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UKFF Battle Rap 2012: Quarter Finals


Who do you think should advance to the semi-finals?  

25 members have voted

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The rules:


1. Each rap must consist of 16 lines. No more, no less.


2. Maximum of two raps each.


3. You have until 3:00pm on Saturday 18th February to post. If you post nothing by the deadline, you're out.


4. Voting will commence after the rapping deadline. The cut-off point for votes will be 10:00pm on Wednesday 22nd February.


Best of luck, sluts.

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So I have to battle Nicko, seriously, why?

After one verse he will be all "golly gosh" like Stephen Fry

If you step up to Houchen, Nick be very wary

I'm a motherfucking Hawk, you're just a shit canary


I can see it already, you're all nervous and flustered

Bad news old boy, you don't cut the Colmans mustard

Like the other chumps before you, you're dicing with death

I'm the fucking Zebra Kid, you're a Sunday League Ref


Enjoy the quarter final, coz you ain't gonna advance

Like the shitty pub quiz team name, you've got Norfolk and chance

Choose a new career path, as your rap one is over

Your skills wouldn't even make you third best in Cromer


You choke so much you throw up, whereas I throw nothing but good arrows

I bet you'd watch Saraya sleep while wanking in the shadows

You got slaughtered hard, but I'll continue to harm ya

You need more than Delia shouting "Come on then, WHERE ARE YA"

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Dear god Houchen, that's all you could muster, really?

Thought you were the big dog, turns out you can't piss up the tall trees.


Our Keith, I'm about to fuck you worse than any of your co-workers, yo,

When I'm finished with you, your face will be like a painters radio.


Thought I'd go down as easy as them? Mistake, ho

Take your eyes off me? Bigger mistake than when Droz slipped off of D'Lo.


Delia jokes! What a surprise. But this next statement is true.

You've a face of a gargoyle, and I'd never crawl over her to get to you.


Fool, I'm the Partridge of this game. My rhymes are slender with added splender.

You're a mere pretender and like Buust's leg, totally dismembered.


Your the Zebra Kid eh? Well, figures, he went to the slammer,

You dropped the soap and got a big black surprise up the shitter.


Thought you'd won it, but you underestimated the king of Colmans,

You're like an unsuspecting patient. I'm Dr. Harold Shipman.


Be a fucking man, and step up with your retort,

I'm off to find a hooker, her backside, then some cocaine for a victory snort.

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