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Room 101 - The Tag Teams


Liam O'Rourke

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So, for this week's podcast we're doing our second show based off the old Room 101 television show, where we're looking for you to submit one nomination for a Tag Team from any point in time that you wish to be banished to oblivion for good, and why you want them in Room 101.

You can be as flexible with the nomination as you like - it can be a certain period of a team's run, or if you really dislike a duo's body of work you can just toss the team in there. You can be obscure as you like in who you choose, it really comes down to the combo that always grinded your gears the most, and your explanation will be key in whether or not the panel agrees on the show to banish your suggestion to Room 101. We've previously done a show hunting for the most useless team, but this is about your personal disfavour.

As always, the best nominations will be read and you'll be credited accordingly. So who has always annoyed you personally enough to go into Room 101 and why?

 

EDIT - The show talking Tag Teams that you voted to go into Room 101 is now available at the following link:

https://squaredcirclegazette.podbean.com/mf/download/d7aa4j/SCG_Radio_112_-_Room_101_Tag_Teams.mp3

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The Ascension – pair of twats.

 

No good matches.

 

Bad look, not even scary.

 

Hideously exposed on the main roster and they weren't even good to begin with.

 

'Konnor' spelt with a K reminds me of the naming pattern used on the Kardashian sisters.

 

'Viktor' - another unecessary 'k'.

 

Would anyone miss them if they were banished to Room 101?

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The Show-Gunns

 

It hurts my brain even thinking about how terrible both Billy Gunn and Big Show both were during this time. Terrible pairing, no chemistry. both looked like they couldn't be arsed, and who could blame them. 

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Even though it was a short-lived pairing its Rene Dupree and Kenzo Suzuki for me. They are always the first team I think of when thinking of bad teams. Odd pairing, pair of rubbish wrestlers and they were given a run with the Tag Team titles which offended me.

 

They weren't interesting, couldn't get it done in the ring and were all round the shits

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Any bastard rehash of an old team especially if they have a 'New' preceding the actual name.

 

The New Rockers ... bleh.

 

The New Blackjacks ... double bleh and made me question my deep yearning for everything Barry Windham.

 

Legion of Doom (The Heidenreich years) ... my Hasbro Hawk shed tears of molten plastic as I burned them due to the sacrilege forced upon me.

 

But my ultimate nomination has to be:

 

The New Midnight Express ... go fuck off immediately, and preferably hurl yourself off a very tall structure with lots of nasty sharp things and/or stingy things at the bottom to cushion your fall so you lead a long horrid life of constant pain and anguish at what you have done.

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2006 era DX. Some of the most cringey stuff in wrestling history - the stuff you'd never want a non-fan to walk in on. Vince Loves Cock, secret BBQ blowjobs, so much mooning... a real black spot on Shawn Michaels' career.

 

 

I'd also like to add the Bollywood Boyz and the team of Tony Nese & Drew Gulak. 205 Live was dead as soon as these four came out for its first ever match and buried as soon as it became clear they intended to put on the most boring cruiserweight match in history. Nobody cares about 205 Live but if this was the first thing they saw, who could blame them?

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I get a feeling I'll be shouted down for this, especially since they've now been advanced as going into the Hall Of Fame, but I just cannot be arsed with the Rock & Roll Express. Even when they're in squash matches which are designed to make the "name" team look strong they only ever seem to be able to do "Ricky's the babyface in peril, Robert comes to the rescue after a hot tag, double dropkick, pin" which makes sense when they're against a team talented enough to make these things look credible such as the Midnights etc, but when it's a pair of Johnny come latelys who've just been thrown together for the purposes of getting the R&R over it looks ridiculous to see an established tag team getting schooled by a pair of individuals with no experience teaming or chemistry.

 

Robert Gibson is a fabulous choice for a tag team wrestler as he can keep an eye on both opponents simultaneously. I didn't used to mind them as a kid, but when I found out from a conversation on that Classic Memphis wrestling show on TWC back in the day they were thrown together in Memphis to give the lads something to do and as an exercise in appealing to a certain demographic so they can still draw money when the Fabulous Ones were unavailable the bloom came tumbling from the rose. Morton looks more like a middle aged mum in a supermarket than a "Rock & Roller" and Gibson looks like he's there for a paycheck. Plus their matches during my retreading through the old NWA Worldwide wrestling shows on the Network are dull dull dull.

 

They most definitely weren't the clean living white meat babyfaces they portrayed in the ring outside the ring by accounts, which further tarnishes them

 

In short I feel like they're the "Koko" of this year's HOF inductees so far and it's only on the length of their careers rather than their charisma as I don't even imagine they'd be able to get much of a nostalgia pop now. I'm now shuddering at the idea of them turning up in tag team turmoil as a change from the Headbangers and their video package consisting of double dropkicks and superman hot tags. 

 

 

If they don't make it in can I propose a discovery I made while I was double checking the reasons for their formation which is the short lived team of The Rock & Rockers team of Robert Gibson and Marty Janetty that sometimes is formed when Morton isn't available.

