Paid Members BomberPat Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 41 minutes ago, Kaz Hayashi said: Umbrellas held by humans. Once a brolly is unsheathed and opened, its human operator transforms in to a complete fucking gargoyle. They forget basic fundamentals such as âother peooleâ. Yeah, fuck umbrellas. Being of only slightly above average height for where I live, the points of every umbrella I encounter are all at precisely eyeball height, and no fucker tries to get out of my way, so I'm forced to step into the road to avoid the bloody things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 6 minutes ago, BomberPat said: Yeah, fuck umbrellas. Being of only slightly above average height for where I live, the points of every umbrella I encounter are all at precisely eyeball height, and no fucker tries to get out of my way, so I'm forced to step into the road to avoid the bloody things. Mind the puddles! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Bellenda Carlisle Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 I don't think that's a trivial thing, umbrellas are a menace. I'm over 6 foot and live in London and I've had oblivious shortarses nearly blind me more times than I can remember. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brewster McCloud Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 Surely these are far more practical, if you're that concerned about the rain? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 That what you wear, like? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brewster McCloud Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 No, I like the rain. If it's really heavy I don't walk around in it, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members tiger_rick Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 4 minutes ago, Brewster McCloud said: No, I like the rain. If it's really heavy I don't walk around in it, though. Don't blame you, ground could be a real quagmire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members tiger_rick Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 Continuing the work theme, we work in a managed building and the fucking lazy bastards in the other offices really wind me up. * People who don't wipe tea & coffee off the kitchen work surfaces * People who clean stuff on the work surfaces and even the floor with a tea towel (we never use this manky tea towel) * People who put stuff in a fridge and leave it until something grows out of it and puts itself in the bin * People who put plastic, card and paper in the general bin when there is a clearly marked recycling bin one inch away * People who leave pots in the sink and not the dishwasher * People who do a massive shit and don't clean the toilet * People who go to the toilet and don't wash their hands It's basically a (never) grown up version of a student house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 19 minutes ago, Brewster McCloud said: No, I like the rain. If it's really heavy I don't walk around in it, though. I doubt anyone really enjoys walking around in heavy rain to be fair, most people you see in it are there because they have to be somewhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brewster McCloud Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 People are so hasty these days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sphinx Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 They run and hide their heads. They might as well be dead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Accident Prone Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 24 minutes ago, tiger_rick said: Office Animals 100% applicable to my office. An email went round the other week about people leaving used bowls and spoons (actual cutlery) in the toilet bins. People scoffing down their Shreddies whilst on the bog and then not being arsed to carry them back to the kitchen? I guess? The absolute state of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gus Mears Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 39 minutes ago, tiger_rick said: * People who do a massive shit and don't clean the toilet As an addition to this, people who decide to shit as loudly as possible when others are in the bathroom. Can you just hold on for twenty seconds before unleashing the guttural belch of hell? Especially as there is no escape vent in the bogs where I work, so it makes you have to sprint out the door with your face in your sleeve like someone has just fired mustard gas through the window. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brewster McCloud Posted October 15, 2018 Share Posted October 15, 2018 3 minutes ago, Gus Mears said: As an addition to this, people who decide to shit as loudly as possible when others are in the bathroom. Can you just hold on for twenty seconds before unleashing the guttural belch of hell? Especially as there is no escape vent in the bogs where I work, so it makes you have to sprint out the door with your face in your sleeve like someone has just fired mustard gas through the window. By the same token, people who linger for too long at the sink (sometimes even holding a conversation!) while I'm clenching like a bastard in the cubicle in the frantic hope of not bescumbering the pan with the apocalypse brewing in my colon while they are within earshot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Scott Malbranque Posted October 15, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 15, 2018 (edited) I've said it before and I say it again: 1) People eating apples, pears or crisps in a confined public setting. 2) The anticipation faces on a person as they are about to eat/drink soup off a spoon. Extra cunt points if the spoon clanks against their teeth. 3) People who cup their cup of tea with both hands, blow it, then slurp it anyway and slam the cup down as if it's 1am in a nightclub and they've done a shot of tequila. Â Edited October 15, 2018 by Scott Malbranque Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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