely because now that he's not wrestling he's a really boring stubbly homestead guy shilled out in weird, non wrestling personality looking hunting gear. He's wardrobe is near enough to Zeb Colter's, isn't it. When Austin shows up he's still Austin, when Rock shows up he is still Rock - maybe sometimes even too much. Michaels doesn't seem to transition well into being a personality to have knocking about for some reason.

I'll second Arch's post as well. Given how WWE is so mental for their extra curriculum it's crazy that Raw isn't more of a variety show. Vignettes to push characters must be the most base, logical suggestion you could possibly give to the product right now.

What a wonderful video. One of those "god I love wrestling" things WWE videos are so good at bringing out. And there is more to come in the series, too. Bring it on .

Foley Is Good is where the cracks in his personality start to show. He's so much more conscious of his own character as a writer in it that the whole thing reads as an endless balancing act between "here is some issues I, Mick Foley, have" and "but I'm still a nice guy. So this time me and Scotty II Hotty were in Burger King ..."

Rey really needs to revert his look. He was cool as hell looking from 2002 to about err ... 2009/2010? The whole half mask and shiny bin bag gear thing isn't doing his huge loss of mass any favors. He's coming off like starved luchador Max California.

Someone was in a rush writing the 5-point preview this week:

 

1. Raw goes country

2. The authority is back from vacation

3. Kane might do something

4. You decide the WWE 2K14 simulation

5. We've got a PPV on Sunday

 

Jeff Jarrett better be coming back in at least virtual form or I'll be especially pissed off about 1 and 4.

It really won't be a Nashville Raw without Jarrett, will it? Shove your Goldberg and Ultimate Warrior scenarios up yer arse - if the Raw title sequence tonight is followed by a camera cut to a musical stage to the left of stage I'll die of happiness. Can't Orton sing 'With My Baby Tonight' or something?

Username pertaining.

WWE is based in Connecticut and I know it's a bit more on the don't-ask-don't-tell side anyway but it's a bit weird considering ... well ... wrestlers are always on the road. They can get their weed with a sly nod from WWE but they're still going to be taking it through loads of states where it won't be legal?

Bit of an odd one.

You can just walk in off the street to a GP office that has a subtle pot leaf in it's logo and drop anything from insomnia to writers block. The doctors in there are pro Cannabis and using their license to dole that shit out.

Recreational =/= medical. Obviously it has legitimate medical value but it's all the same shit, over there.

Thought of another one : If I ever got into a drunk playfight/adolescent skirmish type thing I'd find myself automatically doing those verbal noises Mankind used to make during his matches [you know ... the way he'd kind of run into his opponent and go "ahhda", "wahhhdya"].

whenever i sign for a parcel i slam the pen thingy down and act as if i'm in a contract signing

I really like the visual of someone taking this all the way at a job interview or something.

Now hold on just a minute, playa.

Kurt debuts on Raw, has a woo off with Flair. Messrs Michaels & Batista show up. 2005 was hot.

Triple H and Batista backstage after Vengeance 2005.

I do the hair slicking too, but in Flair mode. It happens when I play a practical joke on someone or lay down a particularly piercing bit of verbiage or whatever the case. The ideal scenario of course is those around me lapping it up, with the 'victim' coming towards me slowly in a faux threatening manner. It was always a natural reaction. Do the whole Flair backing up, hands through the hair, that whole almost slow motion North Carolina laugh thing he's got going on. I never throw in the woo though. I don't want to be too much of a mark.

I do the hand slapping thing too all the time. It's extra cool if I'm going down a narrow alley or street with bushes or fences on both side so my two arms can reach. The Hammerstein Ballroom.

Ladders are a fairly obvious one. Can any of us honestly look at one without an inward grin? The ceiling isn't high enough to hand the belt off anyway, it would never work.

And, sadly, if I'm a bit pissed walking home late at night and I have the headphones in ... well ... you know when you 'walk with purpose'? Yeah. Don't need to explain that one.

This is amazing.

I'm sick of willing them on to be better. I want to see the motherfucker burn at this point, in the most entertaining way possible.

In the main event on Raw, was there a fuck-up with The Shield's music? Did it kick in about ten minutes before it was meant to?

 

at least they're moving in a different direction to the last time Kane un-masked ("YOU WILL FEEL MY PAIN!")

That's the main thing for me. It's automatically better than Kane's last fifty or sixty heel turns, which are always the exact same thing. "I'm a monster! Hate! Hate!"

Looks like the ad break wasn't meant to happen :

Major Production Error Happens On RAW During Commercial Break

Posted by Joseph Lee on 11.05.2013

 

Triple H and Stephanie had to scramble...

 

Those watching RAW last night (from Greenville, South Carolina) may have noticed an awkward commercial break that interrupted the final segment involving Big Show, Triple H and Stephanie McMahon. Just as The Shield came down to the ring, The Big Show started asking Triple H why they were there, and was cut off by the production team.

 

The ring then went dark, indicating a commercial break. Triple H, who was visibly irritated, was given a production headset (with microphone) and he began to talk with the team in the back about what was happening. Everyone in and around the ring seemed confused. McMahon went over to the Big Show and talked to him about the situation, going back and forth between him and Triple H.

 

It's unknown what the exact issue was, but it appeared to throw everyone off. Once the show came back from commercial the segment continued as if nothing happened.

 

Credit: WrestlingRumors.net