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Survivor Series match review thread - 2016 edition

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As there are almost 30,000 words of content already I think it'd be a good idea to get a head start with posting your reviews as is. There are still a few missing so if those could be sent over that would great. I think its necessary as otherwise no fucker will be able to get through them all before Sunday night :D (I'm also going out for the rest of the day which may or may not have influenced this decision..).

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Survivor Series 1987


Contributor: sj5522


Match: The Fabulous Moolah, Rockin' Robin, Velvet McIntyre, and The Jumping Bomb Angels (Itsuki Yamazaki and Noriyo Tateno) vs Sensational Sherri, The Glamour Girls (Leilani Kai and Judy Martin), Donna Christanello, and Dawn Marie (with Jimmy Hart)




Alright, so with women recently main-eventing a PPV and the general upsurge in prestige of women's wrestling in the last couple of years combined with this being the least discussed of the matches on the first Survivor Series I thought it would be good to tackle this match.

So it's 5 years before I was born, this show so in terms of pre-diva women's wrestlers I'm familiar with and enjoy your Alundra Blayze's and Bull Nakano's in the WWF, but the live crowds didn't seem overly invested. I'll look to see if it's any hotter for this one, as well as being a learning experience in that I'm not overly familiar with any woman here as in-ring workers.


We start off with no entrances, all ten women already in the ring. There seems to be a mild hushed boo when Fink announces that this is a women's elimination match - I dunno what they were expecting with ten lasses in the ring. They're introducing the heels first and Jimmy Hart, of course - he is everywhere, is out there with The Glamour Girls - one of them has a look of Audrey from Corrie about her, the other one looks like she presents the ITV game show directly after Corrie circa about 2001...uh, to me anyway. Next introduced is Dawn Marie, not the one that fucked Torrie's dad to death and not related either I assume, in the brief shot of her she reminds me a bit of Carla from Cheers. Donna Christianello next, who is literally your pisshead Aunt, fucking hell, in fact I'm sure she's been on Corrie too. Finally, team captain and Woman's Champion Sensational Sherri who's looking charming in a nice cape type thing.


On to the faces now, and Velvet McIntyre's hair is ace, most of the style sported here are 'mares but I love hers. Rockin' Robin who I can't say the same about takes off the world's blandest grey ring jacket, she just looks like she's happy to be here - on Top Of The Pops. The Jumping Bomb Angels get a nice reaction. And Fabulous Moolah, who it kinda goes without saying, but crikey she was old weren't she? It'd be surreal to see a veteran woman like that now. Gorilla and Ventura joke how Moolah took exception to being weighed at 160lbs.


Ventura makes casual reference to being in a film with Schwarzenegger as Sherri jumps on Velvet McIntyre and we're underway with these two. Go Velvet! I believe in your and your cool hair. Sherri chucks her across the ring a bit, before Velvet ducks under a clothesline and comes off the ropes hitting a nice crossbody on the champ. Babyface!! Tag in to Moolah now and Sherri's immediately scrambling to her corner but isn't allowed to make it. Moolah hits her with some quick offense then shoves Sherri into her corner for some reason. Christianello is tagged in and dragged over the rope by Moolah, taking what must be described as a "shit bump" on the way in. Moolah hits a move that you probably wouldn't see nowadays - a slingshot, but not into a turnbuckle or anything, just on to the mat.


A Jumping Bomb Angel is in now, bounces over the top rope and nails a dropkick to the chest of Our Auntie Donna, but our Auntie then dodges a second dropkick and the Angel tags back out to McIntyre who I've just noticed isn't wearing boots for some reason. A pretty sloppy elbow and Ventura proclaims "y'know, these girls throw the punches and do the moves just as hard as the men do". There's some back-and-forth between Velvet and Donna before Velvet gets up on Donna's shoulders and executes a rolling cover for the 3.


Yer pisshead aunty... HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!


Leilani Kai of the Glamour Girls jumps in, but can't get the better of Velvet as she gets taken down with a headscissors. A tag into Rockin' Robin for the first time in the match, what will she do..what does she have up her sleeve? They test strength and 0.000001 seconds later Robin is dragged into the heel corner. I'm calling it... Rockin' Robin.... YOU'RE NEXT! Well at least she fuckin should be - Dawn Marie is tagged in briefly and roughs her about a bit before another Glamour Girl comes in and Robin hits a shitty, awful, 0/10 crossbody, which the poor Glamour Lass is forced to sell. This Robin does not even hit the ropes well and for the well-being of this match, she has tae go. If she manages to tag out I'll be somewhat miffed. Fuckin' hell, after some quick tags, Dawn Marie's in, Robin hits a 2/10 crossbody this time, and there's a three count.


Carla from Cheers... HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!


Why they've given Robin this elimination I don't know, it's now 5 on 3 to the faces and surely her time in this bout is now ticking down fast.. Ah bloody hell, she's shoved back into her corner and in comes a Jumping Bomb Angel, Kai hits her with a bodyslam, goes for a cover but the JBA (they don't seem to know or be telling me which one it is) executes a cool bridge up before tussling with Kai and getting some neat nearfalls, and the crowd is the most excited it's been yet in this bout. Now the JBA is throwing mad high knees like she's Bryan Danielson before letting out a scream and taking in some appreciation from the crowd. Good stuff! She then hits a 6 or 7/10 crossbody, but only gets a 2-count, showing that only Rockin' Robin has truly mastered the art of the Shit Crossbody.


Double team move now and the other JBA comes off the top rope with a rolling arm-drag, is sent into her corner, and the JBA drags Sherri in over the top rope. The heels need to get their fuckin act together! It's 3 vs. 5 and the Angels are makin' em look like clowns! Double-underhook suplex from the JBA now! Ah, here we go, Rockin' Robin tags in now. You'll regret that, shitarse! Anyway, all the classics are coming out now - crap irish whip! Crap monkey flip! Robin is on fire! Now Sherri is in - basic suplex!! and that's 1-2-3.


Fainted when she got Morrissey's autograph... HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!


Now it's 3 vs. 4 and we'll see if the heels can mount a comeback here. How enjoyable this match is so far is pretty much entirely dependent on who's in the ring, and it's a JBA in with Judy Martin who flings the JBA round through the air by her hair. Velvet's in now and picking up the pace with a spinning crossbody for a near-fall (she's no Rockin Robin), Leilani in now and Velvet hits her with another slingshot into nothing - a popular move at the time apparently. Moolah's in now and a hushed chant for her partially breaks out, she's got the stiff no-bullshit looking offense. The tags are becoming more frequent and inconsequential now. Probably due to time restraints but I've noticed almost all of the tags seem to come from just being shoved or dragged to your own corner by the opponent. So there's no real heat in that regard/no sign of a hot-tag or any other real tag troupees which is a bit of a shame. It's more of an exhibition, which is fine I suppose but having watched the match between Team Honky Tonk and Team Savage before this, it seems obvious to say but a world away in terms of crowd heat.


I'm kind of confused where this match is heading now - Moolah trades some sloppy forearms with Judy Martin then a crap clothesline takes captain Moolah out for the 3!




I like the 3 faces left but have to wonder what's going on after that surprising elimination. The crowd seem a bit miffed at it. The JBAs double-team Judy a bit before Velvet comes in and she's...she's got her in the Walls! Walls of Jericho locked in! Well, a boston crab, of course. No tap- er, no verbal submission yet, Velvet then gets her into another kind of surfboard submission and then turfs her out of it. As Judy Martin looks like she may be the next out, I'd just like to say I no longer think she looks like she presents the game show after Corrie, I now think she looks like she presents the morning show before the Corrie omnibus.. just needed to amend that. She tags Sherri though who takes control of the situation. Really rough looking suplex on Velvet, barely got her up for it. Tag in to Kai who sends Velvet absolutely flying by her hair into her own corner, again. A JBA runs in and we're to assume a tag was made but she's flung to the opposite side of the ring by her hair from Kai. Really nice underhook suplex by Kai, that should be it for even the Jumpiest of Bomb Angels, wait what the fuck? The JBA bridges out at 2, I'm not keen on that first of all, but the timekeeper then goes into business for himself and rings the bell, it's Brock v Taker all over again! The referee waves it off, and we continue, bafflingly as the JBA is allowed to go and tag McIntyre back in.

Velvet has Sherri in position for what I thought would either be apparently these women's favourite move - the slingshot into nothing- or maybe another boston crab. But shitting crikey, it's the Cesaro swing and the crowd are at their highest point yet! Did not see that move coming from the skinny McIntyre at all. Soon she executes another rolling-pin from Sherri's shoulders and has pinned the champ!


Sensational Sherri.. HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!


So, match is finally beginning to take some shape now. I could easily see myself being invested in Velvet pinning the champ, and we're looking at a showdown presumably between the two tag teams left in the match. The crowds definitely feeling it a bit more now as a JBA has a near-fall on Martin from a sunset flip. There's another double-underhook suplex by the JBA kicked out of (Gorilla: that must have taken the wind right out of her!....nope!"), tags are still fairly easily and frequently made as a JBA is slingshotted by Kai out of a bodyscissors hold into her corner and in comes Velvet who hits an elbow off the ropes but is selling the back at the same time as the announcers.. oh no! Roll-up by Velvet for a 2. She wants to execute another roll-up from the shoulders of Kai now but she's bounced against the ropes and devastatingly slammed on her back and that's it.


Velvet McIntyre and her ace hair.. HAVE BEEN ELIMINATED! :(


So, straight 2-on-2 now, it's The Glamour Girls v The Jumping Bomb Angels, and all 4 are in the ring. If you hate abbreviations, skip to the last paragraph now. The GGs are whipped into each other by the JBAs and a double bodyslam from the JBAs. One JBA slingshots(!) a GG on top of the other GG as one GG and one JBA make their way out of the ring. The JBAs have the momentum but a GG nails the in-ring JBA with a knee to the back from the apron. Bodyslam on the JBA, and I can stop abbreviating momentarily because Kai is climbing to the top rope but takes too much time and misses a splash as the JBA tags in the other JBA who hits a top rope crossbody and


Leilaini Kai (or Audrey)... HAS BEEN ELIMINATED!


Judy Martin's not going out without a fight though as she takes control, strange counter from the JBA though as she slams Martin right on the seat of her arse. Not sure what you'd even call that, but the other JBA is in now and they're double-teaming now with a knee off the top rope, Jimmy Hart is up on the apron now and a JBA nails him with a dropkick which the crowd love. Top rope clothesline from a JBA now and that's it!

Your remaining survivors... THE JUMPING BOMB ANGELS!..who I believe went through the whole match without being identified individually, so don't blame me for that.


The JBAs bow to the crowd as Jimmy Hart staggers out with Martin and it's back to the blokes.

Overall, it's largely a bit of an exhibition in terms of storytelling and crowd heat especially when you compare to what else you got on this show, there's some good workers and some shite ones and some sloppy looking moves but that could describe a lot of the men's matches too. In terms of excitement and general fan investment, I wouldn't put it above the work of Alundra Blayze several years later. You could kind of tell this style of women's presentation was on its way out, but I'll be a gigantic women's apologist and say I enjoyed the match. Actually pretty smartly booked, though the apparently easiness of making a tag irked me a little but that's hard to avoid in these matches anyway, plenty of enjoyable work in amongst the earlier sloppiness and yeah, I really like Velvet McIntyre, the Bomb Angels of course shone even if I couldn't name them for shit within the match and Leilani Kai seemed like a really good worker too.

Survivor Series 1988


Contributor: tiger_rick


Match: Randy Savage, Hulk Hogan, Hercules, Koko B. Ware & Hillbilly Jim vs. Big Boss Man, Akeem, Ted Dibiase, Haku & Red Rooster.



I was lucky enough to get Survivor Series 1988. I love the show. The opener is a showcase for the Ultimate Warrior, the 10-tag team sequel is next and then it’s Jake and Andre’s teams head to head. I love the ring apron too. The blocky old SS logo in silver on material red. I’m reviewing the main event though. You have to on this show, don’t you?

I saw recently someone said the teams don’t make sense because why would these jobbers be in there with the big guns. I think it’s obviously like school football. The captains of the six teams line everyone up and take turns picking. Jim Brunzell was last picked, no doubt about it. 

Prior to the match the heels cut a promo on a terribly naff green screen which makes them look like they were cut out by the TNA graphics “department” while the director uses 1000x zoom to show us what’s up Dibiase’s nose.

The heels are out first to Jive Soul Bro and then it’s Savage wearing a fantastic red Mega Powers cape. I’ve always thought they could have got another year out of this. A run with the tag titles against the Twin Towers, Demolition and Powers of Pain would have done decent business. The angle itself was perfect as it was but I wonder what their business looks like if Savage vs. Hogan headlines WM6 and Warrior takes the belt at WM7. We’ll never know.

I always saw these shows on tape without any idea of the context when I was a kid. The commentators always did a brilliant job of establishing everyone’s character and the feud they’re in within 30 seconds. It was never confusing. Poor old Ted Dibiase is feuding with Hercules here in some sort of master/slave angle. It’s a huge drop down the card for Dibiase who’d been Hogan’s opponent the previous summer and lost to Savage in the WM4 main.

Hogan rakes Haku's eyes with his boot for no reason. Jesse calls it. Hogan’s the heel, as always. Gorilla points out that Hogan started Hillbilly Jim off in the WWF. Jesse retorts "unfortunately for all of us". It’s a good opening with lots of quick tags. The Rooster tries to ram Koko into the turnbuckle but these black folks have hard heads – Wrestling 101, Terry. That’s the beginning of the end for the Rooster as Hogan slams him and Savage drops the elbow for the pin. The faves then run off the heels as crowd go wild.

Haku hits a sweet drop kick on Hogan then absorbs Herc's prototype people's elbow and drops him with a beautiful side-suplex. There follows two minutes of Hillbilly and Akeem brawling that nobody needed to see before Akeem hits the big splash for the merciful pin. Next elimination follows shortly. Koko tries to splash Akeem in the corner (the fucking moron) but hits the turnbuckle throat first (sold beautifully in fairness) and Boss Man tags in for the first time to splat him with a side slam. 

Hogan come sin in to face off with the Boss as the crowd wet themselves. I prefer fat Boss Man. Hogan bites him in a corner. What a babyface. Dibiase’s in. Hogan hits an atomic drop on him. His second of the match. Monsoon says Dibiase has excellence of execution. The tart - caught here flashing his knickers at Dibiase before pulling Bret. 

Herc misses a knee lift on Dibiase by a mile and then runs into him while trying to clothesline him. Quality work, jerk. Virgil trips Herc and Dibiase thankfully sends him packing. Herc attacks Virgil on the outside, distracting Ted, and Savage rolls him up for the immediate elimination. Dibiase's arse is censored on the Network version.

They cool the crowd with Haku getting Hogan in a nerve hold. Then they build again as Boss man misses a splash on Hogan, which looks terrible but the crowd come alive anyway and it leads to the hot tag to Savage. He’s a ball of fire but it’s not long before he’s is in trouble. Slick stalks Liz which distracts Hogan who attacks Slick before Boss Man handcuffs him to the ropes. Bubba gets counted out but continues to smash fuck out of Hulk on the outside anyway. He then gets back in the ring to attack Savage while Akeem pushes the ref away and gets DQ'd. A nice cheap way to eliminate your top heels without them jobbing. 

Hogan sells like he’s nearly dead on the outside while Slick taunts him with the key to the handcuff. In the ring, it’s Savage and Haku one on one. It was always a shame Haku was so colourless because his work was fantastically crisp. He hits sweet crescent kicks and side-suplexes.

Eventually Haku decks Slick by mistake. Slick is at ringside for no real reason other than this spot although Jesse tries to cover by explaining that the ref is insisting Slick stays out there because he’s got the key. Liz pickpockets the fallen Slickster and Hogan is freed. He jumps back on the apron as Haku hits Savage with a beautiful splash that’s caught perfectly by the director. Savage kicks out. 

Hogan tags himself in, hulks up and gets the win. He poses to his music while Savage struggles to get to his feet in the corner. The absolute piece of shit. Hulk then hugs and spins Liz while Savage looks on unsure. It's perfect in the narrative of the story they would eventually tell at WM5 once our hero Randy finally snapped and attacked that hideous twat Lust Hogan. Sadly, a heel would walk out of WM with the WWF Title for the first time on that show.

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Survivor Series 1989


Contributor: HarmonicGenerator


Match: N/A



This review breaks the rules. I have chosen not to review a match. This is because, instead, I will be reviewing a segment, 3 minutes and 45 seconds in length, which is an emblem of the golden era of the WWF, a tribute to one of the greatest rosters in history, and a reason why we all love this ridiculous wrestling thing so damn much. It's the best thing on the show, and that's why, instead of a match, I will be reviewing the intro to Survivor Series 1989.


This segment gives us, in tiny snippets, a perfect insight into most of the top guys in the WWF at the time. You could know nothing about any of these people before watching this segment and you'd come out of it with your favourites, the ones you'd boo the shit out of, and the ones you wouldn't dare approach for fear of having your head clean ripped off. It's such a great summary of the time, and it's probably one of the greatest introductions to a show WWE's ever done. Could you imagine them doing it today?


