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Great Wrestling Promo Transcripts


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I was eight years old at Minnesaukee Elementary School playing a game of 'kill the guy with the ball' (it may even be an Olympic sport these days) and in chasing one of the other students, I made a leap for his legs, and the back of his foot kicked me in the lip. And I didn't know what happened; I knew it hurt, Jimmy, I knew it hurt bad, but all of a sudden people started looking at me in a different way like there was something wrong with me. I looked down at my Chicago Bears sweat-shirt, back in the days when they were two and twelve, in the waning days of Dick Butkus, and my Chicago Bears white sweatshirt had suddenly turned red and children were running from me, scared, ah, I was bleeding, i was in pain, and i was loving it! Beacuse i felt like i'd finally found something in my life that i could do better than everybody else. Handle pain. Someone said 'Oh, that's just vampire blood,' and then saw the open wound from which the blood was flowing. I've still got that shirt, Jimmy, and i remember thinking wouldn't it be nice if i could do something in my life where i could do this all the time? Get that attention every night. Stockbrokers can't do it. teachers can't do it. The President of the United States can't bleed for a living! But pro wrestlers can. It's the first time that i realized that i had a calling in my life, and i followed it right down the line. That's all i wanted to do. My brother and i watched them all- Chief Jay Strongbow, Bruno Sammartino, the Valiant Brothers, that's what we wanted to be. Then i broke his nose by backdropping him into his bedroom wall and Mom said no more wrestling, but she didn't say no more dreaming.

 

 

J.R-Well, Mick Foley continued to pursue his dream, but he paid a heavy price, the emotional scars of his strange childhood are still evident.

 

Mankind- You know, i want to tell my son, when he gets to be fifthteen, not to be the guy that eats strange things. I never exactly brought it upon myself; other people in their cliques, for lack of a better word, they would gang up on me because i was different, looked different. They were throwing worms at me. Bending down in atheltic class, doing my hurdler's stretch, and there was a bombardment of worms begin thrown at me. So what do you do to retaliate? You throw the worm back? At seven or eight people? It's not the fact they were hurting me, they were wounding my pride. They were looking at me like i was garbage. So i picked up the largest specimen, Jimmy, and i sucked it down! To show them that their attempts to hurt my pride would not be sucesful. I thought, Jimmy, that i'd show them, but thensure enought the story became as everything in life does and it no longer became 'Well Mickey Foley ate one worm because some kids were picking on him' it became 'Mickey Foley eats a plate full of worms every day.' Do you think i got many dates after that, Jimmy?

 

J.R- Probably not.

 

Mankind-Do you think girls wanted to kiss a boy who had worms on his breath? I'm a good kisser! But i never got the chance to show it! What am i gonna do, practice on myself, Jimmy? I never had the chance to show the world i could love and could be loved, because they ruled me out because i had a strange appetite for strange things. I'm not going to say i didn't accept money to eat other strange things, but the fact is that damage had been done and i went through my entire high school days without date number one. You don't think that scarred my soul? Well maybe you're not looking deep enough.

 

J.R (Voiceover) - Mickey Foley was searching for a place to belong.

 

Mankind- It was 1983. And upstate New York with its endless rolling fields might be a nice place for a lot of boys, but not when Jimmy Snuka and Don Muraco were in a cage in October in Madison Sqaure Garden- that's where i wanted to be! I didn't want to ride horses along a field, i didn't want to fish for trout in a stream, i wanted to be where the blood and guts were, Jimmy. So i put out my thumb, Jimmy, and it took sixteen or seventeen hours, but i made my way to the Garden. It took just about all the money i had in the world, but i got a front row seat, and i saw the move that would change my life, when Jimmy Snuka came off the top of the cage. And i saw people stand up, and i saw people cheer, and i know i wasn't the only person whose life was changed in that arena. And i realized, Jimmy, that i wanted to do the same thing. I wanted to hear people cheer for me because of some act of bravery that I commited. I wanted to see children cry out of love for me and the things i could do inside a ring.

 

I made a movie when i was eighteen about myself, maybe as a type of escape where i was a wrestler and it's strange, the first time i ever met Shawn Michaels- you know him.

 

J.R- Oh yeah, very well.

 

Mankind- He looked at my scarred and battered body. He didn't know me, but he knew the legend of who i was before, and he said, 'Is this the way you always envisioned yourself?' Looking somewhat down on me. And i said, 'No, you the know the strange thing is i always imagined myself being you.' And he said, 'You mean the champ?' And i said, 'No, i mean the girls.' Jewelry, the tatoos, the love. So in my movie i was not Mick Foley. I sure as hell wasn't Mankind. I was Dude Love.

