Paid Members ReturnOfTheMack Posted September 24, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted September 24, 2011 Oh God, some of the stuff I did when I had depression is horrible. A couple of example: Â helped a prostitute shoplift claimed to have watched a friend die so someone would buy me a drink had someone hold a (lit) lighter under my arm for nearly a minute to 'prove how tough I was' Â Â Thats the nicer stuff, Im too ashamed of the rest to even begin to admit to anyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Registration_Form Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 (edited) I pulled a good looking girl and then went on to piss the bed. That's all I've got to say.  The fact that I take some perverse pride in one-upping you here is is probably as lower point as any in this thread.. but I pulled a good looking girl and then pissed in her house mates bed.  ~edit~ sorry just read the shit story, who may take this little battle. Edited September 24, 2011 by Registration_Form Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdh85 Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Sat on the toilet in the ladies' room of an Indian restaurant in Coventry, dressed as the A-Train, getting coccaine sucked off my cock by a middle-aged woman, having failed to pull a lovely brunette who was gagging for it earlier in the night until I challenged her to a drinking game which made us both vomit. Â Then having said middle-aged woman run off when she realised I was only nineteen, leaving me alone in the ladies' toilets looking like a pervert. Then stumbling out of the cubicle and asking the girls doing their make-up in the mirrors on the way out if either of them "fancied finishing me off" - and being shockingly and inexplicably turned down. Â Then lying awake in an F1 motel with no usable lavs the whole night because my coke-tingling bell-end was keeping me awake and I needed a shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapnut Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 (edited) Sat on the toilet in the ladies' room of an Indian restaurant in Coventry, dressed as the A-Train, getting coccaine sucked off my cock by a middle-aged woman, having failed to pull a lovely brunette who was gagging for it earlier in the night until I challenged her to a drinking game which made us both vomit. Â Edited September 24, 2011 by Slapnut Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fleischmark Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Wanking into a pair of my mums soiled knickers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Duke Posted September 24, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted September 24, 2011 Wanking into a pair of my mums soiled knickers. Fucking hell. We have a winner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finbar Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Fleischmark is wrong. Â Very, very wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Icon Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 I would like to think that Fleischmark is joking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members air_raid Posted September 24, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted September 24, 2011 When I was 12 I kipped round my mate's house, and they let me stay in his sisters room (she wasn't home). His fit, 25-year-old sister. I had a wank in her bed. Â Christ, that sounds so tame next to the rest of your tales. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members FLips Posted September 24, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted September 24, 2011 (edited) When I was 12 I kipped round my mate's house, and they let me stay in his sisters room (she wasn't home). His fit, 25-year-old sister. I had a wank in her bed. Christ, that sounds so tame next to the rest of your tales.  Add me to the list of people who've had a wank in a mates house. 2 of them infact. While they were sleeping in the same room.  EDIT: But I wasn't staring at them, or doing it into their clothes or any weird shit like that.  Just thought I'd make that clear. Edited September 24, 2011 by TripleGay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RancidPunx Posted September 24, 2011 Share Posted September 24, 2011 Shagging 3 prostitutes in one night was a lowlight for me. Â Â This has happened to me twice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Bellenda Carlisle Posted September 25, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted September 25, 2011 (edited) This one isn't disgusting like some but still made me feel like shit. Â For this to work you have to know that I get embarrassed very easily in certain situations (although I'm impossible to embarrass in others) Â I was about 15 and my older brother had a lovely steady girlfriend but he stupidly slept with his bitch ex one night (I'm not defending it but it's his business and she was very manipulative) Anyway, I let the cat out of the bag and told his girlfriend (he was there too) about his affair totally by mistake, she ran out of the room in tears and he just looked at me like "what the fuck did you just do?" I was so embarrassed that I'd fucked up so royally that I pretended I did it on purpose to fuck him up, for some reason to me at the time it seemed preferable to be seen as an absolute cunt than someone who would make such a terrible faux pas. He ran after her but she was gone, he came back and shouted at me and I faked a smirk and still told him I did it to fuck him up (I was so gutted inside at how everything was turning out) he then proceeded to beat the shit out of me (which I didn't really deserve for an innocent mistake) I kept up the pretense that I'd told her on purpose and took the beating, I went to my room and just burst into tears in secret, bleeding and feeling terrible about what I'd done. He never found out it was a mistake and his girlfriend never came back to him. Me and him are close again now though, blood is thicker than water. I needed a talk with myself after that. Â I've also sharted, pissed myself, wanked everywhere possible (including a hospital bog while visiting a sick relative) and wanked sniffing my friend's big sister's pants in their toilet when I was 14. Edited September 25, 2011 by Pritt Stick Licker Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dork Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 Sat on the toilet in the ladies' room of an Indian restaurant in Coventry, dressed as the A-Train, getting coccaine sucked off my cock by a middle-aged woman, having failed to pull a lovely brunette who was gagging for it earlier in the night until I challenged her to a drinking game which made us both vomit. Â Were you part of the brilliant 'Save the A-Train' campaign at one of the British Uprising (I think) shows at the Sky Dome? Â Amazing scenes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members IANdrewDiceClay Posted September 25, 2011 Paid Members Share Posted September 25, 2011 There's some absolute scum on this forum. Makes the dolt of the year less credible when you see some of the deviants on here. The winner would only have to turn around and say "well, at least I didnt want sniffing my big sisters knickers, you freaks". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WU LYF 4 LYF Posted September 25, 2011 Share Posted September 25, 2011 (edited) If we're talking 'wanking in weird places' stories, I once got sent out of History for acting up when I was about fourteen, you'd get sent into this back room behind the classroom to work in isolation. Anyway, for some reason I got a boner and decided to knock one out there and then. Â It wasn't what I'd call a personal low point though, more a personal highlight, especially when I regaled friends with the tale and was received as a hero, from the people who actually believed I'd done it anyway. In hindsight, I probably should have kept my mouth shut as given the tendency of my friends to let their mouths run away with them it's amazing it didn't get back to any teachers. Â A more sobering school story is when a fellow-wrestling-friend and I had a bet in Year 9 that if we got a certain grade in out SATS we would blade our arms in the middle of a lesson, fuck knows why but we thought it was a laugh at the time. Anyway, we got the required grades, and proceeded to extract a blade from a school pencil sharpener. My friend was nominated to go first, and made some terrible tender attempts that didn't even break the skin. I then grabbed it and slashed away a few times at my arm, not expecting such a blunt instrument to do much. How wrong I was; blood poured from three gashes on my forearm (I still have the small scars!). Â Now I'd probably be alarmed but at the time we thought it was fantastic. My Maths teacher didn't feel the same way - I'd always been a bit of a trouble causer in that lesson (one of those teachers who get constantly fucked about), so she just sighed and said "For God's sake" and sent me to the toilets with my friend to clean it up. Unfortunately, by a perverse twist of fate we ran into the Deputy Head on the stroll downwards, who was horrified at the sight of my arm dripping blood, and I was sent to the medical department and then to his office, where he told me that "Self harming is very serious" and started asking if I needed counseling. He then rang my Mum to tell her the bad news that I'd been caught cutting myself. Getting in and having to face her questions about why I was suicidal, and did I need therapy etc etc counts as an ambarassing low point...my explanation that I slashed mr arms for a laugh because I'd seen it on the wrestling didn't wash. There were some weird questions in school the next few days as well. Proof that wrestling fans live in a different world to everyone else. Edited September 25, 2011 by RIP Diva Sunny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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