As the crowd cheers, we fade in on Hulk Hogan. He's wearing the WWF Championship and precious little else. But for his 'Hulkamania' bandana and crucifix around his neck, he could be starkers under that title belt. This would go some way to explaining the glint in his eye and the smirk on his face, like he can smell a multimillion dollar settlement three decades away."Yo, Hulkamaniacs!" he begins, as his left pec begins to wobble rhythmically along with his flailing pythons. "It's Thanksgiving night, and this is the happiest time of year for all the Maniacs, brother. You know, all my little Hulksters, we got a lot of things to be thankful for. Number one, we're thankful for being happy and very healthy. We're thankful for having time to share with our loved ones. We're also thankful" as his arms start drawing letters in the air like the Magic Pencil, "that Hulkamania is still the strongest force in the universe."


According to Google, when asked what the strongest force in the universe is,


There are four fundamental interactions that we know of. These four interactions account for all observed forces. These interactions are: Strong Nuclear, Electromagnetic, Weak Nuclear and Gravitational. The strongest of these four is the Strong Nuclear.




Sorry, science. In a traditional Survivor Series match, Strong Nuclear, Electromagnetic, Weak Nuclear and Gravitational are definitely coming up short against these guys.




Anyway, Hulk continues, his eyes betraying a moment of not knowing where the fuck he's going with this, "after the turkey's done, after the blessings are all done, I can tell ya what the Hulkster's mostly happy about. IT'S SURVIVOR SERIES TIME, AND I'M THANKFUL FOR MY TEAM OF HULKAMANIACS". Yes, Hulkster, YES. I was never a big Hulkamaniac beyond owning his Hasbro, victim as he was to eternal 50-50 booking against Warrior and the Bushwhackers, they being the only other three I had. But you watch this little 35-second promo and you can see exactly why he was the top guy. He just radiates stardom. The absolute right person to kick this thing off.




Ted DiBiase! Million Dollar Belt slung over his right shoulder, dollar signs on the collar of his swanky jacket, a fistful of dollars and a stoic black man in a shiny red bow tie behind him. He says, simply, "I'm thankful because I'm rich, and you're not", throws the money in the air, and LAUGHS HIS FACE OFF.


This lasts five seconds. Five seconds, and Ted DiBiase is able to completely convey what makes the Million Dollar Man so great. That laugh! It's just superb. It's infectious as well, because it made me laugh too.




Jake 'the Snake' Roberts, clearly rushed out from the toilet cubicle where he was 85% of the way through a sweaty and frantic wank in order to cut his promo, beads of sweat running from the front of his receding mullet and down the sides of his face, before pooling under the edges of his moustache like he's a boxer dog who's been out for a particularly energetic walk and hasn't realised he needs to shake off the slobber yet. "I'm thankful for having Damien," he says calmly, raising one eyebrow as if inviting us into a secret, the key to wrestling success, for the cheap cheap price of however much he charged JRPO of this parish for the privilege, "and the DDT". Five seconds, gimmick summarised, back to the cubicle to wipe himself off. Thanks Jake.




Demolition. No idea. One of them shouts some stuff while the other one gapes his mouth open and sticks his tongue out.




"OOOOOH YEAAAAYYA!" It's the Macho King! Wearing an ensemble that only he could get away with - sceptre in his left hand, your nan's orange bath curtain with white tassely bits she's refused to throw out because it's only wearing away a tadge at the bottom, honestly, it'll do until Christmas, snazzy sunglasses, and the Eye of Agamotto from Doctor Strange set into a crown.




This seems the time to make a probably redundant point, but one of the many beauties of this segment is showcasing just how different every member of the roster is from each other. You couldn't mistake any one of the people for anyone else. Every act is so distinct, so colourful, so striking and above all, so memorable. It's fantastic.


Macho has Queen Sherri with him. Silver tiara perched on her mad head, she's started drawing something on the side of her face but appears to have got bored partway through because it's not quite finished. She's waving her hands about like she's casting a spell. If anyone in the WWF could ever have secretly been a sorceress, it was Sherri.


"I am thankful," begins Savage in that wonderful, wonderful voice "that I am the only man," as Sherri grins at him like a loon, "who is worthy of being the Macho king", Sherri's got glitter on her boobs, and they both give us an "ooooh yeah". What a duo.




Hacksaw Jim Duggan, who looks to have had his annual bath just before taping this. Honestly, I've never seen him look so tidy. "I'm thankful for the privilege of living right here," ah no, hang on, it's starting to unravel, his eye's sneaking round the back and his hair's coming apart, "in the good old US of A, tough guy!" He gives himself a big thumbs up for managing to get out a word as long as "privileged".




Dino Bravo and Earthquake, hopping up and down as if standing on a really cold floor. "I'm thankful", ooh ahh, "I've got the big Earthquake," ooh ahh, "on my side! Ha ha ha ha!" Earthquake does nothing but stand there and look mean. Dino's bloody thrilled to have this beast as backup, and it's the most entertaining he's ever been because he's only on screen for five seconds.




The Dream! It's Dusty Rhodes. "What I'm thankful for for Thanksgiving", he cries, rubbing his hands together as a momentary pang crosses his face when he remembers he used to be the NWA Champion, and he pauses for just a second in anticipation.

"FOR MY POLKA DOTS!" YES, DUSTY! Making the best of it! He looks jazzed! How can you not love him!




2017 Royal Rumble winner the Big Boss Man's here now, dressed in full uniform but, like Jake before him, clearly rushed out before he was ready because he hasn't done the top five buttons up on his shirt. He's holding a massive ball and chain. No nightstick?

"I'm thankful for the justice…"


THERE IT IS! In a masterful reveal, the nightstick flips into view in his right hand! It was there the whole time! Between that, the ball and chain and the handcuffs hanging out of his pocket, Boss Man is ready for anything here.


"…I serve!"


I'll mention that at this point, we are 1 minute and 18 seconds into the show and we've already seen EIGHT Hall of Famers. EIGHT. And only half of them are dead!




Brutus Beefcake, scissors snipping away at thin air. He's thankful for wrestling, cutting and strutting. He doesn't get quotation marks because his attempt at a strut was not the best, and his bowtie doesn't look as good as Virgil's.



The Model! "I'm thankful for my good looks". That's the gimmick. He's got the shades, he's got the towel tied around his neck, he's got the cheesiest smile on the planet. What a smarmy bastard. Beautiful.




Rick Rude, who, fuck me, just made me think of Negan from the Walking Dead. The way he said "I'm thankful" didn't half sound similar as well. Jeffrey Dean Morgan, I've just found your inspiration for the character.




Lose the stubble, and tell me there's not something of the Ravishing One in there.


Anyway, he's thankful "for having the most ravishing body in the WWF", he blows a kiss, and dammit, I can't look at him without thinking of bloody Negan now.




Roddy Piper, having the absolute time of his life, flounces round in a circle and tells us "I'm thankful because I ain't Ricky Rude". And he blows a kiss too! Piper possibly gets less screen time than anyone so far, but it's used so masterfully and he gets so much over in such a short space of time, you barely notice he's barely there. The attitude, the character, the antagonism, it's all there within a couple of seconds. It's so good!




The Genius. He's thankful for being the world's smartest man, but doesn't get enough time to do a rhyme

(Like I just did there, did you notice? Did you?)

so we'll move straight on and




Mr. Perfect! My god there were some proper wrestlers around in these days, weren't there? "I'm thankful for being absolutely perfect". Yes you are, Mr. Perfect, yes you are.




The Bushwhackers! Not a FUCKING clue what they're on about, they're absolute mental cases, the pair of them, but dammit, I love them for it! Absolutely batshit. Hilarious. What the fuck they're doing clinging onto each other making faces, I have no idea. I would dearly hope they're both like that the whole time and they were kept around so long for the entertainment value backstage.




Bobby Heenan. The complete contrast. Suave, dapper, reserved, restrained. He lays it out simply. "I'm thankful for spending Thanksgiving with all the members of the Heenan Family." That weasel!




NOW we're talking. We keep the big new star of the moment for last as ULTIMATE WARRIOR turns up looking like the greatest action figure in the world come to life. I have no clue what he said other than "Survivor Series" and "It's going to be a WAAAAAAAAAR" but damned if I don't want to cheer myself hoarse for him. He looks MEGA. Muscles bulging out of muscles bulging out of muscles bulging out of muscles. Intercontinental Championship around his wait. Green symbol painted on the chest, green and pink and black on the face. He's something you just can't imagine existing in real life. He should be a comic book, he should be a toy, he shouldn't be real, but dammit he's there, an actual living ULTIMATE WARRIOR yelling incoherently and looking like he's about to explode at any point and it's incredible and BRING IT ON, WARRIORS!




Three quarters of my Hasbro collection in that image!


So, we've met the stars of the night, and now it gets really good, because we get Vince McMahon running through the card. The Survivor Series logo zooms towards us in a very nice bit of graphics work they'd do well to replicate today, that lovely bit of saxophone and synth kicks in, and Vince begins his rundown at fever pitch. You wouldn't think he'd be able to keep up this level of shouty excitement throughout the whole thing, but he not only manages, he somehow manages to sound EVEN MORE EXCITED THE LONGER HE GOES.




The music builds, and Vince even sounds excited about the Red Rooster. His voice cracks a bit as he starts on Hogan's match, but he recovers for



All building to the line we've been waiting for...



The show's got a great card, and the matches were pretty decent, but nothing, nothing is going to beat that introduction.

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Survivor Series 1991


Contributor: AdamTH17


Match: Hulk Hogan vs The Undertaker w/Paul Bearer – WWF Championship






Here we go then. 1991 Survivor Series. An event noted for many differentiating reasons. The debut of Flair, a man considered by many to be the greatest wrestler of all time, first and foremost. His move over from rival company WCW caused quite the stir within the wrestling world, not least over the status of the WCW Championship he held in possession. The events that transpired in the days leading up to his departure with the company have been well documented, as well as heavily criticised, and rightfully so. Ric Flair in 1991 was the guy. Not only was he still a wrestler very much in his prime, he was very much still a certified draw. He would debut tonight, leading a team including himself, Mountie, Warlord and Million Dollar Man, wearing the belt that he claimed gave him the status of the "Real World Champion". In addition, we also get more build towards the rapidly impending split between the Rockers, as well as a main event pitting The Legion of Doom and Big Boss Man against The Natural Disasters, and IRS. This event also marked the first Survivor Series which took place on Thanksgivings Eve, rather than Thanksgivings itself.


I'm sure there'll be a number of people whom make the choice to review the traditional, Survivor Series style of match, so I'm going to steer away from that. Instead, I'll be choosing a match which is indeed history making. Ever since the inception of Survivor Series, every single match prior had been contested within the traditional, elimination confines. From 1987, to 1990, every match occurring at the show would happen in that classical format. After all, that was the niche with the entire show. The whole draw of the PPV was the opportunity to see this rare match type be showcased, up until this point.




Hulk Hogan vs The Undertaker marked the first match under the Survivor Series label to not take place in an elimination match. Rather, the two men would simply meet in a one on one bout to determine which of them would hold the WWF Championship. I wasn't even alive when this match was contested, so I'm not an expert in terms of how this match was built toward. All I'll let you know is that Undertaker hasn't been pinned yet in his WWF career (which spans at roughly 2 years at this point), and has just attained the first of his 23 legendary Wrestlemania wins. Hulk Hogan is the reigning and defending WWF Champion, defeating Sgt Slaughter at Wrestlemania 7, and holding the belt ever since. Hogan, however, has been issued challenges by Ric Flair, whom confronted Hogan himself, allowing the Undertaker to beat down the champion, and rip off the necklace, ala Andre in the build for Wrestlemania 3. They've not particularly hidden the fact that Flair will be getting involved very well.


I think that more or less covers my vague knowledge on the build, so let's get into the match itself.


Undertaker comes out first, with his awesome theme and is accompanied by Paul Bearer. Already, a fantastic contrast within the entrances alone. Undertaker, stoic and dark, draining the room of life, whereas Hogan, vibrant and colourful, with bounds of energy and charisma. Heenan spends no time whatsoever planting the seeds for the Flair/Hogan showdown, nothing that Hogan indeed isn't the "real" world champion. If there's one thing Hulk does really well in the opening minutes, it's the fact he doesn't particularly want to fight with Undertaker. He's hesitant to engage, taking a long time to lock up and jostle with him, and even more so upon Undertaker shrugging off all of his initial offence. Hogan retreats to the outside, and no sooner after re-entering the ring, is being worked over by Taker.


Undertaker, whom lays in his offence by hissing chokes Hogan in the corner, and punches him around the ring, before reverting back to the usual choking spot.

Hogan actually begins to mount a comeback of sorts, a succession of clotheslines has Undertaker rocking, but he can't land the bodyslam. It's Hulk's turn now to walk Undertaker around the ring, eventually cleanly dumping him out of the ring. Hogan's advantage doesn't last long, Bearer works the heat by distracting the ref whilst Undertaker chokes Hogan with a wire. Shitty job from Hebner, who times himself all wrong, staring right at Undertaker cheating and doing nothing about it. Back in the ring, and there's no change. Lots more choking spots ensue, whilst a guy dressed as Hogan in the front-row attempts to pump up the crowd.


It's time for the finishing stretch. Undertaker holds in a claw hold for a painfully dull amount of time, and he actually cuts off Hogan's comeback with a flying clothesline that misses by a considerable distance. Hogan proceeds to COMPLETELY no-sell the Tombstone (which had been presented as a death-finisher prior to the match) and engages Hulk-Up mode, finally slamming the challenger. Here comes Flair however, and as Bearer blocks Hulk from hitting the legdrop, Flair slides in a chair for Undertaker to nail a second Tombstone.


The Undertaker w/ Paul Bearer def Hulk Hogan in 12:45 to become the new WWF Champion.


This match, quite simply, wasn't very good. It wasn't bad, don't get me wrong, but it was dreadfully dull and dragging, especially throughout the segments where Undertaker was in control (meaning the majority of the match). The whole match was worked with the same, plodding punch, kick, punch, kick style, with no change in pace or energy. Its fine to have the huge, powerful heel dominate, but at least make sure his offence has some sort of menace behind it. The choking, the punches, the heat segments were lacking from Undertaker, though he was trying his best not to hurt Hogan.


The crowd were into Hogan's comeback though, and the finish of the match gives us a clear direction going forward with the Hogan and Flair storyline.

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Survivor Series 1992


Contributor: Otto Dem Wanz


Match: Kamala vs The Undertaker – Casket Match



I'd never watched Survivor Series 92 before, nor have I seen much of this time period at all having been born in early 92 myself. So while I’ve always loved The Undertaker, I’m finally seeing him in something pre-1996 that isn’t his debut, a title match against Hulk Hogan or him ascending to the heavens at a Royal Rumble.


The 92 Survivors came from the Richfield Coliseum, a boss little arena that stood adjacent to several farms in the Ohio countryside. It's sadly no longer there as it is now a meadow. Yeah.


The card seems pretty average except a star studded tag match and a bout between two titleholders in the main event, but I’m going to write about the additional “treat” of the first ever casket (although announced as ‘coffin’ by Howard Finkel) match with two of the most athletic big men of all time. Well one of them anyway. 


Some fat lad in the audience has dressed up in a suit and white face paint to resemble Paul Bearer, he's stroking a homemade urn which makes Vince McMahon on commentary chuckle, but made me feel uncomfortable even though he’s presumably gone the same way as Eric Kulas. Kamala also looks pungent, making his way to the ring in a giant African mask that covers his entire face and upper torso. He’s accompanied by Kim Chee and I must admit I do like his music (boom boom, boom, boom, lulululululululu aaaaah aaaaaaah AA AH!), he's announced by Harvey Wippleman who is one of two of Kamala’s managers (can you imagine someone having two male managers today?).


Here comes Undi and the crowd go bonkers, the high pitched tone to the pop implies a lot of kids in attendance. The real Paul Bearer (who we know sadly did succumb to an Eric Kulas-like fate) is wheeling down the coffin on a support structure. Vince McMahon and Bobby Heenan are on commentary, Undertaker feels no pain according to Heenan. The whole presentation is extremely cartoony.


Having seen the coffin and the Deadman, Kamala is very worried and is trying to escape the ring, Kim Chee calms him down but horror is being shown through his protruding eyes - creepy as fuck when combined with his monochromatic makeup and loincloth. 


The bell sounds and Kamala bails, only to eventually ushered back into the ring by his handlers after a good minute and a half of stalling. The two begin to trade offense for a bit and its immediately clear that Kamala is just horrible; he can only muster some slow chops, misplaced head-butts and a clothesline so poor it wouldn't put a dent in a cream cake. Undertaker isn’t much better here to be honest, he’s about 15 years away from being the BEST PURE STRIKER IN THE WWE but he at least performs a lovely Old School (which obviously isn’t called Old School yet, I don’t think it even had a name at this point) on Mala in what is by far the most agile move of the entire match.


Momentum switches as the managers get involved, and after the action spills outside there’s a chair shot from Mala which the camera angle makes it seem as if it’s aimed towards Undi’s head, but less threateningly lands across Undi's back. In some ways its remarkable how Undi has had such a long career and is relatively so healthy compared to other wrestlers he faced, although you then remember he absorbed about 5 moves in total between 1990 and 1997 and it’s slightly less surprising.