 

Dude Love tape, November 1983: We are gonna tear this rotten apple right down to its stinking New York core, and while we're here, we're here only one reason, one reason only, fame, honor, fortune, glory, to destruct, destroy, and to take that World Wrestling Federation Championshp Belt...

 

Mankind-And during the course of the movie, dating back to my experience at Madison Square Garden, i decided i was going to do something heroic, i was going to do something to make people cheer for me,so i ascended up onto my friend's roof, and i dove off.

 

J.R (voiceover)- ironically, The Loved One gave Mick Foley his first break; it became an underground hit and somehow wound up in the hands of Dominic Denucci. Denucci admired Mick's guts more than his skill and took him under his wing. Every weekend for the next two years Mick traveled 800 miles round-trip eating and sleeping in the beackseat of his '79 Ford Fairmount still hoping to realize his dream.

 

Mankind- I knew i wasn't ready to be Dude Love yet, i never wanted to be cactus Jack. I figured here is a horrible name for a horrible wrestler, and by golly as soon as i get the ability that i'll get that heart-shaped tatoo on my chest, i'll put those ear-rings in, and i'm gonna get the girls. And it never worked out that way, did it, Jimmy?

 

J.R-Not quite.

 

Mankind- I guess nature didn't cooperate with me. Cactus Jack was supposed to be around for three months. he stayed for eleven years. What made Cactus Jack different was that he just wanted it a little bit more. He was willing to sleep in a filthy car in order to achieve his dreams. He was willing to forgo romantic relationships to be the best. He was somebody in an era of bodybuilder physiques who carved out his own niche, who said i'm gonna make it on my own style, who said 'No one else is gonna tell me what to do, i'm not going to dye my hair. I'm going to be exactly who i am, and i'm going to do it my way.'

 

J.R- Don't you think that it's about time in you life where you looked squarely in the mirror and accepted the personal responsibility for who you are? Don't you believe that you yourself have casued and brought on all these problems?

 

Mankind- I think it's time for you to maybe start doing your damn job. I think it's time for you to end this facade of journalistic integrity. You know what you tell people week in and week out? You say 'Look at Mankind, i don't even know if he feels pain, or maybe he likes pain.' You see you're a powerful man, Jimmy, you have got the ability to reach a lot of people, to spread the truth, and you neglect to do it. Let me ask you a couple of questions. What is it about pain that i love? You see, i feel just like every other person, you see that? [ripping his hair out violently] It hurts! Is it when i can't get up when my little boy sayd, 'Daddy, i want to play ball' and i can't do it? Is that where the fun starts? Is it where a doctor i jects a 12-inch needle into the discs in my spine so i can wrestle one more day? Whoopee! Let the party begin! I can't believe you sit here and ask me those questions. Do i bring it on to myself? I havn't done a damn thing to you. All you've done to people is mislead them and let them think i'm having the time of my goddamned life when i'm in pain! Don't you look at me with that smug look. You make me sick. A man of integrity; I ought to smack you...

 

(Mankind attacks with the mandible claw)

Off-screen voice: Jimmy? Jimmy? Jimmy? Can we get some help?... He's gonna need some help....

 

 

 

Beautiful. Prophetic. Awesome.

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  • 5 months later...
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Nature-Boy, it's me Mick Foley and i'm going to send this message out to you directly, i guess it's a rebuttle of sorts for...claims you made against me two weeks ago on Raw.

 

