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PILE ON! PILE ON!


Devon Malcolm

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The thought of people I went to school with passing away makes me wonder about those unusual characters that were with you in school, but nobody has seen or heard from since. To my knowledge just the one has passed away from my year since we left (I'm 25), real tragic story aswell, the lads dad committed suicide by hanging and then a week later he did the same in the same spot. A few people from other years have passed on aswell (all suicides), 2 teachers (one suicide, one road traffic accident). The weird thing is though our school had a memorial garden for kids that passed away whilst they attended school, that always unsettled me a bit, it wasn't discrete or anything, just a bunch of name plaques on a lawn. With all that death thrust at you everyday of your formative years coupled with the depressing reality of living in an pit village I'm suprised half our school haven't killed themselves.

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Im 28 and I know of two people I went to school with that have died. One was in an accident so a little easier to swallow, but the other died of Cervical cancer at 26. An absolute a waste. She was a great girl, such a shame.

 

Scary thinking about cancer at my age! Any come to that.

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As probably happens in every school, every time a new kid joined they'd get a period of being hassled. The extent of it depended on how they took it. One lad, Mitch, decided he wasn't taking any of this when he joined our school. It's the first lesson on Mitch's first day. This fat lad called Shaun decided he was going to be the first to start taking the piss out of this new kid. Shaun was thick as shit and nobody really liked him. I remember this like it was yesterday. Mitch turned around and saw Shaun approaching. He knew something was coming. As soon as Shaun said 'OI', Mitch swings around and hits Shaun with an uppercut. He throws a couple more punches and Shaun falls into a heap on the floor. Turns out Mitch had boxed with his dad since he was a kid. They had moved to our area so his old man could take over the local boxing gym. This lad clearly knew how to deal with arriving at a new school. Shaun's house ended up burning down a couple of months later. His poor cat died in the fire too. Last memory I have of him is dropping a tray full of test tubes and balling his eyes out in Science before legging it. Then to put the icing on the cake, he had to move to Scotland. The kid clearly didn't have much luck at all.

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My high school had a reputation dating back decades in the local area for being rough as hell. It's impossible to count the number of fights a year, but it was alot.

 

We also had some grade a nutters. I remember one guy in my year called Jon Bryden. He was an odd case, he used to sit in class chewing ink cartridges so much that his collar would be covered in ink. He also used to growl and bark at people. He loved a fight but wasn't really that good at it. I remember a catfight he had with this guy calleRichard Knott in music class once, rolling over tables and everything. We weren't really friends but we used to speak sometimes, I found his dog act hilarious. I bumped into him a few years ago at the worst moment possible. Its a long story so I won't bore you with too many details. I'd been up Lodon all day and by about 8pm I was going totally out of mind on magic mushrooms, so much so that I'd had to go home early because I couldn't handle it. Anyways, I finally got back to my stop on the tube but still had to get a bus back to my area. I got on the bus, sat down and prayed for this nightmare to be over. Then, I heard "Alright, Matty, haven't seen you since school." I looked up to see Jon standing there grinning at me. Of all the buses in all the world :confused:

 

I know of two people from school who have died. One was an old girlfriend of mine, died of liver failure (I think) at 17. I hadn't really kept in touch with her after school but we had mutual friends as we were part of the same group at school. I still remember the phone call. Her mum didn't want any of our group at the funeral so we held our own memourial and planted a tree at the spot where we would always congregate at breaktimes. RIP Lisa.

 

The other is less sad. This guy black guy from my year, Lloyd Lily. He was an absolute fucking cunt, no redeeming qualitys whatsoever. Your typical wannabe gangsta. About two years ago I read that he'd been murdered in some "gangland"killing. Good riddance, I say.

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Slightly Off Topic, But growing up in East Hull in the 1970"s & attending notoriously troubled school, I feel i must mention a few experiences with psychopathic Teachers. Times have change for the younger members of the UKFF & i can fully understand why anyone would question the truth of my revelations. You have to realise that back then there were no real guidelines to teaching, To the point that abuse of pupils was almost seen as a perk of the job!

 

1, We had a science teacher than doubled as a sexcase & regularly got a shower with his rugby team. He was always surrounded by boys ONLY!

2, A woodwork teacher with a sadistic streak, who specialised in setting his pupils on fire ( He new the rest of the class would extinguish his victims).

3. The cane/slipper/beatings were almost a daily occurrence. NEVER questioned & usually for trivial reasons or even just because the teacher took a dislike to a pupil?

4, Me & my school mates went away for a week in the middle of nowhere in the Countryside of West Yorkshire. It was a toss off for all the thick, Lazy kids to avoid a week at school. This was when what few rules of teaching went straight out the window! Anyone who got caught talking after lights out got a torch to the back of the head. Another kid pissed off a teacher, So he smashed a pyrex dish over his head! On a long walk (In a VERY cold winter) another pupil was punished by being thrown onto & threw an iced over lake. This was no accident, The teacher knew the lake could not take his weight!

 

Happiest days of your life, Eh? :angry:

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Going back to the whole thinking about my school days after my previous post, I remembered some of the other fights the school had while I was there.