Anyway, Kamala has Undi grounded back inside the ring and hits two splashes that look more painful for Kamala's knees than Undertaker's torso. Bearer then climbs up to the ring apron to create a distraction but is tripped up by Kim Chee in a hilarious move that sends him falling flat on his fookin arse. The urn falls out of his hands and noisily hits the ring. Mala kicks the urn towards Kim Chee who sends it straight back to him, they’re both scared to hold it for some reason - meanwhile Undi sits up and twats him, seemingly knocking Kamala out.


One tombstone later and the bell rings. The timekeeper seems to have forgotten the match isn’t over yet, although it soon will be as Undi then rolls Mala's carcass into the open coffin (he fills the bugger up comfortably) before hammering some dench nails into it, and the first ever casket match is over after 380 seconds.


Heenan wonders if it’s possible to breathe in there, McMahon then stupidly asks him to go and ask Kamala. Erm, he's out cold and locked in a casket fighting for his life Vinman. As someone who has claustrophobia this whole thing must’ve been fucking terrifying for poor old Jim Harris, although if they were to try this again in 2016 he'd have plenty more space to move around in (sorry).


This was a nothing match, despite the interference it wasn’t very exciting and it seemed to go on for far longer than the 5:30 minutes it supposedly did. This at least marked the beginning of a gimmick match that has seen some of the best and most entertai… hang on, there’s been like one good casket match and even that had a fuck finish and deprived us 4 years of Shawn Michaels. So yeah, fuck this match, fuck caskets and show me the humanised Undertaker who was involved in Hell in a Cells, family feuds with dark secrets and Wrestlemania classics. 


As someone coming to this retrospectively and who wanted to avoid doing the oft-talked about matches, I now wish I’d have had a go at the main event or the tag match. I apologise if this review sounds negative and doesn’t make for fun reading, but I will finish on a positive note:


None of the matches at this Survivor Series (including the title match) would have introduced me to one of the great wrestling themes of our time; aaaaaah aaaaaaah AA AH, aaaaah aaaaaaah AA AH!!


Thank you and goodnight from the Ohio barn. 

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Survivor Series 1993


Contributor: WWFChilli


Match: Four Doinks Vs Bam Bam Bigelow, Bastion Booger & Headshrinkers



What! The fuck is this?

Quick reminder of why the hell this is happening. Bigelow (a guy so good, he’s good enough to have people always saying he deserves better) and his old girl Luna, had a run in with Doink the Clown. Who promised, because he’s turning face and will soon be irrelevant, that he and a team of Doinks will beat Bigelow’s team at Survivor Series.

BACKSTAGE: Bigelow’s team get interviewed, and I’m sorry, but this is fucking disgusting. Bigelow states he has the greatest team ever put together in the WWF, yeah Biggs, you keep saying that pal. All the while the Shrinkers, Afa and the absolute mess that is Bastion Booger eat and rip apart a turkey carcass because it’s 1993 and we’re entering those wilderness years where if Vince didn’t have his people around him in the drop a bollock years, he’d be long dead now after a mad last hurrah when WCW got too much.

Bigelow’s team enter. Quote Vince ‘A lot of people in the Boston Garden don’t know what to make of Bam Bam’s team’. They think they’re shit Vince mate. Absolutely shit. BUT THEN WE GET THE DOINKS. Oh it’s the Bushwhackers. Who actually get quite a pop, and prove to me by getting a pop in 1993 that kids never gave a fuck for work rate did they. Men on a Mission follow and I genuinely don’t know if that’s worse. The match hasn’t started and the whole thing already feels moribund. I say ‘MATCH’, this bout is more like watching a really fucking awful comedy troupe. Everything, and I do mean absolutely everything in the match is complete bollocks. 

From the comedy, right down to the moves. Everything is god awful. Bastion Booger (and while we’re at it, what the fucking hell is he?) does a leg drop and splash as if he is an actual wrestling figure. Vince spends lots of the match talking in that weird ‘I’m talking about a main event but every word has a gap and I labour every word’ voice… FOR THIS MATCH. When I say nothing really happens, no moves of note occur. Samu, is eliminated when he bites a water balloon and is eliminated. It happened. Poor Fatu, the poor fuck, he is dealt an even worse hand. He literally slips on a banana peel. Not just that, but he’s so worried about looking the prick, he clearly positions the peel to slip on it. Poor fucker. Mo rides around the ring on a scooter at one point, and somehow manages to blow that spot. Booger gets eliminated by essentially hurting his bottom before Mabel sits on his face. Bigelow watches all of this, selling ‘ah fuck’.

Bigelow eventually gets pinned by all four Doinks. Errr, ref mate, ding ding ding, DQ’s all round you shifty shit. Nah, instead it’s over and the Four Doinks survive. McMahon’s last line as the pin goes down, ‘This is a cartoon’. That it is Vince. That it is. Fuck this show.

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Survivor Series 1995


Contributor: jazzygeofferz


Match: The Dark Sides Vs The Royals



Commentary is delivered by the ubiquitous Vince McMahon, The late Mr Perfect, and the ever-punctual Good Ol’ JR from beneath his Resistol hat. The recap explains how we’ve ended up with this veritable clash of the titans. Mabel had overcome The Undertaker on his way to completing his mission and becoming King Of The Ring, thanks in part to interference from The Supreme Fighting Machine Kama Mustafa, and since had achieved such heights as giving hernias to those poor buggers that carried him to the ring for his match against Diesel at Summerslam, and that Godawful match at Summerslam. Anyway, a month ago King Mabel had dropped a couple of legs across ‘Taker’s face on Raw “Crushing his face”.


Jerry Lawler is already in the ring with Doctor Isaac Yankem DDS & Hunter Hearst Helmsley out, introducing King Mabel, once again on his dais and accompanied by Sir Mo last. JR Tells us the future World’s Biggest Love Machine weighed in at “568lbs before breakfast”. Savio Vega’s music plays and he leads two of the other Dark Sides out, or at least 2 of them. Fatu has left the Headshrinkers and is currently saddled with the positive role model gimmick where he was trying to be all make a change and looks like 1995 has thrown up all over his jacket and hat. Henry Godwinn completes the trio and has his slop bucket. All three of them are wearing Undertaker t-shirts, no doubt all available from the concession stand or some dial-up version of WWEshop.com. Taker comes out last, and to his own music.


This is the first time he’s been seen since he was injured last month and he’s wearing a protective mask, but not yet the one that glows under the UV lighting in the arena. Suddenly I’m reminded of the steel protective mask Scott Steiner wore in WCW when he broke his orbital bone, and how many headbutts he used to dole out while wearing it, but I digress.


Taker does the full entrance, stairs, lights, pops, everything as King Mabel looks on with what JR reliably informs us is a look for fear, whereas he just looks confused if you ask anybody else. The more mobile Royals clear the ring and Mabel just moves to what is actually the opposing team’s corner and holds his crown up in the air to a smattering of boos.


Vince desperately tries to get Mabel over as the team captain, but it’s abundantly clear he’s the 4th most charismatic guy on the team, and possibly 6th or 7th most charismatic in the match depending on whether you include the ref, bearer and arguably Mo, Fatu starts against Hunter Hearst Helmsley, who Perfect has already started dubbing “Triple H”.


A typical running the ropes hot start from Fatu, Helmsley struggles to get back into the match, then goes for a pedigree when Fatu telegraphs a backdrop. As Hunter applies the hold he catches sight of ‘Taker’s masked face and recoils in horror before giving the future Sultan a kick to the stomach and making the cardinal mistake of thinking he can injure a Samoan’s head. As a friend once reliably informed me, the Anoa’i family motto translates as “never strike a Samoan in the head”. Fatu snaps straight back up from the turnbuckle and starts laying Hunter out with punches and headbutts of his own before tagging in the big hog farmer from Arkansas, who send Hunter scampering to the corner and tagging in Jerry “The King” Lawler.


Lawler takes one look at Godwinn and decides he’s going to let Yankem get his hands dirty instead, tagging in his ever faithful dentist. Helmsley distracts Godwinn with some trashtalking, allowing Yankem to get the upper hand with a clothesline and some stomps. Godwinn reverses a whip and takes the former Unabomb over with a beautiful hiptoss. Lots of elevation on that, followed by a big scoop slam. And a running elbow drop. Watching Glen Jacobs selling like this is a million miles away from his early matches as Kane, and even a far cry from his sojourn as Diesel’s replacement. Isaac takes control with a belly back suplex and tags in Hunter, the classic heel schtick of taking over on the weakened opponent. The Connecticut Blueblood’s offence is anything but refined as he chokes Godwinn on the ropes, distracting the ref for Sit Mo to try and get a few licks of his own in from outside.


There’s a second referee involved here to try and keep the managers from getting involved. Jesse Ventura would be pleased. Godwinn gets Helmsley up from a military press and teases throwing him to the outside before the ref convinces him to drop Helmsley into the ring. Vince & JR postulate on whether Bill Clinton is watching, suggesting that the Godwinns are his favourite wrestlers, Arkansas boys having to stick together and all. I would assume Phineus is watching this alongside the Samoan Gangsta Party. Vince also wonders whether Godwinn bought any real estate from the president. Jerry and Savio get tagged in now, and Jerry starts flipping and flying for Savio, who even finds time to showboat with a little dancing. Lawler hits and dropkick and mocks the Dark Side team with his own dance before Savio attacks from behind and sends Jerry into the corner to receive a few shots from Fatu who then gets tagged in and starts putting some offence to Lawler, punches, headbutts, corner stuff. Jerry sells it in his inimitable style. If anybody on the heel team is going to make this watchable, it’s Jerry. Lawler reverses a whip to the corner and I think Isaac misses his cue to hit Vega from behind. He starts softening up Fatu then tags in big Mabel who levels Savio and the Puerto Rican settles in to take some babyface beatings.


The Royals are really in control now, and in no rush to eliminate Savio as they take turns pummeling him in the corner, including some double and triple teams. Yankem hits a fabulous dropkick on Vega then tags in Helmsley for some more ref distracting heel teaming. Savio shows resilience in the face of this adversity as Lawler is tagged in to chants of “Burger King” from the crowd. Lawler hits the piledriver then showboats before pinning avio for a 2 count. Hunter tags back in, but Vega keeps showing that fire and battling back from the corner. Helmsley finds himself on the receiving end of a hold he’ll find himself taking a lot in five years time as Vega pulls a modified uranage suplex out of nowhere. Mabel is pacing the apron trying to silence the fans who chant for Vega to make a hot tag and let the Undertaker into the match as Helmsley tries to crawl back to his corner and tags in Lawler who cuts Vega off and delivers another piledriver.


Vega doesn’t sell this one and saunters into the corner, tagging ‘Taker as he arrives. Jerry shits and brick and heads into his corner as all the Royals drop off the apron and leave him to his fate. All except King Mabel who moves and tries to hide behind the ringpost in an attempt to distance himself from Lawler. A weak link is beginning to appear in the match, and unfortunately I have a nagging feeling it’s the one they’re desperately trying to get over. Lawler turns round into a lift up two handed choke bomb from ‘Taker. Jerry goes back for another tag and once again Hunter & Yankem jump off the apron while Mabel simply turns his back. If this had happened in WWE today Lawler would have slapped him on the back and rendered him the legal man. How times have changed. Lawler turns round and is scooped up by Taker, ready to take him for a ride to one of Gorilla Monsoon’s favourite destinations: Tombstone City. “The Tombstone is coming” Vince squeals as Taker puts the Dark Sides at a 4-3 advantage.


Yankem comes in to try and avenge his favourite patient and soon ends up on the receiving end of a tombstone for his trouble. Yankem is then eliminated in surprisingly short order, but then I guess that wasn’t really the gimmick they were going for yet. Helmsley tries to attack the Deadman from behind but ‘Taker realises and confronts him, sending Hunter to the floor. He tries to leave up the aisle but Henry is waiting from him with the slop.

Helmsley gets up on the apron to escape and finds himself goozled by Undertaker, who chokeslams Helmsley and eliminates him as well. As this happens Mabel strikes, dishing out a huge sidewalk slam as ‘Taker goes into that dead sell mode, the crowd is now just waiting for the moment he sits up. Mabel drags him into the centre of the ring and starts with the leg drops again. He delivers one and starts doing a celebratory dance to heat the crowd who are all just cheering for ‘Taker. As Mabel turns round, ‘Taker sits up, stopping the King of the Ring in his tracks and sending him backpedalling to the ropes. Taker rises to his feet, a looks of displeasure on his face. Mabel tries to gracefully fall out of the ring between the bottom two ropes and fails miserably, bouncing off them and landing flat on his arse in the ring. In terms of not making it through the space you’re aiming for it has to be second to the Shockmaster’s entrance, and Uncle Fred had an entirely valid reason for his tumble.


Sir Mo attacks ‘Taker from behind as Mabel tries to bail out and finds himself surrounded by all four members of the Dark Sides. Mabel sprints up the aisle as the ref counts him out and ‘Taker goozles Sir Mo before dishing out a hell of a chokeslam and sending him also scampering from the ring. He doesn’t sell it, just slides out of the ring and runs up the entryway, but it doesn’t matter. The Dark Sides win in a shutout. The commentators put over Taker’s mask as genuinely terrifying while the other team members attempt to celebrate as if their doing anything but tagging ‘Taker in really contributed to the victory, but the real story is how nothing the match was.


I was expecting hilariously awful, and was disappointed to find that it was a sterling effort by most of the heels to try and get ‘Taker over as the monster he was, and the other faces were just present to make people want ‘Taker in the match. Why it couldn’t have gone to 4 on 2 or even Taker having to come in as a last man I don’t know. Give him some odds to overcome so it feels like much more of an achievement when he wins. It did what it needed to, though. Taker was back and Mabel was scared to face him 1 one 1.


It certainly made people anticipate the showdown when it finally occurred at In Your House the following month.

Survivor Series 1996


Contributor: WeeAl


Match: British Bulldog, Owen Hart & The New Rockers vs The Godwinns, Doug Furnas and Philip LaFon



We're LIVE in New York City from Madison Square Garden! There was a Hall of Fame banquet the night before where the likes of Pat Patterson, Lou Albano, Vincent J. McMahon, Killer Kowalski and Superfly Jimmy Snuka were inducted. Tonight Bret Hart returns to battle Stone Cold Steve Austin, Psycho Sid wants to dethrone Shawn Michaels and The Undertaker wants to make Mankind and Paul Bearer Rest in Peace, and who will survive the gruelling elimination matches tonight? Karate Fighters and the World Wrestling Federation (the worldwide leader in sports entertainment, lest we forget) present the 1996 SURRVIVVVVVORR SERIES!

Vince, JR and The King Jerry Lawler welcome us to the show and we kick off right away with the British Bulldog's music. He enters via the sliding doors of the NYC skyline, from the old MSG entranceway. I miss that entrance, and I miss WWE shows from MSG. Bulldog looks the business. He's flanked by Clarence Mason, who was as pointless as can be, a Slammy laden Owen Hart, and The team of The New Rockers. Leif Cassidy. What a bastard of a name he got given. Marty Jannetty is here and he looks smacked out of his tree.

Doug Furnas and Phil LaFon make their entrance. We find out Furnas is from Oklahoma and LaFon is French Canadian. JR hasn't mentioned yet that Furnas was one of the strongest fuckers in the world at that point, instead he's jabbering on about it being the home of Mickey Mantle or something. The pair of them were All Asian Tag Champs in Japan and this is their debut in the WWF.

Henry O. Godwinn and Phineas I. Godwinn are led to the ring by Hillbilly Jim. There's a shot of the Karate Fighters blimp. It stirs nostalgic feelings now, but I'm amazed nobody stabbed it with a knife at the time. The ref needs to confiscate it as a foreign object.

The heels are arguing with the crowd. I believe the Bulldog can be heard asking three pissed up fellas in the second row where the fook his title shot is. Marty kicks it off with LaFon. Now we hear about Furnas' powerlifting background. Furnas had a Powerlifting total of 1090KG (2403 lbs) combining his Squat, Bench and Deadlift. Jannety is playing around and taunting Lafon and gets taken to town for it. Jannety uses the ropes to reverse the wrist lock and monkey flips laFon, but laFon lands on his feet. Marty looks pleased with himself as he hasn't realised this yet, until he is turned inside out with a big left armed lariat.

In comes Cassidy. He's the angry child to Marty's class clown. A wrestling battle ensues with plenty of reversals that ends in a knee bar by LaFon, followed by some kicks, before Cassidy leg drags LaFon who makes the tag to big Phineas. He washes his hair with his spit. Disgusting says the King. I concur. Leif scoop slams the smelly looking bastard and looks disgusted at having to interact with him at all so he spits in his face. This doesn't go down well. Cassidy tries the slam again which doesn't work and he eats one of his own, as well as a hip toss and a big right hand before interference from Marty brings the tag from Owen and he puts the boots to this Ham n' egger.

Owen is in a foul mood because Bret is back to upstage him in MSG again. A good course of action would be for him to kick his leg out of his leg a second time.

