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Irrational Pet Hates


John Matrix

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As most of my topics seem to stem from a realisation that something irritates me or gets on my tits, but i don't feel it justifably should, this is no exception.

 

Not a thread for "I hate loud noise and coloureds", it's stuff that is perfectly harmless and in no way objectional, yet for whatever reason you take exception to it.  I largely start these threads to see whether it's just me or not who has such petty peeves.

 

So the one that's become glaringly obvious as i've noticed it more and more over the past few weeks, is when people refer to people you've never met and dont know, by their first names without any form of introduction.

 

For example, we just bought the little'un a little jumperoo thing right - comes up in conversation and a colleague starts saying "Oh yes, Ethan has one of those, he loves it".  I dont know who's kid Ethan is, only that it isnt theirs.

 

The other one is "Ah yes, Margaret and I are off to a country pub at the weekend"  I dont know your wife, i've not met your wife, so "I'm taking the wife to a country pub this weekend" is far more appropriate - Maybe it isnt their wife, maybe its a female relative or they are embarking on an affair, but that's the whole point!

 

It's ridiculous isnt it?  I know they dont, but in my mind, it's just people being pompous and making Ethan and Margaret out to be people we should be kicking ourselves to be missing out on - i'm more annoyed at myself for wasting energy being annoyed by things like this than anything else, so if anyone wants to make me feel better and post something perfectly acceptible that the find to be a nuisance, please feel free.

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People who say they're going to give 110% or 120% or 200%, when it defies logic. Where does it stop? Some people even say 1000% now, because somehow 200% isn't perceived as enough anymore.

 

100% is the max, you retard.

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People who come up to me to talk without a specific plan of attack in mind — I detest small talk, and I won't have anything to do with it. This may explain why I have three friends.

 

On the flip side, people who disengage from online conversations without an exit strategy — if I send you a message, you'd better respond, even if it makes no sense. If you want to end the conversation, fake your own death, like a normal person.

 

Also, people who don't review my share-a-playlist entries. You know who you are.

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Tuna. I've walked out of my house before because someone was making Tuna. I'm pretty sure there's some irrational fear stemming from childhood but I hesitate to ask.

 

Tuna makes me gag. So does wet cat food. The wife is currently feeding wet cat food to our hedgehog. Makes me feel ill.

 

I hate people who say "What am I like, me?". Have to remember it's rhetorical and not reply "You're a cunt".

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People who press the button on pedestrian crossings when they've just seen you press it. One day I'm going to nut one of these cunts.

 

This.  Almost as bad as walking up to a crossing to join a group of people and then noticing that not one of the fuckers has bothered to press the button yet, as if magically waiting for the lights to change on their own.

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People who press the button on pedestrian crossings when they've just seen you press it. One day I'm going to nut one of these cunts.

*Like*

 

And them people who you tell that the ATM is not handing out money but they try anyway.

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People who, after they’ve finished there Sunder roast, start lapping up the gravy with their knife and fork. My girlfriend’s family is the worst for this, and I hate it for some reason.

 

Americans pluralising “LEGO” and singularising “maths” is another.

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