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Michael Owen Is A Boring Twat 2: Never Had A Cuppa


Devon Malcolm

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23 hours ago, Scott Malbranque said:

You need to bring some milk to the boil in a pot (or via microwave), add two to three teaspoons of Bourneville, stir vigorously until it looks like Bovril, Surf.

Doesn't adding milk defeat the purpose of it being Bourneville?

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15 minutes ago, Nostalgia Nonce said:

Doesn't adding milk defeat the purpose of it being Bourneville?

But adding water defeats the purpose of it tasting any good, though.

 

Honestly, I know it sounds all "Carbomb's a posho, lolz", but genuinely, your best bet is raw cacao. You can get it on Groupon really cheap, and it's good stuff. It takes more time to make cocoa with it, but it is truly worth it if you want a delicious dark chocolate drink with a deep flavour. It still requires a little milk (all chocolate does), but you can make it as bitter or sweet as you like.

I got a massive great bag of the stuff off Groupon, and it really is the best chocolate drink I've ever had. I put about four or five spoonfuls in a saucepan with a little milk to make it into a thick paste, and then heat it up on a medium heat for a few minutes to properly cook the cacao - you can tell when, as you get a strong, rich chocolate aroma - before adding milk/water and heating it until it until it's as hot as you want it. Add sugar/syrup to taste, and there you go! In cold weather, I sometimes add cinnamon and/or nutmeg to the powder before making the paste.

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27 minutes ago, Nostalgia Nonce said:

Doesn't adding milk defeat the purpose of it being Bourneville?

If you want a cup of brown slop that looks like stomach flu but tastes something akin to dark chocolate then, yes, it defeats the purpose. But even adding that pink cartoned slimline milk every girl in my job uses, turns its own arse up and makes it taste gorgeous.

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