Lots of teamwork on Phineas in the heels corner. He gets the stink kicked right out of him. He somehow manages to make the tag to big Henry, who we learn is the Brain to Phineas' Pinky. Taking over the World of Wrestling this pair ain't. Marty gets slop dropped and sent to the back. According to legend, Marty may or may not have been heading backstage for a bag full of coke before sharing a spit roast of Sunny with Shawn Michaels. Chris Candido was said to have been usher at the door should any of the rest of the locker room not know how to find the pre match warm up area. Who knows?

Big Henry is all set before going on a tear before Owen gives him a spinning heel kick and pins him. Phineas comes in and cleans house before Bulldog slings him over his shoulder like the useless tub of lard that he is and drops him with the Running Powerslam for the three. Furnas and Bulldog square off and Davey Boy gets his cardio in by hitting the ropes back and forth at a furious pace. Furnas goes for something, I haven't a clue what, but he fucks it up, eats canvas and Davey Boy dances on him. Leif Cassidy joins in the fun before eating a spinebuster for his troubles. Bulldog runs the ropes again as a distraction for a beautiful top rope drop kick from Owen. A gorgeous perfect plex gets 2. 

The Bulldog is back in and he delivers a delayed vertical suplex, then does a bit of gymnastics and a wee jig for LaFon. Furnas is getting the piss beat out of him by all the heels before making the tag to LaFon. A reverse suplex from the second rope kills the future Al Snow. 

Bulldog and LaFon exchange holds before LaFon gets the better of things with a spinning kick and a high knee for the count of two. Bulldog flung LaFon up in the air and he comes down on his front. Owen comes in with a Belly to Belly suplex, a neckbreaker and an elbow drop from the second rope for a count of two. Enziguri for 2. LaFon is fighting hard. He's double clotheslined by the tag champs, then Davey boy kicks him in the bollocks in front of the ref, but no DQ. It'll Harden him says Davey.

LaFon gets double teamed by Owen and Davey but manages to get Furnas to drag Owen out of the ring and he manages to pull off a crucifix/sunset flip pinning combination for the three count on the Bulldog. Travesty. But the big man gets the last laugh with a chop block. Just what LaFon deserved according to Lawler.

Owen wraps the leg around the ring post and goes to work. Owen beats the shit out of LaFon's leg and puts him in the sharpshooter, but Furnas turns cheating cunt and gets in the ring without being tagged. LaFon finally gets out of jail with a reverse enziguri to Owen. Owen is looking for Davey Boy but he's gone. I know Owen I miss the beautiful big bastard too. In comes Furnas with a tackle and a lovely drop kick for a 2 count. A big Belly to belly suplex gets 2 when Owen puts his foot on the rope. Clarence Mason is still being useless on the outside. 

Furnas whips Owen into the corner, who takes it to the Sternum. Furnas follows in with an almighty looking German Suplex that lands Owen on his belly, barely avoiding landing him on his head. This gets the three count, the win, and a decent pop for the debuting Furnas and LaFon. This is as good as it would get for them in the Fed. The match was Ok for an opener, with the right result. Nothing special. Furnas looked good, Davey Boy and Owen looked great. LaFon seemed really slow. Was he pretty beaten down by this point? The less said about The Godwinns the better. Marty and Cassidy could do their bit in the ring when the notion took them. This was probably the 4th or 5th best match on the show though, with the two main events, Rocky Maivia's debut elimination match and possibly Taker v Mankind in front of them.

What became of them all?

Doug Furnas: Upon retiring, Furnas and his wife ran a group home in San Diego for abused boys. He would also raise bucking stock rodeo bulls in his family's farm. He passed away in 2012 from heart disease at 52 years old but had also been suffering from Parkinsons.

Phil LaFon: Along with Furnas they tried and failed to win the WWF tag team titles, but won the ECW tag team titles in their run there. He is now involved as the head trainer in Monster Pro Wrestling in Edmonton.

Phineas: Following his retirement from wrestling in 2006, much too late some would say, he worked as a chef in Clearwater Florida.

Henry: Currently involved in the head trauma lawsuit against the WWE. Unlikely to be seen again. Some say he will have a horse’s head delivered to his bedroom sometime within the next week.

Marty Jannetty: Had some involvement with Chikara not so long ago, and before that had a brief return to the WWE during the feud between Shawn Michaels and Kurt Angle and would make other appearances up until 2009. Currently involved in the same lawsuit as Henry.

Leif Cassidy: Became Al Snow. Liked to give everybody Head. Went to ECW and TNA and runs his own wrestling school, based in the UK, and is the "Global Development League" for TNA wrestling or some nonsense like that. Alright Al, if you like.

The British Bulldog: Member of The Hart Foundation in 1997, bought himself out of his contract to join WCW after Montreal. Came back and was never the same again. He was a purle, jeans and boots wearing shadow of his former self after a back injury suffered in WCW. He very sadly passed away in May 2002 from a heart attack at the age of 39.

Owen Hart: Stayed on in the WWF after the Montreal Incident and had a decent midcard run with HHH over the European title in 1998, after a great 1997 with involvement with The Hart Foundation and IC and Tag Title runs. In May 1999 after reprising his Blue Blazer gimmick, Hart tragically fell to his death at the age of 34 during a stunt gone wrong and has been sadly missed by his family and the wrestling world ever since.

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Survivor Series 1997


Contributor: Mr.E


Match: Stone Cold Steve Austin vs Owen Hart - Intercontinental Championship






I got Survivor Series 1997, which is widely remembered for one thing, the infamous SCREWJOB.


However, we've all heard/seen/absorbed information via some other sense, [i dunno....tasted?], about something to do with the Screwjob itself. With that in mind, I've gone for Stone Cold Steve Austin vs Owen Hart, for the Intercontinental Championship. This was one I wasn't familiar with, nor was I watching WWE around this time, so apologies if anything I've picked up about the backstory to this, being factually incorrect. (I mean, that part with the Cylon homeworld space invasion still happened right?).


From what I understand, Steve Austin got his neck broken, (thanks to a botched piledriver, at the hands of Owen Hart, back at Summerslam), and this is his first proper match back. To be totally honest it very much shows, as the match itself is very brief, and Austin looks to be in bad shape. Although in all fairness, he's wresting some 3 months after breaking his neck, so god knows how that's even possible.


Austin turns up with a kick ass, physical full pane of glass shattering on his entrance...although it only half breaks and he shoulder barges the rest for good measure. Austin also bumps into the ref, so looks to be not having any of the anti-American atmosphere from the Canadian crowd. Owen waltzes in with Jim Neidhart, a Slammy carrying Bulldog and Doug Furnas & Phil Lafon....for reasons unknown to me to be totally honest. Owens entrance video is a solid loop of him breaking Austin neck, along with a T-shirt showing: Owen 3:16 on the front, and "I just broke your neck" on the back. Neidhart rushes the ring, and eat a Stunner. The rest of them get ejected and it gets going.


From here on out, it's fairly straight forward. Owen teases the piledriver a bunch of times, and Austin looks totally fecked whilst he hobbles about trying to fight Owen. Again, fair play to him for even being able to stand, but he probably should have taken some time off. Anyway, it goes back and forth for about 3-4 minutes......then Austin blasts Owen with a stunner seemingly out of nowhere to re-claim the Intercontinental championship. Furnas and Lafon come out, both eating stunners to give the crowd something to smile about, probably due to the impending doom that Bret was facing in the finale.


All in all, a decent little match, if not covering up the fact Austin is unable to do a lot of his normal stuff.....but he did his thing and won, so again all props to him for even being up on his feet, let alone wrestling. I doubt that'd happen in this era, but fair enough. I’ve not seen any WWE from around this time, so may go back and watch the whole initial Attitude era, as this really has peaked my interest.


Survivor Series 1998


Contributor: WyattSheepMask


Match: X-Pac vs William 'The Real Man’s Man' Regal – First round tournament match



Ah, Survivor Series 1998. The Deadly Game Tournament, named as such because...I'm not sure why to be honest. It's not different from any other tournament which JR kindly cleared up early by telling us that "only winners advance".


So, it's time to look at....holy fuck, there's 14 matches on this thing! And none of them are Survivor Series Elimination matches! I thought I'd put Wrestlemania IV on by mistake, but no, 14 of the fuckers! And most of them are fucking shit ranging from 4 seconds to the longest match being only 17 minutes.


Rather than go for the longest match, I'm going to go with the match that is probably considered the 'least worst ‘of the night, which is saying something because there are fucking loads of appalling efforts on this show and one match where The Rock beats an already eliminated Big Bossman with a Small Package in just 4 seconds. Oh fuck, no! That wasn't my review, honestly!


X-Pac makes his way out with his epi-endusing entrance, as The Fink tells us the match has a 10 Minute time limit "with the winner meeting 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin in the quarter finals". Strange he mentions that as they usually don't, I wonder if that will be a plot point or not.


Regal is out next in hard hat and flannel shirt. Lawler sings along to Regal's theme as we see his trim doing manly things like, lifting a bag of sand.


The bell rings and Regal takes control with headlock and fists before XPac retaliated with a spinning kick and gets a nearfall from a back Suplex. 


JR isn't sure who he's watching-"XPac with a nearfall on Blackman. Blackman goes around 245lbs...", so nice to see that he's paying attention. Regal regains control with a European Uppercut before locking in a submission/restspot about 60 seconds in.


Crowd chant "Regal Sucks!" as he does his great 'press the muscle with his finger to make it look like its flexed' pose. Both guys working in fast forward to get their stuff in, as they only have a maximum 10 minutes, Regal counters a sunsetflip style pin into a caterpult across the ring as XPac face plants before getting to the corner on the far side.


Lawler correctly pronounces XPac, none of that "X Poc" bollocks from The King. Regal again with a stretch submission, as XPac tries to fight out before just boots him in the breadbasket. We see Vince watching on as Regal hits a lovely Gut-Wrench Suplex for a nearfall followed by a head-scissors. 


Sloppy counter from XPac as both men regain their feet and XPac fires away with fists, fires Regal into the corner but misses with a modified Bronco Buster and lands awkward on his neck/shoulder.


Regal crotches XPac on the top good & proper, probably because he looks absolutely bollocksed already but that doesn't stop him from climbing to the top to hit a double under hook Suplex from the top, in which XPac immediately grabs his neck after. A pair of 2 counts before yet another submission hold from Regal, most likely to buy XPac some time.


XPac Irish whips Regal into the corner again but both men collide in a clumsy fashion as Tim White checks on XPac, and Regal hits another European Uppercut, which probably isn't a good idea to do on a guy with a dodgy neck. Another Spinning Heal Kick from XPac and Regal crawls to the corner, which allows XPac to hit the Bronco Buster properly this time. Following a Suplex, XPac heads to the top but Regal bumps the ropes, sending XPac to the outside after being crouched on the top rope.


XPac blocks another Double Underhook Suplex and hits a Suplex of his own as Tim White counts to ten at lightning fucking speed for the double count out at 8:10. JR once again reminds us that only winners advance and that both men are out of the tournament as The Fink confirms it over the PA.


Vince in a rush sends Commissioner Slaughter to the ring to start a period of Overtime. Slaughter does on those runs where you don't actually move any quicker to ringside and informs The Fink we're going to have a 'five minute sudden death overtime' period as XPac lays in a crumpled heap in the aisle-way.


The bell rings and XPac just fucks off to the back and the bell rings again and this match is done. Both men are out as Vince screams "AUSTIN GETS A BYE?!" we then cut to the tourny brackets signalling the strangest upcoming match possible




The Attitude Era at its absolute top barmy form, this was actually the longest match of the first round. Both men worked as much they could into the strictly limited time that they had, and you have to feel that they could have had a good five minute spree of near-falls assuming XPac hadn't buffered his neck up.

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Survivor Series 1999


Contributor: kickin it wit the kliq


Match: The Godfather, D'Lo Brown, Mosh and Thrasher vs Bradshaw, Faarooq, D'Von Dudley and Bubba Ray Dudley.



It was really tough for me to pick a match from this show because, well truth be told, this is probably the worst show from one of the worst years in company history. I had contemplated taking the easy way out and review The Big Show vs Boss Man, Albert, Viscera and Mideon, but that wouldn't be much of a write up, so I have opted for the opening match.


The show opens with a very well put together video package highlighting everything that has happened in the lead up to tonight's main event of Triple H defending his WWF championship against The Rock and Steve Austin, with Vince McMahon as the special guest referee, (It'll be interesting to see how that one pans out). Anyhoo, The Pyro goes off and JR welcomes us to a sold out Joe Louis arena in Detroit, there are thousands of signs in the crowd, I'd forgotten how many signs there used to be in the attitude era.


The first participant's music hits:




Out comes the Godfather to a pop that most of today’s babyface main eventers would be jealous of, he is accompanied by some of Detroit's finest "restaurant quality ho's" whatever that means.


Godfather does his catchphrases in the ring to a massive pop again and his music starts playing again, he looks surprised, out comes Pimp D'Lo. This was the beginning of the end for D'Lo, after the Droz incident, the push stopped, and he was opening match fodder from here on.


Godfather embraces D'Lo as they wait for the Headbangers to join them, but there’s a twist; The Headbangers also come out as Pimps to probably the biggest pop the Headbangers have ever came out to, I actually did get a bit of a kick out of this.


Team 1 is complete and the music hits and out come The Dudley Boyz, I honestly can’t remember them wearing the Tye Dye in the WWF, but then again I've not watched back any of 1999 since it happened.


Bubba has the mic, he wants to know if the Godfather is going to offer them any of his "h.h.h.h.h.hho's" ah the stutter gimmick, I'd forgotten about that as well. Godfather politely tells him "N.n.n.n.n.n.n.NO" to a huge pop, god damn The Godfather is over here.


Strange Music that I've never heard before plays, out come Faarooq and Bradshaw, they’re not The Ministry Acolytes and they’re not quite the APA yet either, they still have their chests painted, which looks stupid, but they still look like two of the hardest mother fuckers on the planet, so who am I to tell them they look stupid.


Slight dissension is teased between The Dudleys and The Acolytes as the bell rings.


Bubba and Mosh start us off, Mosh is quickly de-wigged and backed up into the corner, we're two minutes in and already JR and the King are talking about the main event.  D'Von and Thrasher are now tagged in, the action, surprisingly, does not improve, It's still as boring as sin and JR and the King are now talking about what Thrasher may have hidden in his wig. Bradshaw, who has clearly had enough of this shite tags in and mullers Thrasher with a Clothesline from Hell for the 1,2,3.


Thrasher is Eliminated by pinfall.


Faarooq is in with Mosh now, nothing happens and D'von tags in, JR and King are now talking about Ho's and Christmas, blind tag from Bubba who sneaks in and the Dudleys hit the 3D for the pin.


Mosh eliminated by pinfall.


Following this an EC DUB chant starts, it dies after a few seconds, there are some slight boos and a mild boring chant. This apparently pisses off Bradshaw who by now has really had enough of this shite, he enters the ring with a chair, lays out D'lo for the DQ and then absolutely murders Bubba with a sick chairshot to the head, thank fuck they've gone the way of the Dodo, no need for that at all, especially in a throwaway opener.


Bradshaw eliminated by DQ


Faarooq and D'von argue over who gets the pin on D'lo, D'Von goes for the cover but it's broken up by a leg dropfrom his own partner Faarooq, well in theory that was the plan Faarooq missed his legdrop by about a foot, it’s beginning to fall apart now, D'von throws Faarooq to the outside and the two start brawling in the aisle, I can see where this is heading, both men brawl to the back and are both counted out for a traditional Survivor Series cheap elimination.


D'Von and Faarooq eliminated by count out.


Back to the "action" in the ring now, Bubba has somehow regained consciousness and gets a two count on D'Lo, he whips D'lo to the ropes, but its reversed, D'lo hits Bubba with the Sky High for a really close 2 count, the sky high is a move that really needs to make a comeback, Reigns would look awesome drilling people with it.


D'lo is in control now, he has Bubba in the corner and has him set up for a top rope frankensteiner, but wait... Bubba Ray puts the brakes on and plants D'lo with a Bubba Bomb from the middle rope for another really close near fall. D'lo Reaches over to the corner to tag in the Godfather, who has done, nothing all night, Bubba also reaches his corner for a tag but he’s all alone.


The Godfather is in for the hot tag, he hits a clothesline and bodyslam and then his mad run around in a circle legdrop, Bubba is up and staggers over to the corner, but the Godfather sees him he starts warming up the engines, he hits the Ho-Train in the corner to another big pop, he tags in D'Lo who goes up top, and hits the Low Down for the 1,2,3 and the win.


Your winners are The Godfather and D'lo Brown.


From the second D'von and Faarooq are eliminated, I actually quite enjoyed it, the crowd finally buying into the near falls helped, but the previous 12 minutes wasn’t great, but that’s the case with lower card 1999, good characters, great crowd interaction, particularly from the Godfather, who was over like rover. Watching this back I can’t help but feel sorry for D'lo as he was the one bright spark in the mid card in late 99, and had he stayed in the IC title picture, he would have had some blinders in 2000 with Angle, Jericho, Benoit and Guerrero.


All in all though it was a decent opener, but when you look at the rest of the card and how they killed the crowd with the Austin hit and run angle, it probably is the best match on a very, very poor show.

