Jump to content

Wrestlers Who Look Shit


LEGIT

Recommended Posts

I don't think anybody from a major promotion is going to top that Kassius Ohno pic.

 

Having a bright yellow right hand didn't help.

 

6366fa1a5ca3760736335dc87a4dad81_1024.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 83
  • Created
  • Last Reply
I don't think anybody from a major promotion is going to top that Kassius Ohno pic.

 

Having a bright yellow right hand didn't help.

 

6366fa1a5ca3760736335dc87a4dad81_1024.jpg

 

 

Theres quite a few Bbritish wrestlers that look no better than Chris Hero. No wonder WWE dropped him

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members
Greg the Hammer Valentine.... Fat old boring look.

 

"It takes the hammer 15 minutes to get warmed up..."

 

28mlkia.jpg

 

Always thought the Rock, of all people, looked crap when he wore that shirt after getting his boob job in 1998.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dr. Tom Prichard in the Heavenly Bodies for me - always looked like a lesbian. He may be the only wrestler I can remember with an actual legitimate woman's fringe.

 

I'm probably going easy on Jimmy Del Ray for not including them as a package deal - I got into the WWF in 1994 and had a bit of a love/hate relationship with the Heavenly Bodies. I thought they looked completely ridiculous and wasn't quite sure if they were there to laugh at. But when they stopped showing up on WWF Superstars, I missed them.

 

Christ, this has led me to google Jimmy Del Ray and apparently he was 32 at that point! I honestly thought he was around his actual age now (50'ish) back then. Not sure about shittest, but surely the oldest looking wrestler ever.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members
I don't think anybody from a major promotion is going to top that Kassius Ohno pic.

 

Challenge accepted.

 

colin-delaney05.jpg

TNA_Bound_for_Glory_39.jpg

 

and this one may not be quite as bad as Ohno, but considering he's the champ in this pic:

 

James%20Storm%20TNA.png

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wrestlers can get away with being small and out of shape if it suits their gimmick. Colin Delany might not look great compare to the general public but his character needed someone who was short, skinny, ugly and pale. There's a big difference between looking shit when you're meant to and then looking like shit when you're supposed to be a hard cunt who knocks people out by elbowing them to their head. If Hero was brought into the WWE as a virgin nerd who talks about Meltzer in promos as a piss take on smarks, he'd have a great look, but you can't look like shit and expect people to buy you as a tough guy.

 

Kevin Steen is another. If he was seen as being a fat, pathetic slob who tripped over his own feet, he'd have a great look, but he wants to sell himself as being legitimate when he doesn't look it. It doesn't work. Super Dragon has always portrayed himself as a badass yet he's a flabby, pasty guy in maternity pants.

 

Guys like Foley and Necro Butcher look like shit but that works for them and if they were tanned, 6'4" and ripped, they couldn't get away with that sort of gimmick. It's not about one uniform good physique, each look has to match the gimmick that the wrestler is trying to portray.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members

I'm taking all that as a given; I understand there are extenuating circumstances when gimmicks come into play. I posted those pics purely from a perspective of actuality, rather than context; was mainly being facetious.

 

Apart from Storm. He's great to watch, but his physique has been downright disgraceful at times.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Paid Members

Deep in my photobucket, which I only remembered I still had a few weeks ago, was this beauty:

 

mullen_lg2.png

 

Here, for contrast, is the fat lad buffet he was fueled by:

 

yxcopy.jpg

 

As a bonus, here's the gorgeous Buck Dixon:

 

80aee10b7dbuckdixon.jpg

 

I did a double take, because it looks like a shit photoshop job of someone's gormless cousin onto a failed wrestler's body.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Rock N Roll Express always looked like shit to me. A great tag team obviously, but for supposed "heart throbs" they were a right odd looking pair...

 

rock-n-roll-express_288x288.jpg

 

They were both in OK shape in the very early days but after about '93 they started to look pretty pathetic. Gibson had always just looked like someone's hairy Dad wrestling and Morton looked more like a women every passing year.

 

They stuck out like a pair of flabby sore thumbs in the WWF in '97...

Screen%20shot%202012-08-17%20at%2015.06.35%20(2).JPG

 

...and they still wrestled for over 10 more years on and off after that WWF run, where they slowly morphed into Pauline and Arthur Fowler...

0.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Samoa Joe when he had a BBC painted on the side of his mug.

 

I think Samoa Joe's look is shit full stop. Obviously he's in terrible shape, but there are allowances that can be made for the classic 'fat Samoan' physique given the right overall look. But with other examples of this, like Fatu/Rikishi or Jamal/Umaga, they always had a slightly wild look to them with the dreads or the goatees that made them look like the sort of fuckers who might smash a tankard over your head if you called them a fatty balatty. Joe, on the other hand, with his doughy babyface and his unfashionable frizzy short-back and sides, looks like a fat lad about to do Elvis at the school end-of-term talent show. Throw in his occasionally lobster-tanned skin and swim shorts, and he looks like he's about to do a running bomb into a hotel pool in Benidorm.

 

EDIT: Completely agree with Dirty Eddie on the Rock & Roll Express. They've always looked like they wandered out of a Status Quo tribute band.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators

In minor trivia, Buck Dixon is Henry Godwin's son.

 

I know his nickname played on the irony of it, but I'm glad 'Beautiful' Bobby Eaton never made it into the HD era.

 

19.jpg

 

Horrendous body, terrible hair, and capable of only one facial expression, the "man looking into stiff breeze."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...