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Tag Team wrestling has had some absolute stinkers - especially during Smackdown's 04 - 08 run. I know Old Man Jones is particularly passionate about hating the current crop; Hype Bros, Headbangers, Beauty and the Man-Beast etc, but you won't see me nominating them - mostly because I am still  a complete Zack Ryder mark (though Mojo Rawley can die a slow and painful death for all I care) and whilst Heath Slater/Rhyno held the straps for too long, I wasn't that against it. I quite liked his 'Free Agent' run over the summer, and as for the Headbangers, wel, they were only bought in to job...

 

See, I don't think you can ever get worse than groups like The Gymini - remember them? Whilst admittedly, their run wasn't long enough to be too insulting, what I remember being most frustrated by was the fact that for the LONGEST period of time, the only wrestling figures I could find in Woolworths were the god damn Gymini. The shelves were literally filled with them, and no one was buying. You could offer at only £1, and still no one would buy them. I swear, if Woolworths was still around (R.I.P) you would still see this waste of plastic.

 

 

I also have to nominate The Highlanders just for being absolute idiots. Who seriously thought going to a TNA show during Wrestlemania weekend would be a good idea. Whilst it certainly exposes TNA as desperate ('Look - its a "star" from that other brand!!') it also just shows how many brain cells the Highlanders had... none.

 

Corre... Just because of the spelling alone.  In fact add The New Nexus to that.

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It's got to be The Bushwhackers for me.

 

Grave apologies to anyone that grew up with them and for who Cousin Luke and Cousin Butch hold some nostalgic charm but.... no. I'm not saying that there is no place in wrestling for comedy characters but even in childhood I never found anything amusing about their licking each other and sardine-related banter. Every time Jesse Ventura used to refer to them as "the marching morons" I'd nod to myself in quiet agreement. You have to be pretty rubbish to inspire as much hatred in a 10 year old as these idiots did, but along with that other jellybrain Hacksaw Duggan (cheating cunt, hitting people with a fucking plank), Luke and Butch were an instant guarantee I'd be rooting for the heels to murder them dead.

 

When I was getting into wrestling, I developed hero worship very quickly for lots of the "goodies" for various reasons - toughness, strength, cool charisma - but these pair had none of it. I saw absolutely no reason to cheer for them. Their finish was the absolute drizzles too. I knew it was all staged early doors but virtually everything else LOOKED like it hurt or made me understand how it would hurt... the Battering Ram was fucking ludicrous! You never got told off for copying THAT one at school, for a finish it looked like it would hurt less than a decent backdrop!

 

In addition to looking like shit and having a crap finish, they were losers. All the tapes I got hold of for the first couple of years of my fandom, the 'whackers only seemed to exist to get beat. How could anyone get behind these chumps? And the matches were dreadful! Now, I'm not exactly going to say I was a workrate pervert right from the off when it was faces like Warrior, Tatanka and Crush doing the rounds, but Bushwhackers matches were life-drainingly bad, and as you may have quoted me on before, I'm sure that Beverly Brothers match from Rumble 92 is still going on today.

 

In summary, I never found any redeeming qualities to this pair. Apologies to anyone hardcore into their Whacking who may be reading/listening, but The Brain once said "if I managed the Bushwhackers I'd commit suicide" and I feel exactly the same about watching them wrestle.

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I've got a pick that I know will not go down well. Demolition. Their look is just fucking weird, they look like really fucked up pervs. I cannot believe that was allowed on day time tv, I feel uncomfortable watching a match of their back so I don't bother anymore. I would probably let them off if it was just Ax and Smash but once Crush joined their matches went down hill massively. Crush was a shit wrestler and always was. 

 

I agree with Air Raid about the Bush Whackers. I think I found them entertaining for a bit when I was about 6 but within months I lost interest. They were losers and saying the finisher is shit is being quite polite. They looked like a crazy alcoholic you may see outside a train station seeking change, that your parents would tell you not to go near so how could you really support them.

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The Bushwackers were a terrible comedy act, but then you watch their stuff as the Sheepherders and it's like watching a completely different team.

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A very obvious choice but under any guise they are prime shite, Jacob & Eli,  Gerald & Patrick, Jared & Jason, 8 Ball & Skull or just plain Ron & Don, The Harris Boys, 2 clunky god awful bores, these twins brothers carry an uncanny resemblance to a pair of circumcised penises and watching them wrestle is as painful as a circumcision without anaesthetic, they were mainstays on television from the mid-90s to the mid-00s, The awful Blu brothers opened up Wrestlemania 11 to really get the crowd in the mood, they continued to stink up the WWF riding around with Crush and Chainz on their 'beautiful custom titan bikes' before heading down south under the turgid guise of Gerald & Patrick (And i've just realised the Brisco and Patterson connection) 'Creative control' , they weren't done and would join Jeff Jarrett's NWO 2000 shambles, those of us lucky enough to attend the WCW uk tour in 2000 were even treated to them main evening against the Mamalukes, i won't even get into their time in TNA where they apparently now hang around backstage waiting for one more run, looking at the state of that company it may not be long before we get a singles feud between Ronald and Donald.

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They started in Memphis as the Bruise Brothers in 1987 (not to be confused with Porkchop Cash, Dream Machine and Mad Dog Boyd).

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I'm very glad I got into wrestling in 2000 - strictly WWF - so I've never had to witness the abortion that is the Harris Boys. Although listening to the Monday Night War timeline (Right here on SCG Radio - Bang Bang) I feel like, aurally, I have been abused. So yeah, shove them in too

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