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Survivor Series 2000


Contributor: Otto Dem Wanz


Match: Stone Cold Steve Austin vs Triple H - No Disqualification



Coming to you from the Ice Palace in Florida on November 19th 2000, we have the Survivor Series from the peak year of the WWF's business.


To add a bit of personal context here, this was one of the first big events I remember watching on Sky Sports as a wide-eyed 8 year old. I love everything about WWF 2000, even the bad stuff due to nostalgia softening my view of certain angles and characters so if there are any against the grain thoughts you'll no doubt see them reflected here. I say this because I'm going to review a match that wasn’t well received at the time and has an ending which is seen as a massive blot of the WWF's almost impeccable 2000 copybook. Let’s see if I can stick up for it.


After seeing an average undercard including Rikishi lose to Da Rock and Kurt Angle pulling an ingenious swerve to defeat the Snakeskin trousered Badarse, Jeff Hardy pins the Godfather to win a Survivor Series elimination contest and we're all set for our main event.


We see some backstage camera footage showing Austin walking towards the curtain, meanwhile Triple H is telling those darstadly Radicalz to "do it". What "it" means is unclear just yet. Why did they spell their name with a 'z' by the way? I suppose it was 2000:




After we get the 'dun dun dun dun' sound treatment (which means it’s a bloody important match), a video package explaining the year-long story behind this match is shown. Austin was run over at last year’s Survivor Series and was subsequently out for nearly 12 months, the mastermind behind the operation was HHH whose motivation was removing Austin as the biggest obstacle preventing him from being at the top of the Federation. While Austin was gone H held the WWF title longer than anyone else and married the bosses’ daughter, so mission accomplished really. Austin is rather keen on revenge.


Entrances now, both men coming out through a gorgeous set that has a radar scanner as the centrepiece and lots of camouflage draped over several video screens, H has his rejigged My Time music - he looks magnificent. Austin comes out to his Disturbed Yuh Muh Nah theme, raises two middle fingers to HHH and proceeds to tear into him right away, the bell sounds and we're underway - grudge match!


It's all Austin for the first couple of minutes with nary a wrestling move in sight, the action spills outside very early and when the two are brawling in the aisle we get a sighting of Faith No More fan! It's one of the latest events I remember seeing him at.


H takes the ascendency by blocking Austin's attempt to throw a steel beam at him, then they end up through a black curtain (above which hangs a Union Jack, someone from these shores went over it seems – dopper?) to the backstage area. Oh wait, they're immediately back in the arena, you teases.


Austin has control again as they brawl to the announcers desk and proceeds to twat H over the head with a monitor and his beer cooler. H bleeds, Austin is wanting a pint and downs some Steveweiser. They keep on brawling (can you tell it’s the Attitude era?) until big spot time - H goes for a Pedigree onto steps but instead gets backdropped through the English announce table, nothing we haven’t seen before really. They're back in the ring now and H is doing a lovely cowardly plea for Austin to leave him alone whilst he retreats towards the corner. Austin closes in on him and stomps a mudhole, then hitting a Stunner but refusing to cover H, employing the familiar wrestling trope of going for more punishment instead of gaining a win.


Austin wraps a chair around H's neck while he's lying prone on the floor then ascends to the middle turnbuckle, this is going to look sick (and will decapitate Hunter) if it comes off and the crowd are shitting themselves with anticipation… no :( H unwraps said chair from his neck and rolls out of the ring before Austin can jump, and the two finally head backstage proper, Austin leathering H with fists and kicks all the way up the ramp. Backstage H is thrown with force into a vending machine, but here come the previously foreshadowed Radicalz who swarm around Austin and start beating fuck out of him whilst HHH retreats.


Loads of refs show up to try and separate them and H moves outside the arena to a waiting automobile. The car is mic'd up so we can hear H's heavy breathing and panting. Benoit really lays in his fists on Austin and then scampers outside the building too, Austin rather stupidly follows him. The camera goes back on H in the car, who then coughs loudly and appears to be holding Steph's jam rag (or his own, bloody towel). Benoit is seen sprinting away, which is no mean feat as he looks like he's wearing dress shoes and it’s a rainy night in Tampa, we then hear H again who seems confused as to Austin's whereabouts. He's nowhere to be seen and Benoit is nonplussed too.


Suddenly a red forklift clamps H's car in between its claws (?) with H still inside it, and we see Austin behind the wheel of the machinery. H is trapped inside the car and keeps saying "son of a bitch", "Jesus" and "don't do it Austin" in rapid succession before a final "doley [sic] shit!!!" as the forklift drops the car upside down 15 feet to the ground below. The match ends in a no contest and we fade to black. That was absurd.


This was basically an Attitude era main event brawl with a very weird ending. Not a great match and one that never really excited me until they got backstage and it began to feel slightly more dangerous and edgy due to the setting and the Radicalz. I suppose there's a shred of continuity in that Austin loved appropriating vehicles to wreak havoc, and he obviously wanted to end H in a storyline sense but to murder him via forklift? We're supposed to suspend our disbelief with this stuff and Austin is someone you can do that with more than most, but it just wasn't possible here as it was so farfetched.


So a hugely disappointing end to an event that was symptomatic of the somewhat ordinary WWF PPV’s post-Summerslam. Worse still, a baffling finish to a match that should be remembered as the culmination of a scorching hot angle that was built up with two massive stars over a year-long period. H was on Raw 13 days later with hardly a scratch on him which further compounded this rubbish.


Austin was yet to find his groove post-injuries and it showed here, he was rusty and still attempting to find his place in a company that had maintained its massive popularity despite his absence. I feel like he only really got his mojo back around Rumble time, leading to 3 scorchers in a row on PPV through to 'Mania 17, so if you want a belter Austin vs HHH match then watch No Way Out instead of this.


Despite my earlier statement and fondness for the time period, I have no against the grain thoughts on this match or the ending. I’m going to have to confess to going along with the general consensus that it was completely, utterly, doley shit.

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Survivor Series 2001


Contributor: Undefeated Steak


Match: Hardyz vs Dudleyz – Steel Cage Match to unify WWF and WCW tag team titles




2001’s Survivor Series was pretty much the closing chapter for the WWF vs Alliance invasion angle. It’s a great show from top to bottom, main evented by the famous 10-man Survivor Series match between WWF’s Rock, Big Show, Jericho, Kane and Undertaker against WCW and ECW’s Stone Cold, Booker T, RVD, Kurt Angle and Shane O’Mac. Kurt turned against Austin at the end of the match, saving WWF and signalling the end of ECW and WCW. This was a Vince McMahon show, no doubt about it.


It took place in the Greensboro Coliseum, in front of just over 10,000 fans. The show did 450,000 PPV buys. It’s crazy to imagine in this day and age that almost half a million PPV buys could be seen as a disappointment, even for a non-Wrestlemania show, but Invasion that year had a staggering 775,000 PPV buys. Wrestling was still red hot in 2001.


I’m glad I’ve been given an excuse to revisit 2001’s Survivor Series. It’s an event I have fond memories of, and it took place 15 years ago tomorrow (18th November - I’m writing this 17th). The show’s poster features Lita and Torrie Wilson, both in their prime, and the subjects of millions of teenage fantasies. The tagline for the show was “Winner takes all”, and the official soundtrack was “Control” by Puddle of Mudd (remember them?). Perhaps they should’ve used Abba.


For this review, I won’t be choosing the main event as I’m sure it’s a match we’re all familiar with. On the undercard, I remember the cage match between the Dudleyz and Hardyz been enjoyable, and of course there was the smoking hot Stacy Keibler at ringside. Test won an immunity battle royale; Regal beat Tajiri; Edge beat Test; Christian defeated Al Snow; and Lance Storm, Justin Credible, and Raven beat Albert, Scotty 2 Hotty and Spike Dudley.


I would’ve chosen the Tajiri vs Regal match but it only weighed in at around 4 minutes. I’ve opted for the Hardyz vs Dudleyz match. It’s in a cage and it’s to unify the WWF and WCW tag belts.


The video starts with the camera looking at the cage. The arenas looked so much better back then, darker and gritter. The pyro starts and the Dudleyz’ brilliant music hits. Out come the brothers from Dudleyville, with Stacy Kieber. I won’t ramble on about Stacy but my gosh, would it make sense if I said she was almost too hot for wrestling?


The Fink’s obviously on ring announce duty. That voice takes you back to a better place immediately.


The crowd pops for the Hardys. They were over in 2001. We’ve got JR and Heyman on commentary, one of my favourite announce pairs. They worked brilliantly together. We’re told that the match can only be won by pinfall or both members of a team going over the top of the cage.


There’s WCW referee Nick Patrick outside the ring and we’ve got a WWF ref inside the cage. Heyman sells the match brilliantly at the start, naming some of the great WCW and WWF tag teams of the past, before proclaiming one tag team title will end tonight.


Bubba and Matt start this match. Strangely, Jeff and D-Von are in their respective corners; I thought this would’ve been a ‘tornado’ tag match. Pencil this in for the ‘things you forgot in wrestling’ thread.


Matt and Jeff get the early advantage, scoring a couple of fresh double team moves on Bubba. Bubba cuts Jeff out with a biiiig slam.


 D-Von’s in the ring now… Jeff hits a nice drop kick.


I also reviewed a tag match from Survivor Series 2013 which was similar to this in that the crowd was firmly behind the faces and there was legitimate heat for the heels. The crowd plays such a crucial role in how enjoyable a match is. It makes such a difference.


The Dudleyz and the Hardyz had great chemistry; their styles gelled well. Five minutes or so into the match and nothing of note has happened yet – it’s just been a standard back-and-forth opening. I’m starting to remember a bit more of the match and the finish, I won’t spoil it now for the sake of this review.


Jeff gets a great pop when he’s tagged in, he was clearly the more popular of the two brothers even then. Both teams have tried pin attempts already but it’s Matt and Jeff who are the first ones to attempt to climb the cage. Obviously it’s too early to finish the match at this stage; D-Von hits a sweet Russian leg sweep on Matt from the top rope, and on the opposite side of the ring, Bubba hits a big Bubba Bomb on Jeff from the top. These are the first big moves of the match, it’s turned up notch now. These are my favourites types of high spots/bumps. Big enough to get a great reaction and progress a story of a match without being reckless.


Matt tries to fight back into the match but the Dudleyz slam him face first into the cage. Heyman and JR are doing a good job calling the match without going OTT. Bubba tries slinging Jeff into the cage, but Jeff clings onto the steel and starts climbing up. Bubba catches Jeff on his shoulders, and BOOM, D-Von rocks him with a Doomsday Device.


You know, I appreciate and enjoy classic/epic matches as much as the next person, but this is pro wrestling. The Dudleyz are doing a great job at drawing heat, Matt and Jeff have the fans totally on their side, there’s something at stake in the match, and there’s some solid moves and spots to connect the dots. They’re all doing their bit, and the Hardyz’ selling is marvellous.


Bonus points for this match: I’ve just noticed there’s a chain locking the cage door. All cage doors should be locked this way. The rule of giving a victory to somebody who walks through the cage doors is one of the worst rules they have.


The Dudleyz are still taking it to the Hardyz, as Bubba squishes Matt against the cage.


The tables are starting to turn now as Bubba and D-Von each miss a splash from the top rope. Matt hits a double clothesline from the top and follows it up by hitting some more offense on the Dudleyz including a nice neckbreaker and a DDT. Matt and Jeff hit a double splash/leg drop from opposite turnbuckles.


The Hardyz try and scale the cage again and this appears to be the beginning of the final stretch of the match. They’ve built up to It really well so far. Matt gets his foot caught in the top of the cage and is hung precariously upside down. This opens up a window for the Dudleyz to hit a WASSSSSUP.


Bubba screams to Stacy, who’s still outside the ring, “Stacy – get the tables”.


Referee Nick Patrick tries to warn Stacy against getting a table, but Stacy lifts her skirt up to reveal her arse, kisses Mr Patrick and then steals the key to the lock from his back pocket. The WWF and WCW refs start arguing with each other which allows Stacy to open the cage door and slide the table into the ring.


The Dudleyz try a 3D on Jeff but Matt makes the save. All 4 men are on the floor. Only the ref and the table are left standing in the ring. Matt gets up and manages to climb up and over the cage to the floor outside. That’s half the team there, and the crowd pop for it, but that leaves poor Jeff all alone in the ring with Bubba and D-Von.


Jeff does have some fight left in him as he delivers some damage to D-Von. Jeff then climbs to the top of the cage. Meanwhile, D-Von groggily tries to get to his feet but ends up laying on the table.


Jeff’s at the top of the cage now – he’s almost there! But, wait – no! Jeff’s just seen D-Von laying there on the table. “JEFF HARDY CAN’T RESIST”, screams Heyman. The crowd are on their feet. Jeff does that hand thing he does. Oh my! Jeff swanton bombs from the top of the cage but D-Von evades. Jeff crashes through the table. What a beautiful spot.


Jeff’s laying the wreck of what’s left of the table and Matt can’t believe it. Bubba gets his arm over Jeff, who’s totally out. 1.2.3… Bubba and D-Von get the win and unify the two titles.


Overall: A really, really good match. Exactly what is needed to be. It flowed brilliantly. The start, middle and ending was well laid out and worked and the crowd were hot for it.  Including entrances, you’re looking at around 20 minutes. I totally recommend it if you need something random to watch.


Survivor Series 2002


Contributor: MungoChutney


Match: Brock Lesnar vs Big Show – WWE Championship



The more obvious choice for 2002 is probably the Elimination Chamber’s debut. However, I decided to go for something a bit more relatable to this year’s show and take a look at Brock Lesnar Vs Big Show for the WWE Title. Now, the general feelings on the forum about this match appear to range from negative to full on hostile. I’ve seen some people complain about various things including how Lesnar was booked, the length of the match and the fact it was Big Show taking the belt.

Personally I’m fine with the booking of the match in general and Lesnar in particular. It makes sense and has more impact if he drops the belt and regains it at ‘ Mania in a few months’ time, especially with the addition of a Royal Rumble victory. The same goes for the length of the match, no problems with that either. If you’re going to beat him then do it in a match where the odds are against him and do it without drawing it out. The smoke and mirrors of the injured ribs and the Heyman betrayal are perfectly acceptable ways of protecting him.

Now the problem, and, as I already noted, it’s one that a few people have with how this went down. Namely, the Big Show. He’s at his blubbery fattest here and is wrestling in jeans. He looks shambolic and nothing like a champion or a guy who can beat Lesnar. Given that he’d been jobbed out tons by this point in his career it’s even hard to believe he can win with the addition of Heyman and Brock’s injured ribs. Kurt Angle would have been better choice or even his tag partner at the time, Chris Benoit, would have been more suited to this particular rub. WWE have been guilty of this ‘he’s big therefore people will always buy into him’ booking with Big Show on so many occasions that it’d be impossible to count.

The match itself isn’t that bad as it goes. 

They start off getting the vulnerability of the rubs over right away with some brawling on the outside. That sees Big Show bash Brock into the post, rather stiffly actually. Lesnar mounts a comeback almost right away with a couple of suplexes of the back and German variety respectively. (Side note: expect to see a lot more of these this weekend than we saw in 2002). The ref bumps off of a Lesnar bodyblock after Big Show avoids the F5. Brock then nails an impressive looking overhead belly to belly suplex. Credit to Big Show where it’s due, he’s got his working boots on here and is bumping and trying his best to make Brock look superhuman.

Heyman gets a chair in and it ‘accidentally’ lands closer to Show although Brock is still able to get it first. They struggle and Big Show punches a dent in the chair as Lesnar swings it, which is a good visual before Brock cracks it over his opponent’s giant forehead. Lesnar lands a brilliant F5 and the crowd are going crazy, they’re totally in to the match. 

Things get screwy as we get a new ref and Heyman pulls him out and decks him on the 2 count. Heyman does his great expression of fear as Lesnar cottons on to what’s happened and chases him around the ring, only to get inside and walk into a chair to the ribs and back. Chokeslam on the chair as ref #1 recovers to count the 3 and we have a new champion. Heyman accentuates his awesomeness by jumping in to Big Shows arms like a long lost lover, which also kind of looks like Vincent Benedict leaping in to the arms of Julius in Twins.

So, yeah. The match is alright, the story is reasonably sensible and Big Show tries to elevate Brock a little more. It almost works too but then you remember it’s Big Show and he was doing an impersonator gimmick and losing to everyone not so long ago. And he’s fat and wearing jeans too.

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Survivor Series 2003


Contributor: Dr Reefer


Match: Vince McMahon vs The Undertaker - Buried Alive Match



Not 30 seconds in and 58 year old Vince is pissing blood. Lots of punches and corner stomping. Fuck me Vince is bleeding like Mass Transit. Yay... More punches. Bollocks in to the ring post for McMahon. Who the fuck is the heel here?

More punches on the outside as Tazz tries to avoid having Vince ruin his suit. Is *anyone* going to do a wrestling move here?

Punches... Oh so many punches. Jesus wept this is shit. 

Undertaker heads up to the "gravesite" (To give you some idea how much of a classy concept this is.. http://prowrestling....ory:2003_deaths
) and comes all the way back to the ring with a shovel. BOOM! Gratuitous head shot to the already 3/4 dead Vince. 

