DVDs and Films You Have Watched Recently 3 - The Final Insult

[tiger_rick]

I think I watched the worst film ever last night. My teenage daughter is in to cheesy rom-com shite so we watched something on netflix called Falling Inn Love. Successful executive in san Francisco loses her job and boyfriend, wins an "inn" (B&B) in New Zealand, moves out and it's a dump, does it up, falls in love with country and a bloke, they fall out, old life tempts her back, decides to stay, the end.

It features every rom-com cliche imaginable, all delivered horrendously, it written like an ad for the NZ tourist board (maybe was) and has a soundtrack you'd have to pay sugar tax on. Not only that but it is actually hideously shot. The screen size moves slightly throughout, the background of most shots feels blurry and the sound mixing is rubbish. Just horrific. The only good things about it are the landscapes and Christina Milian still being gorgeous.

Oh, and they got to a BBQ and someone gives them a hot dog that comes like this. Hard drive search required.

I'm getting a new kid.

Edited September 13, 2019 by tiger_rick

[Devon Malcolm]

I'd have done anything to have been present when they came up with its title though. Just an incredible piece of work.

[Rey_Piste]

Just now, Devon Malcolm said:

I'd have done anything to have been present when they came up with its title though. Just an incredible piece of work.

Wouldn't it be an Inn Credible piece of work?

[tiger_rick]

10 minutes ago, Rey_Piste said:

Wouldn't it be an Inn Credible piece of work?

He's not falling inn to that trap.

[CavemanLynn]

Sounds like every single tv movie on Movies24 that my wife's addicted to. Busy plain Jane executive has to leave the big city for some reason, to the generic Midwest as portrayed onscreen by Colorado or British Columbia (for tax breaks), reconnects with old family/flames and ends up saving the local farm/school/library etc by repurposing her big city skills to small town life. They've all got hallmark card or punbelievable titles, which I usually ignore in favour of "(insert whichever aging star has an overpaid recurring cameo, eg Bruce Boxleitner) Wants A Boat." 

Edited September 13, 2019 by CavemanLynn

[Merzbow]

Good Time was indeed a good time, Robert Pattinson put on a great showing and I can see why there's an amount of people really bigging him up now. Marked out a litle when I saw that twat Necro too, is he mates with the directors?

[Mr_Danger]

True Story was a bit pants. I was banking on Franco to not be very good but I figured the story and Jonah Hill would be enough to raise it but it feels so directionless. Felicity Jones is pointless in it. I think she's supposed to act as some sort of anchor to Jonah Hill's character but it never really feels like he's obsessively wrapped up in the case and he comes across as a bit of a dumbass. Even though it's a true story they probably could have done with taking one or two creative liberties with the characters, which is quite funny considering the films main theme.

Edited September 14, 2019 by Mr_Danger

[Loki]

All this talk of Costner, I don't think anyone mentioned Tin Cup, which is a really great sports film, the cinematic equivalent of a really nice glass of bourbon.  To tie everything together, it's written and directed by the director of the aforementioned Dark Blue!

Don Johnson has to be the most likeable Bad Guy in any film as well, he's so laid back you end up rooting for him a bit as well.

[DCW]

Watched a Costner film recently where he played a grizzled, maverick coast guard rescue lad who was too gung ho to be trusted on the rescue helicopter anymore, so they gave him a job teaching the recruits in the swimming academy.  Ashton Kutcher played the star recruit so I'd guess it was made in the early - mid 00's when he was flavour of the month. The dad from Home Alone/Tony's corrupt detective from Season 1 of The Sopranos plays a coast guard general and is good value in the role.

Kutcher is a class swimmer, but has a mysterious background and is too much of a risk taker, so himself and KC don't like each other at first. He's too muscular for KC's tastes too, and is informed in no uncertain terms that "muscle don't float".

 

After KC's wife leaves cos he's too married to the job or something like that, he takes an interest in Kutcher's background and finds out he was the sole survivor of a car that crashed into a lake in high school that all his pals died in, and has joined the coast guard out of guilt. Auld Kev respects this naturally, and they become drinking buddy's and bond over a fight with navy lads at the local pub.

There was some banal love interest for Kutcher, and he graduates from swimming school and is allowed out on the choppers. Then there's a bad storm and a fishing boat is in trouble out in the Alaska sea. KC won't let Kutcher go out by himself, so even though he's supposed to be retired, he goes out with him.

This obviously ends badly for Costner, who is lost at sea during the heroics and presumed dead. The film ends with Kutcher saying that legends goes that some folk believe Costner's spirit is still out at sea, helping rescue people who are in trouble.

A nice cheese fest all things considered, and Costner was very believable. 7/10

 

Edit- It's called 'The Guardian' apparently.

[DarloKid]

so, in light of Jean Claude Van Damme appearing at the Scotland comic con next month, I've gone on a Jean-Claude Van Dam-mathon. It's been brilliant, so many films I haven't seen since I was a kid and to this day I still love them, pre 95 films mind ….. but my god his career took a nose dive after 1995, and in fairness 95ish onwards the majority of his films from what I remember are utter trash. 

So, a few questions for you lovely people …. why did his career go to the shits ? you're favourite JCVD films and finally any of the straight to dvd films after 2000's, which one's would you guys recommend ?

[DEF]

Maximum Risk (1996) JCVD (2008) and Universal Soldier: Regeneration (2009) are all well worth a watch. JCVD is absolutely remarkable in fact.

[mim731]

So I just watched Yesterday (the Richard Curtis- Beatles movie). I'm so annoyed. Not because it was a bad film as such, but because it makes no sense. It feels like a half finished script that got rushed into production without dealing with any or the massive, illogical plot holes. So angry I sat through the heap of shite. 

[Egg Shen]

14 hours ago, DEF said:

Maximum Risk (1996) JCVD (2008) and Universal Soldier: Regeneration (2009) are all well worth a watch. JCVD is absolutely remarkable in fact.

i found the straight to video-era Van Damme movies to be a lot more tolerable than those of say Seagal and Snipes.

[Bellenda Carlisle]

34 minutes ago, Egg Shen said:

i found the straight to video-era Van Damme movies to be a lot more tolerable than those of say Seagal and Snipes.

I strongly recommend this to anyone who likes stupid straight to video shit, it's wild.

[Scott Malbranque]

Extra Ordinary - Decent enough idea but poorly executed. Might have been better with a better cast. It is quite funny - in parts - but it's nowhere near the 5 star movie seemingly every cunting critic is saying it is. A times the humour is Father Ted like and I was all "Okay, here we go, it's picking up now" and then it went back into Mrs.Browns Boys type bollocks and had me looking at the exit. But Maeve Higgins is lovely, in fairness.