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DVDs and Films You Have Watched Recently 3 - The Final Insult


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What Van Damme film do you think was better? "Bloodsport" or "Kickboxer"? It's like choosing your fave child. You've got the Stan Bush soundtrack on both of them too, which makes it even harder.

"Kickboxer" has this though..

 

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I walked into the sitting room after reading my daughter Oi! Frog, Oi! Cat, Oi! Dog and Oi! Duck Billed Playpus for bedtime and the missus was engrossed in Terminator 2, which I wasn’t expecting, beca

My poor missus had to put up with me kicking off over the whole debacle when I walked in the door last night after it. The poor woman. She was only about to get into bed and had to deal with a 39 year

Speaking of Jack Lemmon, my brother once worked at the Box Office in The Strand theatre.  Jack Lemmon was performing in a play there, he seemed down to earth but kept himself to himself.  Out of respe

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Glass - Probably my most anticipated movie ever and Syhamalan fucked it. He went and gikked...scuttered all over his masterpiece, the dozy cunt.
I'm absolutely devastated here. For the guts of twenty years, Unbreakable was my film to go to when I was in a bad place, for whatever reason, but that's gone now because of what that utter shitebag did to his own mythos.

The first half of the movie is absolutely phenomenal though, lads. Special, even. And then he goes and ruins the Shyamalanaissance doing the one thing fans of this 'franchise' really didn't want him to do with the characters, after investing so, so much love into the cunts.

The Beast kills Elijah after Dunn's son reveals it was Elijah who killed The Beasts oullad. The Beast dies after he turns into Kevin for a minute and gets shot. Dunn dies after soldiers drown him in water. Honestly would have taken a Bobby Ewing or a St.Elsewhere ending over that.

 

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If it turns out all three of them have actually been dead this whole time...

I only just saw Split and I thought it was fantastic, really a quality film.  I'm a much bigger fan of Shaymalan than most people, I adored The Village.  He is, when on form, one of the prettiest directors, his films look absolutely stunning and are technically brilliant.

So Split was such a thrill for me after such a string of really terrible films.  So you're breaking my heart here Branquey.

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1 hour ago, Loki said:

If it turns out all three of them have actually been dead this whole time...

I only just saw Split and I thought it was fantastic, really a quality film.  I'm a much bigger fan of Shaymalan than most people, I adored The Village.  He is, when on form, one of the prettiest directors, his films look absolutely stunning and are technically brilliant.

So Split was such a thrill for me after such a string of really terrible films.  So you're breaking my heart here Branquey.

It has completley Split the critics (pun intended). Have seen some positive reviews as well as some which echo Branquey.

I re-watched Unbreakable last week after watching Split and I found it good, but not as great as I remember being unfortunately. 

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I warned you all about Shyamalan!

Sorry you didn't like it though, Branquey, I was rooting for this to be great because I know how much you were anticipating it.

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My poor missus had to put up with me kicking off over the whole debacle when I walked in the door last night after it. The poor woman. She was only about to get into bed and had to deal with a 39 year old man calling a man he's never met, a cunt, a fraud, and a charlatan.

She knew I was going to see a screening of the sequel to the movie where, as she said " you turned into a fuckin' thick and started shaking in your seat as you shook my head from side to side wrecking my fringe?" so she knew the importance of it to me, and you know what she said to me last night? "Aw, my poor bumblebee? Did you at least enjoy the nachos?". My heart was broke after the movie, and that sentence emasculated me. Chopped my mickey clean off. But she meant well.

I'm sure the flick will be very divisive and some people will find it a beautiful movie with the only resolution it could have had (as my mate did), but that's bollocks. There was no need for what he did. It was disrespectful and after me defending that man and his movies for years...YEARS...he can shove his long takes and spinning camera's up his bollocks. And Philadelphia can fuck off and all.

 

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Oh, don't you know it? To be fair to him though, it was actually quite a funny scene, but I can't look back on anything in that movie with anything other than contempt at the moment.

I'm genuinely hoping that his big twist is that the screenings were just a wind up and the proper release will be better. That's all I have to cling to at the moment.
 

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I saw it last night and...I thought it was quite good. Its going to polarise (I'm above the pun!) a lot of the audience and I understand that BUT Samuel L Jackson is bloody class in it and its got some really great moments.

Its different and it skewers 'comic book movie' tropes. I think it might be a film that benefits watching it again when you know what's going to happen.

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1 hour ago, Factotum said:

I saw it last night and...I thought it was quite good. Its going to polarise (I'm above the pun!) a lot of the audience and I understand that BUT Samuel L Jackson is bloody class in it and its got some really great moments.

 

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Absolutely, it had great moments. I had serious goosebumps as they touched on Dunn/Joseph in a Batman/Oracle relationship, and for the opening hour, I was so happy. So, so happy to be where I was. Then it went into the third act and I felt like I'd just watched Shyamalan shite himself in white linen. The Sarah Paulson reveal was the beginning of the end for me.

I will say that everyone played their parts brilliantly. Jackson, Willis and especially McAvoy were everything they should have been, and not unlike our Loki there, I think...thought...thunk Shyamalan to be a genius and wonderful storyteller, but - excuse my bitter crudeness - he left me feeling gaped after that last final hour/hurdle.

I had a feeling there wouldn't be the huge fight that Elijah kept banging on about, but for Shyamalan to keep teasing it and then to just kill everyone off the way he did, in the manner that did, was appalling and has ruined one of my favourite movies of all time in Unbreakable for me.

I'm not even over exaggerating when I say that. I hold Unbreakable in the same manner that I imagine some people hold Star Wars.
How Blumhouse didn't put the brakes on that ending and make him reconsider is beyond me.

 

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Apologies for moving away from the Glass discussion although Branquey might like it that way, I've been ploughing through some Ghibli films I'd never seen (still got a few to go) this week.

I think Ponyo is the best of them but, typically, there are no weak films in The Cat Returns or Only Yesterday or Arrietty. They're always showing Ghibli films at The Light in Stockport but they're always evening showings so I can't get to them.

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Back when Play.com existed, they occasionally had sales on Ghibli movies at 3 for £15 and I managed to grab most of them up to Ponyo. I had a look at what ones I’ve missed since then and they’re all still going for over a tenner on eBay so I reckon I don’t care so much about owning them all when I can stream them for nowt.

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