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Fantasy Matches from Hell


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Create the shittest match you can think of. I'm not talking about Russo-style pole matches or anus explosion deathmatches, I mean just the two shittest competitors you can think of that just would not work well. Matches you see on a card and just know will be awful. This really could be a list of matches involving Steve McMichael.


Steve McMichael vs. David Flair

Steve McMichael vs. Vincent

Steve McMichael vs. Ron or Don Harris


Some non-Mongo matches :

New Jack vs. Power Uti

Nathan Jones vs. Luther Reigns

The Great Khali vs. Tensai

Horace Hogan vs. David Flair

Wes Briscoe/Garrett Bischoff vs. Sam Shaw/Alex Silva

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Giant Silva vs. The Great Khali would be a decent candidate for this thread, except New Japan made it a reality in 2007:




I was oddly disappointed by this because I generally enjoy giant vs giant matches for the spectacle of it all. All they need to do is some stalling and staring down, a bit of clubberng, then they just need to put over how hard it is for each to move the other and then throw in a couple of half decent spots where one does in fact succeed in knocking over the other. Them being big and slow and immobile shouldn't be a problem at all, and in this match I think the issue is that Khali starts to take bumps for things way before they actually happen, so these two massive guys smacking into each other has no impact whatsoever. I assume it's because he's trying to protect himself but it makes it look like he has the worst timing of anyone ever. The running... thing... that happens before the finish looks utterly atrocious and it's mostly because Khali is already sitting down before he gets touched.


Also the chokeslam is baaad.


Also don't do a fucking abdominal stretch guys. You're not supposed to be wrasslin' out there.


Silva getting thrown off the top rope was cool though, and I'd say Silva has a better idea of how to work as a giant than Khali. Just looking at the crowd and roaring as if to say "look how fucking massive I am!!!" is all you really need to do and he has that down at least.


It's worth noting that this clip features the best 4 minutes of what, according to the on screen graphic, was a 10 minute match. Ewww.

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