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Banish Belated Backlash Boredom by Reviewing Random Riots


Onyx2
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Seems like a lot of the forumites are in the doldrums after a wafty finish to the latest PPV. What better way to pick up your spirits than be transported to another time and review a match plucked from the ether. 

I'm using this generator to pull random matches from the Network. You might get Austin v Bret, you might get Rumble 1992, you might get Aksana v Alicia Fox. 

I just rolled... 🎲 

BRUISER BRODIE VS ABDULLAH THE BUTCHER WITH GARY HART 
WCCW 291 | WCCW | 1987-07-25

So I'm off to watch that. Will post my review in a bit. 

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Good lord.


TEST VS VAL VENIS W/ RIGHT TO CENSOR | watch
EPISODE 86 | SMACKDOWN REPLAYS | 2001-04-12

EDITS: w/ bonus Frosted Hair Michael Cole. Also w/ genuine crowd that's actually into it. It's also a decent match as well.

Edited by seph
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I got Los Matadores Raw debut vs. 3MB (Slater & Mahal) from 30/09/13. Fuck you, @Onyx2

Starts with JBL lying "This is going to be good, Ole". The crowd do "ole" a bit but there's utter silence when the bull comes out to the point you can hear scattered laughter. "That's a little bull" says Michael Cole. "That's a load of bull" replies King. Jinder Mahal has short hair and mystifyingly, lacks muscular definition. He really stepped on the gas after this. One bloke chants "Primo, Primo". There's a pretty contrived monkey flip on Jinder and then a sweet leg sweep on Slater. Matadores perform a double Irish whip with a little pirouette and Jinder is back in to miss with a knee lift by a good six inches. Small boring chant.

It's amazing how solemn Michael Cole is compared to his current commentary. I like this better. Contrived headstand into a swinging head scissors spot. Ugh. Cole calls Diego "Diago". Diago throws himself around a bit. Double slam thing and it's over. The bull jumps about a bit, JBL feigns excitement and Cole moves on quickly. Shit, I forgot this was around that time big Show cried every week and the Authority were insufferable. Stop. Hit stop. Fucking stop!

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