 

Two stories

 

The first is going back to people pissing about and it ending up going serious. It was some simple fight over a picnic bench (I still have no idea how that started) which resulted in two groups of year 10's at the time (a group I was in and the other being the slightly thicker, tougher group) pretty much just killing each other for what was an extended lunch time, this thing went about 80 minutes, pure spotfest, people being thrown over fences, somebody got legit powerbombed into a tree and I ended up doing a horribly attempted suicide dive off my friend gorilla pressing me while stood on the top of this bench. It all went rather like a pissabout until one of the thicker kids decided to throw a proper punch and catch someone flush on the jaw. This kicked off a 8 person actual fight which ended with said picnic bench being broken to use as weapons before a teacher came out and put a stop to it. Ruled a no contest. Had a great multi man spot of a multiple headlock with the last guy hitting a russian leg sweep though and somebody getting speared off the bench. ROH eat your heart out.

 

The second involved a friend of mine, nice enough kid but just a bit crazy (red mist anger streak). During a game of Double's Tennis, his partner, a fucking annoying bellend that people were hoping would one day get hit, made some comment about him being crap and that he should've played with someone else. Red mist sets in, guy gets battered with a now square tennis racket (the school still has it even after 2 and a half years- saw it while I was doing work experience) a good 7 or 8 times straight to the middle of his face, which ended up the kid needing surgery to correct his breathing through his nose. 2 week suspension was all the other guy got, possibly a warning from the Police but we never heard anything about that.

 

Other fights generally were just your usual stuff where people would stand around shouting Fight until a teacher broke it up. Only other thing I can remember is being back in year 8 with a rivalry with the year 11's (no idea why) which resulted in our year being kicked out of where we hung around at lunch as we were the ones making the trouble. During that whole episode I got knocked out twice, once by a flying bin and once by a frozen apple.

 

Speaking of being knocked out at school. Getting concussion one winter because you're bored:

 

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1, We had a science teacher than doubled as a sexcase & regularly got a shower with his rugby team. He was always surrounded by boys ONLY!

I win.

What i forgot to mention was he was also a proper nasty bastard, With reall bad mood swings! I was in his form class for 3 years & had him for up to 5 single lessons a day (About 3 hours) Near the end of my time at that school, I think even he got bored with treating us all like shit. I always said that if i saw him when i was older, He would get some of the same shit that he dished out. Years later i saw him in front of me in a queue at the newsagents, I toyed with the idea & let him walk out unchallenged. He just looked like a sad old man, I just could not be bothered to waste my energy on him?

 

Anyone fancy a sexcase competition? During all my time at school, 3 teachers were convicted & 2 should have been (i would like to think that they got caught eventually as they were not exactly subtle?) So i am claiming 5 in just over 10 years of so called "Education", Any advances on that?

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1, We had a science teacher than doubled as a sexcase & regularly got a shower with his rugby team. He was always surrounded by boys ONLY!

We had a PE teacher who was like that, after every lesson he always tried to make us shower and he'd always and i mean ALWAYS get in the showers with the few who did go in and he'd stand far too close to them but again nothing ever happened to him and as far as i know he still teaches at my old high school.

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I bumped into him a few years ago at the worst moment possible. Its a long story so I won't bore you with too many details. I'd been up Lodon all day and by about 8pm I was going totally out of mind on magic mushrooms, so much so that I'd had to go home early because I couldn't handle it. Anyways, I finally got back to my stop on the tube but still had to get a bus back to my area. I got on the bus, sat down and prayed for this nightmare to be over. Then, I heard "Alright, Matty, haven't seen you since school." I looked up to see Jon standing there grinning at me. Of all the buses in all the world :confused:

 

Mate that is my absolute nightmare, better you than me, could you hold a conversation with him?

 

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I bumped into him a few years ago at the worst moment possible. Its a long story so I won't bore you with too many details. I'd been up Lodon all day and by about 8pm I was going totally out of mind on magic mushrooms, so much so that I'd had to go home early because I couldn't handle it. Anyways, I finally got back to my stop on the tube but still had to get a bus back to my area. I got on the bus, sat down and prayed for this nightmare to be over. Then, I heard "Alright, Matty, haven't seen you since school." I looked up to see Jon standing there grinning at me. Of all the buses in all the world :confused:

 

Mate that is my absolute nightmare, better you than me, could you hold a conversation with him?

Do you mean would i want to? The answer is "No". Although he was a very, very strange bloke & had a nasty temper he was one of the ones that never got convicted & although i strongly believe he was seriously dodgy. Apart from a few random acts of violence, I never saw him committing an "Act". Had that been the case i think i would have had more than a word with him in that newsagents.

When i left the shop i wondered if i did the right thing not challenging him on his conduct from my time in his class? Then a few weeks later i saw him again, So at least i realised after the second time i ignored him, That i never missed my chance because if i regreted it that much i would have had him the second time!

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Quality thread, most of the fights at my school were the same as I imagine they are in 99% of schools, two lads standing there going "fucking come on then" while a crowd surrounds them until a teacher turns up before anything actually happens

 

The few I can remember from my school that actually had any action were a lad who took the piss out of a weird lad's mum being dead being absolutely twatted for about an hour by said weird lad while the lads in the top year stopped him from running away, bit nasty that one

 

Another one didn't have much happen except that they ended up on a teachers car and when one of them smacked the other one it looked just like that bit at Mania 12 when Piper leathers Goldust on the car bonnet

 

The funniest one was two lads in the year below us fighting (ie rolling around giving each other headlocks) on the field and a lad from our year who was suspended turning up for no apparent reason with a carrier bag full of cans, drinking one and shouting "piss on him, piss on him" then he fucked off as soon as the teachers turned up

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