Wedding Planning / Marriage Thread

[Keith Houchen]

[Grecian]

I got married on the beach in Barbados. We looked at a few venues in Bath and were being quoted thousands. In the end, we decided to do it abroad, hotel sorted everything, all I had to do was turn in appropriate attire (shirt, loose trousers and flip-flops) say I do and done. 

I'd genuinely recommend this to anyone getting married, takes all the stress and politics of table seating and not inviting relatives you detest right out of the equation. 

[Bus Surfer]

Me and the misses have been together 10 years. We've lived together since 2011 and a few years back we got a mortgage on a nice little house and a cat. 

Ever since we got together I'd always expressed my negative thoughts on marriage. I'm just not into all the fuss. The idea of being the center of attention (for however short it may be) fills me with dread to the point that I'm sat there sweating... Just thinking about it. I suffer with anxiety and the idea of a 'special day' just leaves me a mess. 

 

Anyways, a few years back we were at a family gathering and her mother (a few glasses of wine deep) says "I wouldn't care if you two went away and got married, that would be fine", and the misses seemed to agree. 

Now I love this girl will all my heart and want to be with her for aslong as my days last, so I decide to buy a ring and propose on the basis of our eloping wedding to be. 

Months later I propose on her birthday and its a really lovely day, I was bawling my eyes out and so was she. Problem is, the idea of 'just the 2 of us' seems to have disappeared and a small wedding with family is what she wants. This was 3 years ago now and we're no closer at all to getting anything done. I've expressed my feelings about it but we never seemed to get anywhere. Now we barely speak about it anymore, despite being very happy with no issues that I'm aware of.  Her brothers and cousins all seem to be getting married at the moment, so it's squeaky bum time constantly and I'm waiting for her to mention it. 

I fucked up lads, I fucked up. 

 

[Bus Surfer]

9 minutes ago, johnnyboy said:

Can you book a holiday and do a surprise wedding while away?

I suggested similar things which have all been shot down. She doesn't wanna go away and wants moderate amounts of family there. If I pulled something whilst away she wouldn't be happy with that. 

Another issue is that I have an incredibly small family (years of my parents butning bridges with everyone) and she has a fucking army of a family. Everytime we go to a family event there's another person that I haven't met yet. 

I've been told by others (not once her) that I'm selfish and the big day should be about her, but seriously? Fuck that. I'm a part of this too and don't see why my feelings, fears and wishes should be stamped on. 

 

[Statto]

On 10/8/2018 at 1:31 PM, Rey_Piste said:

Put the word wedding in front of anything and prices immediately triple. You can get a plain white three tiered cake for under 60 notes. Chuck a couple of plastic people on top and you are pay around 200 for the same thing.

Ain't that the truth.

I got married in April, my first choice of venue was the crypt of old Blackfriars friary church here in Norwich, because a) I wrote my MA dissertation on the Blackfriars in Norfolk & b) Blackfriars Hall is where the Norwich Beer Festival is held, which is my favourite week of the year.

I think the hourly rental rate for the room (which holds about 40 people, BTW) quoted on the website is about £80. Emailed them about hire, foolishly mentioned the word wedding, they wanted nearly £4k! It might be a secular building now, but money grabbing is clearly still the main function!

Ended up getting married in a pub/restaurant near home which did it all with no room hire cost, just on minimum spend for food/drink, which we hit easily.