Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted August 24, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 24, 2018 Well, the other thread is Golded so take a look at this:- Do you know ANYONE like this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gus Mears Posted August 24, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 24, 2018 I always wondered what Father Stone did after being struck by lightning and plainly he embarked upon a career in professional football. I mean, that has to be a lie. I can't see any way it isn't. The fact he's lying about something so catastrophically boring is almost worse than it being true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Danger Posted August 24, 2018 Share Posted August 24, 2018 That one popped up on his appearance on Mr and Mrs. He went straight from his mum to his girlfriend/wife who have always done everything for him. Odd man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted August 24, 2018 Author Paid Members Share Posted August 24, 2018 Surely everyone has their first cuppa when they're a kid? Is his mum also so boring that she never made him a cup of tea? He's so weird. He seems so oblivious of how weird he is, like nobody has ever gone up to him and said, "You don't like films or reading or tea or coffee? You're mental!" He also seems so proud of the fact that he has his mum and wife do everything for him. How would you put up with living with Michael Owen? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gus Mears Posted August 24, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 24, 2018 17 minutes ago, Devon Malcolm said: How would you put up with living with Michael Owen? Money. That and the fact that you wouldn't have to ever sleep with him because he hates sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted August 24, 2018 Moderators Share Posted August 24, 2018 I assume he sleeps in a cupboard standing up like Bender so you wouldn't even have to share a bed with him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Astro Hollywood Posted August 24, 2018 Moderators Share Posted August 24, 2018 I've never drunk tea or coffee, but I have watched loads of films, so I'm extremely normal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RancidPunx Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 I’ve never eaten a Big Mac in my life. People think that’s weird . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted August 25, 2018 Moderators Share Posted August 25, 2018 That's not that weird. It's a single particular menu item from one chain fast food place. If you said you've never had a burger that would be weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Kaz Hayashi Posted August 25, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 25, 2018 “Crunchy nut cornflakes... have somma that.” Cunt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Lion_of_the_Midlands Posted August 25, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 25, 2018 After his football career Michael Owen owned a racehorse called Brown Panther. If he was to read The Joy Of Shitting thread on here I doubt it would occur to him to call his morning shit "Letting Brown Panther out for his morning gallop" The boring bastard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Kaz Hayashi Posted August 25, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 25, 2018 Even Frank Skinner and co on Absolute Radio are discussing his lies. They’re basically calling it odd and can’t get their heads around it even being possible, to never have had a hot drink. Because let’s be honest, if he’s never had tea or coffee, there’s no way in hell he’s had a Horlicks or a Bovril. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Astro Hollywood Posted August 25, 2018 Moderators Share Posted August 25, 2018 46 minutes ago, Kaz Hayashi said: Even Frank Skinner and co on Absolute Radio are discussing his lies. They’re basically calling it odd and can’t get their heads around it even being possible, to never have had a hot drink. That's because everyone's a fucking weirdo who has to constantly be clasping a mug of tea or coffee, or putting the kettle on, or asking people if they want one, or harping on about it, in some worldwide case of OCD where they'll simply die if there isn't a hot mug within grasping distance. The only hot drink I've ever had is soup, you bunch of animals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted August 25, 2018 Moderators Share Posted August 25, 2018 I think it's pretty unadventurous to have never even tried it tbh. I don't care if anyone doesn't like hot drinks but to have never tried one, and then wear it like some badge of honour as if it makes you more interesting is just ridiculous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Kaz Hayashi Posted August 25, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted August 25, 2018 31 minutes ago, Astro Hollywood said: That's because everyone's a fucking weirdo who has to constantly be clasping a mug of tea or coffee, or putting the kettle on, or asking people if they want one, or harping on about it, in some worldwide case of OCD where they'll simply die if there isn't a hot mug within grasping distance. The only hot drink I've ever had is soup, you bunch of animals. You’re 1 hot liquid more interesting than Michael Owen then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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