Jump to content

The Rik Mayall/ Ad Edmondson Shows One Liner Thread


spotlightmagnet1

Recommended Posts

  • Paid Members

My favourites, in no particular order...

 

The Young Ones

 

Rick : "Neil! I will NOT be associated with saucers!!" (Demolition)

 

Rick : "Answer the phone, Neil!!" (Bambi)

 

Rick : "Hey, I know a joke about that as well. Listen, pay attention to me!" (Bambi)

 

Rick & Vyvyan : "Neil, your bedroom's on fire!" (Oil)

 

Rick : "What did you just say? You just called me a bastard, didn't you?" (Oil)

 

Vyvyan : "This is my friend called Mike, this is my friend called Neil, and that's a complete bastard I know called Rick." (Boring)

 

Rick : "For one man to love another, Vyvyan, is not poofy. It's actually very beautiful. It's only when they start touching each others bottoms that it gets poofy." (Flood)

 

In fairness my favourite line ever in The Young Ones is neither Rik or Ade but in Bambi when Miss Money-Sterling answers one of Bambi's questions by simply preening "I've got a porsche!"

 

Bottom

 

Eddie : "Bollocks mate, you killed him, he was dead before he hit the ground!" (Gas)

 

Eddie : "Nice people. Especially the bloke with the glasses, who wasn't holding a frying pan." (Gas)

 

Richie : "I can't see you, but I bet you've all got smashing blouses on." (Digger)

 

Eddie (doing the crossword) : "I think I'll just put 'Bollocks.'" (Culture)

 

Richie : "Tell me my dear, do you use Timotei?" (Parade)

 

Richie (looking through the Love Telescope) : "Fick uff, you sad pathtic winker... I wonder what she means??" (Holy)

 

Richie : "Let me get this straight : you have taken the ancient art of Buddhism, and perverted into a dastardly scheme whereby you take over the brain of a supermodel... just so you can get a quick ogle at her norks??" (Hole)

 

Eddie : "Although we, and indeed the whole BBC respect people's rights to believe in whatever they wish - because we don't want to get into the shit on this one - we don't actually believe in God, do we?" (Hole)

 

Richie (making his "resolve") : "Washing up liquid, hint of Domestos... Jif Micro Liquid WHERE ARE YOUUUU?" (Terror)

 

Richie : "I've got my tights on, Eddie's wearing a banana, are you going to give us any money or not?" (Terror)

 

Richie : "Let's see how much mischief you can get up to without any legs!" (Break)

 

Eddie : "I'll have a pint of mild, in a half pint glass." (Finger)

 

I actually think Bottom improved with each series and peaked in series 3, every episode practically had me in stitches from beginning to end. While light on "one-liners," Carnival is absolutely glorious, between the actual carnival to filming the household accident (I hurt myself laughing when Eddie jumped out the window) through the the seige, and Richie forgetting what decade it was (and Eddie's reactions thus) I really think it went out on a spectacular high.

 

Not a one-liner, but this exchange in Carnival is one of the cleverest, funniest things I've ever watched. :

 

Eddie : "At least we got the duck."

Richie : "The duck?"

Eddie : "Yeah... it's made out of plastic."

Richie : "Eddie, what in the name of Greek buggery, is the use of a plastic duck?"

Eddie : "It floats in the bath."

Richie : "But why?"

Eddie : "It's hollow!"

Richie : "Why the DUCK??"

Eddie : "It came free with the telly!"

Richie : "Eddie everything came free with the telly, we were looting!! Why didn't you get a free TELLY with the telly??"

Eddie : "Well it'd sink in the bath!!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 89
  • Created
  • Last Reply
  • Paid Members

"Hands up who likes me?"

 

Technically longer than one line but too good:

 

"Oh, Cliff

Sometimes it must be difficult not to feel as if

You really are a Cliff

When fascists keep trying to push you over it

Are they the lemmings?

Or are you Cliff?

Or are you, Cliff?"

 

"What do you think you're doing, pig?

Do you really give a fig, pig?

And what's your favourite sort of gig, pig?

Barry Manilow

Or the black and white minstrel show?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...