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The Official UKFF RAW Thread...


d-d-d-dAz

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You're always destined to look a dickhead whenever you go down the Russo route of, "this is real, lads!" because there's nowhere you can go from there, but still. Even I couldn't have predicted how quickly they'd go from, "you won't be fighting the character! Hey, remember when Ric's son died?!" to fortnight-old Spice Girl jokes off Twitter. Impressive.

I'm happy for the women that they get to close the show, and anyone who doesn't think Becky in particular deserves it can get in the bin, but has anything ever screamed, "piss break," more than that Women's Tag Title match? Fuck me. The more things change, the more they stay the same. What a bunch of shirtarses. Beth and Nattie have their work cut out for them to carry that lot. And I'm absolutely including Bayley and Sasha here, who've looked terrible for the longest time.

 

Edited by Supremo
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The bit about Batista recently realising Evolution was set up for Hunter to keep the belt was very odd. Partly because the other week they made a point of how this was real SHOOT HEAT and not about wrestling characters, and partly because their 2005 feud was all about Batista noticing that Evolution was all about HHH keeping the belt.

It was a flat show that gave me lots of negative feelings. The shoehorning in of real life stuff to all the WrestleMania builds doesn't make it more immersive, it just renders everything silly. Becky doing her rebel routine pandering to the "don't tell me who to like, Vince, you're not my real dad" crowd rings very hollow at this point, but fair play to her, she carries herself with the absolute confidence of a star and comes across as one, with more presence than anyone on the show besides Reigns and Charlotte. Ronda, of course, is the biggest star on the show, but her absurd hardman walk, angry-nervous promos and "oh this is one of your gay fake gimmicks" stuff is weak, although the beat the clock challenge really was a bullshit gimmick on this show. McIntyre's "Joe the man got cancer and has kids, I'm evilll" bullshit is no better. Triple H and Batista is a mess.

Kurt Angle still doesn't look like he knows what's going on. He's been like that the entire time he's been back in WWE, and for years in TNA. At some point in the last ten years or so, his eyes went mental and vacant and never returned to normal. He did as well as could be expected of him now though.

It's mad how quickly the women's tag belts have become forgettable, but then, Bayley and Sasha are complete shite. The Iiconics are great at the pre-match bit, but they're gonna struggle once the bell rings. Nia, Tamina, Natalya and Beth Phoenix are wastes of time. None of these eight should be near a WrestleMania card. The titles would be showcased better being presented to a decent team (which I suppose is just the Riott Squad, or Mandy and Sonya at a push) in a thirty-second backstage skit.

But despite the negativity about the build, I still think the big matches look cracking on paper. Once HHH and Big Dave get out there, the shooty bollocks won't matter and they'll hopefully deliver, looking more at Goldberg vs Lesnar than HHH's last two singles matches at Mania. Kofi getting his big shot is gonna be a great moment. Rollins and Brock should be lovely. Charlotte's one of the best wrestlers in the world and Ronda and Becky can hold up their end of a big match, so the main event should be a safe bet to be a corker. The spotlight's on, they'll surely choreograph the fuck out of it to work out the kinks. 

My favourite thing on the show was actually the Finn Balor match. I was not expecting to derive any enjoyment from him facing Lashley (again) and Jinder (again), but it was kept short and sweet and made great use of the little lackeys. Loads of fun, one of my favourite Balor matches and must be my favourite Jinder match. Finn seemed like an awesome babyface rather than the bland moveset guy he often comes across as. I hope the Mania match is similar - Finn can come down in his Papa Lazarou outfit, have a mad spot with Lio Rush, and beat Lashley in about two to three minutes and I'll be happy.

Corbin's fairly good at playing the dick and there's potential there for him to get massive heat. In NXT a few times, they capitalised on it well. On the main roster, he's come on a long way, but it's hard to see him ever getting that heat. His smug, laid-back performance would be great if the writing prolonged him getting his comeuppance, but he gets battered and humiliated all the time so instead he's just a dull monotone heel who doesn't give much of a shit either way.

Alexa Bliss is superb! She has this horrible, twisted, inauthentic smile the whole time and I love it. 

I'm excited for Elias' concert at Mania. Got to be leading to an appearance from Rock, Undertaker or Cena. 

Edit: What a big fucking miserable wall of text. That’s what happens when I watch the full episode rather than the YouTube highlights.