Fireman's carry back to the grave site at the entrance way. Vince dumped like a sack of shit on the grave set and... Handful of sand to the face and a low blow from Vince and Undertaker is down... Fuck off. Oh fuck sake there's a fucking JCB AND THE JCB JUST EXPLODED... THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THIS HORSE SHIT? Kane appears and fucks up with some *really* bad punches.

The JCB tips some mud on 'Taker as Kane does a black power salute for reasons best known to himself.

The crowd are about to mutiny. Trips vs Goldberg next. I hope Hunter doesn't come out looking fat and pretending to be Ric Flair.

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Survivor Series 2004


Contributor: air_raid


Match: Randy Orton's Team (Randy Orton, Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho & Maven) vs Triple H's Team (Triple H, Batista, Edge & Snitsky)



OK, so I think I lucked out a litttle bit in getting 2004 because it's a show that a) I watched, b) I remember and c) I enjoyed at least one match from. The buildup video at the start of the PPV made a real good job of making me think Survivors was still a big deal, and then it launches into some nu-metal cut back from when they were still using that type of jazz every month, although it's a far cry from when I used to be able to tell you every track they used, from your Downfall (Trust Company) to your Adrenaline (Gavin Rossdale) and so on. It was getting a bit generic by this point.

Anyway, I'm still typing as Chimel mentions "Cruiserweight Championship of the World" which sounds shit and clunky if it's not coming out of Michael Buffer, and as much as I would love to say something about how crap Billy Kidman looked in that jacket which would look GLORIOUS on someone else, or how shit CAW the look on Spike Dudley is, but that's not why I'm here, so let's skip to.....

(No photos in case Butch reads it, and he doesn't like photos. I need to keep him onside...)

The buildup video is pretty cool, telling the story that developed on TV (conveniently in time for Survivors) that lead to the match, with the winning team each getting to run Raw for one week a piece in the weeks that will follow. It's kind of weird seeing Rhino standing there next to Benoit at points during the "revolt," they had been enemies for much of the previous year (pretty sure Rhino was one of Benoit's first opponents on Raw, now that I think about it).

Speaking of Benoit, he's the first out. Gets his usual "polite" reaction that he seemed to get everywhere apart from Canada. Announced as now residing in Atlanta, Georgia, which I hated. Y2J out next, announced as "born in Manhasset, New York" - problem with fucking Canada, WWE?? Just bizarre. Orton comes out third to a good reaction and I remember now that Maven was hurt backstage and so isn't going to turn up, allegedly. They plug New Year's Revolution and I will probably watch that Elimination Chamber at some point soon. I really thought Raw was the bollocks at the time. "Line In The Sand" brings out THE CHAMP and Big Dave, with Naitch in tow, in a show of unity. It actually pisses me off a little that Evolution didn't stay a four-piece enough to be a Survivors team unto themselves. That would have been fair to Flair. Terribly generic music brings out terribly generic Snitsky, and they remind us he twatted Maven backstage. Metalingus brings out Edge - has the Network retconned him to having that song already, I didn't think he had it until a little later? Whatever, Edge coming out last makes him look a star, and while some people will tell you it was either the aggression in his promos with Matt or his progam with Cena that made him look a big deal, I was starting to believe it here, and a little later on with his run with Shawn Michaels. Ah, HBK. He could make anyone a star.

Benoit and Edge start, do nothing interesting and tag in Orton and Snitsky. Orton brawls Snitsky down to the mat, which is impressive, and tags in Jericho, whose hair looks fucking dreadful here. He looks like a girl. Snitsky tags in Hunter and soon Randy is back in, punching but not quite with the venom you expect from their history. Big Dave is next in, powerslams Orton and tags out to Edge who then mocks Randy's pose. Getting into his groove already. Benoit is back in with some abuse for all three heels. He gives Dave a German with relative ease, gives Hunter three in succssion, then drops his Swan Dive headbutt om Trips and Edge simultaneously, before slapping Triple H in the Sharpshooter before Snitsky breaks it up. Edge tries to get involved and ends up in the Crippler Crossface until Dave breaks it up. Benoit getting all his shit in makes it obvious he will be first out and true enough. Tripper gives him a Pedigree behind the ref's back and Edge gets the pin.

Triple H and Snitsky get into a set-to over who made the tag, causing Batista to get in Snitsky's face, which the crowd seem to love. There should have been no doubt at this point he was on the cusp of being a big deal, by that reaction. The ref catches Flair tripping up Jericho as he attempts a Lionsault, and ejects him. THAT'S NOT FAIR TO FLAIR!!!! Reminder, at this point it's 2 on 4 with Maven absent. Batista lamps Jericho with a spinebuster but as he prepares to run in with a clothesline, Orton clocks him with the World title and Jericho follows with an enzuigeri which gets the pin. Wow, I hate that. The enzuigeri was far too crap to keep The Animal down, and Orton cheating like that wasn't very babyface of him. But then, Orton's babyface run was fucked from the start. When Evolution turned on him, they made him look stupid. When he spat in Hunter's face and ran off through the crowd, he looked a coward. When he lost the strap at Unforgiven, he looked a loser. So by this point he's a stupid, cowardly loser who cheats. Batista lamps Jericho with his big meat hook anyway before he leaves ringside. Triple H and Edge double team Orton outside the ring as Snitsky has control on the inside and I wonder how the babyfaces have any hope.... and HERE COMES MAVEN!!!! And the crowd goes mild.

Maven gets a few licks in, somehow Snitsky gets split open, then goes psychotic with a chair, getting disqualified. So.... Maven wasn't completely useless!! Except Triple H pins him immediately, so of course he's fucking useless. Orton and Jericho are dead men at this point. Edge and Triple H have taken virtually no punishment here so I'm getting a bit annoyed that I know they win. Jericho tries to take on both heels at once but an Edge spear puts an end to his night. Maybe it's my imagination but this seems awfully rushed at this point. Smattering of "RKO" chants, but the gravity of the situation is not exactly HBK against Team Bischoff the year before. Either that or Orton is not a likeable babyface. Edge shouts "What you gonna do Randy?" and I'd love to slap him. JR mumbles something about "diminishing returns" and it makes no sense.

Triple H gives Orton a DDT for a nearfall and tags Edge in. Orton gets a little respite off his powerslam. Edge nearly runs into HHH on the apron so Orton dropkicks him into him and grabs a schoolboy for two, but Hunter gets back in and gives him a spinebuster. Edge accidentally spears Hunter then turns around into an RKO for a three, which the fans pop big for. Louder RKO chants now. First RKO attempt on Hunter is foiled with a low blow, and The Game goes for the Pedigree. Orton reverses smooth as silk into an RKO (out of nowhere, according to JR) and gets the pin to a pretty decent pop. "That did not happen" says King, but he sounds like he can't be arsed. After the replays, Triple H is lying flat on his back outside the ring like he's dead as Randy celebrates, and all of a sudden it's goodnight from Cleveland.

You know, I remember it being better than that. Longer too, it just flashed by. The speed at which they went off air at the end sugests to me maybe they were short of time. Too much time dedicated to an interminable JBL title defence on the undercard no doubt. Or then again this was the show which had Undertaker vs Heidenreich on it which lasted about three weeks. I won't lie, match seemed very rushed, not much resonated. In particular Benoit was barely there, considering how he wasn't long removed from a World title reign. But they had a go at telling a story (even if Maven was far too pivotal a part of that story), there were stakes, the elevation of Edge and Batista seemed like it was going well, and the fans came alive for the finish, which also served its purpose - the advancement of Orton v Triple H, for which the ending was the right one. It was an enjoyable watch, just not quite as good as I remembered it being.


Oh, OK.... one photo. One won't hurt, right?



Survivor Series 2006


Contributor: Liam O’Rourke


Match: Team Cena (John Cena, Bobby Lashley, Kane, RVD & Sabu) Vs. Team Show (Big Show, Umaga, MVP, Finlay & Test)


I really felt like I drew the short straw by landing 2006 in this pool. There have been crummier years, certainly, but this was a year of flailing around in the dark, looking to the past, pulling the trigger too late on the future, and feeling uninspired as a result.


In an attempt to figure out what to watch, I cast my eyes over the opening video package. They talk about the history of the event, as this is actually the 20th instalment of the Thanksgiving Eve tradition. Don't be fooled, they didn't give a fuck about this event by this point. In fact, every match on this show was announced on WWE.Com within a seven day period. This was back when the website was busy incorrectly reporting the "death" of Corporal Kirschner (he was very much alive) and claiming The Rock was on the Raw Roster still.


But alas, I will fulfil my obligations, and of this plentiful bounty of mat action, a veritable spandex feast, I have selected the match for review.


It's Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler on commentary, as we kick off with MVP coming out of his inflatable tunnel. He seems uneasy, looking over his shoulder. We're told he's looking for Undertaker after having just played a role in the Taker/Kennedy First Blood match. Nobody cares about MVP at this point, and his arrival is greeted with silence. As an editorial note, I hated the MVP character - it would have been awesome with a different guy, but the fake swagger and lack of real charisma kills it. Just watching him walk around the ring bothers me.


Test comes out to his boring music. Jesus Fucking Christ he's enormous. My God. He has the Lex Luger 2000 and Davey Boy 1999 look of roids and pills, complete with protruding gut, puffed up face with horse teeth intact, and back acne that makes Jushin Liger's face look like Stacy Keibler's arse (a vast improvement, despite how it sounds). You hate to say it, but sometimes you see a guy looking like this and know he's not long for the world. It's the same feeling I had when, the Friday night Eddie Guerrero's final match aired, he walked to the ring and as he went past the camera, I said aloud, "Fuck me, look at the size of his back! There is no way that frame should be carrying that much muscle." Two days later he was gone.


On a lighter note, back in 2006 when I had trouble sleeping, I used to think about Test's music and I'd nod off in no time. Seems it has the same effect on this crowd too.


Umaga is out next, looking bad ass with Armando Alejandro Estrada in tow. Still no crowd reaction, it almost feels like this is a comedown match. Or maybe these heels just aren't over.


Finlay arrives, wooden stick in hand, but it is quickly confiscated by officials and taken to the back. Mickey Henson is our referee, wearing the ECW ref shirt that made him look like a bowler.


Big Show rounds out the team, with round being the key word. He really is a fat bastard here, and it's amazing how much better he looks now compared to ten years ago, both in body and face. Still waiting for our first noticeable crowd reaction. Jim Ross lauds Big Show as being an ECW, WCW and WWE World Champion. Wow, amazing how little that means here. JR also proclaims Survivor Series as "Big Show's event". I cast my mind back to try and figure out why...


1999 - Won a 4-on-1 handicap match, then won the WWF Title in the main event
2000 - Was in OVW because he was too fat.
2001 - Was the first man eliminated in the main event.
2002 - Was the first man to beat Brock Lesnar and won the WWE Title
2003 - Lost in the opener
2004 - Survived as part of Team Guerrero
2005 - Pinned by Rey Mysterio in the main event Survivors match.


So a real rollercoaster ride. Not sure if he is to Survivor Series what Taker is to Mania, I guess we'll find out together here.


RVD's music hits and the Philadelphia crowd wakes up. Van Dam saunters out, and quite honestly, looks like he couldn't give a fuck less about being here. Sabu is out next, wearing the job face. Good reactions, and there is still something very odd about Sabu being in the WWE.


Lashley enters the scene, as JR talks about how Our Bobby has been dominating ECW since his arrival 2 weeks ago. Wow, must be a stellar roster to achieve domination so quickly. Again, for the sake of research, let’s see what he's done:


In his first week, he beat Bob "His friends call him Sparky" Holly by DQ, and was booed when he opposed Rob Van Dam during an in-ring standoff. In his second week, he beat Matt Striker. Still, beats feuding with Tatanka in 2006, which was what MicKKKeal Hayes had lined up for him. Fans seem to like him.


Kane and Cena are last out for the team, with Cena waking up the fans a bit. Wow, he looks so young compared to now. I know it's a decade, but you can see the miles on Cena when you look at him here.


A sign in the crowd reads "RVD and Sabu are innocent", in reference to their arrest earlier in the year that cost RVD his push. Sadly, he most certainly was not. Anybody remember the police video that came out of that arrest? That was hilarious - Van Dam driving shirtless, the officer having no idea who they were saying "What's your name, boi?" to Sabu. Has to be knocking around somewhere.


Umaga is looking rabid pacing about on the floor, and we start with Cena and Umaga in the ring. They trade punches, with Umaga getting the early upper hand, and belting RVD and Sabu off the apron for good measure. Big Match John turns the tables and clotheslines Umaga over the top rope, much to the crowd's delight. Youmanga goes ballistic on the outside in response, throwing shit around and pulling a monitor from the commentary table. Bringing the monitor in the ring, Umaga lamps Cena and RVD with it immediately, giving us a callback to the gutless Zeus disqualification of 1989. Umaga was still in the build-up phase, hadn't been pinned yet, and was being primed for a series with Cena, so it makes sense. A big brawl flares up in the ring, as Umaga stands over Cena on the floor, JR giving us an amusing soundbite with, "Somebody get the SWAT team and arrest this crazy bastard!"


Umaga is eliminated by DQ


With RVD weakened, the heels work him over. Finlay gives him the flying ass to the dick, and an elbow drop that splits his lip. MVP is in, and RVD gives him a piss weak roll-up, followed by a spin kick that would generously be described as lazy. RVD is up, and rather than tag out, makes his own comeback. He tries the missed enziguri into back kick spot, but MVP isn't holding his foot right and it looks sloppy. Not a great showing from RVD, who I do enjoy. Test runs in, galloping towards Van Dam like Secretariat, misses a clothesline and gets a cresent kick. Finlay is in to kick RVD in the gut, but RVD catches it and hits his stepover heel kick, which thunders directly into Finlay's face and shocks the crowd into response. He fucking drilled him. Is it politicially incorrect to say he potatoed the Irishman? Is it even accurate to use the term "politically incorrect" anymore, given statements like that worked wonderfully in politics?


RVD keeps Big Show at bay before being pulled out the ring by Test. Test hoists RVD on his shoulder and tries to run him into the post, but because he's an idiot, it backfires, and he ends up running into the post himself. The ref is distracted by the commotion in and out of the ring, and in the chaos, Kane somehow manages to sneak in, the 7 foot Big Red Stealth Machine, and chokeslams MVP with the referee not seeing, hearing, or feeling a thing. RVD goes up top, hits the Five Star Frog Splash, and that's all she wrote for Montel.


MVP is eliminated by pinfall


It's 5 on 3, and you know this isn't going to last long. Sure enough, Test is at the post, jumping over the first fence, making a left at Village Corner, and hitting the Big Boot to RVD to pin him. The crowd is deflated.


RVD is eliminated by pinfall


Sabu runs in for a roll up, but Test kicks out. Test is quickly up, and throws Sabu out the ring near his own corner. Feels quite out of place, so I'm assuming he smelled Sabu's moustache. Test, because he's an idiot, follows him outside, where Lashley is waiting with a spear. Crowd digs it. Test is rolled back in, and Sabu hits a gorgeous slingshot legdrop to Test, following by an awesome springboard twisting Tornado DDT which gets the 3 count. Fucking hey. If Sabu always looked this good, he'd have been so much more valuable. But he didn't.


Test is eliminated by pinfall


Big Show is in to take on Sabu. The 'Bu goes for a springboard crossbody, but Big Show catches him. Show lifts him and gives him sort of a pseudo-chokeslam/bodyslam, that is apparently enough to finish him off.


Sabu is eliminated by pinfall


Kane is in next. Amazingly, the crowd pops as Kane and Big Show face-off. Not exactly Hogan and Warrior in the 1990 Royal Rumble, but enough to surprise me. Big Show immediately grabs Kane by the throat, as if for the chokeslam. In the spot we've seen a thousand times, Kane then rises and goozles Show in return. Always wondered if they were ever stupid enough to attempt the absurd conclusion to this spot - both men chokeslamming each other at the same time. Alas, we were denied that immortal moment here. In the ring runs Hornswoggle, who at this point is only going by the name "Little Bastard". He steps between Show and Kane, then runs back out the ring. The midget running around is apparently enough to distract this referee (you wouldn't see that in the UFC, after all), and Finlay runs in with a SECOND shillelagh, and uses it to club Kane. One chokeslam later, and Show gets the pin. As Gorilla Monsoon used to say, "turnabout is fair play". Hit the bricks Glen, you cheating bastard.


Kane is eliminated by pinfall


So we're down to Cena and Lashley Vs. Show and Finlay. Cena darts in and starts throwing punches at Big Show, getting booed in the process. He hits the ropes and gets a powerslam from Show, to a rousing set of cheers. Ahhh, back when this crowd conflict was organic. Finlay is back in, and delivers another flying ass to the dick. Finlay looks pretty damn good here, just being a vicious heel, clubbering with clotheslines and forearms, going after Lashley on the apron, etc.


