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UKFF Rap Battle 2013 - Group B QF1

John Matrix

The winner is...  

25 members have voted

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You have until 09:00 on Wednesday 3rd of July to vote for your favourite rapper.


Each has until that time to submit one 16 line response so you choose to vote blindly, based on the first effort, or you can wait until you've heard both raps.


Toilet Rapper


So we
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I'm worried, are you trying to beat me for competition or pleasure?

This ain't no Brokback Mountain, I'm sure as hell not Heath Ledger


I won't go down without a fight, that title is my treasure

I'll put my foot up your ass, with a pin perfect measure


However, I'm getting bored of this 10 year old rhyming bit

It's like battling a moron with a dictionary that doesn't know he's shit


You used blocks twice, what a crock of horse dick

16 lines and you can't even recognize, are you a bit thick?


You say you're the King, maybe I'm the young pretender

But the next round goes down with you getting killed in a blender


And Tetris? How old are you, like fucking 40?

Fitting blocks in cramped spaces, like a normal Saturday for you, right shorty?


I went GTA 4 on this, I merked your ass

Dragged you out of your car, dildo bashed you till you pass


I may go down with a loss, but the real king keeps fighting

Be careful with your glory holes, I hear your prone to biting.

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Only two votes so far? I expected three,

Oh no, of course, your mum voted for me.

She knew, you knew, I knew it would be,

A scandal for your whole family,

And thought to herself, quite naturally,

How can I dodge this catastrophe?

Anticipating this attempt to flee,

I sent her an email, just to see,

If she was tempted by my photography,

She was, I responded, delicately,

That I was Fame where your dad was Glee,

And there's a spot in my German bed f

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Aces. Like Feste last year, Coconut is taking it to another level by setting himself a proper challenge each time.

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