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A stiff shot to the pills- A peurile MMA discussion


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Posted

I was just thinking earlier about who some of my MMA cult heroes were and I remembered Alessio Sakara. Not for his long career as a UFC Middleweight mid carder who stuck around for longer than he should, presumably as a favour to ATT where he was camped. No Sakara will live forever in my memory for having one of the most memorable debuts in my time as an MMA fan, although not one you'll find on his official record.

At UFC 55 Sakara made his promotional debut against journeyman Roy Faircloth. Rogan and Goldberg were typically effusive in their praise for Sakara as a top prospect coming in. As such Sakara looked excellent for the first 5 minutes, clearly the better man in every range he punished Faircloth, who did well to survive the round. In the second they come out with Faircloth looking surprisingly composed. Sakara throws a 1-2 as a rangefinder. Faircloth however has his range on point and hoofs Sakara straight in the plums with a pinpoint 'inside leg kick'. Straight away,  Sakara's hands drop to his sides, he turns away 90 degrees and sinks to his knees like Willem Dafoe in Platoon, if Willem Dafoe had been shot in the cock, not the back. What follows is a few minutes of by turn horrific/ hilarious footage of Sakara screaming, wretching and writhing on the floor intercut with footage of the fight ending shot, culminating in the priceless image of Sakara being walked from the ring with a teammate holding an ice pack over his victimised plums.

To this day, amongst my friends Sakara has always been affectionately known as 'Cockshot' and held a status far exceeding his comparatively ordinary record.

What are some of other people's favourite examples of low blows in MMA? I've a few but I want to see if they come up first. 

 

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Posted

Interesting you mention it - I thought you made this post off the back of wand's post of the Matt Hughes/Frank Trigg fight, as he mentioned that Hughes was in charge right until Trigg landed one right in the fork and got away with it.

Posted
2 hours ago, Carbomb said:

Interesting you mention it - I thought you made this post off the back of wand's post of the Matt Hughes/Frank Trigg fight, as he mentioned that Hughes was in charge right until Trigg landed one right in the fork and got away with it.

I watched that fight a couple of weeks ago, but never really think of it in those terms purely because Hughes turned it around.

There are several fighters who are cult favourites with my friends and I for either delivering (The Reem), or taking (Chris Tuchsherer), catastrophic damage below the belt.

My other iron plummed hero, was Japanese Pro Wrestler and madman Alexander Otsuka, who had a surprising run of showings against top level guys at the time before meeting Murilo Ninja Rua at Pride 27. During the first round Otsuka takes a helacious knee to the groin that dropped him and split his cup. The fight was ruled a no contest.Essentially paralyzed by pain Otsuka was stretchered to the back amid speculation of lacerations to the nethers.

The real crux of the story however, is that because Pride was essentially the Wild West, the fight was restarted later in the card. Otsuka heroically came out to face Ninja despite being severely compromised. He got fucking battered like, but what a man!

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Posted

Fair play to Otsuka, but going back in against Ninja was an insane thing to do. You couldn't go up against either of the Ruas in their prime in anything less than best condition. Being Japan, it's not really a surprise, though - the sporting culture is very similar to the old British style of "wins and losses don't matter - it's showing up that counts". Although with Japan it's less about having "good form" and more about showing "fighting spirit".

Posted
28 minutes ago, Carbomb said:

Fair play to Otsuka, but going back in against Ninja was an insane thing to do. You couldn't go up against either of the Ruas in their prime in anything less than best condition. Being Japan, it's not really a surprise, though - the sporting culture is very similar to the old British style of "wins and losses don't matter - it's showing up that counts". Although with Japan it's less about having "good form" and more about showing "fighting spirit".

Also Pride being Pride I suspect some less than savoury characters probably had a vested interest in the fight!

Posted
5 minutes ago, ReturnOfTheMack said:

Surely Keith Hackney vs Joe Son from UFC 4.

 

 

I'm not that familiar with the really early UFC'S but I nearly titled this thread 'Testicular Fortitude', after seeing that I wish I had!

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Posted

The ones I immediately thought of have already been mentioned or at least alluded to. Hackney vs Son is the obvious answer. And knowing what we know now about Son, it’s poetic justice that he got his bollocks smashed into a paste.

The other two are ones Brody hinted at. Overeem destroying Mirko’s Cro Cock. And Gonzaga battering Chris Tuchscherer’s sack to smithereens.

I don’t have a favourite because I only wish that kind of excruciating bollock pain on nonces and Frank Mir. But below is probably my least favourite because it came seconds into the fight and robbed us of what surely would’ve been a bonkers scrap between Wanderlei Silva and Gilbert Yvel. 

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Posted

Low blows never make me wince for some reason. Eye pokes, however, legitimately frighten me. 

In the spirit of the thread though:

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Sergei suffered a hemorrhoid as a result of the kick and was in great discomfort for weeks afterwards. 

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Posted

If Sergei’s recent comments on Coronavirus are anything to go by, maybe it somehow effected his intelligence as well. 

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Posted

Not MMA but I feel like I can’t let this thread go by without mentioning the king of all bollock massacres in combat sports - Andrew Golota vs Riddick Bowe in 1996. Both fights. 

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Poor fuck. That’s the end of the first fight. And it wasn’t just that one shot. Golota destroyed Bowe’s balls with a sustained assault over the course of the fight and this was the last straw that finally forced the disqualification. It was so bad that it caused a full on riot at Madison Square Garden. 

They did the rematch a few months later and the same thing happened again. This time Golota ended it by going with a 3 hit combo to the spuds that M Bison would be proud of. 

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I mean, there are easier methods of contraception but probably none more effective than that.

Oddest thing about it was these were clearly not accidental low blows but, aside from suffering a knockdown in the rematch, Golota was bossing both fights and had no reason to do this. Even Bowe has said Golota had him beat both times and squandered it by being a fucking dummy. Still baffles me.

Anyone who hasn’t seen it should check out HBO’s Legendary Nights episode on this subject.

What an odd bastard Golota was. I’m off to watch Lennox Lewis smashing him in a round again. 

Posted

I'm a big fan of Charles Oliveira, and a main reason for that is his second UFC fight, where he copped quite a low blow from Efrain Escudero. Most fighters are quite compromised and tentative following a groin strike, but not Oliveira. He was PISSED after it happened, and promptly choked the TUF alum out moments after the restart. Thought it was badass how the low blow essentially spurred him on to furiously finish the fight in seconds.

Can't find a video unfortunately.

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Posted

Another one I’ve just thought of. Cheick Kongo vs Mustapha Al-Turk, December 2008 at UFC 92. Al-Turk hurts Kongo bad with a knee to the nuts, there’s a time out while Kongo tries to recover. The ref restarts them and Kongo immediately knees Al-Turk straight in the balls.

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It was the most obvious receipt ever.

Actually, didn’t Kongo also pulverise Cro Cop’s nuts with knees? I haven’t watched that fight in years, for very obvious reasons, but that’s my main memory of it. 

Posted
3 minutes ago, wandshogun09 said:

Actually, didn’t Kongo also pulverise Cro Cop’s nuts with knees? I haven’t watched that fight in years, for very obvious reasons, but that’s my main memory of it. 

Aye.

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Also against Overeem in Dream. 

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