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Could you be a pro-wrestler?


Fatty Facesitter

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No fucking way.

 

I couldn't handle being beaten up for the shit wages wrestlers get.

I would also never go to a gym so I doubt many would pay to see me.

 

I could handle the travelling for sure but I hate most people, especially wrestlers, so wouldn't fit in.

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Tried for two years, ultimately failed. Couldn't hack it physically, found it hard to plan stuff I could remember when actually doing it and generally couldn't make what was in my head translate properly into physical movements. I was just in my head too much. But I gave it a fair crack and stopped before I injured myself or strayed into denying-your-own-shortcomings Shitarse Fifty territory.

 

This for me aswell, I'm not ashamed to say that I gave it a whirl for a couple of years. I could handle the pain, and could plan a few simple things but I was (and still am) too skinny to be anywhere near a wrestling ring, and would've definately been in the Shitarse 50 if I stepped into the ring that year. At least I wore proper tights, singlet and boots, but any kid can get hold of pro gear these days.

 

All in all, a total embarrassment to wrestling. Whenever my friends ask me if they should get involved, I always tell them to at least get tanned and put on an extra 100lbs of muscle before they even consider it.

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Not a chance in hell. The pain would be the least of my worries.

 

For a start, I'm quite a small dude. I'm only 5'8. That isn't a great start. To be fair, that isn't the be all and end all but if you're gonna be a wrestler at that height, you'd probably need to adopt a highflying style and I just don't have that sort of natural athletic ability. People see highflying moves so often that they forget how gifted you have to be to do that sort of stuff without stuffing it up. On top of that, I find travelling to be a bit of a ball ache at the best of times and it would drive me insane doing it every day and then having to worry about performing after that.

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I trained for a bit but I came to the conclusion that essentially paying to have a back ache for the following few days was not the greatest idea. Plus with my man boobs and sticky out love handles if i was to wear spandex I'd resemble some sort of flying squirrel.

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