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Red Nose Day


Loki

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So, it's that time of year again. People at work are preparing their hilarious antics for next Friday, and everyone's being encourage to wear wacky costumes on the day. The evening will be wall to wall Red Nose on tv with hours of celebrity mashups and skits and the like.

 

And I fucking hate it, hate hate hate. There may have been a time, 30 years ago, when the first one happened, when I enjoyed it, but it's so long ago, the only emotions the day calls up are negative.

 

I think the reason it bugs me so much is that people, who during the course of a normal year clearly don't give a shit about other people and would probably not piss on a tramp if it saved his life, suddenly become all pious and shit.

 

I'm not much one for charity anyway - call me old fashioned, but I feel that a society should be able to look after its disadvantaged without allowing peopl e to choose which subset are most worthy of support. But Red Nose Day has just become this monstrosity of poor taste and shit tv.

 

Am I alone?

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I prefer it to Children in Need. That's about as much as I can really add. Good cause etc. yadda yadda yadda, but the amusement level of the output has gone downhill massively in the last ten years or so.

 

That said, I'll tune in just to see that gaping cunt Jessie J get her head shaved and cry.

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I hate it and have the same conversation every fucking year. It goes along these lines

 

"What are you doing for Red Nose Day"

"Fuck all"

"Why not, have you no heart"

"Yes I have, what are YOU doing for Red Nose Day"

"Dressing up like a cunt so people will sponsor me, that's more than you do for charity"

"No it isn't"

"What do you do"

"Have standing orders, volunteer for projects etc all year round. How much do you donate for charity"?

"I've told you, I'm dressing up like a cunt"

"So you're donating no money then, you're doing it not for charity, but so you can get attention from the people you work with. If you DID care, you'd donate money and time all year round. You're the sort of person who sends flowers to their partner on Valentines Day to their work, so that other people can see that you sent them. Everything you do is based around you, even your supposed charitable endeavours"

"You're deeply unhappy, aren't you Keith"

"Yes"

"Want to talk about it"

"Not to you, no"

"Go fuck yourself, Houchen"

"OK"

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I tweeted a couple of things from the racist family members thread (crediting the forum), and Gwailofilms from here tweeted at me how there was a lad at his school who was banned from doing any Comic Relief activities because his mum didn't want him giving any money to black people.

 

:laugh: amazing

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It's generally an awful night of TV that seems to be stretched out over a few weeks now. I wouldn't mind the self-righteous preaching and barely-hidden attention-seeking agendas of the celebrities involved so much if the end result was something worth watching, but it generally amounts to some wanker doing a stupid dance and a few lazy sketches. I had the misfortune to leave my TV on BBC1 after the rugby the other week, and there was some bit where they sent fucking One Direction to Africa to tell us how terrible it is that African kids have malaria. Yes, I know it's fucking terrible, I don't need some androgynous 12-year old halfwit with his brains in his cock and a life of unimaginable privilege ahead of him to tell me that. As with any of these gurning celebrity telethons, tell me what percentage of your annual income you're actually donating yourself, and maybe I'll match it. Otherwise, fuck off.

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It's shit, and I can't be bothered to watch any of it this year round. In years past I might sit through some in case Vic and Bob were going to host for a bit or something like that, but it's just not worth the bother now. Has anyone one seen the Great British Menu comic relief thing they're doing at the moment? It's been going on for about 8 years now by my reckoning and the premise is that in order win a chance to cook a giant meal for Dawn French or something, the chefs have to create a dish with humour somehow imbued in it. As you might be imagine, that's fucking impossible and pointless. Worst telly ever.

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There was a chap on the UKFF a few years ago who asked for ideas for Red Nose Day. One of his own ideas was to wear the same pair of socks for a week.

 

People would pay him to stink.

 

Red Nose Day.

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There was a chap on the UKFF a few years ago who asked for ideas for Red Nose Day. One of his own ideas was to wear the same pair of socks for a week.

 

stingersplash?

 

How often this week do you think he will suggest all the women in his place of work go sockless? In the name of charity, obviously.

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