Butch's Poetry thread. Options

[PowerButchi]

I like to get a mental sweat on now and again. Had a hard couple of days, and I thought I'd articulate myself though the power of poetry.


It was the 5th of september,
and they came from all around.
To put the lid on the case,
of the people who were sound.

They didn't support five teams,
nor were they bald.
But they all liked a joke,
yet baldy was so cold.

He thought people were on his side,
but chatting, having a chat,
they made it quite clear...
he was a shat.

But I go to a forum this evening,
and what I see I'm barely believing.
Despite grabbing for rhymes,
I've done no crimes.
I've never invented initials,
I've never used the three sea shells,
I've never made a rod for my own back,
mind you, I have been called a twat.
But I've never made a song or dance
of making myself look like a dick, perchance.
I do it for a hobby,
but I'll lobby,
for the idiot to stand up.

This post has been edited by ButchReedMark: Sep 7 2011, 4:39

[tiger_rick]

I'm quiet honoured that while I'm tucked up in my bed with my lovely wife in my lovely house, you're thinking about me. I pity you but I'm honoured all the same.

[TripleA]

This one is called "Can't we all just get along?"

Woke up to find a poetry thread,
it gave me quite a titter.
But just like the morning's cold outside,
Tiger Rick's reply is bitter.

So what about his lovely wife?
Other people can pull birds too.
Well apart from maybe smeg and the heads
because he's asexual incase you had no clue.

I'd drop a few more rhymes for you,
but I have to catch the bus.
Stop being a bunch of girls you lot
Rick, stop making such a fuss.

Can't we all just get along?

[Jaffa]

So what about his lovely wife?
Other people can pull birds too.
Well apart from maybe smeg and the heads
because he's asexual incase you had no clue.

Utterly brilliant.

[tiger_rick]

I shouldn't have responded at all. I would have retracted it but TripleGay was too quick to reply. I was genuinely impressed with the poem.

[bAzTNM#1 Fan]

What the fuck is with those initials three?
The fuss created bewilders me.
It's just a repeat of the Elite Hate Squad
Surely a ignorable triviality to a Mod?

[Scott Malbranque]

I Think I've Caught The Gay

I wake up in the morning, and jump into the shower
I have a wife next to me, but for some reason I cannot plough her
Instead I go to the kitchen, log onto Spankwire all randy
Skip past the hardcore bukkake, and go straight to the trannys

I frantically pull down my pants, and pull the stomach out of myself
To the sight of a dude named Carmen, tugging at her balls and breasts
A gaping hole, I'm on a roll, my calves begin to tense
I blow my muck, I'm out of luck, my sexuality's on the fence

I make my wife some breakfast, and bring it to her in bed
I'm having a moment of guilt, I should have doused it on her chest instead
I get myself ready for work, and prepare myself for the day,
Because I then use two face creams, I reckon I've caught the gay

True story

[Astro Hollywood]

If whoever was behind Hurtardo was to reg that as a second account and post in this thread, I'd totally let that slide.

[dopper]

Oh, Cliff.
Sometimes it must be difficult not to feel as if
You really are a Cliff.
When fascists keep trying to push you over it.
Are they the lemmings?
Or are you Cliff?
Or are you, Cliff?

[wandshogun09]

I Think I've Caught The Gay

I wake up in the morning, and jump into the shower
I have a wife next to me, but for some reason I cannot plough her
Instead I go to the kitchen, log onto Spankwire all randy
Skip past the hardcore bukkake, and go straight to the trannys

I frantically pull down my pants, and pull the stomach out of myself
To the sight of a dude named Carmen, tugging at her balls and breasts
A gaping hole, I'm on a roll, my calves begin to tense
I blow my muck, I'm out of luck, my sexuality's on the fence

I make my wife some breakfast, and bring it to her in bed
I'm having a moment of guilt, I should have doused it on her chest instead
I get myself ready for work, and prepare myself for the day,
Because I then use two face creams, I reckon I've caught the gay

True story

haha brilliant, cracked me up that (no pun intended)

[PowerButchi]

I love you Scott Malbranque.

[Silky Kisser]

Thanks, Dopper. Coffee spat over my desk and the guy next to me looking at me like I'm a mental.
Haven't heard that for so long.

[Loki]

I'm quiet, honoured that
While I'm tucked up in my bed with my lovely
Wife in my lovely
House, you're thinking about me.
I pity you
But I'm honoured
All the same.

Fixed for poetry.

[Scott Malbranque]

Fixed for poetry.

That's fuckin genius, that!!!! Brilliant.

I love you Scott Malbranque.

And I you, Butch, and I you.

[PunkStep]

I Think I've Caught The Gay

I wake up in the morning, and jump into the shower
I have a wife next to me, but for some reason I cannot plough her
Instead I go to the kitchen, log onto Spankwire all randy
Skip past the hardcore bukkake, and go straight to the trannys

I frantically pull down my pants, and pull the stomach out of myself
To the sight of a dude named Carmen, tugging at her balls and breasts
A gaping hole, I'm on a roll, my calves begin to tense
I blow my muck, I'm out of luck, my sexuality's on the fence

I make my wife some breakfast, and bring it to her in bed
I'm having a moment of guilt, I should have doused it on her chest instead
I get myself ready for work, and prepare myself for the day,
Because I then use two face creams, I reckon I've caught the gay

True story

Defintely up there with the best posts of the year