Big Show tags in, delivers a headbutt and a chop, and has apparently run out of moves or breath, and tags back out. Finlay goes to the second rope with Cena lyng prone. He jumps onto the outstretched foot of JC, who then tags in Big Bobby. "The Sky Is The Limit for Bobby Lashley", screams Jim Ross, as Lashley tries to run wild, but Finlay can't be arsed to bump for a back elbow which staggers the crowd reaction. Bobby delivers a Texas Tornado punch that Kerry Von Erich did fifty times better despite having one foot. Lashley goes for a running powerslam, but Finlay escapes, only to be caught in a twisting T-Bone that ended up like a uranage, pretty slick. Big Show makes the save on a near fall. Cena is back in, and both babyfaces send Big Show to the ropes for a double clothesline, but Big Show has the same idea, and we get the rare TRIPLE CLOTHESLINE, and all three men are down.


Little Bastard re-appears, and Finlay picks him up. What follows next was a good idea on paper I'm sure, but in execution was a giant pile of gash. The idea was that Finlay would throw Little Bastard at Lashley, but Bobby would duck underneath the flying midget and spear Finlay, while the Bastard would be caught by Cena.


The timing was ballsed up, and so Lashley made glancing contact with Finlay who didn't fall, and Bobby ends up holding onto Fit with his hand and pulling him down to the mat, and it just looked like it fell out of a dog's balloon knot. Bastard was caught by Cena, who hoisted him up for the FU to a big reaction, but Big Show kicked Cena ending that excitement. Oh, and while that was going on, Lashley pinned Finlay while nobody was looking. Fugly.


Finlay has been eliminated by pinfall


It's 2-on-1, as Ebony and Ivory shoot Big Show off for a double shoulder tackle, but Show kicks out. Cena is tagged in and booed once more. Lashley and Cena try to execute a Double DDT on Big Show, but they're out of sync, it looks like three kids falling on the bed and the Philly fans grumble. A double suplex follows and once again Show kicks out. Finally, Show tries to make the heroic comeback against the odds, and clutches Cena around the throat. Lashley then illegally gets in the ring and charges, giving him what I assume was supposed to be a spear without the bump, just sort of ramming him in the bread basket. The impact sends Show recoiling backwards, rebounding off the ropes and into John Cena, who lifts him up for the FU. Announcers go crazy as they always do, selling it with shock and awe (despite Cena doing it three years ago at this very Pay-Per-View. You know, Big Show's Pay-Per-View), and it's enough to topple the big man for the final fall.


Big Show has been eliminated by pinfall


Survivors: John Cena and Bobby Lashley


Lilian Garcia announces the names of all five babyfaces as the winners, showing how much she'd figured out after seven years in the company.


The two babyfaces, white meat as could be (unless you're looking through Freebird goggles), then slap asses and hit the showers together. Lashley walks the wrong way out and leaves Cena alone to get the shot of him holding the spinner belt aloft to end the match.


And that's it. As meaningless as this seems and as throwaway as much of the PPV is, this match actually managed a highlight a lot of the flaws you have with this concept, as nostalgic as I am for it. You had a couple of things to accomplish - make Umaga a threat, get Lashley over, keep Cena strong. Accomplishing three things is quite a feat in one match, and any more would cloud the issue, so that's the positive.


The negative is you jobbed out 3 of the guys advertised for next week's December to Dismember PPV like it was no big deal within a 2 minute span. Big Show, the champ (and loser number 4 in next week's main event), stayed until the end, but they gave the win to Cena rather than Lashley, which would have made far more sense to create intrigue.


So we protect the few and kill the many, at a time where you have three brands and need as many stars as possible. So to wrap it up, a decent match, but decent is about it, which is all you're getting on this PPV.

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Survivor Series 2007


Contributor: Grecian


Match: The Great Khali vs Hornswoggle



There are a few matches to choose from – the cell match betwixt Batista and Undertaker that WWE managed to spoil by sticking Edge on the poster advertising it, Randy Orton defending his WWE title vs Shawn Michaels and the surprisingly entertaining bout between Team Triple H (Jeff Hardy, Kane and Rey Mysterio) vs Team Umaga (Kennedy, MVP, Finlay and Big Daddy V alongside the late Samoan savage). However, in the interests of self-flagellation, I’ve decided to ignore all of these, and will be watching The Great Khali vs Hornswoggle.


I have no reasons for doing this, other than – can it be as bad as I think it could be? I’ve not watched this match since 2007, I guess, and can’t remember a thing about it. Deep breath, here goes…


I join the Network at the end of the previous match, just in time to see Jeff Hardy swanton Umaga and win the match for Team Triple H. I’m immediately nostalgic for the Hardy push and world title win in 2008/09, those halcyon days before the drug arrest, TNA run and before the awesomeness of Broken Matt.

Pre-match build-up. Hornswoggle is nervously pacing around a dressing room with Regal and Coachman, looking worried. A quick spot of patronisation by Regal, inviting Horny to sit down and patting the chair. Is he talking to a dog?


Ah, here’s Vince to save us and give Horny the mother of all pep-talks. A quick game of McMahon bingo: says he beat WCW? Check. Beat the US Government? Check. Claims to have been an underdog? Check. Obligatory grapefruits mention? Check. Shane looks disturbed – BINGO! It seems to have done the trick and Horny looks all set for war.


The rarely seen tale-of-the-tape next. Khali weighs over 300 pounds more than Horny, who’s billed at 138lbs. Let’s break that down for a second – this makes him 9 stone 8lbs. At a supposed 4’4’’ tall, this gives him a BMI of 34.8, according to the good old NHS website. Are I supposed to be working out that Hornswoggle was clinically obese?


Back to the match. Here’s Shane, doing that dumbass dance. As someone who’s given up watching the weekly shows, does he still do that on Smackdown? He’s also fairly trim by his standards, and also appears to have thrown some business towards John Cena’s tailor for the evening. His big job seems to be to introduce Vince (McMahon bingo: there’s the walk!), and to nearly start laughing when calling Horny his ‘little brother’. He does seem to have forgiven his father’s adultery rather quickly, I guess the family fortune will do that to you.


JBL is parroting how proud Shane is of Horny, and even hollers ‘its David vs Goliath 2. It’s gonna be biblical!’ Jesus wept. Why did I think JBL was a decent commentator back then? Was he surrounded by that much shit that he shone?


Khali marches to the ring, with Ranjan Singh. Whatever happened to that guy? Cole introduces Khali as a former world champion. Those were dark days indeed. JBL reminds us that Hornswoggle is a former cruiserweight champion. Let’s hope TJ Perkins and Noam Dar never watch this match.


Let the match begin!


Nope, false alarm. Why have a match when you can stall, in WWE-comedy style? The rules are explained, with Ranjan translating. The crowd start chanting for Shaquille O’Neal, who’s sat ringside. A dude in the crowd nearly stacks it down a flight of stairs. That I’m watching the crowd should show how ‘entertaining’ this match is. They’ve not yet locked up – Vince is telling Shaq to sit down, and grabs a mic. McMahon bingo: a promo saying how he doesn’t care about the fans (ah, the days before the Universe)? Check.


Here we (finally!) go! Horny throws his jacket off, throws up his dukes… and kicks Khali in the shin, followed by a through-the-ropes kick for Ranjin. Khali has done nothing more than lift a leg and stand still so far. He’s not working hard, he’s working smart…


In his first offensive move, Khali slowly moves in a circle, shouts at Horny who bails. Horny slowly climbs back in, does the Tensai green mist spot to Singh. Singh’s taken more moves than Khali at this point – very wise of the soon-to-be Punjabi Playboy, letting Ranjin Singh, the worker in the match, carry the workload…


Horny disappears under the ring, gets a shillelagh. Khali disarms him, slaps Horny to the floor. Finally! Action! Let’s go! He prepares the Vice Grip… ah, shit, here’s Finlay. The ref calls for the bell before Finlay even connects with the shillelagh, following an intense 3:16 (oh, the sweet, sweet irony) of ‘action’.


In conclusion: at least this was quick and fairly inoffensive. It’s fun to play McMahon bingo. It’s a level of comedy (and I use that term as loosely as possible) above Jerry Lawler vs Michael Cole from Mania 27. On the downside, I could have done so much more with my life in that 3:16.

Survivor Series 2008


Contributor: Uncle Zeb


Match: Team HBK vs Team JBL



It is a brisk November night in Boston, Massachusetts, as a sold out crowd of 15,825 pack out the Boston Garden for the 22nd annual Survivor Series. And we are starting things off with a traditional 5-on-5 elimination tag team match, in which the teams are made up of Superstars from all three brands: Raw, SmackDown, and ECW.

Lilian Garcia explains that "the only way to be eliminated is by pinfall, submission, disqualification, or by countout," though carelessly neglects to specify that for the purposes of this match, a pinfall entails the referee's hand striking the mat three times and a countout will occur if either legal man is on the arena floor until the official's count of ten. How the live crowd managed to keep up, I have no idea.

Shawn Michaels arrives, making a record sixteenth appearance at a Survivor Series, and captaining his sixth team. Joining him in succession are Cryme Tyme (if you're looking to steal a victory, suggests Lawler, there are no better team mates), the Great Khali, and in contrast, Rey Mysterio. "The mask he's wearing tonight represents survival," we're told. The Punjabi Playboy is accompanied, irrelevantly, by Ranjin Singh.

The opposing team captain is JBL. "Does he have his whole team in that limo?" wonders Lawler. The answer is no. Walking out separately are MVP, the ECW team of The Miz and John Morrison, and a maskless Kane, making his eleventh Survivor Series appearance. "How will he get get on with his team mates?" the commentators ponder. Without any apparent awkwardness whatsoever, it turns out.

Mysterio and MVP start things off. Judging by the announcers' comments, the latter must be in the midst of his notorious losing streak, but he does get the first offence in against Rey until being quickly outmaneuvered.

Rey tags in JTG and the pair double-team MVP for a two-count. MVP then catches the Cryme Tyme member with a dropkick to the knees, and follows up with a shining wizard-cum-yakuza kick to his kneeling opponent for the clean pin. Two moves and JTG is done. Great team you've picked here, Shawn.

"MVP finally gets a victory," it's noted as he celebrates, but he turns straight into a Khali Chop and suffers the second pinfall of the match with a giant foot on his chest. We're 4-4.

Now it's time for the big man showdown between Khali and Kane. "Like King Kong squaring off with Godzilla," says Lawler (and it takes a king to know a king). Kane unloads but is first off his feet with a clothesline. The crowd chants for Khali as he elbows Kane in the corner, then powers out of an attempted chokeslam before tagging in Rey, who leaps off the giant's shoulders with a splash to pin the Big Red Monster. The babyfaces lead with four members to three.

John Morrison's straight on the attack, until Mysterio seizes an opening and tags in Shad. More double-teaming from the faces, with none from the heels so far. Big Shad delivers an impressive military press, dropping Morrison chest-first, Ultimate Warrior style, leading the Shaman of Sexy to make the heels' first tag of the match to his regular partner The Miz.

Making up for lost time, the pair make frequent tags while double-teaming the sole remaining Cryme Tyme member, until he catches them both with a double clothesline. A shitty rip-off of the People's Elbow allows Shad to set Miz up for what might be another signature move (presumably not the Rock Bottom, but it almost looks like it could be). Morrison interrupts however, allowing Miz to put Shad down for a three-count with the Reality Check neckbreaker. The teams are now down to three apiece.

Michaels decides it's time he led by example, stepping into the ring for the first time to tangle with The Miz. Morrison soon tags in for another spot of double-teaming, before introducing JBL to the match. Bradshaw lays into HBK, and we're reminded that he has a personal issue to settle - it was, after all, HBK who caused JBL to go into that Tombstone at the hands of The Undertaker. You remember.

Me neither, but in any case, The Miz is back in with targeted right hands to Michaels on the mat, and we can see that Shawn's eye has been cut by some punches he took from JBL in the corner. Matt Striker calls to mind the recent eye injury sustained from current World Champion Chris Jericho.

Morrison tags in to continue the assault, and HBK is forced to skin the cat (better than stoning a puppy, eh JR?), but falls victim to a leaping forearm, with Morrison kipping up in mimicry of his opponent's moveset. The tribute continues as he delivers a bodyslam and climbs the ropes for a flying elbowdrop, but takes too long about it and hits nothing but canvas.

The Miz tags in, followed by Mysterio, who overwhelms the ECW star with a 619 and springboard splash for the pin. It's 3-2 in favour of the faces, who haven't had to fight from behind once thus far.

Morrison almost falls foul to another 619 until JBL tags himself in and shoulder tackles Rey off his feet, beginning a sustained beat-down as the crowd chants "You can't wrestle." He and Morrison take turns to cut Rey off from his remaining team mates Shawn and Khali, as we're reminded that Layfield and Mysterio "battled over the WWE Championship for the best part of a year."

I'm not certain it was the best part, but I'll take them at their word.

Rey foils a back superplex attempt from JBL and hits a top rope moonsault to his standing opponent, busting up Bradshaw's lip. He won't be enjoying any tea parties here in Boston tonight.

Michaels tags in and delivers a leaping forearm, followed by a kip-up, taunting Morrison - that's how it's done. Inverted atomic drops to JBL, then a bodyslam, and up to the top rope in pursuit of an elbowdrop, but Morrison delays him long enough for JBL to roll out of the ring.

Undeterred, Shawn catches Bradshaw off-guard with a plancha. His victim then dodges a Superkick, but fails to re-enter the ring in time behind Michaels and finds himself counted out, forced to leave ringside by officials. We're down to 3-on-1.

While Shawn's busy crotch-chopping a flustered JBL, Morrison's readying some Sweet Chin Music behind him. Michaels turns and ducks under the kick before delivering one of his own to pick up the final win for his team.

After hoisting Rey onto his shoulders to celebrate, Khali then raises both partners' hands, with HBK in particular playing up that his arm's almost being pulled from its socket by the well-meaning giant. To solve the problem, Michaels climbs onto the bottom rope and Rey onto the middle, easing the height difference and creating what would be a great visual if the camera had zoomed out a little more to show it.

When I drew 2008 for this thread I really felt there'd be nothing of genuine interest on the show, but rewatching this match brought to my attention the great little story of John Morrison trying and failing to beat Shawn's team with his own signature moves. Of all the instances over the years of up-and-coming Superstars chasing success at HBK's expense by aping his tactics and mannerisms, this forgotten one-match arc strikes me as perhaps the most effective in its simplicity - at the time of execution, at least.

Survivor Series 2009


Contributor: rockbus


Match: John Cena vs Triple H vs Shawn Michaels – WWE Championship



When I first put my name forward for this I was certain I would review a traditional Survivor Series match, but when I was given 2009 there was only one option... the main event. WWE Champion John Cena taking on both of DX in a triple threat for the title. This is a match I remember absolutely loving. Or at least, I remember loving the first 30 seconds.

Shawn Michaels and HHH make their entrance together, whilst Michael Cole hypes up how together they are, how much of a unit they are, how they chose to come out as a team. But throws the question of doubt to his co-commentators Lawler and Striker. Lawler is insistent they are a unit, they will find a way to stay on the same page, but Striker isn't so sure. Cena enters to the normal mixed reaction. 

After the introductions the two members of DX face Cena. He looks worried. He's backed into a corner... and Michaels superkicks Trips! The place goes wild, and Cena's face changes from concern to shock, and Shawn takes advantage of the situation to take immediate control of the match. 

It's this point at which my memory ends and I'm watching with pretty much fresh eyes. Striker and Cole give the generic WWE commentary staples of the last time the title changed hands in this arena, and how polarising Cena is, while Lawler valiantly attempts to remind us how SHOCKING what we just saw was. Shawn keeps control of Cena for the first couple of minutes until Cena catches his coming off the ropes for an AA attempt reversed into a DDT for an early two count. Still no sign of Hunter as Michaels continutes to wear down Cena and places him in a figure four. Cena reverses whilst Matt Striker does his best to take any sort of drama out of the match whatsoever with some nonsense I'm trying but failing to tune out. 

We go to the outside as Cena is thrown to the floor. Michaels follows and starts to strip the announce table. There's only one which looks bizarre and depleted compared to the 3 shoehorned in for most events today. At the last moment Cena grabs Michaels and once again goes for the AA. But here comes HHH! He's saved his partner and they're back on the same page. For about nine seconds until he puts Shawn through the table with a spinebuster. 

We see some replays whilst Striker talks about just how much the WWE Championship means as it rips friendships apart. It's Trip's turn to work over Cena. He's had barely a sniff of offense in this first ten minutes as DX take their turns with him. It's two matches in one, HHH vs Cena and Michaels Vs Cena is how the announce team are selling this, as a way of making us forget that moves which would normally put someone down for a two count incapacitate them for 7 minutes. Tripper's dominance is starting to pay off as he goes for the pedigree, but Cena reverses into a slingshot and HHH conveniently leaps 8 feet toward the turnbuckle as he falls over. Both men are wobbly and HHH covers for 2 following a weak clothesline. 