The first claim i'd like to address is that i took the easy way out in everything during my entire career, a claim that strikes me as quite odd coming from a guy whos claim to authorship consists soley of talking out of the side of his ass while drinking heavily for a couple of days, having a professional ghostwriter record the conversations and then write down things in a book. And then Ric Flair of course, slaps his name on the cover of that book and calls himself an author. Strikes me as being funny seeing as how i actually spent months labouring for hundreds of hours, through sevenhundred and sixty pages of handwritten notebook paper pouring my heart and soul out to become a New York Times Bestseller, a towering bestseller with Have a Nice Day in which i made claims that Ric Flair may have been less than an ideal person to work for back in the mid-nineteen ninetys in WCW. See Ric, i wanna bring you back to a time, Munich, Germany in March of 1994, when you were my boss! Who's kidding who Ric!? You were in charge of my career! And on that night, i got my head tangled up in ropes that were a little bit too tight. I saw blood splattering out onto the blue mats outside. I got back inside that ring and i threw a punch and you know what happened!? MY EAR FELL OFF! IT FELL TO THE GROUND! And by some fluke, a referee who spoke no english, picked it up and handed it off to a ring announcer and tip-toed to the back. He handed it to you Ric Flair and said i've got Cactus Jacks ear. (Remember that name Ric!?) What do you want me to do with it? And Ric Flair suggested we put that ear in a bag of ice and then Ric, you went outside and you know what you saw? Me! In the ring! Still wrestling! DOES THAT STRIKE YOU AS THE EASY WAY OUT!?! I'm a guy who travelled a thousand miles on round-trips every week, to learn this trade. Slept in my car, dined on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches till i felt like puking! To learn! From the bottom up! And then i get accused of not knowing how to wrestle by a guy whos main wrestling hold these days is touching another mans genitilia! Oh yeah, heading into Vengeance Ric, i hadn't been in as much fear of another man since i'd been an altar boy! Oh and then you have the nerve to say you've wrestled every badass there is and i'm not one of them!!! Well tell me this Ric! How much worse could they have messed you up!? These imaginery badasses from your past! How much worse could they have made you bleed!? How much more could your family have cried!? And now you wanna stand there and say when you get in the ring with me it's gonna be all night long, all day long! FIND A NEW CLICHE! YOU USED UP HACK! Because on that day, when i saw your family cry the space you'd occupied inside my mind for fourteen years was gone! You no longer matter to me Ric. You brag about your 16 titles all you want but, i've got titles of my own that count. I'm the hardcore legend! I'm a three-time WWE champion! I'm a two-time, New Yorks times Number one best-selling Author, WRITTEN BY HAND, WITH MY MIND, MY HEART, MY DESIRE! And i've been interviewd twice by Katie Couric. And i'm a personal friend of Melina. And you Ric Flair, whether you like it, WOOO! or whether you don't, learn to live with it, beacuse you get no rematch. You're out of my life you used-up piece of crap!

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"I hope the US loses the war in Iraq and while I'm at it I think the greatest country in the world is France, what do you think? and and you know truth be told I'm not a very big fan of the black people. And if I would go back in time, the one person in history I'd like to make tap out would have to be... Jesus."

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One from the US indys by Eddie Kingston in CZW about hsi fued with Chris Hero:This look familiar to you. This is your car partner. I'm right here, come and get me brother, I've had enough of this. Chris Hero, I went to church the other day (laughs) for the first time in years. And I went up to a priest for a confession and I said "Father, I'm obsessed with an evil man" and the priest said "Is he really evil?" and I said "To me he is". and he goes "What you should be worried about is good men and the indifference they suffer". Then he handed me this card, St. Jude...the patront saint of hopelessness. The patront saint of lost causes...Chris Hero, even God himself doesn't believe that I can beat you. Chris Hero, you've taken everything from me. You took out my brother Black Jack, a man I've known since I was 8 years old who all we dreamed about was being the greatest tag team in the independants, no not just in the independants but in this business and you took him away from me. Then you took away Sabian. Now you took away Robbie. Seriously, you've taken everything from me brother, I'm on my knees right now. I'm on my knees Chris. I'm right in front of your car, Hero. I'm on my knees...give me the match Hero. All I want is one chance Hero, I'm tired of threatening you, saying I'll kill your parents and rape your girlfriend. Hero, I'm begging ya'. LOOK AT ME I'm on my knees! I'm begging for this match 'cause I can't get you outta' my head. You're a demon I need to exorcise Hero so I can move on with my career but not even that move on with my life. You know this is real Hero. Chris, my hatred for you goes beyond wrestling. Hero, I'm begging you I'm on my knees, I'm on the ground, I'm begging you...gimme' that one match. That's all I need. Just one match. *starts punching the ground* Just one match. One match. Hero, please...so I can get you outta' my head. So I can exorcise my demon.

Edited by LaGoosh
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Nitro - 17th February, 1997:

piper1.jpg(Laughing) Roddy Piper LIVE from Alcatraz. Ha. I'm gone man, not even Taz does Alcatraz. (Questions himself) What am I doing here? You know Hogan how hard I worked? (To the toilet) Hogan, Hogan, You listening to me? You know how hard I worked? 28 years I fought. I fought to get a family. Did you ever wonder why I was on the street when I was 13? Did it ever cross your mind, Hogan?I've been dead inside. You know, when you're dead inside, there's nothing you can do to a man to hurt him. Nothing, man. I'm coming into the Cow Palace on the 23rd, dead inside. Why? 'Cause o' you. MR SPANDEX. (Laughs) You are the cheapest, most low life piece of steak I ever seen. Telling people, lie, that I'm hiding behind my little boy. You know, let's get serious about this, 'cause I'm not doing no "Wrestling Promo" to try and draw tickets, no. You know, you know what you used to do Hogan? You little kids, take your vitamins and say your prayers, what happened to that? You know why? 'Cause you

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Shane Douglas face to face with Justin Credible in the ring.