Edited by King Pitcos
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I hoped they'd do a big angle to re-heat the Women's Triple Threat and boy did they deliver. Quite possibly the best go-home angle in Wrestlemania history. What a blast! Absolutely electric. I can't remember the last time they did something so fun. So many great moments and it kept getting better and better. Ronda and Becky suddenly realising they were sat next to each other in the cop car and going mental, the window getting smashed through, Ronda managing to drive the cop car, Charlotte kneeing the fuck out of Rousey as she stuck her head out of the smashed window, I fucking LOVED this. I'm convinced whoever came up with it was taking inspiration from Conor McGregor smashing up Khabib's bus last year but this was even better than that! Reportedly the crowd gave the segment a standing ovation afterwards. Absolutely deserved. I haven't sat with such a dumb grin on my face since when Ronda started beating up Triple H at Wrestlemania last year.

Also, thank God they decided to go with Winner Takes All rather than Win-the-Belt-if you-Pin-a-Champ rules. I'd like to think they came to their senses in the last day or two but I wouldn't be at all surprised if this was always the plan and Meltzer just got the wrong end of the stick again.

Batista also delivered promo of the year. So, so great. It's a shame this is probably it for Big Dave. I'll miss him.

On the other end of the spectrum, Corbin is absolutely shit, Sasha continues to botch everything she tries and Finn Balor simply doesn't have the chops to pull off the Demon stuff. The noises and facials after Finn, "transformed," were hokey as fuck.

Who cares though? They're probably gonna release three mugshots in the next few hours and I'm going to burst with delight. Absolutely phenomenal.

Edited by Supremo
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As the three ladies were being carted off to the back I said aloud "This is fucking stupid" which, considering how much WWE I've watched, is not something I really do. But then....then the backstage stuff happened. I laughed my ass off. It was still stupid but it was entertaining, hilarious stupid. I'm trying to picture how they discussed coming up with the whole thing before the show, having their three Mania main eventers just kick away at each other while being carried out the building like petulant brats. It doesn't sound like it could ever work. Not to mention using the whole handcuffs/arrest stuff again so soon. But, simply, it was really amusing stuff. As usual, no point over-thinking these things really...

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I was stupid whining about a Russorific stipulation that isn't even happening yesterday then!

Ridiculous angle with the three of them being arrested and then smashing up cop cars. Ludicrous. But wildly entertaining. 

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I'll happily take ludicrous but wildly entertaining over a lot of the boring shit they churn out on a weekly basis.

That was genuinely a lot of fun to watch and I really hope the Mania crowd manages to give them a decent response even after sitting there for so many hours.

On paper it looks like a solid card but as usual crowd fatigue will be the biggest issue.

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This is probably a tad optimistic of me, but I wonder if they’ll have Angle tap out Corbin in seconds before he issues one last open challenge, with Cena accepting, mirroring his Smackdown debut. 

Granted that particular moment is more important to Cena’s career than it is Angle’s, but given how much they acknowledge how disappointing this match is to some it makes me feel like something is amiss (other than, y’know, the match itself)

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7 minutes ago, RedRooster said:

Granted that particular moment is more important to Cena’s career than it is Angle’s

Which is exactly why, mirroring Angle's official debut, his WrestleMania opponent will be Shawn Stasiak. 

Edited by Onyx2
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Seth and Brock's scuffle made me realise that they're probably going to have a great match on Sunday. I've been so fixated on how out of place Seth has felt since Roman returned that it didn't even occur to me that Seth's the type of opponent Brock usually puts effort in for. Didn't they once have a belter of a three-way with John Cena? Maybe at a Royal Rumble one year?

Also, shout out to EC3's sulky face being grouped with the rest of the worthless jobbers. Never has someone seemed so outraged at being slotted so fairly. He's absolutely rubbish and it's not at all surprising that they quickly realised where he belonged.

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EC3 had no chance in WWE the way they brought him in and then up. I still think there's enough there that it could have worked had they fleshed out the character and made him a heel. He could have done some good work with vignettes and a spoilt rich kid gimmick. But it's frightening how much better he was than everyone else in TNA in terms of look and mic work and how painfully average he is in WWE and his ring work isn't even average. Moreover, it makes it fucking criminal how TNA treated AJ Styles considering he walked straight into WWE and never looked out of place for a second.

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