Jump to content

Lockdown Confessional


Frankie Crisp

Recommended Posts

  • Paid Members
9 hours ago, Chest Rockwell said:

Is it anti-Semitic to give magpies Jewish names?

They are the names of a couple who live near my parents. I’d named Mervyn first and then my mum joked about the other one being Sylvia.

In real life, Mervyn and Sylvia were a couple of swingers back in the day. They had a live-in “lodger” called Brian and Sylvia would always be hanging skimpy underwear and leather accompaniments on the washing line.

This has no relationship to me naming the magpie Mervyn...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members
19 minutes ago, johnnyboy said:

Pampas Grass out the front or is that an urban legend?

It’s a terraced house so not in this instance. I’ve heard of that before as well but am yet to see actual evidence.

19 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

I set up a trail cam in the yard to see what wildlife visit and there are Magpies who visit early morning. One of them picks up cat biscuits in his beak, then dips them in water before eating them!

I’ve been putting out cat biscuits too. Not seen then doing this. They also seem to really like grapes but throw away anything else I’ve put out like pita bread or crackers.

Edited by Monkee
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members

You are getting more magpies in gardens feeding because there is less roadkill for them to scavenge because of lockdown. 

We've certainly had an increase in a lot of the larger corvids, rooks, ravens, jackdaws,crows, and magpies as well as some of the fattest bastard wood pigeons you've ever seen. 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Lion_of_the_Midlands said:

You are getting more magpies in gardens feeding because there is less roadkill for them to scavenge because of lockdown. . 

 

I wouldn't know about that now. Apart from the first 3 weeks of lockdown, I have been working throughout and I do a lot of driving. It's gone from the roads being really quiet, but the past few weeks the roads seem just as busy as any other time. Not quite up to full summer time busy, because there's not the caravans and campers clogging up the roads, but there are a lot of people out and about now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators

Magpie ls are up there with Grey Squirrels for scum air rifle fodder. 

I've put a bird house up and there were some lovely blue tits in there. Magpies trash the nest and evict them. Also Grey Squirrels like to take the eggs. 

 

I love animals, but I'll fucking shoot greys and magpies all day long. 

Edited by PowerButchi
Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Lion_of_the_Midlands said:

You are getting more magpies in gardens feeding because there is less roadkill for them to scavenge because of lockdown. 

We've certainly had an increase in a lot of the larger corvids, rooks, ravens, jackdaws,crows, and magpies as well as some of the fattest bastard wood pigeons you've ever seen. 

 

Seen no end of magpies recently. One of the dogs was growling at the bottom of the garden the other night so I went to investigate, turned out one of the wood pigeon babies that was in the tree had fallen out and hit a few branches on the way down. Took it to the nearest rescue  centre and phoned them the next day to see how it was. Fucker died in the night. 

Should have just let the dogs eat it. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members

A few weeks ago my four year old found a big frog in the corner of the garden. There’s no water anywhere near us so fuck knows where he came from

As a father and daughter bonding experience i thought we should help the frog, so I got a shovel, my little girl got her toy shovel, and we spent the next 30 mins digging a really small pond in the border of the garden. We put a plastic sheet over it with bricks to keep it down and filled it with water, nothing special but it held the water ok. 

I picked the frog up and immediately dropped it on it’s head on to the patio. I quickly picked it up again and it started peeing everywhere. It was like I was running around with a hose going off, no idea where all this pee was coming from. I placed it down on the side of the pond and within thirty seconds my cat picked it up and ran off. To quote Alan Partridge the atmosphere turned rrrrrrrather sour and the bonding exercise with my daughter turned into her blaming me for the slaughter of Frank the frog. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 minutes ago, waters44 said:

A few weeks ago my four year old found a big frog in the corner of the garden. There’s no water anywhere near us so fuck knows where he came from

As a father and daughter bonding experience i thought we should help the frog, so I got a shovel, my little girl got her toy shovel, and we spent the next 30 mins digging a really small pond in the border of the garden. We put a plastic sheet over it with bricks to keep it down and filled it with water, nothing special but it held the water ok. 

I picked the frog up and immediately dropped it on it’s head on to the patio. I quickly picked it up again and it started peeing everywhere. It was like I was running around with a hose going off, no idea where all this pee was coming from. I placed it down on the side of the pond and within thirty seconds my cat picked it up and ran off. To quote Alan Partridge the atmosphere turned rrrrrrrather sour and the bonding exercise with my daughter turned into her blaming me for the slaughter of Frank the frog. 

That's going to be bought up in therapy later on in life isn't it?

My daughter STILL brings up when I accidentally booted a dead mouse high up in the air when we were playfully kicking up autumn leaves when she was 4. 

That was nearly 7 years ago.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...