 

ECW CyberSlam at the ECW Arena, April 1999.

 

"Cut the fucking music.

 

You fucking pussy!

 

There's a long and storied story that starts at that front door.

When Terry Funk walked through that door six years ago,

he knew his job was to take Shane Douglas and make him a fucking Franchise.

 

And every single person that's walked through that door in the last six years

has become nothing more than a notch in my belt, Justin Credible.

 

Now if you think that you, punk, if you think that you are gonna make me a notch in your belt?

You got another thing coming, motherfucker.

 

You see: one thing I specialized my whole career. Whether North, South or right here.

I've known when to cross over the fucking line.

 

Hey Justin: There's a fucking line, motherfucker, right in the middle of the ring.

 

If you're man enough, step the fuck over it".

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Rhino @ ECW Guilty As Charged: January 7th 2001

 

(moments after goreing Balls Mahoney, Simond Diamond, Johnny Swinger, Dawn Marie, Chilly Willy and Blue Meanie - then piledriving Jasmin St. Claire from the middle rope)

 

"I'm not done yet.

I'M NOT DONE YET!

 

Oh violence.

VIOLENCE!

I taste violence.

I feel violence.

I live for violence!

 

I've just begun tonight.

I've fuckin' just begun tonight!

 

You know what?

Violence get's me off more than having Jasmin suck my fucking cock.

Violence I love.

 

Tonight I've just begun.

I HAVE JUST BEGUN!!"

 

Not the most articulate way of putting ones point across, but the message was clear and he did go on to win the World Title after the promo, so fair do's. :thumbsup:

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This is a Dusty Rhodes promo from Summerslam '90. The set up (if you know the back story, just skip down to THE PROMO~!)

 

~

 

Sweet Sapphire had been receiving mystery presents from someone but nobody knew who it was. Dusty and Sapphire had been feuding with King Savage and Queen Sherri. At Summerslam, Sapphire was to wrestle Sherri and Dusty scheduled to wrestle Savage.

 

But on the night, Sapphire couldn't be found. She no-showed against Sherri, so Sherri won the match by forfeit. Nobody knew where Sapphire was, but Dusty was looking. So was Jim Duggan:

 

(Dusty is being interviewed in the back by Mene Gene. Hacksaw, totally at random, walks in)

 

Dusty: "Hey Hacksaw, have you seen Sapphire?"

 

Hacksaw: "NO I HAVEN'T DUST, BUT WE'RE ALL STILL LOOKING FOR HER." (randomly leaves)

 

~

 

Later, there was a sighting of Sapphire going into her dressing room but she wouldn't open the door. Dusty tried but failed. He then had to wrestle Savage but, after some cheating, he was defeated by the King.

 

Then:

 

We quickly cut to Sean Mooney again who says that he tried to follow DiBiase to interview him "but he was too quick for me." Nice job there. DiBiase's limo is in the parking lot and out come Virgil, Sapphire and DiBiase. Dusty then LEGS IT to the back but the limo drives off. "SAPPHIRE! SAPPHIRE!"

 

"Alas," says Mooney, "Dusty Rhodes can not stop the car and we leave a very distressed...American Dream."

 

~

 

Then, THE PROMO~! :

 

(Dusty is in the back, interviewed by Mene Gene.)

 

"What I call it Gene is EMOTIAAAN. This great sport and the World Wrestling Federation is built on EMOTIAAAAN. Sapphire took the moneeeeh, that's fiiiine. (pause)

 

I offered up my INNOCENCE to her, she paid me back in SCORN, NOW only AMERICA can give me shelter from the storm. And I am in a storm, baby. And walking out towards that cadillac and many thousands of fans were screaming "when you gonna get MAD Big Dust, when you gonna get BAD Big Dust, when you gonna get EEEEVEN Big Dust?" And Ted DiBiase, the Million Dollar Man, the man that can buy anything BUT Dusty Rhodes the American Dream, BUT the American way of life that lives in this heart! Ted DiBiase I'm getting BAD baby and I'm comin' for you! (storms off)"

 

~

 

It's such a good promo. Afterwards, I really wanted to see Dusty-DiBiase, although I'm not sure they ever did that on a P.P.V.