Cena and HHH trade blows before Cena hits the running shoulderblock and heads into the five knuckle shuffle. Michaels is back in the nick of time to save his buddy from the AA. He throws Cena into the corner and they face off. A weak shove from HHH to Shawn before Cena rushes them. HHH throws him aside like a Bushwacker in a Rumble and Michaels once again takes advantage of the situation with an inverted atomic drop and some chops, bringing the woos from a crowd who have been pretty much dead since the initial super kick. Trips reverses with a high knee and they trade blows until both men collapse, allowing Shawn to kip up into a spinebuster. Shawn reverses an attempted pedigree with a back drop (which probably didn’t aggravate his near career ending back injury despite Striker's best attempts to convince us it might have) and he heads to the top. He stumbles long enough for Cena to knock him back and the champ heads to the top himself but misses the leg drop onto HHH. Michaels continues his climb and hits his elbow drop on Cena before HHH throws him to the outside. Cena's popped back up and takes down HHH into the STF. Michaels saunters across the ring bizarrely slowly and climbs onto both men to put Cena into a crossface of his own, which he reverses into an AA attempt and another STF. Michaels weakens but eventually reaches the ropes. 

The crowd are starting to pick up as they feel the match heading towards its conclusions. HHH is nowhere to be seen as both men stagger around before Michaels his another Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere, this time on the champ. HHH returns before he can make the cover and heads toward Michaels, but BANG! Another superkick to his partner and HHH falls onto Cena as Michaels falls from the ring from exhaustion. Trips is covering Cena but the ref doesn't even notice as he checks on Shawn, before eventually turning round... 1... 2... Cena kicks out! 

We see replays as Michaels lays outside the ring and the other two competitors lay prone inside it. The crowd attempt some three way duelling chants before realising that’s a bad idea and settle on arguing over whether Cena sucks or not. HHH and Cena reach their feet at the same moment and the champ hits the AA. Both he and Michaels crawl toward HHH and pin him at the same moment but the kick out comes at 2 and the announcers argue over who would have been champion if he'd stayed down. This has slowed right down again, until a ridiculous segment where everybody attempts to hit their finisher (and even each others) with no success before Michaels hits Sweet Chin Music no.36 of the night once again onto his best friend and partner. Cena grabs Michaels, and hits the AA, launching him onto HHH's already prone body. Cena covers HHH and overcomes the odds to retain the WWE Championship against both of DX. 

Michael Cole reminds us how John Cena has once again survived and Cena celebrates. 

It's not a surprise I only remembered the first thirty seconds. I remember thinking at the time that there had to be a swerve but I was surprised just how quickly in the match it came, but with hindsight, that fantastic moment was simply a method of turning this into a standard triple threat match. Nothing more, nothing less. It was enjoyable enough but no man ever got out of second gear at any point. Overall a disappointment, but I'm glad I've taken the time to go back and remember it for what it was, an average triple threat match, brought to life for short periods by Shawn Michael's ability to tell a story with his actions.

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Survivor Series 2010


Contributor: Onyx2


Match: Team Rey v Team Del Rio: Big Show, Chris Masters, Kofi Kingston, MVP & Rey Mysterio vs "Dashing" Cody Rhodes (pre-tache), Jack Swagger, Drew McIntyre, Tyler Reks & Alberto Del Rio.



I’ve never seen this event. I’d recently left my job at Silver Vision and to be honest, didn’t need to see any more wrestling for about three years. So I missed most of Nexus, Corre, Summer of Punk etc. I looked at the card and was distinctly underwhelmed. The main event was Orton v Barrett with John Cena as ref, involving some complicated stipulation about Cena being fired at the end. But I do love the Survivor Series team matches, so went with that one.

There appears to be no backstory to this match, beyond the fact that it’s Survivor Series and they need an elimination tag. Wikipedia offers me no explanation, although Vince wanted to do away with the Survivor Series name but an online backlash persuaded him to keep it. So I guess they kinda had to run one of these.

The show comes from Miami. I’m afraid to say Striker is on commentary. Before the match there’s a heel team promo and it’s pretty decent. Jack Swagger shows real determination and conviction, boasting of being “the only former world champion on the team”. Alberto Del Rio does a surprisingly good promo. Not outstanding but shows proper grit as he promises to "destroy Rey Mysterio and his little friends".

On to the entrances: we have Super Smiley Big Show, Chris Masters oiled up the wazoo, ME HEAR DEM SHOUTIN, MVP gets a HUGE pop as a hometown hero, and roof blows off for Rey.

Cody Rhodes appears who excellently turns the ‘tron into a mirror, while Lawler says it "looks like his neck threw up", Swagger looking like, well hench, “Chosen One” Drew bowls down, Tyler Reks (I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen this guy wrestle - every time I read his name I thought of Tyler “Seth Rollins” Black instead) and ADR does the Rodriguez & Rolls Royce entrance.

ADR is an excellent heel here. His face is full of life, excitement and real energy. Goes to lock up with Rey but tags out to Cody before he even gets a hand laid on him. I’ve never seen this Del Rio before. Wiki says his TV debut was August 2010 so he was very fresh. He’s clearly being made a big deal of, and getting bigged up on commentary.

A couple of minutes in, MVP drops a Ballin’ elbow early on. I wonder if he’s going to be eliminated - oh, he is. Obviously as a hometown hero, he gets jobbed out in no time at all and looks like a complete chump. The crowd are chanting for him like crazy. I never understand this type of booking. Let the crowd enjoy their local hero!

Chris Masters is given no time as ADR submits him out in no time to get his arm bar over. Big Show enters to genuinely rapturous reception and Alberto again chickens out perfectly and shoves Swagger in. Show is in one of those phases where he’s booked like an absolute monster, skillet chops and slams galore. Swagger takes out Show’s leg and ADR comes back in to give Show a slap he bursts back into life. Again Del Rio chickens out and forces the tag on McIntryre. ADR gets blasted with a Big Show right hand and sells it like death. So much so in fact that this counts as his elimination, so he’s protected from taking a pinfall. 

Cody takes a slap to the cheek from Kofi but then has a fantastic strop outside, pleading with the timekeeper to hold his jacket up to check his face because it has a mirror on the back :-D Love it.

Cody swaps a few fists with Show which doesn’t end well, so Reks launches in with a huge lariat to floor Show. We’re now down to Kofi, Rey, Show v Swagger, Reks, McIntyre.

Swagger locks the first of many ankle locks on but manages to tag a fired-up Rey in who is so full of energy. I’ve said all year Rey would have a great landscape to come back to. Why isn’t he in the cruisers, or working with NXT to help the smaller guys? Rey works on an excellent counter from the ankle lock to a kinda-headscissors.

Reks against Kofi. With a nasty looking upside down mule kick in the corner Reks is taken out. A Thunder in Paradise countered into another ankle lock means it’s the end for Kofi as sure enough Swagger forces him to tap. Striker is putting Swagger over huge here. I’m still surprised Swagger didn’t get a bigger run. Rey climbs on Show’s shoulders but Drew takes out the leg. Swagger Bomb isn’t enough to take out Rey. Rey takes to Show’s shoulders again and takes out Swagger with a splash. We’re now Drew v Rey / Show, but all it takes is a huge right hand to Drew and happy smiley finish. 

Everyone “got their shit in” here so it’s not boring. But look at the teams: only three of them are still employed by WWE, and of those neither Big Show nor Swagger have any storylines - Show in particular has been absent pretty much all year (I’m the last remaining Big Show fan) whereas Kofes is having the time of his life. You never ever need to watch this match unless you were inclined to see glimpses of an excellent Alberto Del Rio. Looking at the Raw results for the next night, nothing came of it either. A complete throwaway match that only exists to keep the event its name, and give some of the guys a payday. A very nothingy match.

To be honest I’ve never enjoyed ADR’s work so was pleasantly surprised by his performance. I’ll leave you with some faces of Rio:






Survivor Series 2011


Contributor: TheBurningRed


Match: Team Barrett vs Team Orton



So the main matches on this show were Alberto Del Rio vs CM Punk for the WWE title and The Rock and John Cena vs The Miz and R-Truth. This would be the start of Punks 434 day reign after multiple setbacks and shenanigans since he won the title first time around at Money in the Bank. And this show also featured The Rocks first match in seven years. But I'm not going to review either match. Instead I'm going to review the traditional Survivor Series match.


Wade Barrett teamed with Cody Rhodes, Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger and Hunico. While Orton team with Sheamus, Mason Ryan, Kofi Kingston and Sin Cara. Why Ryan is in his match and not Kofi's partner Evan Bourne, I don't know.


Dolph replaced an injured Christian and was pulling double duty for the second PPV in a row. He had retained his US Title in the opener against John Morrison. He didn't last long as Orton eliminated him 90 seconds into the match with an RKO. Is it me or this Hunico look taller now as Sin Cara? Original Sin Cara and Kofi did stereo planchas to the outside to Hunico and Swagger but Cara didn't get over properly which lead to him being eliminated due to injury. He ruptured a tendon and was out for 6 months. After Kingston and Barrett go at it, Ryan and Hunico tagged in. Ryan was instantly booed. I don't recall his face turn at all and no one seems to care for him. The crowd didn't boo so much when he started chucking Hunico around the ring. Cody got the blind tag, hit Ryan with the Beautiful Disaster and a Cross Rhodes to eliminate the big Welsh man and got a good pop from the crowd.


Sheamus comes in and beats the hell out of Cody. Barrett distracted Sheamus and then the heels start to take control. Sheamus gets the hot tag to Kofi who runs wild on Barrett. Barrett turns it around when Kofi gets caught in the ropes. Big boot and a Wasteland send Kofi packing. Orton comes in to face Barrett. He also takes a suicide dive from Hunico who Booker calls the ace in the hole. I don't think we're watching the same Hunico. This was the year when WWE commentary was at its worse, especially with Cole and Booker T. After taking a beating from all the heels, Orton makes a hot tag to Sheamus


Sheamus cleans house. While working over Swagger, he beats the shit out of him with multiple knees while Swagger is at the ropes leading to a DQ and leaving Orton alone. Frustrated, Swagger eats a Brogue Kick and Orton covers him and now its 1 vs 3. Orton starts with his five moves of doom, planting Rhodes with the rope hung ddt. Hunico tries a springboard manuever but gets hit with a great RKO and he's gone.


Barrett tries to sneak attack Orton but Orton counters into a back breaker. He goes to RKO Barrett but Cody gets involved and eats the RKO instead. Barrett uses this opening to hit Orton with Wasteland and it's over.


An average match but a pleasantly surprising ending where we didn't get the complete hero comeback and Barrett picked up a big win over Randy. They'd go on to have quite a decent Tables match at TLC the next month and the other man standing, Cody Rhodes, would retain his IC title at the same show in a forgettable match with Booker T. This match was worth watching but nothing memorable stands out.

Survivor Series 2012


Contributor: The Hitman     


Match: Big Show vs Sheamus



Survivor Series 2012 is a show of historical significance as it served as the genesis of The Shield. Since that group splintered, its members have almost perennially reigned as world champion in the ensuing years. So obviously for a show that was so pivotal in shaping the current era of WWE, I’ve opted for a midcard match featuring two big guys smacking each other.

My reasoning is purely selfish, I’m a big man of the little round-robin Big Show, Sheamus and Mark Henry seemed to have going over the World Heavyweight Championship at this time and thus I’ve picked Big Show vs Sheamus. I never actually saw this match, or indeed this show when it first aired so for me this could be a hidden gem, as I love the hard-hitting big man battles from this era of Smackdown.

We start with the news that World Champion show angered Sheamus by smacking around his good friend William Regal. I have no recollection of this but it apparently makes Big Show a heel, which is always good to know. Sheamus comes out and does his chest-pounding business, which is then copied by Brock Lesnar Guy sat in the front row in the same shirt he’s been wearing since the Raw after Wrestlemania in 2012. It must be rancid by now as the attention-seeking twerp still turns up to every show in it to this day. Show follows and as his music stops he removes the belt from his shoulder, forgetting the traditional championship introduction. When the announcements begin he sheepishly puts the strap back over his shoulder and hopes nobody noticed.

The match gets under way with Big Show shouting something at his opponent, but this only results in a massive glob of spit flying from his giant tongue and no words are discernible. Whatever he said it certainly riled the Celtic Warrior, as he jumps straight on show with forearms and kicks. Keeping the pace going, the big man fires back with knees and body punches before landing a killer short clothesline on the challenger. JBL starts to bang on about boxing, but for once these words hold some weight as this has been pure striking since the get go. 

Show takes him to the corner and unleashes the overhand chops but interestingly he doesn’t do the “shush” thing, which is odd as I thought he’d been doing that for donkeys. Sheamus rallies back with a sweet chop block and Show takes a lovely bump off it. For a big man he can certainly take a nice bump, he fucking glided from that. Big Show is now tied in the ropes just like his father (ahem) Andre The Giant, and Sheamus hits the ten big forearms. Cole doesn’t call it that shit name he calls it now, and it always grates on me when he does. I can’t even remember it, Ten Beats of The Something.


While I’m still trying to remember that move’s name Sheamus hits a flying messy clothesline, forearmy thing. He basically jumps at Show and flails his arms into his face but it looks like it hurts so that’s fine. He then ascends to the top rope, amazingly without JBL screaming “we’ve got ourselves a flying Irishman Maggle!” but is caught by a hard shoulder block to the stomach. Cole yelps “spear!” a bunch of times but Show doesn’t even try and wrap his arm round Sheamus, it’s pure shoulder so I’m not having that. Both men are now down and this is the first breather we’ve had in a fast-paced, hard-hitting encounter. This is everything I loved about Smackdown’s super-heavyweights.


Show is up first and blowing hard, he gives Sheamus a massive bodyslam and the pace begins to drop. Lawler calls it methodical but in reality show looks fucked. He hits a headbutt that took longer to arrive than the third Ghostbuster’s film and then just kinda stares at Sheamus with a mean look on his perspiring face. Cole calls Show/Rock/HHH in 99 “one of the all time great survivor series match-ups” The fact I know I’ve seen it but can barely remember it apart from the result speaks volumes. Is it worth a rewatch or is Cole just trying too hard to fill time as Show ambles about doing fuck all? You decide.The announcers now list Show’s career achievements as he does the odd move and mainly stares at Sheamus sweatily.


More headbutts follow and Sheamus is taking the slowest beating of all time. Show chokes him in the ropes. The usually overbearing commentators are doing a good job of putting Show’s dominance over, way more than anything he’s doing in the ring. Flying shoulder tackle by Sheamus but Show cuts him off with a nice superkick. Lawler calls it a brogue kick because he was past caring even in 2012. BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG elbow to a floored Sheamus by Show. The champion throws back to one of the big men of old, paying tribute to Yokozuna with a nervehold that ends up as sort of an armbar. Sheamus lays in some right hands but walks into a sidewalk slam. Big Show pulls a face and mumbles something indecipherable. Sheamus big boots him and sticks him in a sleeper. In the 80s this match would have got massive reactions but a modern crowd is silent. The action has tailed off since that hot start, but hopefully it’ll pick up a bit with the Irishman on offence.


Sheamus with a fiery comeback that nobody cares about followed by running into the ringpost as he tries a shoulderblock. Sidewinder from Show but Sheamus kicks out to no reaction. The action is improving but the crowd are slow to wake up. They do come back to life when Sheamus zaps the 7 footer with a cracking electric chair drop and they buy into the near fall that follows. That is some serious strength from Sheamus. Both men are on their knees exchanging strikes and the crowd are firmly back. This is the clobbering I signed up for, potatoes are on the menu tonight!

Sheamus is a house of fire now as he batters Show with high knees and axe handles. We know what the Giant was resting up for now, as he’s taking some serious bumps now. The crowd are roaring their approval now as Sheamus looks for the Brogue Kick, he’s cut off and Show attempts a chokeslam which is reversed into WHITE NOISE! 1….2….NO as Vince McMahon might have put it. It is mad to look back at how over Sheamus was before the years of 50-50 booking and frequent turns taking their toll. The WWE Universe are willing him to land another Brogue Kick, nowadays the fans would probably be chanting “PWG” or “we hate gingers” or something but as recently as 2012 there is a crowd here fully invested in essentially an 80s big man match.

The referee ends up eating the Brogue Kick as the wily veteran champion pulls him in the way. Trainers, EMTs referees down. He don’t have a damn clue where he is. Despite the assembled throng all tending to the downed official, Sheamus is a conscientious lad so he joins them and completely ignores the 500 pound world champion fighter behind him. Paying the full price for this, he is drilled by the KO Punch and pinned for the 3. As the champ saunters up the aisle, the officials have a conflab and after much gesticulating they agree that Show should be disqualified for dragging their unfortunate colleague in the way of the Brogue Kick.


Show is fucking livid despite keeping the belt. Perhaps he wanted to hear his own music instead of Sheamus’, or perhaps he’s kayfabing over losing that old Monsoon favourite “the winner’s share of the purse” We need to bring that back. It’d bring some much-needed gravitas to Golden Truth vs Breezango. Maybe. 


The winner’s share of the purse isn’t enough for the angry Irishman, he wants Big Gold and he lets Big Show know it with some brutal chairshots. The crowd lap it up as a WWE babyface is allowed to show some much needed fire and badassery. However it reaches the point where a half-crippled Show, with his big sulky eyes tearing up, is begging Sheamus to stop and it all gets a bit excessive. Sheamus agrees to put the chair down, and then immediately nails Show with the elusive Brogue Kick.


The match started out hot but slowed down to a crawl in the middle while Show got his breath back. The finishing sequence was scorching and at 14 minutes it wasn’t a chore to sit through at all. A decent entry into my treasured Smackdown big man pantheon, but both would have better bouts with each other and Mark Henry.

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