Edited by robgomm
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"when you gonna get MAD Big Dust, when you gonna get BAD Big Dust, when you gonna get EEEEVEN Big Dust?"

I love that line, it still gives me chills when I hear it. This is a perfect example of how even when someone is lumbered with an awful gimmik they can get themselves over if they have the raw passion, emotion and charisma that the Dream has in spades.
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Paul Heyman shoots on the TNN Network

 

'And since this show is apparently going to make it to air this week, I'd like to take this moment to thank you for watching ECW, you have to be an ECW fan to watch this show because God knows the network has never put out one freaking commerical or one press release to let you know that we're here, but that's their scheme of things. You see in just a few weeks the network is going to give one hundred million dollars to Vince McMahon, like he needs it, to replace us, if they haven't thrown us off before then. And the fact of the matter is that we're not a publically funded company like Vince McMahon or WCW, we survive, or even thrive, on your support and for that we thank you.

 

Now, in an industry where everybody wants to be real, and everybody wants to do a shoot, this my friends is a shoot. We hate this stinking network, we hate their guts for abandoning us, we hate their guys for not supporting us, we hate their guts for not advertising us and we hate their guts for not having the balls to throw us off the air. And in case you're watching this, hey network I dare ya to throw me off the air, because I'm going to break every rule you put in front of me until you throw me the Hell off the air.

 

Now this my friends is a shoot, you better take that one hundred million dollars, that you're going to give Vince McMahon and you better spend it on attorneys because I promise you network, the war has just begun.'

 

 

Arn Anderson 'My Spot' Promo

 

(On Commentary) Bobby Heenan: A standing ovation, look at that.

 

(In-Ring) Mean Gene Okerlund: Its a pleasure to hold a microphone up for you Mr. Anderson on this occasion

 

Arn Anderson: Well Gene all I can tell ya, to get a response like this it means that what I gotta say tonight mean that much more, ya see I'm a realist and everybody knows I've got average size and speed and average ability but I've parlayed that into what I would call a very successful career. And I did that on sheer will alone. But another reality is that four months ago, they took four vertebrae outta my neck, consequently I'm left with a hand, my left hand, too weak to hold a glass, too weak to button a button. But I thought in my mind, I knew in my mind that I could overcome that to through sheer will, and I was doing just like that. I think I've comeback a long way but the other day I had something happen in the gym that was like a cold slap of reality, a guy about your size Mean Gene came up, slap me on the back and said 'Hey Double A, where you been, we haven't seen you on TV?' and just that slap sent a jolt through me and I dropped the drink I was drinking and just for a second my system shut down and it became crystal clear as I watched the few little drops draining out of that bottle, the symbolism that was involved. It was like someone had turned an hour glass over and the sand was running out on the career of Arn Anderson. Now the fact of the matter is, not only do I put myself in a suicide situation by trying to wrestle again, I endanger these two men's careers (pointing at Benoit and McMichael) and I respect them too much for that. And being anything than the enforcer in my best friend's eyes (puts arm on Flair's shoulder), I'd rather walk away. And for all you people out there, that have ever bought a ticket to see Arn Anderson wrestle, whether you loved me... Or you hated me, you knew that when that bell rang you got all I had that night, whether I won, whether I lost, I gave you everything I had and you knew that. And when you did this to me (Gives the Horsemen sign) that was your acknowledgement, well the fact is I have nothing left to give. And I want you to remember me as I was, not as I am. But being the man that I am, my last act, formerly as a Horsemen, I got one last challenge. And that's to you Curt Hennig. Now don't misunderstand me, its not for a fight. You got something special, I've seen you in this ring, your skills, your maturity, your commitment to excellence, makes you something special. And what my challenge is to you, Curt, is stand beside my best friend, Ric Flair, and lead these two men (points at Benoit and McMichael) and lead the Four Horsemen back to the prominence that they once had. And I'm a tell you what your prize is, its not a spot with the Horsemen, because this is worth a lot more than that to me, I'm gonna give you the only thing I've got left, not a spot, not a spot... I'll give you, my spot.

 

Mean Gene Okerlund: Curt Hennig?

 

Curt Hennig: Ya know, I know every wrestler that has ever been around or involved in this business that we call wrestling, who would pass up the honour to not only be a Horsemen but to come out and take Arn Anderson's spot, as the Enforcer of the Four Horsemen, I have only one thing to say... It would be a priviledge.

Edited by Natural Born Thrilla
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